Aaaaas we had the choice to do anything for today, it was small “remix” of lyrics of a song I prepared a long time ago about how Gwyn was feeling about the necklace situation. It’s tune is the same as this song -
Here are the lyrics :
He told me that he loved my at the toppest mountain. He told me that he loved me and he didn’t love Elain. And that was really lovely cause it was innocent. But now he’s got a cup with something else in it.
It’s getting kinda blurry at a quarter past ten. And he was in the hurry to be touching her skin. He’s feeling kind of dirty when he’s dancing with Elain. Forgetting what he told me by the toppest mountain.
Now he’s grabbing her hips, and pulling her in. Kissing her lips, and whispering in her ear and he knows that he shouldn’t but he still does it. He knows he should’ve been with me at the top of the mountain.
He couldn’t be at home in the night time because. It made him feel alone and at that time he was alone, he was alone. I wasn’t there with him at the mountain for once. And I regret it with so much but there’s not a thing I can do now, nothing I can do now.
But if he ever goes back to the toppest mountain. Our house, it will be broken and there’s nothing in it. My hands would never be able to rebuilt it, But my heart, it will be open and i’ll try to give it.
Now he’s grabbing my hips. And pulling me in. Kissing my lips, and whispering in my ear and I know that it’s only a wish, and that he’d always fall for a girl like Elain.
Gwynriel are mates, we know it; you know it, shut up.
I really want this song to be sung by Gwynriel at their mating ceremony cause it’s just so amazing. It expresses their love in a beautiful way and I just want them to be both mesmerised by each other’s voices
I really do want the necklace to cause some problems cause I love me some drama. Though Gwyn is an unproblematic queen, she will not take shit such as being regifted a rejected gift. She will straight out not talk to Azriel and make him work for her forgiveness. And Azriel who’s unknowingly in love with Gwyn, doesn’t know what’s making him seek for her forgiveness but he doesn’t give up until he gets it.
2. Going to Velaris :
I honestly want Az to be the first one to take Gwyn to Velaris. I just want him to be amazed by her happiness, cause it’s contagious. I also think Gwyn would choose him to take her as she wants to make progress, but she doesn’t want to make a big deal out of it.
3. Defeating Koschei :
I do think that SJM is gonna sideline feysand and nessian in the next book, especially feysand as they’ve already gotten two books. I think that she would make gwynriel the main protagonists as our spies would make an amazing team and would definitely be able to defeat a death lord.
4. Mating Ceremony :
Gwynriel’s mating ceremony is gonna have only the important members of Velaris present. And we all know that their hands are gonna be bonded together by the ribbon that Gwyn cut through during training
5. Gwynriel Kids :
I don’t think so they’ll be having kids anytime soon but if they do, I’m confused of what gender they’ll be. Gwyn gives of an amazing Boy mom vibes but I feel like Azriel secretly wants a girl more cause he would protect her with all his life and he would be an amazing dad to her.
So that’s it folks, those are my future Gwynriel theories. I hope you like em’.
Gwynriel Week Day 4 - Hero x Villain AU : Guilty Pleasure
Synopsis : Gwynriel modern hero x villain au, in which Gwyn is a hero and Azriel is the villain. They both like each other but would never admit it. But when Azriel found out Gwyn’s secret, his cold heart melted for her but raged to destroy those who caused her that pain. Would Gwyn let him help her or not? A oneshot with fluff and comfort.
Azriel and Gwyn had been fighting for about an hour. Azriel knew something was wrong the moment Gwyn stepped into the alley. He also knew what it was. He’d been there to witness it.
“I can keep you safe. They’re all afraid of me,” Azriel supposed, with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.
“No,” Gwyn replied in an instant, while still sitting on the ground staring at her red knuckles on her right hand, completely bruised from their fight.
Azriel sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Why do you have to be so stubborn,” he grumbled as he sat on the bare road with her, taking his knife out of the inner pocket of his black suit.. and started cleaning Gwyn’s hand with it.
“I’m not stubborn,” Gwyn replied but her voice was small, scared, unlike the fearful and dangerous valkyrie he knew.
Azriel continued, ignoring Gwyn’s obvious lie, “I broke my rules for you, I’m breaking them right now, doesn’t that mean anything?”
Gwyn scoffed and rolled her eyes in the way he loved, and said dramatically, “Oh I so hoped that I’d be the one you break your rules for my prince.”
A small smile graced Azriel’s lips at Gwyn’s retort. He loved her little retorts, her laugh, her smile and basically everything she did. She was the only guilty pleasure he allowed himself to enjoy.
But he reminded himself of what they were talking about, and the smile fell from his face. “They couldn’t protect you,” he whispered, forcing her teal eyes to look in his.
Their faces were so close that if one of them moved an inch, their lips would touch. They both wanted to move that inch.
Azriel tugged a strand of Gwyn’s auburn hair behind her ear and held her neck and uttered, “You save everyone, but who saves you?”
A tear passed from Gwyn’s eyes as she said, “I don’t deserve to be saved.”
Azriel lightly kissed Gwyn’s forehead and touches his forehead with hers. “If you don’t deserve to be saved, then I don’t think anyone in this world does.”
Gwyn looks at his hands still holding his and just couldn’t help but trusting him, even if he’s the most wanted villain in the world.
Gwyn smiled sadly and concluded, “Your hands are scarred from murder, and yet I completely trust them.”
Azriel let the words sink in his heart. His bones. His skin. And at that moment he knew, that he wouldn’t be able to survive if anything hurt her ever again.
“Gwyn,” he gulped. “Do you think I’d let anything happen to you?”
Gwyn looked into his eyes with hope in hers, “No,” she lamented. “You wouldn’t.”
“Then let me keep you safe. Be my partner. We could be the best team this world has ever seen. And nothing would ever hurt you, again,” Azriel said the words in a hurry, contempt that he’d finally said them after months of thinking.
Gwyn grinned and asked, “How many times have you practiced saying that to me?”
A tint of pink crept up Azriel’s cheeks, “Thinking of you is a poison I drink often.”
“I thought you didn’t need to resort to poetry?” Gwyn smirked.
“For you I’d do anything.” Azriel said with a small smile.
Gwyn sucked in a long breath. She was silent for god knows how long. But then she released that breath and said, “Yes.”
Azriel’s eyebrows shot up to his forehead.
“I’ll be your partner.” And without letting Azriel reply, she pressed her lips against his.
Chapter Synopsis : Gwyn and Az simping for each other. It’s a slow burn people y’all are gonna have to wait, a lot. I’m gonna give you breadcrumbs. ✨✨But dw we get some action…in the next chapter.
————————
Gwyn looked away from his capturing gaze. “Nothing,” she wiped her eyes. “just a bad day,” she lied.
Azriel wanted to push her further. Gwyn wanted someone to push her further. She wanted to tell someone what she was feeling.
I wanted to ask more.
I wanted to tell you.
Gwyn slowly got up and Azriel stopped leaning on her. Immediately feeling the disappointment when Gwyn’s scent wasn’t clouding his senses.
Gwyn just looked down at her hands and started fidgeting with them, playing with her non existent nails. A habit of hers she employed when she was nervous.
Why are you nervous?
I should stop being nervous.
Gwyn took a deep breath in and mumbled, “What are we doing Az?”
Azriel was surprised by the boldness of her question. He knew it was coming, it was only the matter of when.
Azriel sighed and ran his hand through his head.
Say something.
I don’t know what to say.
“Az,” Gwyn whispered, her voice so low that if Azriel wasn’t fae he wouldn’t have been able to hear her. She still wouldn’t look him in the eyes.
Look at me please.
“I want you to touch me.” She said, her voice not hesitating.
Azriel tried to hide his emotions but couldn’t help widening his eyes a bit. He tried to think but his mind was completely blank. But he wanted to know if his definition of touching was the same as hers?
“Do you mean like touch you touch you or just touch you?” Azriel spoke rapidly.
I’ve never said so many words in a sentence.
I’ve never heard him speak so much in one go.
Gwyn finally looked up, a small blush on her cheeks and a small smile on her face.
I made her blush.
I made her smile.
I made her blush.
I made her smile.
The words repeated themselves in Azriel’s mind, and they soothed him, calmed him. A grin broke out of Azriel’s face, the tension now non-existent.
Azriel raised his eyebrow in an almost comical way. “So what’s it gonna be valkyrie?”
And Gwyn chuckled. He could see her trying to hide her smile and blush but loved the fact that she failed.
But then she looked upto him like the brave valkyrie she was, and smirked, “I just want you to touch me shadowsinger. Run your hands all over my body, you know. Touch my ass, my breasts, anything you want. If you’re able to fathom some control, I’d like to be dressed, for now.”
Azriel was surprised by the boldness of her words, but he was never to back down from a challenge. “So shall we get started valkyrie?
I’m not gonna give any synopsis, or topics, y’all are gonna have to read the entire thing . I’ll just give an emoji and let y’all guess what it’s about. Thank you all for being fellow Gwynriels btw >3
———————
Gwyn had never been happier. He was gonna meet her family today. He was gonna meet her family today.
Gwyn knew that he really wasn’t a people person, but she knew she had to introduce him to her family cause it’s been a year since they’d been together and she still hadn’t told her family about him.
She had just told them who they’d be meeting today, and they had agreed though they were very reluctant at first. Her family was very loving, especially cause she was the youngest one, and the heir to their mafia.
Catrin had immediately declined the offer of becoming the mafia queen as she was much more interested in politics. She lived in USA but had especially come to England to meet the person Gwyn had wanted them to meet so much.
Gwyn was smiling to herself in the mirror, thinking about all these things when a hand crawled around her waste, and Azriel nuzzled his head in her neck.
Gwyn’s smile grew even wider. “Hey ugly,” and Azriel smiled against Gwyn’s neck. He used to call her that when they weren’t in a relationship, when they used to absolutely hate each other.
Gwyn still couldn’t believe that they had evolved that much, that their relationship had. “Hey.” Azriel said, and Gwyn knew he was tired.
Gwyn pursued her lips and asked, “Rough day at work?” And Azriel mumbled a ‘yes’.
“Do you wanna eat anything?” “No,” and that was enough to let Gwyn know that someone had been killed today.
Gwyn turned towards him and kissed him on the lips, it was soft but enough to convey that Gwyn was there for him. “Let’s sleep?” And Azriel nodded sleepily.
Gwyn took his hand and brought him to the bed, they both went in the covers and and hugged each other tightly.
Gwyn wrapped her legs around his and tucked her neck under his. Azriel kissed her hair and played with it, twirling it around his fingers. Gwyn was falling asleep by him gently massaging her hair, “I love you Gwyn” He mumbled into her hair, and Gwyn knew it was the first time that he’d ever said that. She wanted to tell him that she too loved him, but sleep took a hold of her before she could.
—————
When Gwyn woke up the next morning, his side of the bed was cold. Gwyn looked around and found a note on her bedside table.
See you tonight,
Love, the ugliest guy you’ve ever seen.
Gwyn smiled at the note and got up. She spent the rest of the day reading a book and got ready to meet her family at dinner. She really hoped her family would accept him, though she would understand if they didn’t cause he was the head of their biggest rival mafia.
Gwyn got ready and drove to her parent’s house. She thought she had gotten there very early, but that wasn’t the case.
As soon as she saw the dead guards, she ran inside the house. When she entered the dining room, Azriel was sitting at the head of the table, instead of her father. With his white shirt and hands bloody.
Gwyn looked around and didn’t believe her eyes. Her entire family, sitting on the chairs, with a hole between their eyes.
Her sister had marks on her neck, she was strangled before she was killed.
Her mom’s plate had eyeballs in them, she was blinded before she was killed.
Her father, her father, her father, her father.
My dad. My dad. My dad. My dad.
He didn’t even have a face. His entire head was on his plate. His neck bare of a top. He was beheaded and they still had the audacity to put a hole in his head.
Gwyn’s voice froze in her neck. She wanted to choke on air. She wanted to die.
They died because of me.
They died because of me.
They died because of me.
Azriel licked the bloody knife and smirked. Gwyn realized that it was not the smirk she had come to love and admire. It was the smirk of a murderer who betrayed people.
Gwyn’s shaking hand took out the gun strapped to her thigh. And pointed it at Azriel’s head.
“They warned me about you,” Gwyn’s voice wavered and broke.
She wanted to cry she wanted to cry but she couldn’t she wouldn’t but it’s too hard it’s too hard and Gwyn could no longer hold in her tears so she broke, like she always did for him.
———————
Kill me. Kill me. Kill me.
Azriel silently begged Gwyn in his life. He didn’t want to live after being the reason Gwyn broke down.
He knew she was broken by this because if she wasn’t, she would have picked up her Gun and killed him on the spot.
He knew he had broken her. He had to. He kept telling himself that but everytime he did it kept becoming less true.
Gwyn was still gripping the gun with both her hands and crying when she said, “They warned me about you. They warned me about you. They warned be about you.” She kept repeating the words to herself and Azriel kept begging her in her mind.
Kill me.
I want to kill you but I can’t.
Gwyn asked in between sobs after lowering her gun down, “Why?” And Azriel smiled evilly, he was disgusted with himself. He wanted to die.
“I’m glad you asked love. Your family killed my mother, I was just repaying the favour.” And he kept repeating the words to himself, he kept trying to find reasons to justify his actions but he couldn’t he couldn’t he couldn’t.
Gwyn looked at him for a second before a flash of realization flickered on her face. It was small but there. Azriel became a bit hopeful.
She’s gonna forgive me.
I’m never gonna forgive you.
Gwyn shot him in the shoulder. And Azriel let his confusion show on his face.
No sign of sadness was on Gwyn’s face now, only hate. Her voice dripped with venom when she said, “My family never killed Rose Salvatore. The royals did. My family took the blame as a way to create an agreement between our mafia and theirs.”
It was all for nothing. He lost the love of his life for nothing. The pain in his heart was much more than the pain in his shoulders.
So, for the first time in his life, Azriel let his tears drop in front of someone else. Gwyn’s eyes were filled with tears and she let them drop as well. No one made a sound.
Gwyn walked up to Azriel. She was shaking frantically. He knew she didn’t want to do it. He knew what she was gonna do and he knew it would ruin her life. He couldn’t let her live with that guilt.
So he made it easier for her, “Go ahead,” he sneered, broken and bloody.
I love you
I love you
I love you
“Pull the trigger. Isn’t that what you want?” He pushed her further.
I’m sorry
I’m sorry
I’m sorry
“Break my heart again.”
And Gwyn looked at him with horror on her face.
I can’t believe you.
I can’t believe you.
I can’t believe you.
“I told you I’ll kill everyone you love.” And Azriel knew that was her triggering point.
Gwyn pointed the gun to his chest and touched her forehead with his, she wiped his tears with her other hand. “You forgot one.”
With tears in her eyes, she shot the bullet through his chest, and Azriel died with a grateful smile on his face.
I’ve hit the big time. Twitter E*riels are mocking my headcanons
E*riels shitting on my headcanons for uplifting Gwyn, an SA survivor who conquered her fears.
E*riels shitting on my headcanons for praising mutual respect in a relationship
E*riels shitting on my headcanons because we ship two different relationships for different reasons
I ship Gwynriel because I’m a fan of a person who doesn’t need rescuing and I like the idea of Azriel empowering someone rather than protecting them for once
They ship E*riel because they like the soft aesthetic and they appreciate the protective mate behavior (and no shade — I used to ship it too so I understand)
Anyway, this is just rude. And kind of childish. I actually make a point not to attack E*riels for why they ship their ship. I only fight back when I see them saying Gwynriel won’t work because Gwyn is an SA survivor.
If anyone wants the list with context and all the points she left out
Im so sorry you had to go through this shitty situation. I still cannot believe that they’re attacking what actual people write . I really hope you don’t get discouraged by this childish behaviour of theirs. We all from the Gwynriel fandom love you and support you. And we are the most thankful and grateful for your amazing headcanons.
I’d just like to point out 3 very cute things in which i think Gwynriel are literally opposites
1. Waking Up in the morning :
Gwyn is a morning person. You cannot tell me that this woman is not a morning person. She will literally be a soccor mom when gwynriel have a kid. She will be the one preparing cookies for everyone in the class to help her kid make friends.
Azriel on the other hand is really not a morning person. He would rather sleep in and cuddle with Gwyn. However, on each and every special day, he would be the one to get up early because gdd he loves making surprises for her. He’d admire her for a good hour before getting up though.
2. Eating
My bestie Gwyn is a total foodie. If she has not eaten anything for breakfast you DO NOT wanna come in her way. She has extreme taste buds. She wants something that is either too spicy (for others) or too sweet. She gives me desi/latina vibes here.
Azriel on the other hand does not like spicy food. He loves pies and chocolates. But unlike Gwyn, who only likes chocolate flavour in literally every dessert, Azriel likes a variety of flavours.
3. Movies
Gwyn absolutely loves cheesy old romantic movies. She is totally a hopeless romantic and I just know she likes the weird ass netflix movies. However she also loves a good thriller and action movies and series like Money Heist and Squid Game. However, her favourite has to be a classic comedy series like F.R.I.E.N.D.S.orHIMYMorB99.
One word. Horror. Azriel loves horror movies. He loves the thrill of them. He loves that sometimes they scare him. He also loves thriller movies however absolutely hates romantic movies (unless its a classic one like Titanic. Istg gwyn and Az would be watching it and he would just be fangirling over the cinematography and the way it has been shot. Same with Euphoria (it’s not romantic but it is drama)) also he would make fun of most of the rom com movies and annoy gwyn. He will literally ruin them for her by telling her the mistakes. Tho gwyn hates it, she has a good time with him cause he always makes her laugh.
Sooo that’s the post people, I hope you like it <3
Chapter Synopsis : What actually had happened with Gwyn, what went so wrong? Find out now.
———————
“What’s wrong love?” Azriel forced her gaze to meet his strong one.
Gwyn had never noticed until that moment that his eyes weren’t dark brown, they were hazel. They had swirls of gold around his iris, and they were clear as day but clouded at the same time.
Gwyn could see her reflection in his eyes, I look pathetic, wasthe first thought that came in her mind.
Pathetic.
Gwyn still remembered the scolding she had gotten from Merill not more than 30 minutes ago.
Gwyn had simply been working, minding her own business peacefully while translating the thousand year old work for Merill’s journal.
She was exhausted. She knew it. She was tired from practicing in the morning and training till the evening. Cassian had taught her this new method that she still wasn’t able to grasp.
But finally, after 8 hours of training, she had mastered that technique. She felt proud at the moment, but the next second her body collapse, and she felt the exhaustion dawn on her.
She hadn’t felt the pain while training because she was too focused on it. But now that pain was throbbing through her body and threatened it to shut down.
Even now, Gwyn’s body was begging her to do the work in her bed, cause the hard wood of the chair was killing her ass, and she was sure that she was gonna get cramps.
Her head felt heavy. Rest. Her brain begged her.
But she knew that Merill was gonna
Gwyn knew the pain was not going to let her focus on the work she was doing. So she agreed with to her body’s demands and laid her head down on the table. The coolness of it comforting her.
Just for five minutes.
Gwyn was woken by Merill eating her ear off.
The moment she heard Merill’s voice, she stood up straight.
“OF COURE, OF COURSE the useless priestess would love to fall asleep. Why are you even working for me Gwyneth? I could find someone much more useful than you. Why are you even here, pretending to work? It’s not even 7pm and you’re falling asleep. I wish I could say I was disappointed but I never expected anything from you. You are a disgrace to this library. People work their arses off here. You don’t deserve to live here. Your room could be occupied by someone who actually deserves to and is hard working. Look at your head, your hair, do you not have any manners?”
Gwyn tried to speak, “Merill I’m really sorry, I was just really exhausted today and-”
Merill scoffed and interrupted, “Excuses! All excuses! It must be in your nymph heritage to not work and simply rest. But then it was bound to happen wasn’t it? You were a mistake, everyone knows that. No low life nymph was supposed to mingle with a high fae. Your grandmother was pathetic, your mother was pathetic, you are pathetic.”
Gwyn was taken aback. She felt tears prickling her eyes. She would not cry. She would not cry.
I am the rock against which the surface crashes, nothing can break me.
She chanted the phrase in her head like a mantra but it didn’t give her the courage that she needed. It didn’t give her the courage to speak as Merill slammed the table with her books and walked away.
Gwyn sprinted to her room like a little child and slammed the door behind her. Not being able to hold her tears anymore, she went straight to the bathroom and muffled her mouth with her hand as she cried.
A/N : Sorry for the late posting, I have my exams and I forgot
“Azriel, are you listening?” Mor’s voice cut through Azriel’s daydream, drawing him back to the scene in front of him. He blinked, nodding at Mor before turning to whoever had been speaking. Lucien shot him an amused look across the table, turning back to Jurian as the other male explained something that Azriel immediately forgot.
He was seated at a dining table with Mor, Vassa, Jurian and Lucien in the Archeron’s old estate, attempting to finish a somewhat early dinner. Vassa and Jurian were bickering about some political ideology that Azriel had no interest in, which had led to him drifting off into more pleasant thoughts. Ones that involved a rather attractive priestess riding his thigh and making the most gorgeous sounds he’d ever heard in his life.
“Tell me, Shadowsinger,” Vassa suddenly addressed him, snapping his attention back to the table. He met the redheads sultry gaze, his own face schooled into an emotionless facade. “What has you looking so dreamy? Distract me. I’ve grown tired of our current entertainment.”
“You weren’t saying that last night,” Jurian muttered, snatching an apple from the table. Lucien rolled his eyes, giving Azriel a knowing look behind Vassa’s back.
“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Azriel quietly responded. Vassa’s flirtatious behavior was slowly becoming expected when he visited the Mortal Lands. She seemed to enjoy flirting just for the sake of it. Unfortunately for her, he was only interested in flirting with one female - and she wasn’t present.
“Hmm, that’s too bad,” Vassa whined, pouting her full lips and ignoring Jurian’s dramatic eye roll. “I was hoping you might come play with me. I have a feeling you’re much more adventurous than the men I’m surrounded with.”
Azriel smirked, noting the slight flare of jealousy in Jurian’s eyes as the human male silently watched the proceedings. Lucien chugged his wine, seeming used to the game of cat and mouse his two friends were playing. Azriel leaned conspiratorially across the table toward Vassa, turning his eyes to the female while Mor hid a smile behind her wine glass.
His shadows kept a close watch on Jurian, making sure the male wasn’t going to leap across the table and attempt to throttle Azriel. Vassa went still, her breath becoming uneven as Azriel slowly shifted from cold and emotionless to warm and seductive. If she wanted to play games, he would play games.
“What did you have in mind?” He drawled, his smirk growing when her eyes darted over him appreciatively, then over to Jurian and back again. She leaned forward, lowering her voice as though they were the only two in the room.
“I was thinking something that might involve you and your shadows,” she whispered, the two of them ignoring the angry huff from Jurian down the table. “I’m sure they like to play as much as you do.”
“Mmm, you’re right, they do,” he purred with a sensual smile, holding her gaze for a long moment before abruptly sitting back in his chair, all traces of seduction instantly disappearing. “But, like their master, my shadows have very specific taste and I’m not sure I currently see anything that fits the description.”
Vassa blanched, smacking Jurian on the back of the head when he burst into laughter. Mor quietly giggled next to him, daintily picking at a piece of fruit in front of her. Lucien chuckled softly, taking a long sip of wine before pushing his plate away from him.
“And what exactly is that description?” Vassa shot at him, crossing her arms in frustration as Jurian continued to cackle. Azriel opened his mouth to respond, but, to his surprise, Lucien beat him to it.
“I believe Azriel, and his shadows, tend to prefer things with teal eyes, a generous amount of freckles, long legs and a decided love of knives and books,” Lucien mused, addressing Vassa but looking at Azriel in amusement. “Or something like that, I would think.”
“Yes, something like that,” Azriel agreed, flashing Lucien a genuine smile while Mor grinned in delight. Lucien returned the friendly look, then pushed back from the table, cutting Vassa off from whatever she was about to say.
“Well, I think it’s time I show Mor and Azriel the area they will be stationing their spies at,” Lucien announced, straightening his jacket before striding to the door. Azriel and Mor followed, saying quick goodbyes to Jurian and Vassa, who were already back to bickering, then rushing out the door.
Mor let out a dramatic sigh, bumping her shoulder with Azriel as Lucien led them outside and away from the estate grounds. “I thought that meal would never end,” she whined, tucking her thick cloak tighter around her body in the chill autumn air. “Are they always like that?”
Lucien glanced behind him, giving Mor an apologetic smile. “Yes, they are,” he said, heading toward a narrow, wooded path in front of him. “They like to constantly be at odds for some reason. I don’t mind it most of the time, but it can be exhausting.”
Azriel chuckled, stepping behind Mor as they entered the wooded area. He had seen this area on the maps Lucien had presented to him, and when he had flown over for an initial inspection, but this was the first time he had walked the area his spies would be stationed. Tonight, once darkness set in, they would begin monitoring the area for the suspicious activity Lucien had noted.
“So, are you ever going to tell us who you suspect?” Azriel bluntly asked. Lucien had been oddly secretive about it, but Azriel could tell the other male knew something. His shadows darted out in front of them, scanning the forest as they walked.
Lucien paused underneath a small, shaded clearing and turned to Azriel and Mor. Lucien fell silent, seeming to contemplate how much he was willing to reveal.
“Before I tell you anything, I need to know something, and I am trusting Morrigan to confirm the truth of it,” Lucien said, staring at Azriel with a hardness he rarely demonstrated. Azriel silently nodded for Lucien to go on, tensing at his sudden change of mood. “I don’t need, nor do I want, details, but I need to know if you still have any involvement with Elain. And please don’t lie to me. I’m not blind.”
Azriel blinked, confused by the course of the conversation. He knew Lucien was aware of his idiotic infatuation with his mate, but he thought that was in the past. “I’m not involved with her. It’s in the past, but I’ve told you that already.”
Lucien held his gaze, then looked to Mor. She nodded in confirmation, her eyes darting between the two males. At her nod, Lucien’s shoulders sagged and he let out a long breath, uncharacteristically ruffled.
“Good, that makes this easier,” Lucien said, turning his attention back to Azriel. “I’m sorry for being so blunt. I know we have discussed this before, but I had to be absolutely certain we were on the same page. This could deeply affect her, if my suspicions are correct.”
“What do you mean?” Azriel pressed when Lucien went quiet, anxiously wringing his hands. All the defensiveness faded, centuries of spy training kicking in.
“Well, as I told you before, we suspect foul play,” Lucien began, his voice hushed in the quiet woods. “At first, the mortals in the area seemed receptive to the idea of building bridges with us, but now, they seem to be echoing the same antagonistic arguments that the Mortal Queens keep spreading. The louder ones, the ones with power, it’s like they’re mindless. And the rest…well, they seem too scared to go against them.”
“That sounds like what’s happening in Vallahan,” Mor muttered, glancing at Azriel with a frown. “Treaty negotiations had improved, then I left for a few days and everything fell apart again. I can’t even get an invite with any of the lords there now.”
“Yes, that’s exactly how it happened here as well,” Lucien agreed, his hands fidgeting in agitation. “We had been on the verge of drafting a new treaty, then the conflict with Nesta and Briallyn happened, and I was away for a few days and everything went to hell. Jurian even said…”
Lucien fell quiet, his fingers absently reaching toward the scar on his face. Azriel’s senses heightened, a tight coil of dread building in his stomach.
“What did Jurian say?” Azriel pushed, hands fisted at his side. Lucien looked at him, his lips spread in a thin line, eyes filled with sadness.
“He said it reminded him of what happened with Amarantha,” Lucien finally explained with a frown. “That it was like some of the mortals had stopped thinking for themselves. Vassa confirmed it, and I saw as much when I came back after visiting Velaris.”
Azriel let out a long breath, his eyes shuttering for a moment before he forced himself to face Lucien again. Mor was utterly still beside him, fear obvious on her face.
“What does this have to do with needing spies here?” Azriel asked, his voice hollow. After a short moment, he added. “And Elain? What does it have to do with her?”
“Take a guess which mortal family doesn’t seem to have lost all ability to think on their own,” Lucien sneered, his eyes filling with fire.
“Graysen?” Azriel replied, rolling his shoulders back in frustration. Of course, it would be that bastard. No matter what had happened between him and Elain, Graysen was still a piece of shit.
“That’s the one,” Lucien dryly remarked. “That’s why we relocated to this estate a few months ago. We no longer felt it was safe in the place Graysen’s family had gifted Jurian and Vassa. He and his family have almost entirely shut off communication with us. Their reasoning is that we can’t be trusted.”
“And they can be trusted?” Mor gaped, her red lips twisting into a sneer. “What an asshole.”
Lucien chuckled, but his face remained hard. “Yes, he is,” he nodded, pacing through the small circle. “Since then, I’ve tried to keep tabs on him and I have found him sneaking out regularly. He goes to meet various people, some of which are human, but some…one or two seem to be fae. Although, I haven’t been able to find out for sure because I haven’t been able to get close enough.”
Azriel frowned. “Why would he be meeting with fae? He hates them.”
“Yes, but…they could be offering him something,” Lucien confirmed with a nod. “But…the one time I was able to get close enough to see anything substantial, Graysen had a cloak on that wasn’t his. It had a small crest. When I described it to Vassa, she confirmed that it was the crest of the Mortal Queens.”
“Are you suggesting Graysen is working with them?” Mor whispered fearfully, her face pale. Azriel placed a hand on her back, offering support.
“Yes,” Lucien replied, his brow furrowing. “Or at least, I think it’s highly likely. His behavior is very similar to Beron’s, which is part of the reason Eris has begun visiting so much. I can’t figure out on my own what Graysen is up to, so I am asking for your help.”
Azriel met Lucien’s pleading stare, a muscle in his jaw working as he considered all that he had just learned. If Graysen was indeed working with the Mortal Queens, it was just one more layer to the complicated web that had developed across the sea. If they didn’t start cutting off some of the threads, they would all be caught before they stood a chance at fighting whatever power was toying with them.
“You’ve been keeping secrets, Lucien,” Azriel murmured, watching as Lucien’s shoulders stiffened, his metal eye seeming to look right through Azriel to his very core.
“You’ve kept secrets too, Shadowsinger,” Lucien replied smoothly, not a hint of intimidation in his tone. Good. Azriel didn’t like working with anyone who was quick to back down or who scared easily.
“Fair enough,” Azriel chuckled. “Of course we’ll help you. That’s why we’re here. Besides, I made a promise to be friends with you. I wouldn’t like to see the consequences of breaking that promise.”
Lucien relaxed, a small smile crossing his face even while he looked at Azriel in confusion. Mor mirrored Lucien’s expression, turning to Azriel with one eyebrow raised.
“Gwyn,” he said simply, shrugging his shoulders. Lucien grinned while Mor slowly relaxed next to Azriel, the mood gradually shifting back to normal again. “Is that everything then?”
“Yes, that’s all I know,” Lucien confirmed, glancing back toward the path. “Eris is supposed to meet me at the house soon. Would you like to join us, or would you prefer to continue checking the perimeter we’ve set for your spies?”
Azriel glanced at Mor, who had once again stiffened beside him, then back at Lucien. “We’ll keep walking, if you don’t mind. It might be best if we save a visit with Eris until next time.”
“I agree,” Lucien smiled, his eyes darting to Mor. “You know the trails, so I’ll leave you to it.”
Lucien waved them off, heading in the opposite direction as Azriel and Mor set off farther down the trail. Mor remained quiet for a while, no doubt lost in thought, but eventually she broke the silence, her mood seeming to relax some.
“So, why was Lucien asking you about Elain?” She asked, matching his slow stride. He sighed, knowing there was no way out of this.
He slowly explained everything, telling her what he had told Gwyn a few weeks ago. That he had been involved with Elain, but only to the point of an almost kiss and that was it. He assured her it was in the past, and promised that Gwyn knew everything as well. By the time he had finished, Mor seemed satisfied with his explanation, yet there was something he felt like he was forgetting. Something that was slipping his mind, but he couldn’t figure out what it was.
“Is that everything?” Mor asked when he paused, her normal happy demeanor finally returned.
“Yes, I think so,” he said, frowning slightly. “Although, I have the strangest feeling that I’m forgetting something, only I don’t know what it could be.”
“You’ll think of it eventually,” Mor chirped, her blond hair bouncing as she followed him along the trail. “As long as Gwyn knows everything, then I’m sure it’s fine.”
“Yes, she does,” he assured her, ignoring that nagging feeling. He had told Gwyn everything, hadn’t he?
Mor looked up at him, studying his face before saying, “This might sound harsh, but I’m glad it didn’t work out with Elain.”
“Oh, why?” He chuckled. He was in agreement, but he wanted to know her reasoning.
“Because you aren’t right for each other, anyone could see that,” Mor said matter-of-factly. “You and Gwyn…you’re perfect together.”
He smiled, his shadows dancing excitedly around him at the mention of Gwyn. Even with Mor present, who they normally retreated around to give her space, his shadows couldn’t hide their happiness at the thought of their favorite priestess. Neither could he, for that matter.
“Thank you. She’s…incredible,” Azriel quietly said, a small blush creeping up his neck. He coughed, attempting to clear his throat from the rush of emotions he felt. “You and Emerie are great together too. Are you two doing well?”
“Um, actually, we just had our first fight recently,” Mor admitted shyly, tucking her hands into her cloak. He frowned, unsure if he should question her or not. Their new dynamic was still so fresh, he didn’t want to risk ruining it. Before he could decide, Mor went on.
“Are you and Gwyn serious?” She blurted, her normally perfect complexion going bright red with a blush. “About each other, I mean. Are you two serious about your relationship?”
Azriel slowly nodded, confused. “Yes, of course we’re serious,” he affirmed, studying Mor’s profile. “What else would we be?”
“I don’t know, you could be more casual,” Mor shrugged, avoiding his gaze. “I mean, how do you know you’re serious? Have you talked about it?”
“We don’t need to,” he shook his head, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Gwyn’s not really the type for casual relationships, and I wouldn’t want to be casual with her. I know I want to be with her for as long as she wants me.”
He trailed off, falling silent as he realized that was the first time he had admitted anything like that out loud. He felt a small pang of fear as his feelings slowly sunk in. Was it too soon to feel that much for Gwyn? Would she pull away if he told her that? He didn’t get time to think about it because Mor once again broke the silence.
“You sound so sure,” Mor murmured, sounding oddly nervous. “I wish I could say something like that without being so scared.”
He stopped mid step, forcing Mor to come to a halt in the middle of the trail as he stared at her. Her face was filled with sadness, something he rarely saw in her. He bit his lip, his jaw working as he tried to figure out how to address this.
“Mor, what happened? What’s making you so scared?” He tentatively asked, worried he might say the wrong thing. “You seem head-over-heels for Emerie. I don’t understand what happened.”
“Iam head-over-heels for Emerie,” Mor quietly reassured him. “But…the other day, we were at Rita’s talking to some of my friends and someone asked us about our relationship. I said we were keeping it casual. It just slipped out, I don’t know why. But Emerie got upset about it.”
He ran his hand through his hair, hoping she would explain more. After a moment, to his relief, she did.
“She was hurt that I had said we were casual because she thought we were serious,” Mor whispered, her eyes brimming with tears. “And she’s right, we are. But for some reason, I was scared to say that, even to her. She’s had to deal with so much bullshit because of our relationship, yet I’m too cowardly to say that we’re serious. I’m just scared. I don’t want to lose her, but I’m scared.”
Tears were now fully falling down her face, her arms wrapped around herself as she confessed to him. He felt sick to his stomach, the full weight of how much she had carried with her for so long hitting him. He had played a role in it too, which made it all that much more painful. He was trying to be a better male, but he had failed the one person he owed the most. That ended now.
“Mor, you’re not a coward,” he firmly stated, hesitantly pulling her toward him. She willingly leaned into his touch, allowing him to wrap her in a tight hug. “You are doing your best to figure this out. That’s all you can do. You have every reason to be scared. You just need to tell her that.”
“I haven’t even told my parents about us,” Mor sobbed into his chest, her voice breaking. It felt strange, holding her like this, yet he was glad he could be here for her in some way. “I’ve only told my friends at Rita’s, and the Inner Circle. That’s it.”
“You don’t owe your family an explanation, Mor,” he assured her, lightly stroking her back. “You should only have to tell the people you want to tell. You don’t owe anyone anything.”
“But I want Emerie to know how much she means to me,” Mor whispered, clinging to his leathers. “I don’t want her to think I’m hiding her or that I’m ashamed of her.”
He gently pulled her head back and met her tear-stained gaze. “Then tell her that,” he stated, a muscle in his jaw working furiously. “If anyone else asks, just tell them that you’re in love with the most incredible female and that you don’t give a shit what they think. And if anyone even thinks about attacking you for that, then tell me and it will be the last thing they ever say. All right?”
“Okay,” she slowly nodded, clutching the edge of her cloak. “But…why are you so willing to…to help me? You’ve handled all of this so well. And…I don’t understand why. Honestly, I…I thought you might pull away from me after you found out.”
He swallowed, praying he could find the words to explain how stupid he’d been. “Because I realized that I had been the worst friend to you, and that matters more than anything I felt in the past,” he quietly said. “You’re my family and I love you. It’s different now, or, maybe it always was, but I love you. You deserve to be happy, and I want to help in any way I can. I hurt you and I made you feel unsafe” - he held up a finger when she tried to interrupt - “I did, and I want to fix it. I want to be here for you, the same way you’ve always been there for me. I’m sorry for not being there sooner.”
She stared at him for several moments, blinking tears away, but then she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He almost fell backward from the force of it, but he recovered and slowly hugged her back, waiting until she pulled away to let go.
“Thank you, Azriel,” Mor smiled, brushing away the last of her tears. “I love you too. I’m glad we can just be us now. I want you to be happy as well.”
“I’m glad we can just be us now too,” he gave her a rare grin, rubbing her arm affectionately. “Come on, we should keep walking.”
She nodded, looping her arm through his and beginning to walk down the trail again. If anyone had told him a few centuries ago, or even a year ago, that he would be walking with Mor on his arm and neither one of them would feel any awkwardness or that he wouldn’t feel anything besides brotherly affection, he wouldn’t have believed it. But he was grateful it had happened. He had spent far too long making them both miserable, too blind to see the truth. Finally, they could both move forward and find happiness.
His shadows once again darted in front of them, searching the area as they slowly walked through the woods. Mor leaned against his arm, quiet for a while before she broke the silence, never one to stay quiet for long.
“Azriel, I know I don’t owe them anything, but would you come with me when I tell my parents?” She hesitantly asked. “I want to tell them, but I don’t want it to be a big event. They’ve always made me parade in front of their courtiers for everything, but this time…I want to do it on my terms. It would only be a short trip, just long enough to say what I want to say and then leave, but…I’d like the support, if you’re willing.”
“Of course, I’ll come with you whenever you’re ready,” he promised, knowing he would need to let Gwyn know. Hell, Gwyn might want to join him if he told her why he was going to the Hewn City. “But I think you should talk to Emerie first, before you do anything.”
She softly laughed. “I will,” she assured him, squeezing his arm. “I’ll talk to her when we get back. She said she was fine, but I know it’s still bothering her. I’ll tell her about the Hewn City as well, she’ll probably want to come with us.”
He chuckled. “Probably. I’m sure Gwyn will too, whether I want her to or not.”
Mor playfully poked him in the ribs, laughing as she did so. “You’re awfully relaxed about taking Gwyn to the Court of Nightmares. I figured you would never let Gwyn go.”
“I don’t want her to go, but I know there’s no point arguing about it,” he shrugged, blushing slightly. The darkness had settled around them, the time passing quicker than he had realized. “And I’m not relaxed about it, I just…have a different perspective. That’s all.”
“Mmm, I’m sure I have a certain priestess to thank for that,” Mor said knowingly, tugging her cloak tighter when a breeze picked up. “Hey, that reminds me, your birthday is coming up.”
“Yeah, so?” He shrugged. He usually avoided bringing attention to himself, so birthdays were the opposite of his favorite thing.
“Sooo, I want to plan a party for you this year,” she chirped, practically bouncing in excitement.
He groaned. “Why? You planned a party a few years ago.”
She rolled her eyes, accustomed to his reluctance. “Birthdays happen every year, Az. I just want to do something special. Please let me. I know you don’t like big parties, so I promise I’ll keep it small.”
He sighed, knowing this was a losing battle. “If you can convince Gwyn, then go ahead.”
“Yay! Thank you,” Mor excitedly clapped. She knew as well as he did that Gwyn wouldn’t resist her on this, not as long as Mor kept the party intimate. Gwyn was far too sweet to holdout for long, especially when it came to people she cared about, which meant it was as good as settled.
Another strong breeze pushed past them, bringing a new wave of cold air. Above them storm clouds were brewing, darkening the sky further. Azriel stopped in the middle of the trail, gently turning Mor around to face back toward the estate.
“Come on, it’s going to rain,” he told her, urging her forward with a tug of his arm. “I don’t want to be stuck out here when it’s downpouring, if we can avoid it.”
“I agree,” Mor enthusiastically nodded, picking up her pace to match his. “I’m also craving something sweet since we skipped dessert, so I’m more than ready to go back to the estate, even if I have to listen to Jurian and Vassa bicker.”
He laughed, throwing his head back and letting himself just breathe in the moment. He was missing Gwyn like crazy, but he was happy. Happier than he had ever expected. He had the most amazing female waiting for him at home, and one of his dearest friends walking by his side. What could possibly go wrong?
“Azriel, I told you we should have left earlier,” Gwyn chastised her boyfriend, frowning at the growing piles of snow outside. There was no way they would make it home before the New Year’s Eve party tonight with this weather.
“And I told you that it wouldn’t hurt to stay one more night,” Azriel chuckled, leaning one arm casually against the edge of the window frame. The black knit sweater he wore stretched across his biceps, making Gwyn’s mouth go dry.
She shook her head, banishing the images of Azriel stripping that very same black sweater off of her last night. She didn’t need to be distracted by him right now - not when they were clearly going to be snowed in at this rate.
The snow had been falling all day, but Azriel had kept her busy all morning by repeatedly dragging her back to bed. By the time she had finally decided they needed to leave, or they’d miss Nesta and Cassian’s New Year’s bash, the snow had already begun to pile up.
“Az, we should have left this morning,” Gwyn said again, ignoring his smirk as she stared out the window with worry. “I don’t know why you insisted on staying in bed all day.”
“Because Rhys let us use this cabin so we could spend time alone, since we’ve both been busy all month,” Azriel said simply, pushing off the wall and striding toward the door. “I can’t help it that I missed spending time with you, Gwyneth.”
“Well…when you put it like that,” she huffed, turning away from the window to find him taking off his snow boots. “What are you doing? Az, we’re leaving!”
He shook his head with a chuckle but continued to take off his shoes. “No, we’re not,” he countered, straightening up and stripping off his sweater, leaving him in nothing but his jeans. “The snow is too high. We can let Nesta and everyone else know we’ll be home tomorrow.”
She gaped, caught off guard by the sight of his sculpted chest as he casually sunk onto the sofa, legs spread invitingly as he smirked at her. She felt heat spread between her legs, but she grabbed a nearby throw pillow and tossed it at him to distract herself. He caught it effortlessly, dropping it on the floor before motioning for her to come to him.
“I am not coming over there,” she protested, although she was already unbuttoning her jacket. “I know what will happen if I do, and we are not doing that. We need to go.”
“For someone who doesn’t want to do that, you’re stripping awfully fast, Berdara,” Azriel laughed, watching her shrug off her jacket and quickly take off her own boots. She stuck out her tongue at him, but the expression did little to contradict her actions. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s not safe to drive in this storm, and you know it.”
“Yes, but you don’t have to look so smug about it,” Gwyn argued, still refusing to admit defeat even as she stripped off her pants and sweater, leaving her in a simple pair of bra and panties. She straddled him on the sofa, sighing as he tugged her onto his lap and nestled her against his firm, warm body.
“I’m not smug about the weather,” Azriel insisted, gently stroking his hands along her back. She shivered at the touch, already giving in to his plans for their New Year’s Eve. “I’m smug because I get to spend the night making love to the most incredible woman I’ve ever met, who I happen to love very, very much. So why shouldn’t I be a little smug?”
She slowly smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck as he toyed with the clasp of her bra. “You know, for someone who doesn’t like talking that much, you seem to have a way with words,” she teased him, giving him a chaste kiss. “I love you too.”
He grinned. “Good, or else this would be very awkward,” he murmured, brushing his lips across hers. She smiled, laughing when he suddenly scooped her up and carried her to the bed. “I love you, Gwyn. Happy New Year.”
“Happy New Year,” she whispered, pulling him into a searing kiss, their bodies moving in perfect harmony as they welcomed the new year wrapped in each other’s arms.
Gwyn seeks advice from Nesta and Emerie as her relationship with Azriel progresses.
IMPORTANT NOTE: First, thank you for your patience with this update. I know it’s been a while, but I am happy to be updating again. Going forward, I don’t know how often I will update, so it might be a while, but I will do my best.
Second, I recently did a tag list cleanup. I have removed everyone who did not respond to the post. However, if you simply missed the post and would like to be re-added, please just let me know. Or if I mistakenly kept you on it and you would like to be removed, I can do that as well.
Once again, thank you all for your patience! It is so appreciated. <3
If you would like to be added or removed from the tag list, let me know!
Gwyn woke to the sound of quiet movement near her, the familiar scent of cedar and night-chilled mist filling her senses as she remembered where she was. She kept her eyes closed for several moments, listening to the sounds of Azriel moving around the room while she reveled in the memory of last night.
She still couldn’t believe it was real. It had gone so much better than she had hoped. It felt like a dream, an impossibly perfect dream. Yet, the fact that she was in Azriel’s bed half-naked was proof of the previous night’s activities. It was real; she had finally taken the next step with Azriel. The thought filled her with the most blissful happiness she had ever experienced.
She rolled onto her back, stretching her arms with a lazy smile as she opened her eyes. She looked around her, shimming to lean against the pillows and pulling the sheet up to cover her chest. Azriel met her gaze with a slow grin, grabbing Truth-Teller from his desk before striding back to the bed.
He was already dressed in his leathers despite it being a day with no required training. She wasn’t surprised though. He was supposed to visit the Mortal Realms with Mor for a couple days to finish setting up the patrols he had been planning, as well as to check-in with Lucien. She wished she could go with him, but they had agreed she could go the next time – once things were set in place.
“Good morning,” Azriel drawled, sitting on the edge of the bed and tenderly kissing her cheek. She blushed, clutching the sheet to her as she remembered everything they had done last night. “Did you sleep well?”
“Yes, perfectly,” she replied, goosebumps spreading across her skin when Azriel began gently stroking his fingers along her bare shoulder. He chewed on his bottom lip, his hazel eyes sparkling. She was certain he was remembering their explorations from the previous night as well, which only deepened her blush.
“You should have woken me up,” she chided, trying to distract herself from the pleasant warmth spreading through her. “You know I wanted to say goodbye before you left.”
He met her eyes, his fingers still gliding smoothly across her skin. “I was going to wake you up in a few minutes,” he assured her with a crooked smile. “But you looked so peaceful, so I didn’t want to wake you any sooner than I had to.”
She let out a soft “Oh,” her grip on the sheet loosening as he continued staring at her. Despite her inexperience, she could read his gaze - it was filled with nothing short of outright hunger. And now that she knew the kind of pleasure she could find with him, every inch of her ached to pull him down onto the bed and see what other ways he could bring her to that blissful edge.
Yet, there was a small sliver of hesitation, one she wasn’t sure she was ready to discuss with him yet. She averted her gaze, forcing herself to ignore her insecurities. She would figure out her worries later, for now, she just wanted to enjoy being with him.
“What are your plans for the day?” Azriel asked, his gaze softening. She breathed a sigh of relief. His desire wasn’t what had made her nervous, but she was grateful for the change of topic regardless. Now that they were moving forward, she needed to deal with her fears. And today was a good opportunity for that.
“I’m supposed to go shopping with Emerie and Nesta,” she said, smiling at his shadows as they playfully twirled around her arms. “It was Nesta’s idea, since Cassian is busy today too.”
He hummed quietly, playing with a lock of her hair. “That sounds fun,” he smiled, then added. “Will you be all right though?”
She nodded, catching his meaning. This would be the first time she ventured into the city without him, something she had considered before agreeing to the shopping trip. She would be with her sisters; if something made her anxious, she knew they would understand.
“I’ll be fine,” she reassured him, smoothing the small crease above his brow. “I’m ready to try going out more. I think this will be good for me.”
His fingers brushed along her jaw, gently cupping her face. “Okay, as long as you’re sure. If you need anything, Cassian won’t be too far away, so Nesta can always call him.”
“I know,” she laughed, twining her fingers with his and pulling his hand down to her lap. “Nesta insisted on that already. She made me promise I would tell her if I felt uneasy today. She’s as overprotective as you.”
He chuckled. “We care about you. That’s all,” he said, placing a kiss to the corner of her mouth. “I hope you have a good time, but I’ll miss you while I’m gone.”
“I’ll miss you too,” she agreed, absently stroking his hand with her thumb. “But you’ll be back in a few days, right?”
“Yes, I should return tomorrow night, but it might be really late,” he explained, brow furrowing. “I’m not sure if I’ll be back before you go to bed, so please don’t wait up. You should get some rest.”
She grinned, leaning up to kiss him softly. “I’ll try, but you don’t need to worry so much, Azriel.”
“I know, but I can’t help myself,” he replied, chuckling quietly. “I should probably go. I’m supposed to meet with Rhys before I leave with Mor.”
She smiled in encouragement, turning her face up in anticipation. He smiled at her eagerness, claiming her mouth tenderly, his hands twining in her hair as their lips moved easily together. She could get lost in his kiss, the sensation of his mouth on hers instantly calming her no matter what she was feeling.
He deepened the kiss for a short moment - too short for her liking - then he pulled away with a quiet groan, leaning his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes, savoring his touch before he had to leave. All too soon, he released her, slowly standing up and checking his weapons one last time.
She watched him silently, already missing his warmth. He smiled at her, then headed for the door, pausing only a few steps away before turning back to her.
“Gwyn?”
“Hmm?”
“Um, if you decide to visit that store in Velaris again…” he trailed off, rubbing his neck nervously. She held back a grin, amused by his flustered behavior. “You know, the one with the, uh, underthings?”
“Yes, I know which one you’re talking about,” she giggled, not sure where he was going with this.
“Well, if you go back, there’s an account open for you,” he confessed, meeting her stare anxiously. “I opened it a while ago, just in case you ever went back. You don’t have to, of course, but if you wanted to, then it’s under your name.”
He finally paused, his chest heaving with shaking breaths. She felt a flush creeping up her neck at the thought of the lingerie store he was referring to, but she ignored it, focusing on him instead. She had wanted to go back to that store, but she had never expected Azriel to do something like this for her. It felt so…intimate. He would know if she bought anything, but she would control if he saw her purchases or not.
“Az, thank you. I…you didn’t have to do that,” she said, oddly emotional at his thoughtful gesture. He smiled softly, a flush to match her own coloring his cheeks. Was he imaging how she might look in whatever she bought? The thought made her shiver.
“I know I didn’t have to,” he assured her, his shadows dancing between them. “But I wanted to. Even if I don’t see any of the items you buy, I…I just wanted you to be able to go back whenever you wanted. I liked how happy you were that day.”
He averted his eyes, staring at the floor as his voice grew quieter. It wasn’t often he admitted his emotions so easily, but it always made her heart ache when he did. She gathered the large sheet around her, clutching it to her chest as she hopped off the bed and strode toward him, the sheet trailing behind her.
“Thank you, Azriel,” she whispered, not giving him a chance to respond before pulling him down into a searing kiss. His arms wrapped around her, one hand gripping her backside while the other cradled her neck, tilting her head until he found the angle he wanted.
She let him kiss her for as long as he wanted, opening for him and savoring every second. The sheet slowly fell to the ground, leaving her bare for him, her sensitive nipples peaking at the feeling of his leathers against her skin. But she still didn’t pull away, instead pressing closer to him, showing him with her body how much he meant to her. How much she wanted him.
When he finally pulled away, they were both flustered and breathless. He quickly grabbed the sheet from where she had dropped it, carefully wrapping her up in it and saying goodbye before disappearing through the door. Despite already wishing he would come back, she was grateful he had left so quickly. If he had stayed, she was certain they would have wound up back in bed.
She stood in the middle of the room for several minutes, catching her breath and reeling from his kiss. She slowly got ready for the day, taking her time soaking in his large bathtub, having left some of her personal items in his bedroom the day before. By the time she left his room and set out to find Nesta and Emerie in the house, she realized that she desperately needed to talk to her sisters. There were fears she still hadn’t faced, and Azriel needed to know, especially if they were going to keep exploring like they had last night.
*******************************************
Several hours and countless shopping bags later, mostly courtesy of Nesta, Gwyn found herself in a small cafe somewhere in the middle of Velaris. She plopped down into the nearest chair with a dramatic sigh, laughing when Emerie leaned her head on the table and groaned.
“Oh hush, you two are having fun and you know it,” Nesta teased, sitting next to Gwyn and poking Emerie, who slowly lifted her head and gave a vulgar gesture to Nesta. “There’s only a few more shops I think we should visit, including a bookstore, and then we can call it a day.”
“Fine, but next time…we’re bringing Cassian or Azriel or anyone with bigger arms than me,” Emerie decided, earning a round of giggles from Gwyn and Nesta. A moment later, a waiter appeared and took their orders, then disappeared into the back.
Gwyn fell quiet, listening to her two friends chatter, but she noticed Nesta shoot Emerie a glance a few minutes later. Before she could ask what the two of them were silently thinking, the waiter brought their food and drinks, forcing them to pause the conversation.
They fell into a comfortable silence, all of them too hungry from their busy day to focus on anything other than their food. When they were finished eating and were quietly sipping on their drinks, Nesta looked at Emerie again. Only, this time, the two of them immediately turned toward Gwyn.
She blanched, looking between them in confusion. “What? Is something wrong?”
Emerie shrugged, glancing at Nesta. “You tell us, Gwyn.”
“What do you mean?” Gwyn asked, utterly confused.
“Gwyn, you’ve been rather quiet today,” Nesta noted, putting a hand over Gwyn’s where it rested on the table. “Are you okay? Is everything all right with Azriel?”
“Yes, of course, things are great,” she insisted, not quite understanding why Nesta would ask her that. “Why would you…ohhhhhh.”
She suddenly understood why her silence had worried them so much. They knew she had been planning something with Azriel, they just didn’t know when, and she hadn’t told them how things had gone yet. No wonder they were both looking at her like they were waiting for her to burst into tears.
She covered her face with her hands, embarrassed. Nesta gently pried her hands away, holding them on the table while Emerie reached across the table to squeeze her arm. She took a deep breath, knowing she needed to talk to them now or she never would.
“Nesta, Em, you don’t need to worry,” she promised quietly, blushing fiercely. “Everything with Azriel is perfect. That’s not why I was quiet.”
“Then did something else happen?” Nesta pressed, looking to Emerie for backup. “We were worried because you hadn’t told us what happened with your plans. It’s not like you to be this reserved.”
Emerie nodded in agreement, patiently waiting for Gwyn to explain. She chewed on the inside of her cheek, mulling over her words.
“Our plans worked out well. It was lovely,” Gwyn finally said, clinging to Nesta’s hands for support. “Perfect, really. And that’s the problem. I’m worried about what happens now.”
“What do you mean?” Emerie asked, forehead creasing with concern. “Azriel seems patient, surely he wouldn’t push you into something you’re not okay with. Would he?”
“No, never,” she assured her friend, shaking her head vigorously. “It’s just…” – she shot a furtive glance around the room, then dropped her voice – “I want more, but…I know the types of things that typically happen now involve…penetration of some sort. And it scares me. I don’t want to panic when I’m with him.”
Her voice had become impossibly quiet, embarrassment flooding her. This shouldn’t be so hard. She just wanted to be with Azriel, but every single step they took forward felt like a giant leap that Gwyn couldn’t help but fret about. She just wanted to stop overthinking for once, to let go – like she had last night.
“Oh, honey, it doesn’t have to be that way if you don’t want it to,” Emerie soothed her, leaning forward to stroke her arm in a calming pattern. “And I’m sure he would never make you feel bad if you did get scared while you’re with him.”
“Emerie’s right,” Nesta reassured her, moving one arm to stroke Gwyn’s back. “Azriel would understand. And things don’t necessarily have to involve any kind of penetration. Azriel should know plenty of other ways to make you orgasm.”
Gwyn gaped at Nesta, her blush deepening as she glanced around the cafe again. “Hush, there are other people here,” she whispered, not used to being as open about sex as Nesta was. Emerie giggled, but Nesta just shrugged.
“Sex is a perfectly normal thing to discuss, Gwyn,” Nesta smiled, tugging at her braid. Gwyn rolled her eyes, but laughed, relaxing slightly. “But seriously, if you don’t want to take things in that direction, then you don’t have to.”
“I know, but…” Gwyn sighed, frustrated with herself.
“But what?” Emerie prodded when Gwyn fell silent. Nesta raised an eyebrow in question, silently waiting for Gwyn to continue.
“Iwant to,” she admitted in a soft whisper, her stomach in knots. Emerie and Nesta watched her steadily, waiting for her to elaborate. “I want to take the next steps with Azriel. I want to…let him do those types of things to me. I’m just scared. I haven’t even been able to…to pleasure myself like that.”
Shame and embarrassment roiled inside of her, making her feel sick to her stomach. Nesta took her hands again as Emerie came around the table and firmly hugged her, holding her for a long moment before returning to her seat. Nesta stroked her back with her free hand, tugging Gwyn closer. She leaned into her friends’ touch, needing the support.
“Gwyn, it’s okay. You don’t have to feel embarrassed talking to us,” Emerie finally said, her voice soft. Gwyn met her gaze, her face flushed. “This is what we’re here for. We’re your sisters.”
“I just don’t know how to tell him,” Gwyn choked out, worried she might start crying any moment. “I don’t even know how to tell him what I want, let alone explaining that I’m scared of some of the things I want.”
Nesta sighed, brushing back a stray lock of Gwyn’s hair. “I think you should sit down and tell him what you’ve told us. That would at least be a start.”
Gwyn nodded, knowing her friends were right. The best way to explain to Azriel how she felt was to be blunt about it. There was no use tiptoeing around it, especially now that things had become more heated when they were together.
“How do I explain what I want him to do though?” Gwyn questioned, unsure she understood her own desires. She was so new to this; she constantly felt silly trying to explain things. “He sometimes asks me, like last night, and I barely know how to answer. I need advice. Please.”
“Okay, hold on, this conversation requires cake, I’ll be right back,” Emerie stated, jumping up from the table to retrieve the desired sweet. Gwyn looked to Nesta, hoping her friends would help her.
“Gwyn, if you’re comfortable with it, why don’t you start by telling us what you have done with Azriel?” Nesta suggested, her voice unusually gentle. “I know you haven’t done much, but we can help you better if we know where you’re at with him.”
Gwyn nodded, taking several calming breaths while they waited for Emerie to return. When the cake was acquired and they were all settled around the table again, Gwyn slowly explained as much as she could about what she had done with Azriel the previous night. Her sisters listened quietly, patiently waiting the few times Gwyn had to pause to collect herself when she became flustered.
By the time she was finished, she felt an odd sense of relief. Talking to Nesta and Emerie felt reassuring, like she didn’t have to figure out everything on her own. And she knew Azriel wouldn’t mind. He had said as much several times, and he knew how much comfort she took from speaking with her friends.
“Before I offer any advice, I have to say that I’m a little shocked,” Emerie admitted with wide eyes. “I never expected Azriel to be that romantic.”
“Neither did I, and I live with him,” Nesta agreed, stealing the remainder of Gwyn’s chocolate cake. Gwyn playfully shoved her away, waving her fork at her.
“Well, he is,” Gwyn said coyly, smiling at the memory of last night. Every time she thought about it, she was filled with happy butterflies. “He’s just a private person.”
Nesta and Emerie nodded knowingly, finishing off their cake before addressing Gwyn again.
“Okay, my advice,” Emerie began, folding her hands gracefully in front of her. “I’m not rushing you, but you should try facing your fears and try pleasuring yourself in the way that you’re worried about Azriel pleasuring you.”
“Yes, I agree,” Nesta said, returning to softly rubbing Gwyn’s back. “I know you’re nervous, but if you can do it on your own, then it might not be so scary with him.”
“Exactly,” Emerie nodded, squeezing Gwyn’s hand across the table. “Figure out what you like, then you’ll be able to explain to him what you want. Also, if you want to eventually have sex with him, then you’ll need to ease into it, so this will help.”
Gwyn rolled her shoulders back, mulling over the advice. “Okay, I think I can do that,” she slowly replied, her jaw set in determination. She could do this; she had her friends and Azriel for support. If she got anxious, she could just talk to them about it.
“Anything else?” She asked, staring between her friends. Emerie looked to Nesta, who thought for a moment before replying.
“I think you should try trusting Azriel a little more,” Nesta finally said, bringing a small frown to Gwyn’s lips. What did Nesta mean? She did trust Azriel. She opened her mouth to say as much, but Nesta quickly silenced her, already guessing what she was going to say.
“I know you trust him,” Nesta assured her. “But you keep worrying about how experienced he is instead of using it to your advantage.”
Gwyn raised an eyebrow, her confusion growing when Emerie eagerly nodded in agreement. “What do you mean? I don’t understand.”
“I mean, trust him to know what he’s doing,” Nesta explained, sipping her drink before continuing. “He wants to be with you, and he knows you’re anxious about these things, so let him help you. Let him guide you when you need it. He’s more than experienced enough to know how to make this easier for you. So let him. It’s okay to rely on someone else sometimes, Gwyn.”
Gwyn’s face sagged, a tumult of emotions rolling through her all at once. This is exactly why she had wanted to talk to her sisters; they knew her so well, even when she tried to deny it.
She couldn’t ignore how right Nesta was. She had worried about how experienced Azriel was, constantly fearing that he would think her silly for her lack of experience. Yet he had shown her at every chance that the disparity in their sexual history didn’t bother him. He had been nothing but patient with her, always making sure she felt good no matter what they did. Taking the lead when she asked, figuring out what she liked even when she wasn’t sure herself.
“I…I hadn’t really thought about it that way,” she admitted shyly, toying with the edge of the tablecloth.
“That’s okay,” Nesta consoled her with a squeeze of her shoulders. “Like Emerie said, that’s what we’re here for.”
She slowly smiled, looking between her two friends and thanking the cauldron for bringing them into her life. She still missed her twin, but she knew Catrin would love these two females as much as she did. They were every bit as much her sisters as Catrin was.
“Now, I have a question for you,” Emerie declared, straightening her tunic with a sly smile. Nesta grinned at her, laughing softly as Gwyn waited for Emerie to continue. “We’ve offered advice, but is there anything we can do to help you feel more confident in all of this?”
Gwyn thought for several moments, thinking back on everything they had discussed. Her friends had helped her more than they knew, but perhaps there was one more thing they could do. Something she had wanted to do but wasn’t sure she had the courage for.
“Actually, yes,” Gwyn finally said, meeting Nesta and Emerie’s curious gazes. “Ever since Mor’s birthday, I’ve wanted to go back to this store -”
“The lingerie one?” Nesta gasped, eyes going wide in delight. Gwyn shyly nodded, blushing when Emerie clapped her hands in excitement. “Oh, we can absolutely go there if you want. I was thinking of getting a few new pieces anyway.”
“Are you sure?” Gwyn questioned, wanting to be certain her friends weren’t too tired. “I’m not used to shopping at places like that, so I’m a bit slow making decisions. We don’t have to go.”
“Oh, we’re going,” Emerie insisted, waving her hands at Gwyn. “After the birthday present you gave Mor, I need to see this shop. And knowing you’re going to knock that cocky bat on his ass when he sees you in new lingerie just makes me want to go more.”
Gwyn burst into giggles, doubling over as Nesta began laughing next to her. Emerie grinned with pride, ushering them out of the restaurant while Nesta and Gwyn continued laughing. Gwyn leaned on Emerie, twining their arms together while Nesta led them toward the lingerie shop, the three of them giggling and chatting excitedly.
As they walked through the city, Gwyn felt a little lighter with each step, the advice and support from her sisters giving her the courage to move forward. No matter what happened, she knew she could count on them to be there for her, helping her in whatever way she needed as she ventured into unknown territory with Azriel.
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After eating a slice of pie in the Spring Court, Gwyn finds herself desperate to be closer to Azriel and put an end to their accidental bout of abstinence.
Warnings: NSFW. Very NSFW. Smut. Smuttiness for days.
This is part of the Cherry Pie: ACOTAR Kinktober Smut Extravaganza collection. Make sure to check out the rest of the collection and the other authors!
Gwyn watched Nesta disappear into the Spring Court manor before turning back to the pie tin in front of her with a relieved sigh, settling into the wicker chair she had sat in while she waited for Azriel to return. He had gone to check on some of his spies nearby while she and Nesta had gone around to the patio in search of their party. But no one seemed to be here, which made Gwyn even more annoyed than she already had been.
At least she didn’t have to pretend to be impressed by the gardens anymore. She wasn’t entirely sure why Nesta had insisted they tour them, as Gwyn had never liked perfectly manicured gardens like these ones. She had curated the wild, natural landscape of her and Azriel’s home for that very reason. But she suspected Nesta had simply wanted her to enjoy her first visit to the Spring Court, and she couldn’t begrudge her friend that, even if she would have preferred lounging on the patio the whole time.
As she stared across the moonlit gardens, she forked another bite of cherry pie into her mouth, sighing happily now that she was alone. She didn’t care if she was being rude to her hosts or not. She was starving, and all she wanted to do was go home and beg Azriel to make her pancakes. He made the best pancakes.
She huffed in annoyance, wishing she had refused this dinner invitation like Azriel had suggested. She liked Elain and Lucien, but the timing for this dinner couldn’t have been worse. She and Azriel had been working constantly, getting closer and closer to figuring out the last few causes behind the uprisings in Illyria, with the help of Cassian, Nesta, Emerie and Mor. Which meant they were more than a little worn out, and neither one of them was in the mood for a party.
It had been weeks since they had had a moment to just enjoy each other’s company, work and family obligations forcing them to sacrifice much needed alone time. It had made her far moodier than normal. And Azriel hadn’t been much better. The lack of sleep, and, unfortunately, sex was frustrating them both.
She couldn’t believe she had even hinted at her frustrations to Nesta. There were some things that she simply didn’t tell her friends - even Nesta and Emerie – for their sake and hers. It suited her just fine if they continued thinking she was innocent and shy about certain matters. It left her free to indulge her curiosity with Azriel without facing probing interrogations from her sisters. They would be beside themselves if they knew the things she let Azriel do to her. That she asked him to do to her.
She sighed, brushing her frustration away as she scooped up more pie. It was delightful, the tart cherries contrasting perfectly with the flaky crust. If only it wasn’t so damn hot in the Spring Court, then she could enjoy it more. She lightly fanned herself while savoring another bite, trying to cool herself off. Had it been this warm when they arrived?
“You know it’s rude to eat when you haven’t even greeted your hosts yet, right?” Azriel’s deep, amused voice came from behind her. She whirled around, fork still poised by her mouth, the incriminating remnants of pie lingering on the tip. Azriel’s face spread into a mirthful grin as he approached her, his shadows swirling around him as he crossed the patio and sank into the chair next to her.
“I was hungry,” she said primly, shamelessly pulling the pie tin toward her and scooping up the last bite. Azriel smirked, his eyes narrowing in amusement. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s not my fault no one was here to greet us. Or feed us.”
“Fair enough,” he murmured, draping his arm behind her and absently toying with the thin strap of her flowy, green gown. She shifted in her seat, the heat making her even more distracted than she normally would be at her mate’s touch. Why was she so warm all of a sudden? “Where’s Nesta?”
“Oh, she went upstairs,” Gwyn hummed, setting down her fork and fanning herself. Gods she was hot. She was vaguely aware of Azriel raising his eyebrows at her, but all she could think about was the way he was rubbing her shoulder. Every stroke of his fingers seemed to ignite something in her.
“Nesta made us late to this and now she’s not even here,” Azriel grumbled, his wings flaring slightly in annoyance. “And our hosts aren’t here either. Remind me why we had to come to this dinner again.”
Gwyn remained silent, unable to find the words to respond. She would normally tease him to lessen his sour mood, but her mind was a puddle. There was no denying that there was a distinct warmth spreading between her legs, even though all Azriel had done was touch her shoulder. Her body was on fire – hot, burning desire filling her senses.
She knew they hadn’t had sex in almost two weeks because they had been too busy and tired, but that hardly justified how needy she suddenly felt. She was used to having him gone for a week or more at times, so this was hardly different, even if it had been frustrating. But nothing like this had ever happened to her. She felt positively desperate for him, and she had no idea why.
“Gwyn, are you okay?” Azriel asked, breaking into her hazy thoughts. She met his gaze, her cheeks flushing crimson as she tried to stay calm. His brow was furrowed, the hand on her shoulder squeezing gently. “You seem distracted, Bird.”
“I…I’m fine,” she forced out, clamping her thighs together as she stared at him. He was wearing a simple black tunic and pants, like he often did, but she found herself aching to undress him. To feel his skin on hers. The mere sight of him was making her slip further into whatever this strange haze was. What was happening to her?
Azriel opened his mouth to respond, but his jaw merely sagged open as she found herself reaching for the hem of her skirt, utterly throwing caution to the wind and letting this strange feeling completely take over. Without thinking, she hiked her dress up around her thighs and quickly moved to straddle Azriel, kicking off her shoes in the process. She moved too fast for him to argue, but as she tried to kiss him, he dodged her, staring in confusion.
“Gwyn, honey, I know we haven’t been as intimate as normal, but what the hell are you doing?” He questioned, gripping her waist. She ignored him, pressing her body into his, and sighing when she felt him hardening beneath her. “Gwyneth, did I miss something?”
She blinked, then shook her head before leaning down and kissing his jaw. He didn’t fight her, but he didn’t kiss her back either, which only spurred her on. She peppered his jaw with kisses, working her way down his throat as she reached for the buttons on his shirt. The aching in her body was inescapable, her core throbbing with need. Her earlier frustrations had now been replaced with an entirely different kind of hunger.
“Gwyn, talk to me, please,” Azriel urged, still resolutely refusing to touch her, his shadows swirling around them in thick waves. She kept kissing him, tugging at his shirt impatiently. She needed to feel him, to have his hands on her. “Gwyneth, I’m serious. As much as I’m enjoying this, will you please just…”
She moved to cut him off with a deep kiss, but he suddenly stopped speaking and captured her jaw in his hand, his eyes blazing. She froze, resisting the temptation to rock her hips into his now fully present erection. Azriel just stared at her, holding her face while she gaped in shock.
“Gwyn, show me your tongue please,” Azriel quietly commanded, his shadows deepening. She hesitantly obeyed, her body screaming at her to move against him, to touch herself, to do something. Anything. She just needed relief from the desire-filled haze that had overtaken her.
Azriel let out a deep sigh of frustration as he studied her tongue, then released her jaw, softly stroking her back as if to soothe her. “Gwyn, don’t panic, but that pie was laced with Red Iris powder, a drug used to make people unbearably aroused for roughly 12 hours unless you take the antidote,” he slowly explained, his tone measured. “We need to get you home, love.”
“Why would I panic?” she asked, ignoring his explanation, almost wanting to cry from how potent her arousal had become. She didn’t understand why Azriel seemed so worried. She clearly wasn’t the only one who had eaten the pie, so why did it matter? “How do you even know that?”
“My shadows found a note,” Azriel explained, his tone clipped, revealing just how aggravated he was. “The pie was a gift from Lucien’s parents. It was meant for tomorrow, but clearly things didn’t go as planned. That’s why your tongue is blue.”
“It is not!”
“Yes, it is,” he said firmly, gripping her thighs when she tried wiggling her hips again. She could see the sincerity in his eyes, but she was past the point of caring. The only thing that mattered to her now was getting him to make her cum. “Please just cooperate, Gwyn. If you let me take you home, I can make you the antidote.”
She shook her head and huffed in annoyance, leaning as far away from him as possible while still straddling him. The ache in her core was beyond distracting, but she was even more frustrated by his reaction to it. All she wanted was him, and he was blatantly refusing her because of a pie.
“I don’t want to go home,” she argued petulantly, her irritation growing. “It was just pie, Azriel. I don’t care about some ridiculous aphrodisiac. If you don’t want to have sex with me, then just say it.”
His eyes shot to hers, hot fury lacing his features. “Don’t go there,” he growled, roughly pulling her closer. “This has nothing to do with me not wanting to have sex with you. All I want to do is pleasure you in every possible way because I haven’t gotten to touch you like that in two fucking weeks, Gwyn. You know that.”
“Then take me,” she challenged, attempting to grind against him. The pure need coursing through her was becoming unbearable, the need to orgasm consuming every thought. “I need you, Az. If you really want me, then take me.”
“I can’t! You’re not thinking straight,” he argued, keeping her body still even while she continued trying to find some sort of friction. She let out a strangled sound of frustration, shoving at his chest in exasperation.
“Yes, I am!” She protested, shamelessly reaching a hand between her legs. If he wouldn’t touch her, then she would simply take care of it herself. A scarred hand halted her movements, gripping her wrists and holding them between their bodies.
“Don’t you fucking dare,” he said quietly, a muscle in his jaw working furiously. She could tell she was treading dangerously close to the point of pushing him too far, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She wanted him to lose control. To take her any way he pleased. She was past the point of wanting him to make love to her. She wanted him to fuck her.
“Az, please,” she begged, not bothering to resist his grip. Her mind was too full of her own wicked fantasies to put up much of a fight. “I need you. You can give me the antidote later if you want. I just want you. Please.”
“Gwyneth,” he rumbled, releasing her wrists and leaning back in his chair. She took advantage of her sudden freedom, shamelessly pulling her skirt farther up and rocking her hips into him, a loud moan of relief escaping her. “Fuck, Gwyn. I’m trying to do the right thing, and you’re making it incredibly difficult.”
She leaned down to kiss his jaw again, a tight coil of pleasure already building below her stomach just from the slight friction she was causing. “Then do the right thing and fuck me,” she challenged, trailing a hand up her waist and cupping her breast. “I want you so much, Az. I trust you. Please just touch me.”
He groaned loudly, then grabbed her hips again, taking back control of her movements. “Fine, but I am only doing this on my terms,” he conceded, his tone leaving no room for argument even while the scent of his arousal slowly mixed with hers. “Tell me your safe word.”
“Um…blade. It’s blade,” she reminded him, her heart racing with anticipation. She knew what it meant if he was asking for her safe word, and if she had been standing, her knees would have gone weak. He had very specific plans for her; plans that she was more than willing to let him carry out.
“Good. You won’t need mine tonight,” he assured her, his voice taking on the seductive tone that always made her shiver. “But you have to be quiet for me until I can get you home. We don’t want anyone to find us out here. Okay?”
She nodded quickly, willingly giving him control. Only with him did she ever completely let go. He was her mate; she was safe. Which meant she could let herself fully enjoy every second of this. And gods, she had missed him touching her. Even if it had only been two weeks.
She didn’t have to wait long for relief, as only a moment later he suddenly lifted her off his lap, and then her backside landed on the small metal table in front of them, Azriel’s large body cradled between her thighs. She wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to drag him down for a kiss, but she was once again met with resistance.
She whimpered, her back arching into him slightly. “Az, please, I need you,” she whined, clawing at the buttons of his shirt. He chuckled, but didn’t argue, helping her undo the buttons and quickly shrugging off his shirt. She let out a happy sigh as her hands roamed his chest, but it quickly turned into a moan of relief as his hand trailed up her thigh and hooked on the edge of her panties.
“Remember, if you want this to stop, just say your safe word or scratch my wings,” Azriel said as he slowly dragged her soaked panties down her legs. She lifted her hips for him, her skin flushed even while a cool breeze flicked across her aching center.
She nodded, pulling her dress around her waist to give him better access. He smirked as he finished dragging her panties off and tossed them to the side, his eyes roaming across her exposed center. Before she could beg him to touch her again, his mouth was on hers and his hands were pushing her thighs farther apart, fully spreading her out on the table. She gasped, bucking her hips toward him. He pushed her back down, nipping at her bottom lip as one of his hands cupped her soaked cunt.
His tongue teased her mouth open, claiming her as he palmed her core. She bucked her hips into his hand, moaning and gasping into his mouth. Her nails raked down his back as her legs wrapped around his waist. His free hand slipped behind her neck, angling her the way he wanted. For a small moment, she worried they might be seen by someone, but then his fingers were slipping between her wet folds and she was entirely at his mercy.
She broke away from the kiss, gasping for breath, but he didn’t stop, his mouth only moving down her throat. A cry escaped her as he found her entrance and sunk in two fingers, sliding easily into her. He raised his head with a chuckle, slowly pumping his fingers in and out.
“Shh, you need to be quiet, Sweetheart,” he reminded her, shoving his fingers roughly inside of her. The movement brought another loud moan to her lips, the sound echoing across the patio. He tsked, pulling his fingers out and repeating the same motion. “We’re going to get caught, little bird.”
She bit her lip, trying to hold back a whimper, but failing miserably. “You asshole,” she gasped out, shamelessly grinding her hips up to meet his thrusts. “You like it when I moan for you.”
“Mm, maybe I do,” he murmured, leaning down and nipping at her jaw. “Maybe I want everyone to hear you. To know who’s making you feel like this.”
She opened her mouth to respond, but the only sound that left was a soft sob of pleasure as his thumb came up to her clit and began circling it. His fingers increased their pace, fucking her relentlessly while she moaned and bucked her hips wildly. The pleasure was already beyond intense, her body drawing close to the edge. She clawed at his shoulders, biting her lip to try and stifle the cries flooding from her mouth.
He kept circling her clit, adding pressure as he thrust inside of her, curling his fingers to hit the spot that always made her come undone. As his mouth found hers again, pleasure exploded through her, her orgasm coming on so fast she had no time to prepare herself. She shattered, a scream bubbling up as burning ecstasy washed through her.
Azriel stifled the sound with his mouth, kissing her through her climax to keep her somewhat quiet. His fingers kept working her, drawing out every ounce of pleasure she could handle. Her body shook uncontrollably, her pussy clenching around his fingers while her release slowly eased. He gave her a few more slow thrusts, then removed his hand, pulling his mouth away to watch his fingers slipping out of her.
She watched as he brought his fingers to his mouth and sucked them clean, a small whimper leaving her at the sight. Somehow, despite how strong her climax had been, she was already aching for more, her body still throbbing with need. She clenched her thighs around him, forcing him to lean closer to her again. But he only smirked, dragging a single finger from her entrance to her clit and back again.
“You have to be patient, Sweetheart,” he commanded, gripping her hips and pulling her against him. She gasped, reaching for the buckle on his pants. But he pushed her away, holding her wrists in one large hand. “Not yet, Bird. Tell me what you want first.”
“Fuck me, Az,” she whispered, knowing he liked it when she was very specific with her requests. She could feel how hard he was, and it made her mouth water. “Please. I…I want to feel you inside of me. I want your cock. I just want you to fuck me. Please, Az.”
“Such dirty words from such a pretty mouth,” he smirked, satisfaction blazing in his eyes as he brushed his thumb across her lips. She squirmed in his arms, a fresh wave of heat flooding her. “Hmm, I like the idea of having my cock inside of you, but I don’t think it should be that easy. Do you?”
She trembled, but managed to shake her head, heated anticipation building. Gods, she loved it when he was like this. All demanding and uncontrolled. It made her shiver just thinking about what he would do to her.
“That’s what I thought,” he murmured, finally releasing her wrists. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around his neck, trembling with excitement and desire. “I’m going to take you home, and you’re going to do exactly as I say. And if you’re good, then I might just let you have your way. Okay?”
“Yes, please,” she eagerly nodded, clinging to him, still half naked in his arms. He smiled, his hands gripping her ass, and then he winnowed, plunging them momentarily into darkness.
Only a second later, they reappeared in their seaside home, Azriel’s shadows swirling around them in excited circles. He strode purposefully up the stairs, not bothering to turn on any fae lights as he carried her to their bedroom. Gwyn clung to him, the drug still coursing through her body screaming at her to find release. She was once again overcome with the need to climax, the slight rubbing of Azriel’s bare chest against her clit causing her eyes to flutter shut with pleasure.
Before she could fully process what was happening, she was being set down on the end of their large bed. She tried to pull Azriel down with her, thinking he was going to join her, but he pulled away, leaving her spread out on the bed for him. She gaped at him, not caring that her dress was still bunched around her waist, exposing her.
He smiled at her, walking to the dresser in the corner and pulling out two familiar silky items, along with something that she couldn’t quite see before he tucked it behind his back. As he approached her, she leaned up on her elbows, ignoring the increased wetness between her legs at the sight of the ribbon and blindfold in his hands.
“Stand up,” he demanded, his eyes dropping to her core. She obeyed without question, her normal tendency to tease him fading in the face of her desperate need to orgasm again. Her dress fluttered around her, concealing her core from view, but she knew it wouldn’t take long before Azriel had her undressed and exposed again.
He kissed her softly, brushing her hair back from her face with a smile. Then he carefully slipped the blindfold over her eyes, rendering her completely at his mercy. This wasn’t the first time they had done something like this, but her arousal was almost unbearable, reminding her of the first time they had ever played with ribbons and blindfolds.
“Are you thinking of our mating frenzy?” Azriel quietly asked, sensing the direction of her thoughts. “Are you thinking of that night when I tied you up and fucked you until dawn? Does it make you wet, Sweetheart?”
She weakly nodded, helpless to her own desires. He guided her to where he wanted her, turning her until she was almost sure she was facing the bed, her knees trembling with anticipation and want. She could feel herself almost dripping with arousal, his shadows slowly caressing their way up her legs as she tried to hold still. She felt Azriel’s hands leave her for a moment, but then she felt the familiar cool touch of a blade on her skin.
She shivered, the cold of the metal contrasting with her burning desire. Azriel dragged the blade up her arm, his body just far enough away that she couldn’t quite tell where he was standing. She stood perfectly still, waiting for him to move or say something. But he remained quiet, dragging the blade torturously slow up her arm until she could feel the tip slip beneath the strap of her gown. In one swift motion, one side of her dress suddenly slipped, exposing her breast.
She gasped but managed to remain motionless. Cool air danced across her skin as the blade traveled across her collarbone, slowly gliding under the second strap. A second later, her gown fell to the floor, leaving her completely bare for him.
“I’ll buy you a new dress, love. I promise,” Azriel murmured from next to her, his breath tickling the skin on her shoulder.
“What if I liked that dress?” She questioned; her voice far breathier than she had intended.
He chuckled quietly. “Then I’ll buy you the same one,” he suggested, his hands ghosting up her sides before slowly pulling her arms in front of her. “Tell me now, and we can stop.”
“Keep going,” she demanded, desperate to feel him closer but grateful that he was still making sure she was okay first – as he always did. The normalcy of his actions helped make this strange evening easier, allowing her to fully give in to the irresistible desire she felt.
“Tell me if it’s too tight,” he replied, slipping the ribbon around her wrists. She shifted impatiently in front of him, biting her lip as he expertly knotted the ribbon, forcing her to rely on his help if she wanted to move.
He pulled away, his shadows still softly caressing her. She waited, praying he would start touching her now. His hands drifted to her waist, hovering just above her hips, his thumbs stroking her skin. The wetness between her legs had fully spread across her thighs now, her nipples peaked in the cool air, goosebumps spreading across her body.
She felt his hands pull away, leaving just the tips of his fingers on her skin as she heard him moving. His shadows followed the path of their master, drawing patterns across her body as Azriel slowly traced every inch of her. The movement of his fingers kept her anchored, stopping her from becoming too disoriented. Each stroke of his hands sent shivers down her spine, her chest heaving as he circled her.
His hands drifted dangerously close to her most sensitive areas, teasing her before he pulled away. Each movement of his fingers felt like he was branding her, each touch so sensual, so deliberate that her knees shook from the sheer force of her arousal. Finally, she felt him come to a stop in front of her, his hands resting on her sides, just underneath her breasts.
His lips grazed the shell of her ear. “Kneel,” he commanded, his voice low and rough. She sucked in a breath, her chest heaving.
“I…I need help,” she admitted, wanting to obey him but unsure if she could get on her knees without falling. She already felt unsteady, and the lack of mobility in her arms only made it worse. “Please, Azriel.”
His hands found her elbows, gently guiding her to the floor. She lowered herself without question, trusting him to keep her safe. She felt him kneeling with her, and confusion fluttered in her chest. She had thought he wanted her on her knees for other reasons, but that wouldn’t work if he was on his knees too.
When she was settled on the ground, her breasts jutting out in front of her as she sat back on her heels, he kissed her slowly. She opened for him eagerly, whining softly when he pulled away too quickly. But then his hand was gently pushing her legs apart, his fingers just barely brushing over her slick sex, and she was overcome with need. She was ready to beg if that’s what he wanted her to do, as long as it meant he made her cum.
“Gwyn, I need you to trust me,” he whispered, his hand still hovering between her legs. She felt his other hand slip past her thigh, joining the other underneath her. “I’m going to try something different to try to help take off the edge from the drug. Is that okay?”
She nodded. “Yes, I trust you, Az,” she assured him, her legs shaking. She thought she might faint from how potent her arousal was. It was like being in the mating frenzy again, except she felt like she had no control over her own body, which was far more difficult to handle than the frenzy had been. At least then she had been able to exhibit some restraint when necessary. She was quickly understanding why Azriel had wanted her to take the antidote to this odd drug.
“Keep your legs spread for me, Bird,” Azriel commanded, accepting her answer. She forced herself to pay attention, trying to ignore the desperate clawing of desire that was ripping through her body. “This is going to feel strange, but just stay relaxed.”
She thought about asking what he meant, but she never found the words, the sudden movement of his hands between her legs forcing every thought from her head. A finger circled her entrance, gently entering her before pulling out. But it was quickly replaced with something cold and hard, the mysterious object slipping easily inside of her.
As her inner walls involuntarily clenched around the item, she suddenly realized what it was, a breathless giggle escaping her as Azriel slowly finished putting it inside of her. It was the gift Nesta had jokingly given her for her birthday, a glass sex toy that Nesta had said might be useful for when Azriel was away. Gwyn had never used it, partially from nerves, but mostly because she had grown accustomed to Azriel’s hard warmth inside of her. She thought the toy would feel strange, and she was quickly realizing she had been right.
But gods, did it feel good. It wasn’t quite as large as Azriel, but the odd ridges that ran along the sides of it made up for it. Every time she so much as breathed, it shifted just slightly inside of her, teasing her enough to cause her breathing to turn ragged. But, to her surprise, Azriel didn’t move the toy. Instead, he released his hold on it, his shadows replacing his fingers and holding it in place. She whimpered, quickly growing desperate for Azriel to fuck her with the toy.
To her dismay, she felt him move away from her, leaving her side, the toy still resting in her aching cunt. She whined, her inner walls clenching fruitlessly around the object. His shadows didn’t help, as they kept gently caressing her clit, her breasts, her neck – everywhere.
“Azriel, please, I…gods, please,” she moaned, shifting frantically to try and bounce her hips up and down on the toy. But his shadows kept it in place, denying her the movement she wanted. “Az, I want to cum. Please.”
“Shh, it’s all right,” he assured her, his voice much too far away for her liking. “All you have to do is stay exactly like that for five minutes. Then, if you’re good, I’ll come back and do anything you want me to. Can you do that for me, Sweetheart?”
“Az, I…what?” She stumbled out, the pressure from the toy making her almost dizzy with need. “Where are you going? Are you just going to leave me here?”
“I’ll be back in just a few minutes, Sweetheart.”
And with that, she heard the door open and shut, leaving her alone in the darkness. His shadows remained with her, coaxing small whimpers of pleasure from her as they teased her body. She tried to stay as still as possible, but every second felt like an eternity, the glass toy inside of her a constant reminder of how much she needed to cum. Azriel’s shadows began working her clit, adding pressure to her already throbbing core, her whimpers turning into moans.
But she still couldn’t find enough friction to climax, the shadows keeping her release just out of reach. She wanted to scream in frustration, the blindfold keeping her from knowing how much time had passed. Her safe word floated through her head, something that rarely happened, but she wasn’t sure how much longer she could handle this. Her body was screaming at her with the need to orgasm, every inch of her body aching with need.
But just as she truly considered saying her safe word, desperation clawing at her throat, she heard Azriel reenter the bedroom. She sagged in relief, softly sobbing as she heard him approaching. She heard rustling, and then movement in front of her, followed by scarred hands cupping her face. His lips pressed against her temple, his thumbs stroking her cheeks reassuringly.
“Shhh, it’s all right. I promised I’d be back, Sweetheart,” he murmured, peppering her face with kisses. She sighed with relief, too needy to form words. “You did so good, little bird. You were so patient. I think you deserve a reward. Would you like that?”
“Yes, please,” she moaned, forcing the words out, nodding frantically. She clenched her thighs, causing the glass toy to shift, drawing a gasp from her lips. “Oh gods, Az! Please, please do something.”
“Shhh, it’s okay, I will,” he promised, brushing his hands through her hair. “Do you still want me to fuck you, or do you want something else? You’ve done so well, love. Tell me what you want, and it’s yours.”
She whimpered, shifting restlessly on her knees, her wetness fully dripping down her legs now. “I…I still want that,” she whispered, her mind a frenzy of heat and need. She felt dizzy, her desperation to climax reaching new heights. “But I…I need you to touch me. Please, Az. Please, just touch me. I need your hands, your mouth, anything. Please. I need you.”
“Okay, I’ll take care of you, I promise,” he soothed her, gripping her elbows to guide her to stand up again. She obediently stood, her legs shaking uncontrollably, the glass toy still nestled inside of her throbbing center.
“Come here, Sweetheart,” he murmured, guiding her forward before turning her around. The backs of her knees hit the bed, and he helped her sit on the edge, his warmth filling her with renewed arousal. She clenched her thighs, clawing at the restraints on her wrists. She wanted to touch him, to feel his skin beneath her.
He helped her shimmy backward, easing her onto her back as he crawled over her, kneeling between her legs. She trembled, her inner walls fluttering around the glass toy as Azriel shifted her arms until they were stretched out over her head, the familiar tug of his shadows pulling on the ribbon to keep her in place. His breath danced across her skin, his mouth ghosting along her chest before finally meeting her lips softly. She bucked her hips up, trying to find his body, but he pushed her back down as he pulled away, one hand gripping her hip while the other trailed up her thigh.
And then the toy was suddenly pulled out of her, drawing out to the tip before shoving back in. She cried out, her back arching as her wrists strained at the ribbon. He pulled the toy out again, dragging the tip through her wet folds and circling her clit before slipping down to her entrance again. He eased the toy back in, only going a few inches before pulling it out. She gasped and whimpered, frantically pushing her hips up to meet his thrusts.
But he kept her in place, alternating between barely putting the toy inside of her to tease her and roughly thrusting it in until she was crying out in pleasure. His movements were unpredictable, making each sensation heightened, her inner walls fluttering uncontrollably as he fucked her with the glass toy. Then his shadows joined in, stroking her most sensitive places, nipping at her before Azriel soothed the marks with his tongue.
“Look at you, so needy,” he murmured against her skin, his lips trailing down to her breasts. “I thought you wanted my cock, Bird, but you seem to be doing fine without it. I guess I don’t need to fuck you after all…”
She let out a soft sob, arching her back into his mouth as his lips wrapped around her nipple. “No…no, please,” she whimpered, tugging at the restraints as he roughly thrust the toy into her again, his teeth nipping at her swollen peaks. “Please, Az! I still need you. Please. Oh gods, please. I want you to fuck me.”
“Hmmm, I’m not so sure, Gwyn,” he drawled, suckling at her sensitive nipples while dragging the toy in and out. “You’re already squirming, and I’m not even in you yet. How do I know you really want me? If you don’t want to have sex with me, you can just say it.”
“You asshole!” She screeched as he drew his mouth away from her, taunting her with her own words from earlier. He dragged the toy to her clit and back to her entrance, inserting it just enough to make her squirm again. “Just fuck me, please! I want you. I want you to take me. I want you to cum inside of me. Please. Please, Az!”
“Mmm, if you insist,” he chuckled, the sound coming from somewhere close to her legs. The hand on her hip prevented her from moving enough to reach him, the throbbing in her core making her frantic for him. “But…I think I’ll have dessert first.”
Before she could utter more than a small whimper, the toy was roughly pulled away from her, only to be replaced a second later with Azriel’s mouth. His tongue swirled her entrance, then delved into her, thrusting into her already aching cunt. Her back arched off the bed, her thighs clamping around him as pleasure burst through her.
His shadows kept her restrained, holding the ribbon down and preventing her from touching him. She squirmed frantically, shamelessly grinding her hips into his mouth. His tongue stroked up to her clit, circling it before his teeth nipped at her, sending a jolt of pleasure through her. She cried out, feeling her climax fast approaching. She was already so overly sensitive from his previous ministrations that she knew she wouldn’t last long with his expert mouth working her.
“Azriel, oh gods, yes!” She sobbed, her pussy clenching uncontrollably as he alternated between fucking her with his tongue and teasing her clit. “I’m…I’m not going to last long. Please. Oh gods. Az, Az, Az…”
Her pleas trailed off into a string of whimpers and sobs as his thumb found her clit, rubbing her steadily while his tongue delved into her relentlessly. She felt him chuckle against her, the vibration shooting through her and making her almost scream in ecstasy. With one final thrust of his tongue, his fingers stroking her clit, she fell over the edge.
Her back arched into him, a scream echoing through the room as hot bursts of pleasure shot through her, his tongue still fucking her as her inner walls fluttered around him. He continued working her until her body slowly relaxed, a small whimper escaping her as she tried to come back down from her high. He licked at her entrance, then swept up to her clit with one long stroke before finally pulling away.
She collapsed onto the bed, her body shaking yet somehow still aching with need. She was exhausted and overly sensitive, but the aphrodisiac was already beginning to urge her to find release again. She was far too tired to resist, going utterly pliant as Azriel slipped his arms around her and pulled her into his lap.
She fell against his chest, her still restrained arms tucked between them, her head resting on his shoulder as he stroked her back. She realized he must have removed his pants at some point because his very prominent erection was pressing into her stomach, drawing a needy moan from her. She was past the point of words, merely attempting to wiggle her hips to indicate what she wanted. She needed him inside of her. Needed to feel his hard length filling her as only he could.
“Try to breathe, Gwyn,” Azriel soothed her, shifting until he seemed to be in a seated position. He eased the blindfold off, allowing her to finally see him. “You’re doing so well, Sweetheart. So fucking well.”
She softly mewled, blinking as her eyes readjusted and squirming in his arms in a desperate attempt to get him to slip inside of her, but he held her firmly, keeping her still. She clenched her thighs around him, her core somehow even more wet than it had been. His cock twitched beneath her, indicating how much he was holding himself back.
“Az, please,” she managed to whisper, clawing at the ribbon on her wrists. “I need you. Please. I want to cum for you. I want you inside me. Please.”
“Mmm, so eager,” he murmured, kissing his way down her shoulder, his hands drifting to her ass and squeezing. “I think you’ve earned it. You’ve been so good for me, Sweetheart.”
She moaned at his words, gasping in relief when he shifted her over his length, positioning her how he wanted before sliding into her tight, throbbing cunt. She sobbed in ecstasy, reveling in how full she felt as he entered her. He pulled her tightly to him, adjusting her arms until they were over his neck, allowing her to press her body firmly against his. Her peaked nipples scraped against his hard chest, her walls already tightening around his cock.
She waited for him to do something, but he merely stroked her hips with his thumbs, his mouth still softly kissing her throat as he worked his way toward her chest. She shifted on him, clenching her thighs to try and get him to move. But still, nothing. She could feel his cock twitching inside of her, but he refused to do anything besides continue his leisurely exploration.
“Az…please, I need you to move,” she pleaded, her clit throbbing with need. It was rare for her to beg so willingly, even though she knew he liked it, but she was too desperate to tease him like she normally would. “I need to cum. Please, Azriel.”
“Then cum,” he commanded, his voice rough and full of heat. She sucked in a breath, her nipples once again peaking from her arousal. “Fuck yourself on my cock. I want to watch you riding me, so use me. Show me how much you need me, little bird. Fuck me.”
She stared at him, waiting to see if he was only teasing her again, but he gripped her hips harder, urging her on. She began slowly raising her hips, then let her body slip back down, adjusting to riding him while her hands were still bound. Azriel groaned deeply as she found a rhythm, bouncing her hips on him, his hardened length hitting her at an angle that quickly had her moaning in pleasure.
Azriel used one hand to keep her steady while he trailed the other up to her breasts, lightly squeezing before he began teasing her nipple. She clawed harder at the restraints, aching to touch him. Her walls clenched around his cock with every snap of her hips, leaving them both panting and moaning as they drew closer to release.
“You look so pretty like this,” Azriel groaned, his mouth roaming her skin, leaving small marks where he let his teeth nip at her. She bucked her hips harder, his encouragement spurring her on “You’re so fucking gorgeous, Gwyn. Gods, you feel good…”
His words trailed off as he threw his head back with a groan, his hands dropping to her hips and gripping her so tightly she knew it would bruise later. She moaned loudly when he pulled her down harder onto him, finally giving her the help she had wanted before. The restraints dug into her wrists as she desperately tried to touch him, her throbbing core fluttering around him as he began thrusting his hips up to meet hers.
“Azriel, I want to touch you. Please,” she whimpered, wildly rocking her hips in time with his. “Please let me touch you. Oh gods…it feels so good, please. I need to touch you.”
He chuckled, one hand drifting between them and stroking the area just above the apex of her thighs. She gasped and bucked uncontrollably, trying to get his hand to slip toward her clit. His fingers dug into her hip, his cock thrusting into her harder and harder with every movement.
“I’ll let you touch me on one condition, Sweetheart,” he growled, his eyes blazing as the hand near her center finally drifted down. She gasped as he began rubbing her clit, circling it with his fingers while he roughly thrust into her. “Never question how much I fucking want you again.”
He emphasized his demand with several hard thrusts upward, her body trembling with the force of how hard he was fucking her. She managed to nod while she clenched her walls frantically around his cock, moaning relentlessly as pleasure built in her core. But he still didn’t release her restraints, silently telling her that he wanted a verbal response from her.
“I…I won’t,” she agreed, mewling softly as the pressure of his fingers increased on her clit. His cock twitched inside of her, his thrusts hitting the sweet spot in her core that would have her coming undone in seconds. “I won’t question it. I promise. Oh gods, please. Please Az!”
As her words flooded out, she felt the ribbon around her wrists snap, his shadows releasing her from the restraints and allowing her to finally touch Azriel. She scratched at his shoulders, one hand delving into his hair while the other trailed down his back. He groaned deeply again, biting at her shoulder while she used him as leverage to grind on him harder, meeting his deep thrusts.
Their sounds of ecstasy filled the room, the hand on her clit helping push her toward the edge. Their movements were filled with desperate, uncontrolled need; their unintended abstinence from sex making them both almost wild with lust for each other.
With one more hard thrust from Azriel, pleasure burst through Gwyn’s senses, her orgasm crashing over her as she cried out in pleasure. Azriel’s name fell from her lips in a stream of whimpers and cries, her ecstasy drowning out everything. He kept fucking her through it, his hips snapping up to hers as her release shook her body.
As her climax eased, he flipped them over, his hand leaving her clit to grip her hips again. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he continued fucking her relentlessly, his cock slamming into her at a punishing pace. Her nails scraped at his back, another orgasm already building in her core, her inner walls clenching harder around his cock.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded roughly, looking at her through his lashes as he barreled toward his own release. She obeyed without question, reaching a hand between them to rub her clit, moaning loudly at the added sensation. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum, Gwyn.”
“Yes! Oh gods, yes, Az!” She cried, her eyes fluttering shut as she felt his body shudder, his release spilling into her. His head fell to her shoulder, his movements erratic as he fell over the edge, her name on his lips.
She followed him a moment later, pleasure washing over her once again as she climaxed, their bodies trembling as they both rode out their highs. His pace slowly eased as the last moments of pleasure filled them. They clung to each other, their breathing ragged, their bodies still joined.
They stayed like that for several minutes, his cock still inside of her, their bodies tangled together. She slowly removed her hand from between them, stroking his back as their breathing returned to normal. But just as she thought she was finally returning to normal, arousal once again built, the ache in her core making her whine in exhaustion.
“Are you all right, Love?” Azriel murmured, his breath tickling her skin. “Was that too much? Did I go too far?”
She let out a sound that was half sob half laugh. “No, you were perfect,” she assured him, shifting restlessly beneath him. “But…please tell me you made the antidote.”
He lifted his head with an amused smile, chuckling as he eased out of her. “It’s in the kitchen,” he explained, kneeling above her. “Come on, let’s get cleaned up and then we can go get it.”
She smiled in relief, sagging onto the bed as he went to retrieve a damp cloth to clean her up. She had enjoyed every second of tonight, but she was utterly exhausted. Not to mention, she was still starving. She wasn’t sure she could handle anymore wild sex unless she had food and a nap first.
To her delight, within 10 minutes she was perched on the kitchen counter, dressed in one of Azriel’s shirts, happily watching him collect the ingredients to make her pancakes while she sipped on her second cup of tea. The bitterness from the tea would normally have bothered her, but the relief the first cup had given her was enough to make her continue drinking it.
“Feeling better?” Azriel asked her with a smile, pausing his search to slide in between her legs, his hands stroking her thighs. She nodded happily, the ache in her core finally eased. “Good. What kind of pancakes do you want?”
She grinned, setting aside her empty teacup to give him a quick kiss. “Chocolate chip, please,” she requested, giggling when he pinched her sides playfully. “Thank you, Azriel. For the pancakes, and for taking care of me.”
“Mmm, my pleasure,” he murmured, leaning in for another kiss. She willingly obliged him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I love you, Bird.”
“I love you too,” she whispered against him, leaning her forehead against his. “After the pancakes, can we just cuddle? I’ve missed spending alone time with you these past few weeks.”
He smiled, kissing her softly before responding. “I’ve missed you too,” he agreed, pausing to kiss her again. “We can cuddle for as long as you want tonight. And tomorrow, we’re not going anywhere. I’d like you all to myself for a while.”
She giggled, letting him pepper her with kisses before he turned away to retrieve the chocolate morsels for the pancakes, her heart bursting with happiness. As Azriel mixed the pancake batter, the two of them falling into a comfortable silence, a thought popped into her head.
“Azriel?”
“Yes, my love?”
“No one else had the antidote…” she commented, thinking of their friends and family back in the Spring Court. She hadn’t been the only one to eat that pie, but she had been the only one given the antidote as far as she knew. That would certainly explain the lack of greeting when they had arrived for dinner.
Azriel turned to her, his eyes wide as he met her amused face, and then he burst into laughter, his deep rumble echoing through the kitchen. As Gwyn watched her mate double over with mirth, she couldn’t hold back the stream of giggles that flooded out, the two of them happily lost in each other. A slice of pie might have changed their plans for the evening, but she was right where she belonged.
Azriel diligently set the chess pieces on the board in front of him, quickly shrugging off his shirt as he went, nervous anticipation settling in. He knew he should be far more relaxed than this, after all, it wasn’t exactly his first time in a potentially sexual situation with a female. But this was the first time with Gwyn, and that made all the difference.
They had just returned from Velaris, having spent the night at dinner and then wandering the city until she was ready to come home. He had done everything in his power to make sure she was as relaxed as possible by the time they got to his bedroom, but he had failed at relaxing himself.
Now, as he waited for Gwyn to come out of the bathing room where she was changing, he felt like an inexperienced boy again, all his usual calmness failing him. They had already established that tonight would not involve sex, but he knew she wanted more than just their normal kisses. And it was making him far more nervous than he had ever been in the bedroom.
He glanced around the room, lit only by a few candles, forcing himself to take a few steadying breaths. This was Gwyn. He had nothing to be nervous about. Yet, a part of him was terrified. They had planned for tonight, but they had decided to simply see where the night took them. Gwyn knew she wanted more, but she wasn’t sure what that meant exactly. Which left him to figure it out and he was going out of his mind worrying that he would do the wrong thing.
He turned back to the table, pouring her a glass of wine, then filling one for himself. He brought the glass toward his mouth, but the wine never quite reached his lips. Every worry he had had in his mind vanished, leaving him content to enjoy the view in front of him.
And what a lovely view it was. Gwyn had silently exited the bathing room, stopping in the middle of the doorway when her eyes met Azriel’s. Clad in only the turquoise negligee and matching black underthings he had bought her weeks ago, Gwyn was stunning. She was always stunning but seeing her like this made his body ache for her.
“I thought we could play chess,” he blurted, gesturing vaguely at the table behind him. She giggled softly, slowly walking over to him and gently placing her hands on his bare chest. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly bone dry.
“Okay,” she said simply, leaning up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek before depositing herself in the plush armchair across from his. He forced his body to move, plopping down in his chair and handing her the glass of wine he had poured, a fresh wave of anxiety filling him. He wanted to get this right so much it hurt, but he was terrified he’d mess it up.
“Your move, Gwyn,” he nodded at the board, taking a deep gulp of wine while she studied her pieces. With one simple move, she started the game, forcing him to try and concentrate. And just like that, they fell into a comfortable silence, only occasionally speaking as the game progressed.
Before he knew it, an hour had passed, the two of them locked in a battle of skill to win the chess match. He had already decided he didn’t care if he won or lost; all he cared about was getting his hands on her, and his mouth, and his tongue. The sight of her was driving him insane; he wantedher.
But, unfortunately, she hadn’t made a single move that didn’t involve a chess piece. He was torn between wanting to throw the chess board to the side to pounce on her and wanting to let her decide how tonight progressed. It only seemed right to let her make the first move, to choose what she wanted from him.
While they had kissed and touched before, this was the first truly sexual experience she’d likely have with a male depending on what happened. He wanted it to be a good one. For it to be exactly what she wanted. The only problem was that he didn’t know what she wanted.
“Your move, Azriel,” she said quietly, a teasing note in her voice, breaking him from his musings. “Or are you going to admit defeat??
"Never,” he chuckled, refocusing on the chess board in front of him.
“Then move,” she laughed, grinning at him. “You’ve been staring at the board forever. I thought you had fallen asleep.”
He smiled, refusing to admit that his eyes had not been on the board. After a moment, he made his move. Not caring if it improved his chances of winning or not. He was more worried about the excellent vantage point he currently held, one that offered the ideal angle to take in every glorious inch of her exposed skin.
She looked utterly relaxed, sitting with one leg tucked under her and one knee up, leaning her chin on her raised knee. The position allowed him to see a positively indecent amount of her bare legs, all the way to the lacy underthings she wore. A sight that was seriously bringing the limits of his self-control into question.
He shifted in his seat, attempting to subtly adjust himself in his pants. He knew there was no hiding how hard he was, but he didn’t want it to be completely obvious how turned on he was. He didn’t want her to think he had lost all his restraint, even if he was currently imagining getting on his knees and tracing every inch of those gorgeous legs with his tongue. He wanted her closer. He needed to feel her body wrapped around his, her creamy skin under his hands.
“Az, it’s your turn again,” Gwyn softly giggled, shocking him out of his thoughts for the second time. “You’re so distracted.”
“I am not,” he weakly argued, blindly moving his knight to a position he knew might lose him the match. He didn’t care about the game anymore. All he could think about was her.
“If you say so,” she smirked, studying the board again. He returned to his own studies, his mind instantly wandering back to the wicked things he wanted to do to her.
Did she realize that she was fully exposing her legs to him? Was she aware that he could see every inch of the black lace that barely covered her sex? She had to be. How could she not know? Gods, she was so fucking sexy. He knew he should look elsewhere, but he couldn’t rip his eyes away. She looked like something out of the most delicious wet dream.
He couldn’t stop thinking about how she might look if he slowly, carefully, pulled those sinful underthings off. If he traced his tongue along the areas that were currently covered by lace. He wanted to hear her moan again like she had in the woods the other night. He wanted to taste her, to feel her body trembling with need against him. Hell, he just wanted her closer than she currently was. The small table between them suddenly felt huge.
He needed to touch her, to feel her soft, warm body pressing against his. He wanted to forget about chess and focus on more interesting activities. Like finding out what she sounded like when she orgasmed. Or learning if she would enjoy having his fingers buried in her while he kissed her senseless. He wanted to find out every possible way to have her moaning his name and begging him for more.
“Azriel, did I do something wrong?” Gwyn suddenly asked timidly, shocking him once again. A blush faintly colored her cheeks, her eyelashes lowered as she looked at him.
“What?” He said blankly, utterly confused. What could she have possibly done wrong? “Gwyn, honey why are you asking that?”
“Because…you haven’t tried anything,” she muttered, her cheeks flushing crimson. “I thought…I thought you would have by now. I…did I do something?”
“Oh fuck!” He gaped, understanding washing over him like a flood of icy water. Shit. She had wanted him to make the first move. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just…I didn’t want to rush you.”
“You’re not rushing me,” she assured him, fidgeting with the chess piece in front of her. “I want this. I was just hoping you would take the lead because…well, I don’t really know what I’m doing.”
He blinked, slowly processing her words. He rubbed a hand across his face, huffing a laugh. “I’m so sorry, Bird. I feel like an idiot. I’m not normally this oblivious in the bedroom, I promise.”
She laughed softly, a smile finally spreading across her face, the freckles on her nose scrunching in the way he loved. “You’re not an idiot. I appreciate you being so careful, I do. But…I don’t want you to treat me like I’m fragile.”
“Gwyn, honey,” he sighed, brushing through his hair in frustration. Of course she would think that. “Gwyneth, this…that’s not why I haven’t made a move yet. Please don’t think that.”
“Then why haven’t you?” She pressed, her voice holding a hint of defensiveness. He couldn’t blame her; he really had been a fool. Of course she would want him to take the lead, he had far more experience than her.
“I wanted to let you decide how tonight went,” he explained, leaning across the table to brush his hand along her wrist. “I wanted this to be perfect. That’s all. And honestly… I’m a little nervous myself.”
“Oh,” she mumbled, slowly lowering her leg from where it was currently bent in front of her. “You’re nervous too?”
He nodded, tracing circles across her wrist delicately, praying he hadn’t ruined their night. “Yes, Bird. Very nervous.”
“Why?”
“Because…I…I’ve never been with someone I care about this much. I don’t want to mess it up,” he slowly admitted, a blush of his own creeping up his neck. He averted his gaze, pulling away and rolling the stem of his wine glass between his fingers.
A moment later, Gwyn was sliding into his lap, her arms wrapping around his neck. He looked up at her, hesitantly placing his hands around her waist and drawing her closer. She smiled softly, kissing him with such tenderness it made his heart yearn for her. How was this gorgeous female his?
“Azriel, you’re not going to mess this up,” she assured him when she pulled away, brushing her thumb along his jaw. “I trust you. I want you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
He studied her, slowly letting her words sink in. Then he nodded, allowing himself to finally enjoy this. To sink into the feeling of just being with her. They both wanted this, so why the hell was he so worried?
“Okay,” he conceded, steadily relaxing the longer he held her in his arms. He had wanted to find out what made this beautiful female moan for months, and she was currently a willing participant, so it was about damn time he made a move. But first, they needed boundaries. She was new to this; he wouldn’t take one more step forward without drawing very clear lines.
“Gwyn, honey, before we do anything else, I want to make something very clear,” he firmly said, holding her patient gaze. “Whatever we do, it only goes as far as you feel safe with. And if, at any moment, you feel uncomfortable, you can tell me and I will stop. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing or how far we go. If I do something you don’t like or you are uncomfortable at all. Tell me and I will stop. Okay?”
She nodded obediently, the scent of her arousal slowly drifting up to him. He quickly kissed her, unable to resist, then pulled back again.
“You can also tell me if you do like something,” he encouraged her, brazenly stroking her outer thigh. She felt so damn good. “I’m willing to do anything you want. Just tell me.”
“Okay, I will,” she agreed quickly, her chest heaving, her breasts pushing against the thin fabric of her negligee with each breath. Her eyes were full of desire, her skin flushed a beautiful pink. And she was so temptingly soft in his arms. Fuck. He needed her.
“One more thing, and I don’t want you to forget this,” he forced himself to keep talking, knowing that once he started kissing her he wouldn’t be able to stop. “Whenever we’re being…intimate, if you’re uncomfortable, but you can’t find the words to tell me, I want you to scratch my wing right below the talon. Can you do that?”
“Yes, but won’t it hurt, Az?” She questioned, seeming hesitant, a small crease forming on her forehead. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t. It will sting for a second, but it’s fine. I would rather deal with that than do something you’re not completely comfortable with. Okay?” He didn’t care if it did hurt, he wouldn’t allow her to feel unsafe with him for even a moment.
“Okay, if you’re sure,” she agreed, her fingers lightly stroking the back of his neck. He shivered, desperate to feel her even closer. He released his hold on her, bringing a startled look to her face. He smiled, letting his desire finally rise to the surface.
“Now, how about we start figuring out what makes you feel good, Bird?” He drawled, his lips curling into a seductive smile. Her thighs noticeably clenched in his lap, filling him with satisfaction and desire. She was his, completely his.
“How?” She breathed, her nipples peaking beneath the fabric of her negligee. He licked his lips, eagerly anticipating everything to come. He was going to finally get to explore her body like he had wanted. Like he had craved. It was a godsdamn gift. She was a gift.
“Straddle me,” he commanded, his gaze dropping to her center as she moved off his lap. She didn’t hesitate before slowly crawling over him, her negligee riding to her waist just as he had anticipated, fully revealing her black lace panties. He gripped her waist with one hand, letting his other hand idly glide up and down her exposed thigh, reveling in how warm and soft she was.
“Tell me what you want,” he ordered, his voice dropping several octaves, his cock throbbing in his pants. He could sense her arousal, the scent of it combining with his and making him ravenous with need. She trembled slightly in his arms, her hands gripping his shoulders. He would do anything she wanted. Absolutely anything.
“Before I tell you what I want,” she began, shyness and excitement mingling in her eyes. “Is there anything you want? Anything I should do?”
He blinked, the question taking him by surprise. She was so willing, so ready to open herself up to whatever he asked for. It made him throb beneath her. He was so damn lucky to call this female his. His brave, lovely Gwyneth.
“Let’s not worry about that right now,” he said, refusing to take advantage of this moment. They had plenty of time to explore those things later. “I want to focus on you first. Is that all right?”
If she was willing to let him be the one to introduce her to the pleasures of the bedroom, then he wanted her to fully enjoy this first experience. His needs could come later. It was more than enough to simply experience this with her, to be the one that she was trusting with this. It didn’t matter how far they went tonight, if it was just kissing or more, he was going to make it about her pleasure.
She slowly nodded, goosebumps erupting on her skin as he continued stroking her thigh. He was going to enjoy every damn second of this. He silently instructed some of his shadows to watch the hallway, ensuring they would be uninterrupted for the rest of the evening. He wouldn’t allow any distractions tonight.
“Now, why don’t you tell me what you’re craving,” he offered, seduction creeping into his tone. Her thighs tightened against his legs, indicating his words had deepened her arousal. That knowledge alone was enough to drive him crazy. She was so unexpected, and so curious. It was intoxicating.
“I want you to kiss me,” she breathlessly admitted, her eyes searching his face. “I want you to touch me, and I want to feel your hands on my skin.”
He chuckled, tugging her body closer to his. He would gladly indulge her simple requests. “Your wish is my command, my lady.”
He barely gave her time to take a shuddering breath before his mouth was on hers, his restraint fully slipping. Her lips eagerly moved with his, opening for him when he began teasing her with his tongue. She moaned softly as he explored her mouth, his hands trailing up her sides, gripping at the thin fabric that separated them. Every sound she made went straight to his cock, his skin burning with desire. He had never felt something that felt so right, so natural, as having her in his arms, her mouth on his. He felt like he was home. He wanted this to last forever.
When she pulled away for air, he only paused for a moment to memorize the image of her flushed and needy on his lap, then he was trailing hot open-mouthed kisses along her jaw, nibbling at her skin as he worked his way down her throat, her back arching into him. As he dared to let his teeth bite into the base of her throat, his hands came up to her breasts, kneading the area just below them.
“Az,” she whimpered, her head falling onto his shoulder, her soft kisses along his neck punctuating her words. “Oh, that feels good. More please. More.”
He paused, surprise and curiosity on his face as he caught his breath. “Bird…which part felt good?”
She pulled her head back, hands buried in his hair as she met his gaze shyly. “Umm, both things you did. I…I liked both. Is that bad?”
“Not at all,” he assured her, dropping his hands to lightly squeeze her ass. She gasped, settling tighter against him. “I’m just shocked. That was the beginning of a hickey on your neck.”
“Oh…I liked it,” she reaffirmed, wiggling in his lap until her core was fully pressed against his throbbing erection. She let out an adorable sigh of satisfaction, then went back to softly kissing his neck, urging him on. Fuck. He was on fire. Every inch of his body burning with need, craving her touch, her taste, just her.
He was about to continue where he had left off but stopped again. “Gwyn?”
“Mm?” She murmured into his skin, her lips trailing up and down his throat.
“Can I take this off?” He asked, tugging at the straps of her negligee. He needed to feel her closer, needed to feel her skin against his. She pulled back, meeting his hungry stare with a slightly shy one. He bit his lip, hands dropping to the bottom edge of her negligee as he waited for a response.
“Yes,” she agreed after a moment, slowly raising her arms above her head. He studied her face for a moment, looking for any anxiety, but found none.
He turned his attention to the negligee, gripping the hem and slowly dragging it up her body. Unlike the other night when he had helped her undress, he let his hands fully glide along her skin, savoring every inch of bare skin that he revealed. When he reached her breasts, he shifted his hands until his thumbs could brush just next to her peaked nipples, earning a delightful gasp from her. He bit back a groan, his cock twitching painfully as he took in the sight of her almost naked body.
As he inched the negligee over her head and tossed it to the ground, he let his hands roam across her back, reveling in the soft warmth of her, tracing the freckles that dotted her skin. She brought her hands back down to his shoulders, watching him explore her. He brought his hands around to her abdomen, reverently tracing the delicate scars there before slowly gliding toward her breasts. She was so fucking beautiful.
With a final look at her to make sure she was still enjoying this, he brought his hands up to her breasts, cupping them in his scarred hands. She sighed softly, her eyes fluttering shut as he gently kneaded her, experimenting to see what she liked the most. Her fingers scraped at his shoulders, urging him forward. He trailed one hand down to her hip, tugging her closer as his mouth came down to her exposed nipple.
She gasped, her grip tightening as he swirled his tongue around the swollen peak, sucking and pulling to see how she would react. She whimpered and clawed at him, every swirl of his tongue seeming to make her arch her back deeper into him. He continued kneading and teasing her with one hand while working her other breast with his mouth, occasionally nipping at her with his teeth and tugging on the sensitive bud. His shadows interrupted his focus, seeking permission and momentarily forcing his mouth to pull away slightly from her.
“Gwyn, my shadows want to touch you,” he murmured pulling back to look at her, breathless and aching with lust. “Are you comfortable with that or would you prefer I keep them contained?”
"Oh. Um, please let them touch me,” she breathed out, wonder and pure need shining in her eyes. He had never seen anything more stunning.
“All right. I won’t let them wander anywhere too sensitive. I promise.”
She nodded, her eyes fluttering shut again. He commanded his shadows to keep their distance, only allowing them to touch her in ways that would soothe her, like they normally would. It was too soon to introduce her to what his shadows were fully capable of in bed. He didn’t want to overwhelm her.
As his shadows began an idle exploration of her, gentling caressing her pebbled skin, he let his mouth continue mapping her skin, working his way down her neck, savoring every inch of her. He had imagined doing this so many times, but nothing could compare to how it felt now. To have her in his arms, eagerly letting him taste her, letting him pleasure her. It was a dream. A perfect dream.
One hand on her hip, the other slowly kneading her breast, he trailed his tongue down her shoulder. Savoring the smooth skin, placing small kisses back up the path his tongue left. When he grazed his teeth across the base of her neck, she bucked her hips into him, her core pressing into his hard length. He could have exploded at the sensation, but it was nothing compared to the look that spread across her face. She hadn’t planned the movement, he could tell, but it seemed to please her.
“Does it feel good when you grind against me like that, Sweetheart?” He asked, seeking her verbal approval. He wouldn’t encourage her hips more if she didn’t want it.
She moaned, nodding vigorously. “Yes. Oh gods, yes.”
He chuckled, satisfied she was enjoying herself. He turned his attention to her core, removing his hand from her breast and grasping her hips, gently coaxing her body back down. He pressed her center tightly against him and encouraged her to move, giving her the friction she needed. She moaned loudly, dropping her head onto his neck and gripping the hair at the nape of his neck.
Fuck, this felt good. She was so warm and pliant in his arms. And gods, the way she was rocking against him felt perfect. If she kept grinding on him like this, he was going to cum in his pants, and he didn’t want that right now. He wanted this to be about her.
He forced himself to stop her for a moment, ignoring her cry of frustration when he pulled her back. A moment later, her annoyance turned to pleasure when he shifted her in his lap, lifting her until she was no longer straddling his waist. Instead, he sat her on one of his thighs, bringing her tightly against him. His cock throbbed at the sight of her perched on his leg, her warmth seeping into his thigh.
A small look of hesitation filled her eyes, so he leaned up to kiss her softly, gripping her hips firmly to encourage her to move. She hesitantly obeyed, experimentally grinding against his thigh with his help, gasping slightly at the new sensation. She pulled away, stopping her movements and meeting his eyes nervously.
“I’m not sure what to do,” she whispered, chest heaving with each breath. “It…it feels good, but I…I’m not sure if I’m doing this right.”
“It’s okay, honey. You’re doing so well,” he soothed her, moving one hand to softly rub her back in sweeping strokes. “Do you want me to help you find a rhythm?”
She nodded, her hands gliding across his shoulders. He smiled, kissing her jaw before gripping her hips again. Her back arched slightly, her eyes closing as he began moving her against him, helping her ride his thigh. He ignored the aching in his cock, focusing on how gorgeous she looked in his lap, slowly coming undone for him.
He continued the movements until she found a pattern and was moving on her own. He watched her rock her hips slowly against him for a moment, a blissful expression on her face, then he returned to his exploration of her neck and breasts, her sounds of pleasure making him groan in satisfaction. He had always enjoyed pleasuring his partners, watching them unravel at his touch, but this was completely different. He had never felt anything like this, and he never wanted it to end.
He placed a soft kiss in the valley between her breasts before circling one nipple, then the other, with his tongue. At the added sensation, she bucked harder, digging her hands into his shoulders and drawing a groan from him. As he made lazy trails with his tongue, following behind with his lips, he began to suspect that she was close.
His shadows confirmed it a moment later, whispering in his ear as she continued grinding into him. Her movements combined with his lazy oral exploration of her body was bringing her close to climaxing. He wanted to help her over the edge, but he hesitated. It was happening faster than he had expected, so he wasn’t sure she was ready yet. He wanted to be careful this time not to push her farther than she was ready, to make her feel safe. Which is why he kept a firm grip on his own desire, forcing himself to slow down.
He placed his hands on her hips, taking back control of her movements, and slowed her steady pace until she was barely moving. She met his gaze, her cheeks flushed and her eyes full of need as she desperately tried to buck her hips, but he held her firmly, keeping her movements controlled.
“Sweetheart, are you close?” He needed to hear her confirm it. Needed to know if he was reading her reactions right or not. It was important now, but it would be even more important later. If he wasn’t reading her correctly now, than he wouldn’t dare take things further with her.
“I think so,” she gasped out between shaking breaths.
“Do you want to, Bird? Do you want me to help you cum? You don’t have to say yes,” he promised her, fighting his own desire to feel her climaxing around him. He would do anything to make her feel good, but he knew he needed to go slow for her.
"I want to. I want it. Please.” She half sobbed as she continued trying to grind against him.
He nodded, accepting her response. He released his grip on her hips, allowing her to return to her soft rhythm. She moaned loudly as her clothed sex made contact with his firm thigh again, her head falling back while she began rocking her hips once more. Her skin was flushed, every thrust of her hips telling him just how turned on she was.
Even through the layers of fabric still separating them, he could feel how wet she had gotten. She was soaked, leaving an area of moisture on his pants. The increasing moisture on his leg made him want to rip her panties to the side so he could properly feel her, but he could tell she wasn’t ready for that yet. Exploring that part of her would have to wait; for now, he simply wanted to help her find release. He gripped her hips, encouraging her movements, trying to drive her over the edge.
His shadows traced soft lines up and down her back and caressed her face, soothing her while he focused on pleasuring her. He had considered the fact that this was likely her first time climaxing with a male, and he was determined to make sure she felt comfortable doing so. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t going to cum, he just wanted her to be satisfied.
He watched her for another moment, then began sucking on her breasts again. He took a swollen nipple into his mouth, gently tugging with his teeth. She dug into his shoulders again, her moans once again filling the room as she drew closer to orgasming. He repeated the gesture, overwhelmed by satisfaction as she continued moaning and panting with every nip of his teeth.
In between his explorations, he kept a close watch on her, occasionally looking up to make sure she was all right. He could tell she was so damn close, teetering on the edge of ecstasy. Her face was filled with pleasure, but there was a hint of hesitation, a small crease between her brows as she met his gaze.
He was fairly certain she was nervous about climaxing for the first time, which only made him want to please her more. He kissed her deeply, wanting to show her how much he was enjoying this. He would make her feel safe enough to let go, safe enough to be completely vulnerable with him.
“It’s alright, Sweetheart,” he reassured her, gripping her thighs and pulling her tighter against him while she bucked her hips. “You can let go. It’s okay.”
“I…I don’t…I don’t know if I can,” she tumbled out, desperation in her tone. He increased the pace of her thrusts, guiding her to ride him faster. “Az, please. I…I…I need help. Please. I’m scared. Please.”
"It’s okay,” he said, steadily rocking her hips against his leg and softly kissing her cheeks, giving her the encouragement she needed. “It’s okay. I’m right here, honey. I’m right here. Just let go.”
He brazenly reached one hand between them, the other still helping guide her. He glided his hand along the top of her panties until he reached the spot just above her clit, then he began steadily rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves through the fabric, her wetness seeping through the thin cloth. Fuck, she was soaked. She gasped and bucked, shocked by the added pleasure point.
“Is this okay, Sweetheart?” He questioned, not increasing the pressure of his fingers until he knew she was okay with it. She frantically nodded, grinding her hips wildly into his palm. “I need you to say it, honey. Try to talk to me, Gwyn”
“Yes,” she gasped, gripping his shoulders so tightly it stung. But he wasn’t about to stop her, not when she was so fucking close he could feel her core throbbing against him. “More, please. Oh gods, Azriel. Please. I’m so close. I’m so close, Az.”
"That’s it, Sweetheart,” he breathed in her ear, verbally trying to help her along. “You’re doing so well. You’re doing sofucking well. Just look at how hard I am, Bird. It’s all because of you.”
His words sent her grinding erratically, all control slipping. He kept rubbing circles on her sensitive clit, groaning as her wetness slowly coated his fingers through her panties, nibbling at her neck with his mouth to keep himself grounded. Her moans grew louder, filling the room with her sounds of ecstasy, her fingertips digging into the skin on his back.
The sight of her thrusting against him was almost enough to make him cum in his pants, but he resisted the urge. He wouldn’t lose control, not when she needed him like this. She needed to know he could stay calm, that it was safe to be at her most vulnerable, her most exposed. He didn’t care if it took her all night to finally climax, he was determined to make this all about her.
As he continued coaxing her toward the edge, his fingers pressing into her clit, her body suddenly shuddered, pleasure exploding through her. She cried out his name as her orgasm washed over her, her head falling onto his shoulder. He continued rubbing against her throbbing clit, helping her ride out the climax, wave after wave of pleasure coursing through her. As her body slowly stopped shaking, he gently pushed her hips into him a few more times, easing her through the final moments of pleasure.
When her body slowly relaxed, collapsing against him, he eased his hand out from between them to stroke her back, cradling her to his chest. As her breathing evened out, he gently pulled her head back so he could see her. Her eyes were shut while he stroked her side, a glazed expression coloring her features. His shadows softly caressed her face, her arms, her legs; once again soothing her.
“Bird, talk to me,” he murmured, worry flaring. He needed to make sure she was okay, that she had enjoyed what had happened. He wouldn’t be able to relax until he knew she was all right, that she felt safe and happy. “Gwyn, please, I need you to talk to me.”
She sighed softly, her eyes slowly opening. “I’m not sure I’m capable of speech right now.”
He let out a strangled laugh, relieved that she was responding. “That happens sometimes.”
As he looked at her, the flush on her cheeks deepened. "I wasn’t expecting that to happen,” she shyly admitted, concern clouding her eyes. “Was that okay? I know it was probably strange. I -”
He cut her off with a thorough kiss, leisurely tasting her before calmly putting her mind at rest. “It was perfect. It wasn’t strange at all. Your body reacted naturally to what you were experiencing.”
“But…I didn’t do anything for you.”
“I already told you, I wanted this to be about you. Besides, you did plenty,” he whispered in her ear, gently smoothing her hair down. She was all flushed and breathless and rumpled; she looked gorgeous. “Having you climax in my arms was more than enough.”
She finally smiled at him, her shyness disappearing as he let his fingers glide against her bare thigh, earning him a small sigh of satisfaction in response. He loved how responsive she was to him. It was unexpected and perfect all at the same time. He pulled back to look at her face again, worry clouding his happiness for a moment.
“Are you okay though?” He asked, slightly unsure of himself. “Did I take things too far? Did you…did you enjoy yourself?”
“It was perfect,” she sighed, her eyes sparkling as she leaned her forehead against his. “I enjoyed every second. You made me feel absolutely wonderful.”
“Good.” Hearing those words made his chest explode with happiness and pride. Satisfied that she was satisfied, he tucked his face into her neck, content to just hold her for a few moments.
“Next time, how about we try it without these on,” he teasingly tugged the hem of her panties, for emphasis, drawing a giggle out of her. “Would that be okay?”
“Mmmm,” she eagerly nodded, running her hands through his hair. Fuck. Could he be anymore lucky? “That would very much be okay.”
He grinned, bringing his mouth to hers then scooping her up into his arms. She let out a squeal, clinging to his shoulders while he carried her to bed. He pulled back the covers, then deposited her on the mattress, letting his lips linger before pulling away. She smiled softly, her eyes darting to his throbbing erection, then back up to his face.
“Are you sure I shouldn’t…you know?” She asked, a flush coloring her cheeks again. He shook his head, sensing her mild anxiety. He would teach her about pleasuring him later, when she was ready. For now, he was content with the images of her coming undone on his leg to keep himself satisfied.
“I’m sure, Gwyneth. It’s okay,” he assured her, kissing her on her temple before backing away toward the bathing room. “I’ll take care of it. Close your eyes, I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
She nodded, settling deeper under the covers while he disappeared into his bathing room. He barely had the door shut behind him before he had his pants undone and his cock free, precum practically dripping from the tip. He wrapped his fist around his length, biting his lip to stifle the groan that crawled up his throat. He had pleasured himself to fantasies of Gwyn before, but this was different. This time, it wasn’t a fantasy, and that made him feel almost wild with lust.
He began pumping himself quickly, too on edge to take it slow. He let his mind fill with images of Gwyn, the gorgeous memory of her coming undone bringing him easily closer to his own climax. It only took a few more quick thrusts before his orgasm crashed over him, drawing a strangled moan from his lips.
He leaned against the door, catching his breath before grabbing a damp cloth to clean himself up. Once he was satisfied he didn’t look totally dazed with pleasure, he finished readying himself for bed and strode out, blowing out the few candles he had lit earlier.
Gwyn was already half dozing in his bed, a contented little smile on her full lips. He watched her for a second, then crawled into bed with her, smiling when she blinked up at him and curled into his side, her leg immediately draping over his.
“Better?” She murmured, tenderly kissing his jaw. He leaned into her touch, wrapping his arms around her, a ridiculously happy grin plastered on his face.
“Much better,” he confirmed, kissing the top of her head. She let out a happy hum, burrowing deeper against him, her head tucked into his shoulder. He sighed in contentment, pure joy and satisfaction coursing through him. This was bliss.
“Azriel?”
“Yes, Gwyn?”
“Tonight was perfect,” she quietly said, her lips grazing the sensitive skin on his shoulder. He leaned back to meet her gaze, only to find her eyes already closed, that happy smile still on her face. He settled back into the pillows, stroking her back as he closed his eyes.
He hummed his agreement, sleep already beginning to claim him. She was right, tonight had been perfect. Better than he could have dreamed. He couldn’t wait to explore more with her, to find out every possible way to satisfy her. Tonight was only the beginning.
Gwyn stared at herself in the mirror, carefully smoothing the silk of her negligee until it was lying perfectly smooth across her skin. Despite the fact that she had no idea what was about to happen, she was oddly calm. She knew she was safe. Azriel would be with her the whole time, no matter what happened.
He had already been more than attentive tonight, helping her relax before they came to his room. They had just returned from Velaris, having spent the night at dinner and then wandering the city until she was ready to come home. He had been patient the entire time, never once making her feel rushed or pressured to move faster. It had helped her calm most of her nerves, allowing her to simply enjoy being with him.
Now, as she took a final steadying breath before walking into the bedroom, she was nervous but excited. They had already established that tonight would not involve sex, but she knew it would be more than just their normal kissing. The thought made her almost giddy. She knew Azriel would go at her pace, even if that meant they didn’t go any further than kissing. She could trust him, even with the things she feared the most.
With that thought in her head, she walked out of the bathing room, pausing in the middle of the doorway when her eyes found Azriel. His hand was poised with a wineglass halfway to his mouth, his jaw going slack as his eyes roamed her body. Clad in only the turquoise negligee and matching black underthings he had bought her weeks ago, Gwyn was far more exposed than normal. And Azriel seemed to like it.
“I thought we could play chess,” he blurted, gesturing vaguely at the table behind him. She giggled softly, slowly walking over to him and gently placing her hands on his bare chest. He visibly swallowed, his jaw working furiously as he watched her.
“Okay,” she said simply, leaning up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek before depositing herself in the plush armchair across from his. She bit back a smile as she watched him plop into his own chair, handing her a glass of wine in the process. She took a tentative sip, ignoring his penetrating gaze and turning her eyes to the gameboard in front of her.
“Your move, Gwyn,” Azriel nodded at the board, taking a deep gulp of wine while she studied her pieces. With one simple move, she started the game, forcing them both to focus. And just like that, they fell into a comfortable silence, only occasionally speaking as the game progressed.
Before she knew it, an hour had passed, the two of them locked in a battle of skill to win the chess match. As the game progressed, her anxiety grew. She had expected him to do something by now, but he had remained resolutely on his side of the table, which had made her increasingly worried.
She forced herself to stay calm, attempting to appear as relaxed as possible even while butterflies erupted in her stomach. She wanted him so much, but she had no idea where to start. He was looking at her with obvious hunger in his eyes, yet he hadn’t attempted to do anything with her yet.
“Your move, Azriel,” she said quietly, forcing a teasing note in her voice so he wouldn’t notice how nervous she had become. “Or are you going to admit defeat?”
"Never,” he chuckled, focusing on the chess board in front of him.
“Then move,” she laughed, grinning at him despite her frustration. “You’ve been staring at the board forever. I thought you had fallen asleep.”
He smiled but said nothing else. She was certain he had not been paying attention to the board, but even when he was distracted, his poker face was unmatched. Yet she was certain he wasn’t nearly as interested in the chess match as he seemed.
She was sitting with one leg tucked under her and one knee up, leaning her chin on her raised knee, and she could feel his eyes on her. Yet every time she looked at him, he averted his gaze. It was only the occasional shifting in his seat and the subtle adjustments of the growing bulge in his pants that confirmed her suspicions. He was aroused. Very aroused. But he still hadn’t done anything, and she couldn’t figure out why. It was driving her crazy.
“Az, it’s your turn again,” Gwyn softly giggled when he once again tried adjusting himself. “You’re so distracted.”
“I am not,” he weakly argued, quickly moving his knight without his normal careful strategizing.
“If you say so,” she smirked, studying the board again with increasing frustration.
She could once again feel his eyes on her, but she kept her gaze on the table, a mixture of arousal and anxiety flowing through her. She wanted him to touch her, to show her all the things she had only dreamt about. She wanted his strong body holding her, his scarred hands exploring every inch of her skin. But he still hadn’t made a single move.
“Azriel, did I do something wrong?” Gwyn finally asked timidly, unable to stop herself from fearing the worst. He looked startled, which brought a blush to her cheeks. She lowered her gaze, looking at him through her lashes while she anxiously awaited his response.
“What?” He said blankly, seeming caught off guard. “Gwyn, honey why are you asking that?”
“Because…you haven’t tried anything,” she muttered, her cheeks flushing crimson. “I thought…I thought you would have by now. I…did I do something?”
“Oh fuck!” He gaped, understanding dawning across his handsome features. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just…I didn’t want to rush you.”
“You’re not rushing me,” she assured him, fidgeting with the chess piece in front of her. “I want this. I was just hoping you would take the lead because…well, I don’t really know what I’m doing.”
He blinked, slowly processing her words. He rubbed a hand across his face, huffing a laugh. “I’m so sorry, Bird. I feel like an idiot. I’m not normally this oblivious in the bedroom, I promise.”
She laughed softly, a smile spreading across her face. Her nerves eased, his soothing voice calming her. “You’re not an idiot. I appreciate you being so careful, I do. But…I don’t want you to treat me like I’m fragile.”
“Gwyn, honey,” he sighed, brushing through his hair with obvious exasperation. “Gwyneth, this…that’s not why I haven’t made a move yet. Please don’t think that.”
“Then why haven’t you?” She pressed, her voice taking on a hint of defensiveness. She had been sitting here for more than an hour in nothing but a negligee - she deserved an explanation.
“I wanted to let you decide how tonight went,” he explained, leaning across the table to brush his hand along her wrist. “I wanted this to be perfect. That’s all. And, honestly…I’m a little nervous myself.”
“Oh,” she mumbled in surprise, slowly lowering her leg from where it was bent in front of her. “You’re nervous too?”
He nodded, tracing circles across her wrist. “Yes, Bird. Very nervous.”
“Why?” Of all the answers she could have fathomed, this was not one she had expected. He was so experienced that she had never imagined he would be nervous.
“Because…I…I’ve never been with someone I care about this much. I don’t want to mess it up,” he slowly admitted, a blush of his own creeping up his neck. He averted his gaze, pulling away and rolling the stem of his wine glass between his fingers.
She blinked slowly, her anxiety fading. It was so rare to see him unsure of himself that it somehow calmed her. To know he was as nervous as she was filled her heart with an ache that she was slowly becoming familiar with, even if she wasn’t ready to name it yet.
She slowly moved out of her seat, quietly walking around the table and sliding into his lap. He looked up as she wrapped her arms around his neck, his hands hesitantly going around her waist to pull her closer. She smiled softly, kissing him tenderly and trying to communicate everything she felt with the simple kiss.
“Azriel, you’re not going to mess this up,” she assured him when she pulled away, brushing her thumb along his jaw. “I trust you. I want you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
He studied her for a long moment, then he slowly nodded, his body relaxing against hers. She breathed a sigh of relief, glad they were finally getting somewhere. She wasn’t sure she could handle being so close to him any longer without having his hands on her.
“Okay,” he conceded, his eyes softening the longer he held her. Eager anticipation filled her, her body thrumming with need and want. She was about to kiss him, but he seemed to have other ideas, suddenly turning serious again.
“Gwyn, honey, before we do anything else, I want to make something very clear,” he firmly said, holding her gaze. “Whatever we do, it only goes as far as you feel safe with. And if, at any moment, you feel uncomfortable, you can tell me and I will stop. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing or how far we go. If I do something you don’t like or you are uncomfortable at all. Tell me and I will stop. Okay?”
She nodded obediently, her arousal only growing at his thoughtful considerations. He was hers, completely hers. He quickly kissed her, the small gesture melting her even further, then he pulled back again.
“You can also tell me if you do like something,” he encouraged, brazenly stroking her outer thigh. A shiver ran up her spine. “I’m willing to do anything you want. Just tell me.”
“Okay, I will,” she agreed, her chest heaving, her breasts pushing against the thin fabric of her negligee. Her body was burning with desire, warmth building in her core, a flush spreading across her skin. It felt strange and wonderful at the same time.
“One more thing, and I don’t want you to forget this,” he firmly stated, forcing her to stay focused for a moment longer. “Whenever we’re being…intimate, if you’re uncomfortable, but you can’t find the words to tell me, I want you to scratch my wing right below the talon. Can you do that?”
“Yes, but won’t it hurt, Az?” She questioned, eager to continue but hesitant to do as he asked. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t. It will sting for a second, but it’s fine,” he promised her, calmly soothing her worries. “I would rather deal with that than do something you’re not completely comfortable with. Okay?”
“Okay, if you’re sure,” she agreed, her fingers lightly stroking the back of his neck. She felt him shiver, but then he unexpectedly released her, confusing her. He smiled, his desire fully evident in his hazel eyes.
“Now, how about we start figuring out what makes you feel good, Bird?” He drawled, his lips curling into a seductive smile. Her thighs clenched in his lap, her body flooding with warmth. Gods she wanted him.
“How?” She breathed, her nipples peaking beneath the fabric of her negligee. He licked his lips, the gesture making her almost weak with excitement. She felt like she was on fire, every nerve in her body hypersensitive to everything around her.
“Straddle me,” he commanded roughly, his gaze dropping to her center as she moved off his lap. She didn’t hesitate before slowly crawling over him, not bothering to adjust her negligee as it rode up to her waist to fully reveal her black lace panties. He gripped her waist with one hand, his other hand idly caressing her exposed thigh.
“Tell me what you want,” he ordered, his voice dropping several octaves, his hardened length throbbing mere inches from her aching core. She trembled slightly in his arms, her hands gripping his shoulders.
“Before I tell you what I want,” she began, shyness and excitement mingling in her eyes. “Is there anything you want? Anything I should do?”
He blinked, the question seeming to surprise him. He had been so patient with her, so careful. She wanted to offer him something in return. Even if she wasn’t entirely sure she was ready for whatever he might ask for.
“Let’s not worry about that right now,” he said, not taking advantage of her offer, much to her surprise. “I want to focus on you first. Is that all right?”
A small wave of relief washed over her. She wanted him, and she wanted to learn how to pleasure him, but a large part of her knew she wasn’t totally ready to take that step yet. That she needed more time. He seemed to sense that, even though she had just offered to do whatever he wanted, and she couldn’t be more grateful. How had she gotten so lucky to call this male hers?
She slowly nodded, goosebumps erupting on her skin as he continued stroking her thigh. The simple motion of his hand on her body was enough to make her almost moan with pleasure. This felt right, it felt natural. Like this was exactly where she belonged.
“Now, why don’t you tell me what you’re craving,” he offered, seduction creeping into his voice. Her thighs tightened against his legs, her arousal deepening at his utterly intoxicating tone.
“I want you to kiss me,” she breathlessly admitted, her eyes searching his face. She wasn’t sure how to explain what she wanted, but she knew she wanted him closer. “I want you to touch me, and I want to feel your hands on my skin.”
He chuckled, tugging her body tighter to his. “Your wish is my command, my lady.”
He barely gave her time to take a shuddering breath before his mouth was on hers, his restraint seeming to completely slip. She melted into him, her lips eagerly moving with his, opening for him when he began teasing her with his tongue. She moaned softly as he explored her mouth, his hands trailing up her sides, gripping at the thin fabric that separated them. This kiss felt different, deeper somehow, like they had both fallen into something they had no desire to come back from.
When she pulled away for air, he only paused for a moment before claiming her further, then he was trailing hot open-mouthed kisses along her jaw, nibbling at her skin as he worked his way down her throat. Her back arched into him, her legs trembling as she tried to catch her breath. Just when she thought she couldn’t possibly feel any more aroused, his teeth dug into the base of her throat as his hands came up to her breasts, kneading the area just below them.
“Az,” she whimpered, her head falling onto his shoulder as a burst of pleasure shot through her. She trailed soft kisses along his neck, punctuating her words. “Oh, that feels good. More please. More.”
She didn’t care if she sounded needy, she just wanted him to do more of what he had just done. She needed more. Desperately.
He paused, surprise and curiosity in his voice. “Bird…which part felt good?”
She pulled her head back, hands buried in his hair as she met his gaze shyly. “Umm, both things you did. I…I liked both. Is that bad?”
“Not at all,” he assured her, dropping his hands to lightly squeeze her ass. She gasped, settling tighter against him. “I’m just shocked. That was the beginning of a hickey on your neck.”
“Oh…I liked it,” she reaffirmed, shivering under the weight of his desire filled gazed. She experimentally wiggled in his lap until her core was fully pressed against the hard bulge in his pants, letting out a sigh of satisfaction at having him so close. Then she went back to softly kissing his neck, urging him to continue.
“Gwyn?” He asked, pausing once more.
“Mm?” She murmured into his skin, her lips trailing up and down his throat. She couldn’t seem to get enough of his taste, his body, everything. She needed to feel him everywhere.
“Can I take this off?” He asked, tugging at the straps of her negligee. She pulled back, meeting his hungry stare with a slightly shy one. She still wasn’t used to being completely exposed to him, but the softness in his face, seeping through the desire, reassured her. Azriel would never make her feel uncomfortable.
He bit his lip, hands dropping to the bottom of her negligee as he waited for a response. She watched him, memorizing the way he looked in that moment, so patient even when he was clearly fighting his own needs and wants. It made her heart ache.
“Yes,” she agreed, slowly raising her arms above her head.
He studied her face for a moment, then he turned his attention to the negligee, gripping the hem and slowly dragging it up her body. Unlike the other night when he had helped her undress, his hands fully glided along her skin, sending fresh waves of goosebumps across her body. When he reached her breasts, he shifted his hands until his thumbs brushed just next to her peaked nipples, earning a gasp from her.
As he inched the negligee over her head and tossed it to the ground, his hands roamed across her back. She reveled in his touch, eager to feel him closer, to finally experience all the things she had thought about. She brought her hands back down to his shoulders, watching him explore her slowly.
He brought his hands to her abdomen, tracing the delicate scars there before slowly gliding toward her breasts. She shivered again, her thighs clenching around him. She had never known that having someone deliberately touch her scars could be so attractive, but having Azriel do it made her want to completely unravel for him.
With a final look at her, he brought his hands to her breasts, finally cupping them in his large hands. She sighed softly, her eyes fluttering shut as he gently kneaded her, an aching relief washing over her. Gods this felt good. Her fingers scraped at his shoulders, urging him forward, desperate for more. He trailed one hand down to her hip, tugging her closer as his mouth came down to her exposed nipple.
She gasped loudly, her grip tightening on him as he swirled his tongue around the swollen peak, sucking and pulling at her sensitive bud. He continued exploring her, kneading and teasing her with one hand while working her other breast with his mouth, occasionally nipping at her with his teeth and tugging on her swollen peaks.
She thought she might explode with the amount of pleasure coursing through her. She knew she had always had sensitive breasts, but the way he was touching her was making her positively tremble with need and ecstasy. She had never thought she would experience this, and now that she was, she never wanted to stop.
“Gwyn, my shadows want to touch you,” he murmured. pulling back to look at her. “Are you comfortable with that or would you prefer I keep them contained?”
"Oh. Um, please let them touch me,” she breathed out, wonder and pure need shining in her eyes. She wanted everything. She wanted to experience every single ounce of pleasure Azriel could show her.
“All right. I won’t let them wander anywhere too sensitive. I promise,” he assured her quietly, his face full of need, his eyes slightly glazed.
She nodded, her eyes fluttering shut, almost moaning when his shadows began softly caressing her body, adding to the delicious sensations their master was already causing. Gods, she had no idea it could be like this. They had hardly done anything, yet it was already a thousand times better than anything she had read or dreamt of. This was pure, unadulterated bliss.
As his shadows idly touched her, gently caressing her pebbled skin, his mouth continued roaming her body, working his way down her neck. She gripped him tightly, clinging to him to keep herself steady, her thighs clenching over and over again as she unconsciously sought friction.
One hand on her hip, the other slowly kneading her breast, he trailed his tongue down her shoulder. He placed small kisses back up the path his tongue left, while she alternated between gripping his hair and clinging to his shoulders and back. When he grazed his teeth across the base of her neck, she bucked her hips into him, bringing her a burst of pleasure. She hadn’t planned the movement, which made her slightly nervous, but the feeling it gave her drowned out any anxiety she felt.
"Does it feel good when you grind against me like that, Sweetheart?” Azriel asked, his deep honeyed tone completely undoing her.
She moaned, nodding vigorously. “Yes. Oh gods, yes.”
He chuckled, seeming satisfied with himself. She didn’t have time to think before he turned his attention to her core, removing his hand from her breast and grasping her hips, gently coaxing her body back down. He pressed her core tightly against him and encouraged her to move, giving her the friction she needed. She moaned loudly as more pleasure spread through her, dropping her head onto his neck and gripping the hair at the nape of his neck.
No book could possibly have prepared her for just how incredible this would feel. Not even her own hesitant explorations on her own compared to this. She could only imagine what it would be like if there weren’t several layers of clothing between them. She knew she wasn’t ready for that yet, but this alone was enough to make her crave his touch for the rest of eternity.
A moment later, her ecstasy was momentarily interrupted when he suddenly stopped. She involuntarily let out a cry of frustration, but it quickly turned to pleasure when he shifted her in his lap. Instead of straddling his waist, he moved her to one of his legs, positioning her on his thigh and tugging her tightly against him.
The friction was beyond incredible, but she was suddenly filled with hesitation, unsure of how to approach this new position. She had never read about this, nor had she been told by any of her friends that this was a normal thing to do.
But he quickly leaned up to kiss her softly, gripping her hips firmly to encourage her. She hesitantly obeyed, experimentally grinding against his thigh, gasping slightly at the new sensation. She pulled away a moment later, stopping her movements and meeting his eyes nervously, needing reassurance before continuing.
“I’m not sure what to do,” she whispered, chest heaving with each breath. “It…it feels good, but I…I’m not sure if I’m doing this right.”
“It’s okay, honey. You’re doing so well,” he soothed her, moving one hand to softly rub her back in sweeping strokes. “Do you want me to help you find a rhythm?”
She nodded, her hands sliding across his shoulders, tracing his tattoos. He smiled, kissing her jaw before gripping her hips again. Her back arched slightly, her eyes closing as he began moving her against him, helping her ride his thigh. The movement made her core positively throb with need, the wetness between her legs growing as she slowly found a rhythm that felt good.
He continued helping her until she found a pattern and was moving on her own. She closed her eyes, reveling in the sensations as she rocked her hips against him, each thrust filling her with ecstasy. She had never felt anything like this. Her inner walls were clenching around nothing, the pressure of his thigh against her clit making her almost want to beg for more.
When he returned to his exploration of her neck and breasts, her moans and gasps only grew louder, mixing with his small sounds of satisfaction. He placed a chaste kiss in the valley between her breasts before circling one nipple, then the other, with his tongue. At the added sensation, she bucked harder, digging her nails into his shoulders. As he made lazy trails with his tongue, following behind with his lips, she could feel herself drawing closer to the edge.
His shadows darted around her body, caressing her everywhere that Azriel wasn’t touching. Between her continued thrusting against him and his lazy oral exploration of her body, she was impossibly close. Surprise mingled with her arousal; she had never been this close to the edge this quickly.
Before she had time to overthink anything, he suddenly placed his hands on her hips, taking back control of her movements, and slowed her steady pace until she was barely moving. She met his gaze, her cheeks flushed and her eyes full of need as she desperately tried to buck her hips again.
“Sweetheart, are you close?” He asked, his voice rough and filled with desire.
“I think so,” she gasped out between shaking breaths, her body trembling in his arms.
“Do you want to, Bird? Do you want me to help you cum? You don’t have to say yes.”
“I want to. I want it. Please.” She half sobbed as she continued trying to grind against him. She wanted nothing more in that moment than to let him make her cum, to make her unravel entirely in his arms. She would do whatever he asked if it meant he helped her climax.
He nodded, accepting her response. He released his grip on her hips, allowing her to return to her soft rhythm. She moaned loudly as her clothed sex made contact with his firm thigh again, her head falling back while she began rocking her hips once more. She could feel his cock throbbing against her leg, the hard muscles of his leg grinding into her aching clit, increasing the warmth pooling in her center.
She was soaked, leaving an area of moisture on his pants, but she couldn’t bring herself to feel shy about it. She wanted him to know how much she wanted him, to see the way her body reacted to him and only him.
He gripped her hips again, encouraging her movements and pushing her closer to release. His shadows traced soft lines up and down her back and caressed her face, soothing her. She grew slightly nervous, fear at her impending climax blooming. She had never orgasmed with anyone. What if she got all the way to the edge, but couldn’t finish? What if she panicked?
He watched her for another moment, then began teasing her breasts again. He took a swollen nipple into his mouth, gently tugging with his teeth. She dug into his shoulders again, her moans filling the room as she drew closer to orgasming, her anxiety mixing with her pleasure.
She was so close, teetering on the edge of ecstasy, yet she wasn’t sure she could finish. Her nervousness increased as she felt her body tightening, her orgasm quickly approaching as she hesitantly met Azriel’s gaze. He kissed her deeply, calming some of her fears while he continued helping her rock her aching core into his thigh. She clung to him, needing him more than ever.
“It’s all right, Sweetheart,” he reassured her, sensing her anxiety. He knew her better than anyone, a fact that she was more grateful than ever for. He gripped her thighs, pulling her tighter against him while she bucked her hips. “You can let go. It’s okay.”
“I…I don’t…I don’t know if I can,” she tumbled out, desperation filling her. She was so close, so impossibly close. He increased the pace of her thrusts, guiding her to ride him faster. “Az, please. I…I…I need help. Please. I’m scared. Please.”
"It’s okay,” he said, steadily rocking her hips against his leg and softly kissing her cheeks, giving her the encouragement she needed. “It’s okay. I’m right here, honey. I’m right here. Just let go.”
She watched as he slowly reached one hand between them, the other still helping guide her. He glided his hand along the top of her soaked panties until he reached the spot just above her clit, then he began steadily rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves through the fabric, her wetness seeping through the thin cloth.
She gasped and bucked her hips, grinding wildly, shocked by the added pleasure point.
“Is this okay, Sweetheart?” He questioned, not yet increasing the pressure of his fingers yet. She frantically nodded, desperately trying to press her clit more firmly into his hand as she thrust her hips into his palm. “I need you to say it, honey. Try to talk to me, Gwyn”
“Yes,” she gasped, gripping his shoulders, her inner walls once again clenching around nothing. Every inch of her was overly sensitive, each tiny movement of his fingers like a bolt of lightning straight to her center. “More, please. Oh gods, Azriel. Please. I’m so close. I’m so close, Az.”
"That’s it, Sweetheart,” he breathed in her ear, verbally helping her along. “You’re doing so well. You’re doing so fuckingwell. Just look at how hard I am, Bird. It’s all because of you.”
She had never expected such simple praises to make her even more aroused, but his words sent her grinding erratically, all control slipping. He kept rubbing circles on her throbbing clit, nibbling at her neck with his mouth. Her moans grew louder, filling the room with her sounds of ecstasy, her fingertips digging into the skin on his back.
Pressure built in her center, heat and need and pleasure all rising until it neared a crescendo. As he continued coaxing her toward the edge, his fingers working her clit while his mouth roamed her body, she suddenly shattered, her body finally falling over the edge into an intense climax.
Pleasure exploded through her, her head falling onto his shoulder as she cried out his name while her orgasm washed over her. Wave after wave of ecstasy coursed through her, his fingers rubbing her clit as he helped her ride out the climax. Her entire body shook with the force of her release, the pleasure unlike anything she had managed on her own.
As she stopped shaking, he gently pushed her hips into him a few more times, easing her through the final moments of pleasure. A contented happiness filled her, the pressure of his hand on her core a pleasant reminder of what had just happened. She had orgasmed. She had actually done it. She could cry from how happy she was.
As her body slowly relaxed, collapsing against him, he eased his hand out from between them to stroke her back, cradling her to his chest. When her breathing evened out, he gently pulled her head back to look at her. She couldn’t bring herself to open her eyes yet, too dazed and content to do anything except revel in his soft touch. His shadows softly caressed her face, her arms, her legs - reminding her that she was safe.
“Bird, talk to me,” Azriel murmured, his voice oddly shaky. "Gwyn, please, I need you to talk to me.“
She forced herself to open her eyes, letting out a soft sigh of contentment before responding. "I’m not sure I’m capable of speech right now.”
He let out a strangled laugh, relief coloring his features at her response. “That happens sometimes.”
The flush on her cheeks deepened as she studied him, the full realization of what they had done slowly sinking in. "I wasn’t expecting that to happen,” she shyly admitted, concern clouding her happiness. “Was that okay? I know it was probably strange. I -”
He cut her off with a thorough kiss, leisurely tasting her before calmly putting her mind at rest. “It was perfect. It wasn’t strange at all. Your body reacted naturally to what you were experiencing.”
“But…I didn’t do anything for you,” she murmured, absently toying with his hair.
"I already told you, I wanted this to be about you. Besides, you did plenty,” he whispered in her ear, gently smoothing her hair down. “Having you climax in my arms was more than enough.”
She finally gave him a broad smile, her shyness disappearing at his tender words. His fingers slid along her bare thigh, bringing another small sigh of satisfaction to her lips. She was utterly and completely content.
He pulled back to look at her face again, worry clouding his features. “Are you okay though?” He asked, seeming unsure of himself. “Did I take things too far? Did you…did you enjoy yourself?”
“It was perfect,” she sighed, her eyes sparkling with delight as she leaned her forehead against his. “I enjoyed every second. You made me feel absolutely wonderful.”
“Good,” he replied, his body relaxing into her again as he tucked his face into her neck. She leaned into him, lost in the pure happiness flooding her. She couldn’t believe this was real.
"Next time, how about we try it without these on,” he quietly murmured, tugging the hem of her panties, for emphasis and drawing a giggle out of her. “Would that be okay?”
“Mmmm,” she eagerly nodded, running her hands through his silky hair. "That would very much be okay.”
He grinned, bringing his mouth to hers, then scooping her up into his arms. She let out a squeal, clinging to his shoulders while he carried her to bed. He pulled back the covers, then deposited her on the bed, letting his lips linger before pulling away. She smiled softly, her eyes darting to his throbbing erection, then back up to his face.
“Are you sure I shouldn’t…you know?” She asked, a flush coloring her cheeks again. She hated the idea that she had been utterly satiated and he was still…a bit needy. But still, she couldn’t help the touch of anxiety that hit her as she asked the question.
He shook his head, seeming to sense her nerves, as he always did. She silently thanked the gods, unsure she was ready to tackle that part of their relationship just yet. She wanted to touch him, to learn what made him feel good, but she needed to take baby steps first.
“I’m sure, Gwyneth. It’s okay,” he assured her, kissing her on the temple before backing away toward the bathing room. “I’ll take care of it. Close your eyes, I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
She nodded, settling deeper under the covers while he disappeared into his bathing room. A small part of her wished he had stayed, even knowing what he was about to do. What was he like when he came? He had already been noisier than she had been expecting earlier. Would he be even more so when he actually climaxed? Or would he bite his lip, the way he sometimes did, to muffle the sound?
She closed her eyes, her imagination filling with thoughts of Azriel, a contented smile forming as she thought of everything they had done and everything they could do. There was still so much for her to learn, to explore, to experience. She wanted all of it with Azriel. Every kiss, every touch. All of it.
Gwyn was already half dozing in bed by the time Azriel emerged, her imagination running wild while she waited for him to join her. He quietly crawled beside her, smiling when she blinked her eyes open and curled into his side, draping her leg over his.
“Better?” She murmured, tenderly kissing his jaw. He leaned into her touch, wrapping his arms around her, an adorably happy grin plastered on his face.
“Much better,” he confirmed, kissing the top of her head. She let out a happy hum, burrowing deeper against him, her head tucked into his shoulder. He sighed happily, holding her tightly to him. She would gladly stay like this forever if he wanted. It felt like home being in his arms.
“Azriel?” She whispered, her voice soft as she slowly drifted off.
“Yes, Gwyn?”
“Tonight was perfect,” she quietly said, her lips grazing the skin on his shoulder. She felt him shift slightly, but her eyes were already closed, a happy smile still on her face. He settled next to her, stroking her back while she fell asleep against him.
He quietly hummed his agreement, sleep already claiming him. She fell silent, letting her body relax in his arms. Tonight had been perfect, even better than she could possibly have dreamed. She couldn’t wait to explore more with him, to slowly learn everything he could teach her. Tonight was only the beginning.
