#absrtract drawings

Uncertain

Heaviness, anguish, despair, disfiguration, revulsion, anger, and hatred. These were all the emotions I felt when I heard the word “Cancer.” I was uncertain exactly how it would affect me or life. What kind of destruction was in its wake? It was a heavy anchor to bear. And it was mine alone. I had many family members that were there to help, but friends left m. It made me feel like I was contagious and it hurt. I was carrying such a heavy load. I didn’t want my family to suffer, so I would put on a front as if everything was okay. Yet, on the inside I was contemplating many things. I didn’t know whether or not I wanted to go through the chemo treatments. I didn’t know what the chances were if I didn’t. I just wanted to wake up and have it all be a bad nightmare. Yet, I was anchored to this cancer that wanted to stop my life. I knew the consequences, but I didn’t want to face the reality. No one likes uncertainty.