#englishstudies
after months of anxiously waiting and overthinking, i finally got the grade for my BA thesis i submitted in september! and it’s much better than i expected, i almost can’t believe it… your girl is very happy now!
i miss uni.
i miss actually going there. waking up early, biking through the morning cold and walking across campus to get to my seminar. or perhaps having to set out a a bit earlier because i need to drop off some books or print my notes. i miss the crowded hallways and getting out of breath climbing up to the fourth floor twice a day. i miss bumping into people i know and chatting with them for a few minutes while we snack, going for lunch and sitting way too long in the canteen. i miss having to eat in front of the lecture halls because the dining hall is too full, and waiting too long in the cafeteria to buy my favourite cookie inbetween classes, only to go running back. i miss sitting next to someone in class. i miss raising my hand, the small talk before the lecture starts and staying a bit longer after. i even miss my heavy backpack and professors opening the windows even when it’s cold outside.
the “i still haven’t done this” and “i don’t really understand this either”. casually going to the library, sitting next to my friends, each of us working on something else. having friends meet me at the cafeteria for a coffee because i need a break from essay writing. the back and forth between campus, library and faculty and the conversations with whomever decided to walk with me.
of course there will be time when i get out of uni and start working and none of this will be part of my everyday life. i just didn’t expect that it would happen now, at the end of my bachelor’s and beginning of master’s. i wish i could go back a year to tell myself to enjoy the mundane, the seemingly meaningless moments that i would now give everything for.
first week of the new (in person) semester is behind me now, it was exhausting! but glad to be back
there’s just something about it being late august, the sky being grey for days, contrasting with the still vibrantly green trees reminding me of summer. the sound of rain and cold breeze creeping in through the open windows, relicts of the warm evenings.
