funnytwittertweets:

Embrace ur inner fool <3

안녕하세요 슈갑니다.

Hello. I am Suga.

저는 네모나지요.

I am a square.

Trans cr; Mary & Kel @ bts-trans
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@hitmanb 이건 제가 안 했습니다.. 만우절이라 그런 게 아니고 이건 석진이형이 확실합니다.

@/hitmanb I didn’t do this.. it’s not because it’s April Fools’, I’m certain this is Seokjinie hyung.

Trans cr; Mary @ bts-trans
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대한민국 남바완!!!! 가수 SOPE

Republic of South Korea’s Number One!!!! Singers SOPE  

Trans cr; Denise @ bts-trans
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여보세요..?

Hello..?

(T/N: Pun on the word for “prawn/새우” and when greeting someone on the phone = “hello/여보세요”.)

Trans cr; Denise @ bts-trans
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GMM2146

We Spent $1,000,000 at the Dollar Store

A Mess of a Prank (Asahi)

• Genre: Fluff, friendship, slice of life
• Word Count: 2,674
• Pairing: Reader, Asahi
• World: Treasure
• Note: Happy April Fool’s day ya fools.

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Today was April Fool’s day, the day of insane pranks and dank memes. You had always been fascinated by the holiday but never got to participate simply because the people around you didn’t handle jokes well and you had no skills to pull them off successfully, either. So, you settled each year for just watching people prank each other online instead, reblogging them as if you were somehow part of the joke. But this year? This year you were determined to prank someone. You spent hours going through your contacts trying to choose a victim, but there was only one that you felt comfortable enough with to prank.

Your best friend, Asahi.

He had put up with a lot of shit since becoming your friend and you felt confident that he wouldn’t get upset over a silly little prank. You also worried that he might see it coming since he was a smart cookie, but you chose to ignore that worry and got to work setting your plan in motion.

You climbed out of the car, looking up at the giant Hobby Logic sign that sat above the store in orange letters. It was early in the morning and the store had only just opened, so there were very few people inside. You stepped in after a woman and her young daughter, glancing around for your friend. You found her near the back of the store, straightening up the wall of pipe cleaners.

You tapped her shoulder. “Excuse me.”

“Yes? How can I he -” she turned around, a customer service smile on her lips. She blinked when she realized it was you. “Y/N? What are you doing here?”

You clicked your tongue. “Is that any way to speak to a customer?”

She rolled her eyes, turning back to the pipe cleaners. “Considering you’re not a morning person and I can’t believe you’re up so early, I don’t think you are a customer. Maybe you’re a ghost or a demon.”

“How rude,” you huffed, smacking her shoulder. “I’ll have you know, I have a really important mission to accomplish today.”

She paused, realizing what day it was and she looked at you suspiciously. “Why? What are you planning?”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to prank you. I do need you to direct me toward the confetti, though.”

“Aisle eight.”

“Brilliant, thank you!” You gave her a wave before heading toward aisle eight. Rows of colorful glitter in plastic tubes lined the shelves, followed by colorful confetti in plastic bags. They started out small, the size of sandwich bags, and they grew all the way into bags that reached your waist. You spent a good five minutes staring at the bags, trying to decide on how much you would need and, more importantly, what color you should choose.

“You’re so indecisive, I swear.”

You glanced at Naomi as she approached you, straightening the apron around her waist with the store’s logo on it. “It’s an important decision. If I choose too little, I’ll have to come back but if I choose too much, I’ll have leftover confetti with no use for it. Then there’s the color which can determine the mood of the prank. If I go for something bright, it might be too noticeable but if I choose something dark, it might make the prank lose some of its humor and seem more serious.”

She deadpanned. “You put way too much thought into this.”

“It’s my first prank since I was a kid, of course, I did.”

“Just choose blue. It’s a fairly neutral color.”

“You don’t think it’ll be too noticeable?”

She hummed, pointing toward a darker blue. “This one here is royal blue. It’s lighter than navy blue but it’s still dark enough to not draw too much attention. I recommend that one.”

You leaned closer to the bag she was pointing at and nodded. “It’s a nice color… but how much should I get?”

“I don’t know what the prank is so I can’t help you there.”

You turned to her but she held her hand up to stop you.

“And I don’t want to know. If you get arrested, I want no part of it.”

“You’re supposed to be my ride or die,” you frowned, earning a look.

“I am, but I draw the line at jail. I’ve got to get to work, hurry up and choose something before people start complaining about the weirdo staring at confetti for twenty minutes.”

You watched her disappear from the aisle before looking at the confetti, a frown on your lips. For the color Naomi had chosen, there were only three options – the tiny sandwich bag size, one that was just a bit bigger, and a giant bag that sat on the top shelf. You did some quick calculations on your phone and realized that it would be more expensive to buy a bunch of tiny bags than it would be to just get the big bag. You got on your tiptoes, leaning on the shelf to try and reach the giant bag at the top but the shelf was too high and the tip of your finger just barely brushed the plastic.

You put your foot on the bottom shelf, testing it to see if it could hold your weight and it seemed somewhat stable. You’d just have to be fast about it, that’s all. In one swift motion, you pulled yourself up the shelves, fingers curling around the plastic but a cry left your lips when your foot slipped and you fell backward, your ass hitting the linoleum floor and the bag of confetti landing on top of you. You winced in pain, rubbing at your hip. ‘Well, that could have gone better… but it also could have gone worse!’

Shaking your head, you pulled yourself to your feet, feeling a sharp pain go up your back when you did so. You were fairly sure it was going to bruise and be sore for a while, but it wasn’t anything serious. The bag was even bigger now that you held it in front of you and, sitting on the ground, it reached your waist. Would you really need this much? You doubted it, but you would be saving money regardless. You grabbed the bag, thankful that confetti wasn’t heavy, and headed for the front of the store to wait in line. Since there were only a few customers, Naomi was the only one at the cash register.

When you placed the large bag on the counter, she looked at you as if you had just murdered an entire family. She took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Y/N…”

“Yes, bestie?”

“Don’t you think this is a bit… excessive?”

“Not really,” you shrugged. “Why? Do you?”

“Yes!”

“Don’t exaggerate,” you waved her off, pulling your wallet out. “This is gonna be epic.”

Once she rang up the item, she sent you a look. “I’m serious, Y/N, don’t call me from prison.”

“You never support me,” you stuck your tongue out at her, taking the bag and carrying it under your under.

She just shook her head, watching you leave the store.

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You stood in the living room, looking up at the ceiling fan with a frown. It was a lot higher than you thought it was and you weren’t sure you’d be able to reach it but not for lack of trying. First, you tried standing on the coffee table but it wasn’t even close. Then you tried using a stool from the kitchen and, despite being taller than the table, you still couldn’t reach it. Your frown deepened as you looked around your apartment, looking for anything that could boost you up enough to reach the fan – the only thing sturdy enough was your dresser.

After clearing the items off the top, you took a breath and pushed your back against the side, pushing it with all your might. It screeched loudly against the wooden floor and it took a lot more effort than you thought it would to get it into the living room, especially since the living room had carpet instead of wood flooring, but you completed your task. You set the bag on the dresser before climbing up and reaching for the fan only to start coughing at the thick layer of dust and cat hair that coated the wood.

‘Jesus, when was the last time this was cleaned?’ you waved your hand in front of you and coughed again. You were sure you had cleaned it at least once in the two years you had been living there but there was so much dust that it seemed as if it hadn’t been cleaned in eight years. With a huff, you climbed back down to get cleaning supplies. Twenty minutes later, the fan was mostly spotless and ready for the confetti. The problem is that the confetti didn’t like to stack up and kept sliding off, fluttering to the ground. Would a thin layer be enough? It would have to be.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you paused, tugging it from your pocket. It was a new message from Asahi.

[Asachan || Hey. What are you up to?]

You smiled. [Trying to relax :3 how’s practice?] Putting the last of the confetti on the fan, you slid off the dresser and winced as pain went through your hip. And you still had to move the dresser back. Shaking your head, you put your phone on top of the dresser before beginning to push the dresser, but you got it right in front of the hall before you groaned, out of energy.

[Asachan || It’s going well. I like this choreo.]

Before you could reply, he sent another message.

[Asachan || Are you gonna stop by the studio today?]

You glanced up at the fan. [Sorry, I can’t today.]

[Asachan || Why not?]

You hummed as you looked at the empty message box. What should you say? You needed him to come home for the prank but you doubted he would stop by after practicing all day. Your hip throbbed and it was like a light bulb went off above your head. You could ask him to bring you meds for the pain! [I hurt my hip today When practice ends, can you bring me some pain meds? Please~ Asachan?]

A minute passed, then two, then five, and no reply came through. ‘He must have gone back to practice,’ you shrugged, setting your phone down on the dresser before sealing the confetti bag and placing it in the hallway closet. You tried to move the dresser again but pain shot through your back and you groaned, letting your upper body slump across the dresser. The wood was cool against your cheek which felt good since the room was heating up without the fan turned on. You pulled yourself up until you were lying across the dresser, using your arms as a pillow.

Before you knew it, you were asleep and not even your buzzing phone could wake you as message after message came through from a worried Asahi.

[Asachan || How did you hurt your hip? What happened?]

[Asachan || Y/N? Are you okay?]

[Asachan || This isn’t funny, Y/N. Answer me.]

[Asachan || If this is an April Fool’s prank, I’m deleting your number.]

[Asachan || I’m on my way.]

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Asahi was out of breath by the time he reached your apartment door, his heart hammering with worry. You still hadn’t responded to any of his messages or calls. He wanted to leave practice as soon as you stopped replying but his manager wouldn’t let him and his members convinced him to wait a bit, saying that you might have just gotten busy or distracted but after a few hours passed and you refused to reply, he finally got his manager to agree to let him go.

He knocked on the door, holding himself back because it was getting late and he didn’t want to disturb your neighbors. The sound roused you from your sleep and you lifted your head in confusion, rubbing at your eyes. It took you a minute to realize that the sound was coming from the door and you started to push yourself off the dresser but your back locked up from the terrible sleeping position and the earlier accident and you fell off the dresser, hitting the ground with a soft groan.

When you didn’t answer, he tried the doorknob, finding it unlocked. How many times had he told you to keep the door locked? You never listened to him. With his heart pounding in his ears, he turned the knob and stepped into the apartment. The lights were off, the room dark without the sun to cast light through the window. He flicked the light switch beside the door, bathing the room in light.

You winced at the sudden bright light, peering your head over the top of the dresser to see who had just entered your apartment but you got a face full of confetti as the fan kicked on at its highest speed, sending the little blue pieces of plastic all over the room like a confetti tornado. You sputtered when a piece went into your mouth.

Asahi blinked in confusion, looking up at the fan to try and discover why it was snowing blue in your apartment but then he remembered your message and he frowned, eyes snapping to you. “Y/N.”

Your eyes met his as you slowly pulled yourself up, giving him a sheepish smile. “Hi…”

His eyes raked over your body, searching for any physical sign of injury but he found none. “What’s going on? Why didn’t you reply to my messages? Are you okay?”

“Breathe, Asahi,” you laughed, shaking your head to get rid of the confetti that was still falling from the fan. You held your arms out. “April Fools…!”

His brow furrowed. “So you’re not hurt?”

“I mean, I did hurt my hip when I fell at the store this morning,” you put your hand on your lower back, feeling the ache there like you had just had a bad night’s sleep. “Or maybe it’s my back. I’m not sure, the whole area is kinda sore.”

“Why didn’t you answer me?”

“I waited a bit for your reply and then I fell asleep. I’m sorry!” You put your hands together in front of you and he sighed, running his hand through his blonde hair, sending a mess of confetti to the floor and earning you a confused look. “Yeah… about that. Happy April fool’s day?”

“Was this your plan the whole time?” his lips twitched up.

“Maybe. It would have gone better if I hadn’t fallen asleep…”

“You pranked yourself, Y/N.”

“Eh? How?”

He motioned toward the room and you glanced around, finally noticing just how much of a mess had been made. The confetti had gone everywhere.

“Crap, I have to clean this up.”

“Mhm,” Asahi smiled softly, resting his hand on top of your head. “I’ll help you.”

“That’s not necessary! You practiced all day and I did this to myself like you said.” You took a breath. “I made my bed and now I must lie in it.”

“I can’t let my best friend suffer alone,” he stated, kneeling down so he could start gathering the confetti into a pile.

You smiled warmly, kneeling beside him and throwing your arms around his shoulders. “Thank you, Asachan.”

He picked up a handful of confetti and tossed it at you, amusement dancing in his eyes.

“Yah, that’s not cleaning.”

He grabbed another handful, raising a challenging brow.

“Asahi, don’t you dare -“

He tossed it at you again and you let out a battle cry, tackling him to the ground. Your laughter mingled with his as the two of you wrestled, ruining the small pile he had made. Your prank may have failed, but you still considered it to be a good day.

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