#gen z quotes
Student: “Man how the f*ck are we leaving lunch already?! We’ve only been in this b**ch for ten minutes!”
Student 1, talking to the teacher: “Hey Coach if I leave, mark me present please! I cannot do this today.”
Teacher, while turning to write on the board: “Truancy! That’s illegal you know.”
Student 1, whispering to Student 2: “Text me if he marks me absent.”
*Student 2 nods while Student 1 leaves*
*a few minutes pass before the Teacher turns around, then sighs*
Teacher, asking student 2: “Did [student 1] really just leave while I had my back turned?”
Student 2, shrugging: “I’m not sure. I was answering the warm-up.”
Teacher:“That’s a very diplomatic answer. Well…if she’s not back I will mark her absent.”
Student 2, now texting Student 1: “He’s going to mark you absent.”
*few minutes pass*
Student 1, enters the class while panting: “I was in the bathroom.”
Teacher, laughing: “Sure you were. Totally believable.”
Teacher via Google Classroom: “Rubber ducky pass needs to return if anyone wants to go anywhere. No one goes ANYWHERE until the duck is back.”
Teacher: “Well, think of how many of your classmates would qualify to be AI techs.”
Student, pauses before laughing out the word:“No.”
Student 1: “You’re a fuckboy, I fuck boys, we are not the same.””
Student 2: “Oh, that’s GAY!”
english teacher, trying to inspire us:
“English is a language of words.”
i’d sure hope so?
“Excuse me I’m motherfucking Dracula when it comes to writing”
- my friend Kate.
The English teacher overheard us and causally said “I think you mean Bram Stoker.” And I nearly had a heart attack
*more than 2 people speak in zoom*
*my bitchass zoom freezes up*
me: y'all bitches broke my zoom
Bees <3
Our long term sub introducing herself: hi my name is Miss Shank. A kid in the back: was that your prison name?
“If you can’t breathe, yes you can.”
random kid: isn’t it weird how there are like, no old teachers in this school? everybody’s in their 20s or 30s, where are the old people?
other kid: well maybe there were and they had to… be suddenly replaced
first kid: the teachers died???
other kid: possibly
Update!! Hank is wagging his tail and the vet says he’s getting better! we’re still $9,310 from our goal but we still raised $690 so far so thank you to everyone who’s donated or is planning to!! Here’s a little update pic and the gofundme link!!
Hey guys this isn’t a normal post but my dog had to have surgery last night. A mass ruptured on his speed and now he’s internally bleeding. I know it’s close to the holidays but even a dollar helps! Thank you all so much!!
“Okay I feel your vibes, but you have to tell me what your favorite mafia is!”
dude I spend 9 hours at a high school 5 days a week you are going to get so sick of me
submitted by @hopefullyharvard
Me and my friend, while doing a worksheet about the first colonies in a separate room from the main classroom: *talking about armpit hair for some unknown reason*
Teachers aid, from the other room: ”THE FIRST SETTLERS DID NOT HAVE ARMPITS, FOCUS ON YOUR WORK”
When we were about 12 one of my classmates tried to lick a frozen lamppost (it was winter) to see if his tongue would stick like it does in cartoons. Guess what - it did. He spent 30 minutes stuck to the pole until we finally found our teacher who poured hot tea on his tongue to melt it off the lamppost. Still one of the funniest moments of middle school ever
“jfk isn’t dead! he just has a headache :/”
the freshman across the hall said this while we were having lunch. whole room full of students immediately went silent & stared at these 14-year-olds and they didn’t even notice
Some Random Kid In My Class: How can I legally get away with murder?
My Criminology Teacher: Alright, listen up you little shits, technically encouraging murder could potentially make me an accomplice so you’re all going to forget we ever had this little talk, capiche?
The Class: Sure
My Criminology Teacher: *Pulls out a huge book from under his desk as well as a journal and then launches into a lengthy lecture about murder and the legal loopholes involved*
So yeah, I’m now officially afraid of him and 98% sure he’s killed someone at some point
…oops
so uuuuuh kinda abandoned this account after saying I wouldn’t? Sorry guysssss, I have a bad habit of starting things and not finishing them, especially something like this while I’m working and attending a university.
I think I’m gonna queue some submissions up (starting from the like oldest so if you see your submission from like a year ago… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ oops)
aaaanywaayyyy…sorry again but happy halloween!!! (if you celebrate)
feel free to share what you’re being this year (my friends and I are doing Coraline and i’m Wybie)
ok byeeeeeee :)
“HEY THIS REMINDS ME OF A YAOI HENTAI I SAW”
