#angsty imagine

Previous Chapters

Introduction/Author’s Note/ Chapter 1: The Journey to the Burrow/Chapter 2: Hidden Letters /Chapter 3: Ron’s Return/Chapter 4: Nighttime Conversations/Chapter 5: A Morning Surprise/Chapter 6: The Quidditch Match/Chapter 7: Girl Talk/Chapter 8: Aphrodite’s Push/Chapter 9: Mistakes and Love Potions

Chapter 10: You Would be Fine

Author’s Note: Hi everyone! Thank you so much for all the love and support for this fic, it means so much to me :) Get prepared because this chapter is a lengthy one (about 4,200 words I think…oops). Also, the gif has nothing to do with the chapter I just thought Ron looked really cute lol. Okay anyways enjoy!!!

You were fine. Really you were.

Every time Hermione or Ginny gave you a concerned look while passing, you could easily plaster on an “I’m-good-everything-is-good-thanks-for-asking” smile onto your face.

In reality though, your heart hurt ever damn day.

About 2 weeks ago, Ron broke your heart. Under the oak tree outside, he told you that whatever happened between you was a mistake. Mistake. So instead of moping around for the rest of your summer vacation, you tried to be happy. During the day time you would laugh and joke with the Weasleys, help make meals, finish your school work, and do chores. But at night is when you finally let yourself feel your heartbreak. Once everyone fell asleep, you would creep down the stairs and sit underneath the oak tree, and cry.

It was therapeutic, kind of. With each passing night, you felt better. Yes, it still hurt seeing Ron’s freckled face every morning at breakfast. And it still made your skin and body ache when he accidentally brushed up next to you in the tight kitchen. But you were okay.

You knew that if you let Ron fully see how heartbroken you were, it would change the dynamic between you. You were best friends, and nothing more. No matter how much you loved him, that’s all you would ever be. Instead of jeopardizing the friendship you had come to cherish so greatly, you simply suppressed your love for Ron so you could maintain it. And it was working, king of.

The night after your heartbreak at the oak tree, you started treating Ron exactly as you had before you came to the Burrow, before you had let your emotions run wild. He reciprocated this and before long, you were best friends again. You played Quidditch on each other’s team, joked around with Fred and George, tried the newest Weasley Wizard Wheezes products (though you stayed away from the love potions), and played wizard’s chess together. Although your heart still skipped a beat whenever Ron leaned closer to you, everything was back to normal with your best friend.

Over the past 2 weeks, you had been alternating between sleeping in Ginny’s room for sleepovers, the bed in the attic, or the couch in the living room. Ron didn’t offer his room to you again, which made you sad but you understood. If you were alone with him late at night when your emotions were high, your cover of “nope-i-don’t-love-him-we-are-just-best-friends” was going out the window. So you stuck to your usual 3 beds.

That morning, you had awoken from the attic bed bright and early. Hermione had been getting the girls up at 8am for the past 2 weeks so that you could finish your school work early in the morning and have the rest of the day to relax. Although you hated her every morning for this, you were glad she had such a strict regimen because you had all finished your homework yesterday. Now, for the rest of the summer you were homework free.

By now you were so used to waking up early that it was no longer a surprise for anyone to see you help cook breakfast with Mrs Weasley. Besides Hermione, you two were usually the first awake and in the kitchen right away. This morning was no different as you padded down the creaky wooden steps into the kitchen.

“Good morning Mrs Weasley,” you greeted her, tying an apron around your waist. There were four aprons in the Weasley house; a floral one designated for Mrs Weasley, a dark blue one for Mr Weasley when he would attempt to use a muggle grill, a plain white one for whoever decided to help cook, and a yellow one with stars for you. Mrs Weasley even spelled your name, y/n, on the edge in elegant cursive.

“For my newest child,” she has said when she showed it to you. She pinched your cheeks, the way she did with all of her kids, and the action almost made you tear up. You threw your arms around her in a tight hug and thanked her profusely.

Mrs Weasley smiled approvingly at you as you started on the breakfast. As the usual morning rhythm took place, you cherished the routine of cracking the eggs, putting them in pans, flipping them, and then doing the same thing again and again.

But soon, Mrs Weasley’s voice broke the silence. “Sweetheart, what happened with Ron?” she asked.

Your head snapped up from the frying pan, your eyes meeting Mrs Weasley’s. She looked at you with motherly concern, and for some reason you couldn’t look at her loving face and lie to her.

“I don’t think he feels the same way that I do about him,” you stated, turning your attention back to cooking.

Mrs Weasley huffed. “Well, my son has never been the sharpest boy, as you know,” she said. You giggled, though you were still sad, and she smiled at you. “Maybe things will change honey,” she told you, “love happens unexpectedly.”

Before you got the chance to reply, thundering footsteps sounded from the staircase. You whipped your head around to see the twins barreling down the steps, practically tripping over one another in their hurry.

“Where’s the fire?” you asked.

Fred ran across the room, picked you up around the waist, and spun you around.

“Percy’s home! His work is called off for the week because of his birthday!” He shouted excitedly. You laughed, swatting at him with your spatula until he set you down.

“I didn’t know you two were so excited to see your brother,” Mrs Weasley noted, fixing her sons with a stern and skeptical stare.

“Oh mother, we’re not,” George replied.

“We’re excited to mess with him for a week straight,” Fred added with the largest grin you had ever seen.

As soon as the words left his mouth, more of a promise than anything else, the front door swung open and in entered the most prestigious Weasley of the house. With his rigorous work schedule, you hadn’t seen Percy once this entire summer. But now, here he was, standing in the kitchen in a three piece suit with a pocket watch and shiny black shoes at 8 in the morning.

“Hi Percy,” you said, trying your best not to laugh at the long tail of his suit coat.

“Whatthehell are you wearing?” Fred asked, his face shocked as he took in Percy’s outfit. George’s face was bright red as he held in his laughter.

“This,” Percy said, unironically spinning so everyone could see his outfit, “Is traditional Muggle-wear. As I climb higher in the Ministry’s success ladder, sometimes I have to encounter Muggles, so I must dress accordingly. This particular suit was a gift from one of my many clients.”

He turned to you and you tried to wipe the teasing smile off your face. “Y/n, this is what muggles wear to their jobs, isn’t it?” he asked.

You schooled your features into seriousness. “Oh yes,” you responded, “definitely.”

At that moment, Ron, Harry, Ginny, and Hermione stumbled down the stairs, looking like they had just woken up. Everyone stayed up late last night playing nighttime Quidditch (an especially difficult yet fun game considering the fact that you can’t see the bludgers because of how dark it is).  

Ron froze when he saw Percy standing in the kitchen, his shoes so shiny they were reflecting the kitchen lights into the eyes of anyone who looked at them.

“Bloody hell, what happened to your clothes?” he asked incredulously. Him and Harry shared a look and then burst out in laughter.

Percy’s ears turned pink at the tips as he huffed before sitting down in one of the chairs around the kitchen table. You and Mrs Weasley decorated the center of the table with plate after plate of delicious warm breakfast food. Proud of your hard work, you took off your apron and sat down next to Percy.

Ron sat down next to you as the others joined the table.

“For your information, Ronald, your girlfriend says my clothes are the proper Muggle attire,” Percy said, glaring at his little brother.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Ron responded, his ears turning pink now too.

“How’s Penelope?” you asked Percy before you could let yourself get too caught up in the fact that youreally wanted Ron’s response to that question to be different.

Percy smiled at the mention of his longtime girlfriend, who had been a Prefect at Hogwarts with him. “Oh she’s fantastic,” Percy said before launching into a long-winded story about Penelope’s latest project she was working on at the ministry. Words such as “top-secret” “highly important” and “imperative job” floated past your ears.

Ron leaned closer to you and mumbled in your ear, “I wish you hadn’t asked him that.”

“Me too,” you whispered back, giggling behind your hand.

As breakfast began, you were proud of all the compliments you received on your cooking. Waking up early to cook with Mrs Weasley was a part of the day you always looked forward too, and the compliments only made you feel better about it.

After everyone finished eating, and cleared their plates, chairs scraped against the wood of the floor as everyone prepared to go about their daily business.

“Wait!” Percy shouting, using his wand to spell everyone back into their chairs. “Nobody leave this table until we discuss my birthday party details.”

Theses past few weeks your brain had been so focused on Ron that you had forgotten Percy’s huge birthday party that was taking place at the Burrow next week. From the guilty expressions of everyone else around the table, you could tell they had forgotten too.

“I want this party to be perfect,” Percy said. “My bosses are coming to this party, as is Penelope, so I will not tolerate any shenanigans.” He fixed his eyes on the twins and gave them an icy glare. “I mean it, no funny business.”

Fred and George saluted him, shouting “yes mother” before jumping out of their chairs and running to their room. A memory flashed in your head from the beginning of summer. The twins were showing you fireworks in their room, “special fireworks for Percy’s party” they had said. There was definitely going to be some shenanigans taking place.

Increasingly interested about what kind of pranks the twins were going to pull on Percy, you excused yourself from the table and followed them upstairs. You were about to knock on their door before it swung open and Fred dragged you inside.

“Can I have a sneak peek?” you asked them giddily as soon as the door closed behind you. Apart from the twins, you were the most excited about their funny products and pranks they always pulled. You knew Percy’s party wasn’t going to disappoint.

Instead of reciprocating your excitement, the twins traded nervous glances.

“What is it?” you asked them. You felt a strange sense of deja vu to the time when they picked you up to drive you to the Burrow in the beginning of summer. They were hiding something from you then, and they were certainly hiding something from you now.

“So we take it you’re not going to tell Ron about your unconditional love for him anytime soon?” George asked, rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish expression on his face. Fred was ringing his hands nervously next to him.

“That is correct,” you responded flatly.

“Well, you see,” Fred began, “When we ordered these special fireworks for Percy’s party, we assumed you two would be dating and in love by the time of the party. And the thing is, there’s no refunds on the fireworks, so we kind of have to use them.” He spoke so fast that the words were tumbling together in your head.

“Okay…what does that mean? What do the fireworks have to do with Ron and I?” you asked, getting increasingly more upset by the moment.

The twins must have sensed your anger because they traded a quick glance before assuring you “Okay, never mind, love, everything is under control,” Fred promised.

“Yep, totally under control,” George said, steering you out of the room. You didn’t even register what they were saying before you were standing in the hallway.

“What aren’t you telling me?” you asked, eyes narrowing into a glare at the twins.

They both gulped nervously.

“Don’t worry about it, y/n, everything is fine. Percy’s party will be full of lots of laughs and fun,” Fred promised, before promptly shutting the door in your face. Once again, you got deja vu.

And with that, you left the twins room, feeling even more confused about your relationship with Ron than ever.

                                                                                              …

The next week was frantic, hectic, and insane as you all scrambled to prepare for Percy’s big party. Decorations needed to be made, food needed to be cooked, and you totally forgot to get Percy a present. After a day trip to Diagon Alley, you had returned home with a bag of more owl food for Dite and a magical watch for Percy. Despite all of the high energy and excitement in the house, the twins words still weighed on you. The party was quickly approaching and you had yet to “confess your unconditional love” to Ron. What would happen if you didn’t? You didn’t even want to think about it.

It was the night before Percy’s party, and you were in the garden helping Bill string up lights around the outdoor tables. You and Bill had been spending a lot more time together over the past week. Bill had always opted to help you in whatever decoration or cooking you were tasked with for that day. Although you could tell that made Ron grumpy, you tried to ignore it. Your feelings were confusing enough without trying to unpack Ron’s jealousy at the moment.

You wobbled on the chair you were standing on as you tied the last string of lights around the nearest tree branch. After you finished, you put your hands on your hips and took a look around the garden. It looked amazing. 10 tables were arranged in a neat circle around the yard, completed with white table clothes and centerpieces with Percy’s photo in the middle. You bought a couple packs of muggle Christmas lights to hang from the trees to illuminate the area, which Mr Weasley was very happy about. He spent about 2 hours asking you about the mechanics behind muggle electricity.

There was a long table for the buffet to be served at and a short circular table for Percy’s gifts to be placed on. At the corner of the garden the twins had set up a firing booth for the fireworks. To be totally honest, the decoration fit more for a wedding than a birthday party, but Percy wanted things to be perfect, so the family followed his decoration ideas to a tee.

While being distracted by observing your handiwork, you weren’t really paying attention to what was happening behind you. This was unfortunate because Harry and Ron were practicing disarming charms right behind you.

“Y/n, look out!” you heard someone yell behind you. Whipping around towards the voice, you saw a red ball of sparks sailing towards you from the end of Harry’s wand. How did Harry always manage to accidentally attack you?

You dove from your chair to avoid the sparks, and were fully expecting to land roughy in the grass. Instead, you felt strong arms wrap around you to prevent you from hitting the ground. You looked up to see none other than Bill Weasley as your knight in shining armour.

“Thanks,” you said quietly.

Bill didn’t let his arms drop from around you.

“Anytime,” he replied with a grin. His arms were still wrapped around you when you heard angry footsteps marching towards you.

“Get your hands off her, you prat,” you heard Ron’s voice say. Bill’s arms dropped from your sides as you both turned to face Ron.

“Calm down, Ron,” Bill told him.

Ron glared at his older brother. “Stop flirting with her, she’s my best friend,” he said sternly.

Your heart hurt. You wanted Ron to be jealous because he liked you, not because you were just his best friend.

“He can flirt with me if he wants.” The words were out of your mouth before you could even filter it.

Ron’s gaze snapped towards you and you almost had to take a step back from their intensity.  "Do you want him to?“ He asked you, his voice strained.

The answer was easy. No. You knew you didn’t want Bill to flirt with you. He had been your first crush and he was beyond attractive, but he wasn’t Ron. The only person you wanted was Ron. You said those words not because you wanted Bill, but because you wanted Ron to stop acting possessive if he didn’t even love you back. It just hurt too much for him to act like your boyfriend if he was never going to be.

"Ron, I’m sorry,” Bill said, mediating the situation. “I know you and y/n have something together, I shouldn’t have overstepped. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”

It won’t happen again.

That’s exactly what Ron told you after the night he had taken the love potion. The night that made you believe that maybe he did have the same feelings for you. But in the end, he regretted the moment that you had loved so much.

It won’t happen again.

Tears crowded your vision and you tried your best to blink them away, you were not about to cry in front of him and show him just how much power he had over you and your emotions. But soon there were hot tears slipping down your cheeks and there was nothing you could do to stop it.

Bill and Harry exchanged nervous glances as you and Ron just continued staring at each other. They both took a couple steps away to give you and Ron the space you needed to hash things out. Ron was breathing heavily, obviously still angry from the flirting between you and his brother. But you were angry too, angry that he didn’t want you the way you wanted him.

“I don’t want you flirting with my brother,” he said, his intense gaze never leaving yours.

You rolled your eyes, “It’s not your choice if I do.”

Ron bristled at your comment, taking another step closer to you. You could practically feel the heat and anger radiating off of him.

“You know, you’ve really been pissing me off these past couple weeks,” he said. “You prance around making breakfast in the mornings, but in reality all you’re doing is trying to get with Bill. It’s so fucking frustrating! I’m your best friend, we were supposed to be together every day you visited, but instead you found someone better to spend your time with.”

God, he was thick.  You told him that.

“I’m not trying to get with Bill, you dumb git!” you shouted back. Why couldn’t he see that he was the only one you wanted. Bill hadn’t even crossed your mind this summer, your heart was too full of Ron as it is.

At this point, you were practically nose to nose with him, your shouting words bringing you closer and closer towards each other.

Ron mimicked you from earlier and rolled his eyes. It was beyond infuriating. You set your jaw and clenched your hands as you tried not to yell more.

“Oh of course you’re not. You just spend every waking moment with him and barely hang out with me, but sure you’re not trying to get with him,” he said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

Now it was your turn to get angry. “Oh really? I’m the one to blame right now?” You shouted at him. The words were hot rolling off your tongue.

“You’re the one who treats me so poorly! You cuddle me in your bed, and then run out the next morning. You almost kiss me and then act like it didn’t happen! You told me what happened in your room was a mistake,” the last sentence flew out of you, the anger just boiling and boiling up towards your breaking point.

Even though you knew it wouldn’t do you any good, you kept talking. “Don’t you dare try to put blame on me for this summer going to shit, because it’s not my fault Ron! It’s not my fault you’re jealous of Bill, it’s not my fault things aren’t the same between us, and it’s not my fault you don’t love me back!”

Both of you froze as the words left your mouth. You wanted Ron to say something, needed him to say something, but he remained silent. You couldn’t read his emotions and it was going to drive you crazy.

Ron stared at you, his eyes full to the brim with turbulent emotions that you couldn’t read. All he did was shake his head.

“I don’t want you with Bill,” he finally said.

“You’re not my boyfriend! You’ve made that perfectly clear!” You shouted back, your voice cracking halfway through the sentence.

Ron raked his hands through his messy hair, obvious frustrated. “If I were your boyfriend…” he started. “If I were your boyfriend… I wouldn’t….” He glanced up at you and the words stopped forming at his mouth. You had tear streaks on your face and your eyes were still watery. The look of you must have shaken him too much for him to continue speaking.

“But you’re fucking not! So stop acting like you are, because it hurts too much,” you responded, all the fire gone from your argument. Instead it was replaced with a sad silence, the only sounds were the rustle in the tree branches and your occasional sniffle.

“I never meant to hurt you,” he said, taking a step closer with his hand out to you, almost like he was thinking of reaching out to you.

You couldn’t do this. You couldn’t stay there, letting him reach out to touch you. It was clear he didn’t love you back, so you couldn’t stay and let him hold you when there wasn’t any hope. You backed away from him, shaking your head as tears continued to fall down your cheeks.

“You did. You do,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. If not for Ron’s body suddenly becoming stiff, you would have thought he didn’t hear you.

“Y/n, please…” he began, but no words followed. You shook your head again before turning and running back inside to the Burrow.

Nobody moved when you entered the dimly lit house. The family was sitting around the crackling fire, chatting with one another. But all talk stopped as soon as you entered.

Hastily wiping the tears from your eyes, you tried to make yourself presentable.

“Sweetheart,” Mrs Weasley said with that loving tone of hers only a mother could have, “are you alright?”

You nodded, despite the fact that you knew none of them believed you.

“I’m just a little tired is all, I think I’m going to head up to bed,” you said, before climbing the stairs as quickly as possible.

As soon as you entered your makeshift room in the attic, you slammed the door shut behind you. You couldn’t even make it to the bed before you crumbled onto the ground, your back pressed against the door. Drawing your knees up to your chest, you buried your head in your arms and let yourself cry.

Sobs racked your body as you replayed the conversation from outside. Ron didn’t want you. He didn’t love you back. He was angry and jealous, but he still didn’t love you back.

You stayed there, pressed against the door for the next hour. Everyone headed up to bed at some point and Hermione and Ginny came to check on you. They explained how Harry told them about what happened outside but you just asked them to let you be alone for now. Being the good friends they are, they listened to your request, but not before Ginny promised to “beat Ron to a pulp for hurting you” the next morning.

Even Harry came to check on you. He was visibly uncomfortable, crying girls were never his strong suit (as you could remember from his first kiss with Cho Chang) but he still managed to give you a comforting hug. You thanked him and he left almost as quickly as he arrived.

You got ready for bed in a trance, your eyes now swollen from the crying. Slipping on your pajamas, you barely noticed you were throwing on the vintage band shirt Ron had gotten you for a gift earlier. This only made you cry more. Dite landed on your shoulder as you lay in your bed. She affectionately pecked your ear and nuzzled her feathers against your cheek.  

“I’m okay, Dite,” you told her, petting her soft feathers. Your fingers traced the black heart on her head. Ron bought you an owl named Aphrodite, with a heart literally on her feathers, but he couldn’t even tell you he loved you. These mixed signals made your head and heart both throb.

You fell asleep fitfully, waking up every couple of hours and tossing and turning in bed. Tomorrow was Percy’s party, and you had to be okay for it. You couldn’t let Ron know just how much he had hurt you. You would be fine tomorrow. You would be fine, just like you had been these past few weeks. You would be fine.