#bad dad joke
The Bard’s College offered a course on yodelling. They asked the participants to wait in an orderly orderly queue.
The Nords are right to call Orcs milk drinkers.
They love their oricalcium.
Never be afraid to ask your boss for a raise.
Unless they are a necromancer.
One’s boss fired one the other day.
They were a pyromancer.
Why do vampires prefer feeding on narcissists?
They are so vein.
Werewolves tend to be extremely pessimistic.
They refuse to see the silver lining.
Vivec’s favourite film is Mary Poppins.
He is particularly fond of the song “Chim Chim Cher-ee”
Bosmer owned companies are a nightmare to work for. Far too many branch managers.
What do you call a band of all Orisimer?
An orchestra.
Did you hear about the horse made entirely vegetables? It’s a unique corn.
What do you call a gang of witches in a hot spring?
A self cleaning coven.
There once was an Imperial knight who lived through all kind of ills. He fell from a tower in full armour without so much as broken bone. He took a mage to the head without feeling a thing. He was speared by a Dremora and lived to tell the tale.
Truly, it seems there is nothing that can end the life of Sir Vive.
Why does Dunmer music sound better by candlelight?
You can shove the wax in your ears.
An Altmer mage was asked by one of the Jarls of Skyrim what he thought of Nordic culture. The mage paused a moment to think, and then solemnly replied, “I think it would be a good idea.”
What currency do wights use?
Cryptocurrency.
Why do fishermen make good wizards?
They already know how to cast.
Spriggans are not the most intelligent of creatures. They often find themselves stumped.
A thief stole all one’s candles and lanterns.
Frankly, one was delighted.
There are many drawbacks to being an archer.
The ancient Nords would build narrows for kings, priests, and great warriors. Personally, one thinks the common people urned it more.
An entrepreneur from Riften has launched a business offering places to stay for visitors.
They call it Air Bee N Barb.
