#yoon jeonghan
널 잃으면 내 자신이 싫어질 것 같으니까. Because I think I would hate myself if I lost you.
Description: Jeonghan comes to you to be consoled and while cleaning his wounds, his guard drops and he confesses the feelings he’s been harboring for a while.
Warnings: Swearing, blood and cuts
Genre: Angst, Fluff, MafiaBoss!Jeonghan x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 2.9k
SeventeenMasterlist|Masterlists
The club’s music echoes through the walls of the private room but it’s become so familiar that I can easily ignore it. I sip from the champagne flute and let the small amount of bubbles tumble down my throat before smiling and placing a hand on the shoulder of the man who sits very close to me.
“So, you were telling me about your work?” I ask, putting in extra effort to seem extremely interested.
The man, Henry, sighs and man spreads a little wider. “Ugh, I don’t particular like the line of work or my boss but the pay is too good. I can live so comfortably with it.”
“Comfortable indeed.” I smile sweetly, lean in closer, and rest my legs over one of his. My skin tight dress twists and I know I’m going to have to fix it when I stand up.
His hand rests on top of my thigh and my sense heighten in case he gets any ideas.
“We just finished an awfully big project and I think my hands gained two pounds of muscle from all the typing I had to do.” Henry comments while flexing his other hand out in front of us.
I gasp lightly in faked astonishment. “I think you may be right. So muscle-y hands and a nice pay check are your rewards for working through a shitty job.” I say and lean my head down on the hand that’s on his shoulder.
His shoulders shake with a chuckle, “Now if I could find a nice girl to settle down with, that would make it perfect.” He says with a sigh but there’s an underlying question that I know is coming if I don’t respond properly.
“You’ll find her. But I don’t think you’re going to find her here.” I say, the music still pounding against the walls, “You know the rules.”
“Yeah, yeah. This place and all its rules.” Henry rolls his eyes, “No touching above or below certain points. I can’t order drinks for you. I can’t leave the premises with you. I can’t blah, blah, blah.”
I glower at him slightly but he ignores me.
“Rules are meant to be broken, or is your boss really that stuck up?” He continues and I can feel the anger bubble up in my chest.
“If you didn’t like the rules, you didn’t have to agree to them.” I remind him, “And you should be careful with what you say. You know who runs this club.”
Before he can say anything back, the door to the room flies opens and my body untangles itself from Henry in a second. A floppy brown haired man walks in, the music from the club following him and invading the previously quiet room. It’s Jeonghan, the owner of the club and the leader of the group that runs this part of town.
Jeonghan stumbles towards the other side of the U-shaped couch and plops himself down, hands buried in his hair and his gaze trained on the floor. His body heaves up and down with the heavy breaths he taking.
“Get out.” He growls at us but my focus is on his knuckles which are beat up and red with stains of blood.
My heart picks up at the thought that he’d be hurt and then it worries as to how he got hurt.
“Come on.” Henry grabs my arm and lifts me to my feet while my eyes are still on Jeonghan.
He leads me towards the door with his grip tightening on my arm. I hiss as his grip makes my nerves explode with red flags.
“Not her. Just you.” Jeonghan says with a steely voice but he hasn’t even moved a muscle.
“Hey, I paid for the hour.” Henry spits back at Jeonghan, “I will be getting my hour.”
“Get. Out.” Jeonghan threatens through gritted teeth. I can feel his anger radiating off of him.
I pull my arm out of Henry’s grasp and place a light hand on his chest. “Just go.” I tell him, trying not to show my annoyance towards him, “Go see May, and I’m sure Wonwoo,” I glance at the man in the doorway, “Will explain the situation and help you get a refund.”
Henry opens his mouth to protest but I cut him off before Jeonghan explodes.
“Just go now and come back next week. Go now before you’re unable to return next week.” I sharpen my voice to make the urgency clear as day.
Thankfully, Henry gets the message.
“Okay. I’m gone.” He says before walking out of the room.
Wonwoo closes the door and the room falls into silence besides the dull drumming of the music. Turning to look at Jeonghan, he still hasn’t moved but his breaths aren’t as heavy as they were.
Wordlessly, I make my way over to the cupboard where we keep everything our girls might need for a private session, including a first aid kit. Which is exactly what I’m going for. Pulling the kit out, I pull out a couple of water bottles before walking back to the couch. I place the water bottles and the first aid kit on the table before gently sitting down next to Jeonghan.
He doesn’t even flinch as I lean in to inspect the cuts on his knuckles.
“You okay?” I ask when I’m confident none of his cuts need stitches.
Jeonghan doesn’t respond with words but just nods his head once.
“Will you let me clean your hands?” I ask softly, my heart aching that whatever happened is the reason he’s not acting like his normal self.
Again he doesn’t speak or move but just nods his head.
I walk back over the cupboard and grab a small towel before returning to the couch. Pulling an empty glass over to me, I open a water bottle and fill the glass. I wet the towel in the glass and turn my body to face Jeonghan. Watching closely for any reaction, I gingerly pull one of his hands out of his hair and towards me. He lets me do so without any resistance so I start wiping away the blood with the towel.
“He’s relentless.” Jeonghan mumbles and lowers his head further.
“Who is?” I ask though I have a gut feeling I know exactly who he’s talking about.
“Grayson.” He says and his voice is straining to keep himself calm.
My heart drops upon hearing the name of the man who is determined to take me. I try to ignore the fear prickling my skin by focusing on cleaning Jeonghan’s hand.
I drag the towel over a particularly red spot and Jeonghan hisses.
“Sorry.” I apologize and blow some air over the area to cool it down.
I work the towel down his fingers and wipe the trails of red off his smooth skin.
“He keeps showing up,” He says and lets out an angry breath, “And I swear the next time I’m going to blow hi- Ah!” He yelps as I run the towel over another open cut. “Careful.” He scolds me and looks me in the eyes.
I inhale sharply at the state of his face more than the fact that he jumped. His bottom lip is busted, a nasty looking bruise is forming on his cheek, and he has a cut above his eyebrow that has blood smeared around the skin. Instinctively, I grab his chin and turn his head to inspect his injuries.
“What happened?” I ask with more concern laced into my voice than I had intended.
He pulls his head out of my grasp and looks away from me. “Hopefully a good threat.”
I let my hand fall back to his hand but my eyes never leave his face, “Just tell me he looks worse.” I plead with concern.
Jeonghan smirks, “You think I would let a nobody like him beat me like this without leaving him faring worse? I’m pretty sure he’ll be nursing his wounds for weeks.”
I frown slightly hearing the amount of damage he caused but at the same time, a weight lifts off my shoulders in relief that the other guy is worse off. I finish cleaning his one hand before reaching into the first aid kit for some gauze.
“You don’t have to put that on.” Jeonghan says, glancing back at my actions as I place some antibiotic ointment on the open cuts.
“I do and I will.” I tell him before wrapping his knuckles with the gauze. “Otherwise you’ll get infected and that’s not good.”
Jeonghan huffs in annoyance but doesn’t say anything else. After his one hand is wrapped, I move to his other hand. I make quick work of cleaning this hand but the silence sitting around us makes the time seem to drag out for hours. By the time I’m done wrapping the second hand, neither of us has notice that I’ve scooted closer to him.
Dipping the towel into the water glass, I wring out the pink tinted water before forcing Jeonghan’s face to look at me. Starting with the cut on his eyebrow, I clean off the skin farthest from the cut and make my way closer. His eyes watch my face intently and it takes everything in me not to meet his gaze. With every second that he stares at me, my heart picks up speed until it’s pounding against my chest like the bass of the music against the walls.
Carefully, I wipe away the blood in his eyebrow before hesitating to wipe at the cut.
“This might sting.” I say in a tiny voice, blinking my eyes down to meet his piercing gaze.
He wraps an arm around my waist and closes his eyes in response. The weight of his arm on my waist is heavy and won’t be easily ignored. With a steadying breath, I wipe at the cut to clean it out. Just as the towel makes contact with the
open wound, he sucks in a breath and his hand grips my hip.
“Sorry.” I whisper as I continue to gingerly wipe at the cut. “Okay.” I tell him while setting the towel down and picking up the ointment.
Jeonghan opens his eyes as I place some ointment onto his cut to help it heal but his hand stays around my waist.
“You know,” I say, switching to the towel again, “You’re pretty bloody for someone who’s nickname is ‘clean hands.’” I bring the towel up to his lip and carefully wipe it.
A smile tugs at his lips but the stretching of the skin makes him stop immediately and groan in pain. The cut starts to bleed slightly again and I dab the towel against it to keep the blood from trickling down his chin.
“Careful.” I remind him softly. “Do you need any pain killers or anything?” I ask him, pressing the towel to his lip again and glancing up at his eyes.
He watches me with soft eyes for a heartbeat before shaking his head. “No, I can handle it.”
I frown at his answer, but decide to leave it alone. Pulling the towel away, I’m glad to see that his lip has stopped bleeding so, I put some ointment over it. Capping the ointment tube, I try to scoot away but Jeonghan’s grip around my waist tightens.
I glance down at his arm before back up at his face with a questioning look.
“Just humor me a bit.” He says calmly but I think I catch a bit of embarrassment in his voice. He reaches for one of the filled champagne glasses but I quickly grab it out of his hand.
Jeonghan gives me a 'what the fuck’ look but I just grab the other glass. “Drink mine. I’m pretty sure I saw him slip something into his and I don’t want you to find out what it was.” I explain, placing my glass into his frozen hand and setting Henry’s glass onto the table.
“He’s never coming back here.” Jeonghan shakes his head and brings the glass to his lips, taking a sip out of it. “His first time and he goes and breaks the rules.”
“Rookie mistake.” I comment and lean in closer to him.
Relaxing against his shoulder, I think back to the reason he’s all cut up like this.
“You know Grayson’s probably going to keep coming back.” I sigh with downcast eyes.
“I know.” Jeonghan says and rubs his thumb against my side. Even though there’s the fabric of my dress in between, my skin still tingles with his touch. “But I’m setting up a plan to make sure you’re safe.”
“What plan?” I question, looking up at him and ignoring the last part of the sentence.
His jaw clenches and he takes another sip to calm himself, “You’re not going to be out on the floor anymore.” He explains, resting the champagne glass on his thigh, “I’ve been looking for someone to manage the girls and I want you to do it. And until that creep leaves, you will go home escorted or you will stay here if you need to.”
My heart skips a beat at his suggestion. Stay here? The same place he stays? The upper levels that we’re hardly ever allowed into?
Before my brain can stop itself, I ask, “Why?”
Jeonghan pauses and I can feel all the air in the room vaporize like boiling water on a negative 40 degree (Fahrenheit but it’s the same in Celsius) day. I start to majorly regret asking the question but when he looks down at me and the softness of his eyes wipes away any regret.
“Because I think I would hate myself if I lost you.” He says softly. So softly, in fact, that it’s a stark contrast to the sharp edges of his features and his usual voice.
“I would never go willingly.” I say, internally cringing when my voice hitches slightly.
“I know that, but I don’t want it to come to that.” Jeonghan murmurs.
I smile softly and hear the care in his words, but I still can’t help myself from asking, “But why me?”
He lets out an airy chuckle, “You’re really going to make me say it?”
“How will I know if you don’t?” I answer his question with a question and a slight smirk.
“Because as much as I hate to say it or admit it, you’ve become my weakness.” He explains and I inhale in surprise, “The first day you came here, knowing who I was and what my reputation was, and yet, you wouldn’t leave until I agreed to take you in. You care the other girls and keep the guests in line better than any of my men ever could. You keep this place running like a proper establishment. Not to mention you’re absolutely beautiful.” He finishes and a blush creeps onto my cheeks.
“If I had it my way, you wouldn’t even be working at the club but I figured you’d fight me on that.” Jeonghan adds with a twinkle in his eye.
I giggle, “You were right about that. I’m not leaving the other girls alone.” I take a breath before asking, “But if I wasn’t working here, where would I be and what would I be doing?”
He looks away bashfully, “Hopefully, you’d be at my side and you’d be doing whatever you wanted.”
“You’re beating around the bush, Jeonghan.” I lean away from him to look at him properly.
“God, you’re so infuriating sometimes, you know that?” Jeonghan says and leans his head back.
“I like things blunt and to the point. And you are certainly not giving me that right now.” I bluntly tell him, not caring how it may have sounded if anyone else was around.
He lifts his head back up, sets the champagne flute down before bringing his hand to cup my cheek, “Another reason I’m absolutely, most definitely falling for you.”
My heart flutters like the wings of a million humming birds and I feel like I can hardly breathe, in a good way.
Jeonghan stares into my eyes, searching for any reaction while leaning in extremely slowly. “You can stop me.” He reminds me, “There are rules.”
“And if I want to break the rules?” I question him, not breaking my gaze.
By now, he’s so close I swear I can feel his lips ghosting against mine, “Then I’ll add it to the list of things that make me fall for you.” He whispers before crashing his lips onto mine.
His lips are soft as they move against mine as easily as waves across the sea. The arm around my waist pulls me closer to him and I wrap my arms around his neck, kissing him harder.
Pulling away sooner than I would have liked, he rests his forehead against mine, the tip of his nose barely touching mine.
“What are you going to do about Grayson?” I quietly ask and he growls in disgust.
“I’ll make sure he chooses to stay away or I’ll make the choice for him.” Jeonghan says through gritted teeth and I move my hands to his shoulders in hopes to calm him a little.
“And I think I’ll stay by your side.” I tell him to get his mind off of Grayson.
“That’s all I ask for.” Jeonghan smiles before pressing his lips against mine again.
