#hermione x narcissa
Hermione: I can’t stand you.
Narcissa:Then kneel.
Hermione:
Narcissa:Go on, bend the knee.
Hermione: The only thing I’m bending is you over a table.
Narcissa, blushing furiously:okay
Hermione’s poor secretary, witnessing the whole ordeal: Oh look there’s the door. Imma just head out before I witness something more traumatizing.
Narcissa, looking at Hermione: I think I’m having a heart attack.
Andromeda, not looking up from her book: You’re just experiencing love again.
Narcissa: It’s gross and I hate it.
Hermione:I don’t like the fact that you’re taller than me.
Narcissa:Trust me, there’s an advantage to it.
Hermione:And what is that?
Narcissa:When I hug you, you can hear my heart beating just for you. *winks*
Hermione:*blushes and mumbles* You smooth, sweet talking snake.
Narcissa at her wedding with Hermione: This is the second gayest thing I have ever done, the first one being my bride.
*Narcissa scolding their child*
Narcissa:No more turning mother’s hair to red.
Narcissa: Say it after me.
Their child: Me it.
Narcissa: [pinching the bridge of her nose] Merlin help me.
Hermione:*sniggering*
Neville: So how’s your life going, Hermione?
Hermione: Hold on a second.
Hermione: *whispers* Narcissa, how are you doing?
Narcissa, blushing: I’m doing well I suppose.
Hermione, turning back to Neville: Doing well, apparently.
Narcissa: In light of what you did today, you can hug me for four to five seconds.
Hermione: Forty-five seconds?!
Narcissa:NO! FOUR TO FI-
Hermione: [hugs Narcissa] No take backsies!
Andromeda: Wait, how do you know Narcissa is good in bed?
Harry: Hermione and I share a wall, so either Narcissa’s amazing in bed, or Hermione just likes to agree with her a lot.
Hermione, to Narcissa: Is three fingers too much?
Luna, in the same room: Not at all! Most people have ten.
Narcissa: Hermione and I are having a baby.
Harry: We figured.
Narcissa:How?
Ron: Because we saw Hermione practicing with Crookshanks earlier today.
Narcissa:Practicing?
Hermione, walking in with Crookshanks in a baby carrier with a pacifier on his mouth:Hey.
Post-war. In which the slytherin princess and the golden girl of house gryffindor accidentally cross paths back at Hogwarts and get themselves into some unexpected trouble. Lady Malfoy (“It’s Black! Lady Black!”) maintains that a lady never runs, especially not a lady in dress robes… Great.
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Oh Bellatrix…
Hermione:I’m so hungry, think I might grab a snack.
Narcissa:*not really paying attention because she’s reading a book* Hmm.
Hermione:*sinks between Narcissa’s legs and starts hiking her skirt up*
Narcissa:What are you doing?
Hermione:I said I wanted a snack.
Luna:Wow that dress is really nice.
Narcissa: Thank you, Miss Lovegood.
Luna: You know where it would look better?
Narcissa:Where?
Luna:Hermione’s bedroom floor.
Narcissa:…
Hermione: Luna! What did I say about flirting with other people for me?!
Thus, the sexual tension between them remains unresolved.
you’d need quite a bit of that gryffindor courage to kiss the most notorious witch known in all of wizarding britain
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Hermione:How are you feeling honey?
Narcissa:Fine, except this headache that comes and goes.
Bellatrix:*enters*
Narcissa: There it is again.
Hermione:Cissy, I’m saying this as your wife and someone who loves you dearly. You need to embrace your flaws.
Narcissa[stepping forward and hugging Hermione gently]: Okay
