#worldbuilding ideas

LIVE

the-orc:

normal-horoscopes:

normal-horoscopes:

Elf video games: 300 hour jrpgs with legions of characters and several novels worth of text. Labrynthine upgrade trees and customization options. The most insufferably unintuitive UI possible. A single turn based battle can take hours. Every character has an ennui stat.

Dwarf video games: Basebuilding strategy FPSs that has a whole wiki page on the flexile vs tensile strengths of different building materials. Dwarven rhythm games have minigames where you have to manage supply lines. Mortals cannot comprehend dwarven grand strategy games.

Halfling video games: What appears on the surface to be a viscerally calming farming sim is actually an extraordinarily complex social combat game about cutthroat HOA politics.

Goblin video games: Wildly unbalanced collectathon gatchas where half the fun is finding new hilariously broken strategies. Zany uberviolent team shooters about bugs. MOBAs so bad it’s almost art.

Orc video games: Addictive in-browser flash games with names like “Beast Crush 4” and “Borag Meat Game.” The art is always kinda bad but in a charming way. The music always slaps.

Goblin code looks incomprehensible but if you take the time to look through it, you realize it’s actually optimized in ways you never thought were even possible. Goblins are responsible for like 75% of every games modding community. Goblins all run Linux.

There is no orc game larger than a gigabyte. There are legends of an orc coder successfully ran DOOM on a raw lamb shank.

My cousin Grob ran DOOM on a lamb shank

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