[ 3:02 am ] The bright screen of your phone illuminated your face, the white light shining through even your window. You glanced at the time at the top of your phone, and your eyes widened.

You quickly said, “Jeno, I love you and all, but I have a calc test first thing tomorrow morning, and I need to sleep, so goodnight.”

You ended the call, looking one last time at your phone to see the simple message that made you smile.

I didnt realize how late it was already but anyways you’ll do great on that test tomorrow I love you

My Duty As Princess Masterlist

The updated version

Lee Jeno x fem reader

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview,01,02,03,04,05,06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:violence, explicit language, suggestive content, smut

Word Count: 4-6K per chapter

Synopsis: “Crown Prince Lee Jeno, of The Kingdom of Northcy, expected to marry Princess (y/n) (l/n) of The Modia Kingdom just before the new year.  The two young royals say they are just ‘doing their duty,’ as their union ends the war.  I think we can all agree this marriage will be the beginning of a new era for both kingdoms.  From myself and everyone here at channel 6 news, we congratulate the Prince and Princess.”  You watched the news anchor announce your marriage to your kingdom, ‘just doing my duty, as princess.’

Authors Note:This is the same story as the original, that just went through heavy review and editing to comeback better than ever. All of this, was possible with the help of the Amazing@urlocaltrash28 As much love as you give to me, please give to her as well.

Original Masterlist

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Taglist:@floweronacloud@cookydream@nctstrawberrycow@marklexleaf@jvjsssnaa@thejeongjaehyun@thejungjaehyun@jackyeongljin@terjeno@tyongf-sunflower99@tgnctzen131@gooreumic@jenotation@nctdom@ficklehoe@itsveronicaxxx@actually-vl@her33n@tomorrowbymoa-together@bangtan-jam

My Duty As Princess

Chapter 02

Lee Jeno x fem reader

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview,01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:violence, explicit language, suggestive content, smut

Word Count: 6.1K

Authors Note: I know I said this is gonna be updated every saturday and this is the second time that I updated on a sunday, I’m sorry guys. This weekend just wasn’t it for me. I’ll do better, I’m sorry. hugs and kisses to anyone reading <333

OH I FORGOT TO TELL YOU GUYS THERES NEW SCENES IN THIS CHAPTER LOL

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Finally, you lay in your bed; you finished getting the Na family settled. There was Lord Na, and his wife Lady Na. The lord was the brother of the queen, and their parents also came. They insisted you call them Grandfather Na and Grandmother Na, instead of their names. Then Lord Na’s son, Na Jaemin.

When escorting the Na family to their chambers, you experienced a few minutes alone with the infamous Na Jaemin. The tales of Na Jaemin have made it around the palace more than once. As soon as the maids heard about the early arrival of the Na family, the talk was nonstop.

According to Fei and Mei, Na Jaemin was a ‘whore,’ a ‘flirt,’ the ‘ultimate playboy.’ The paparazzi of Northcy would picture Jaemin with a different girl on the weekly. There’s even the rumor that Jaemin doesn’t have a preference. When you saw him, his smile, the way he walked, how he talked, you understood. Jaemin always had his head tilted a little to the right. Whenever you spoke, he made direct eye contact. It was captivating, memorizing, it made sense why men and women praised the ground he walked on.

“You’re very beautiful, princess,” Jaemin said to you when you escorted him to his chambers, “my cousin is a lucky man.”

Those are the words that you thought about as you slept.

-

A luncheon with Grandmother Na, Lady Na, and the Queen, is where you sat at the moment: the middle of the palace’s private garden, wearing a peach tea length satin dress, across from Lady Na. She wore a shin-length straight skirt, that was a lavender color, a simple off-white straight-neck lined blouse, tucked into her skirt. She kept her head down during the majority of the luncheon, refusing to look the Queen directly in the eye. The queen never addressed Lady Na either, rather speaking to Grandmother Na.

“Jaeyeon, this isn’t your wedding, allow the girl to speak,” Grandmother Na spoke in a scolding tone, looking at her daughter disapprovingly.

“It’s quite alright, Grandmother Na,” you started, unsure what else to say. You preferred not to talk about the wedding at all, still hoping for a way out of this union.

“Well, it is your wedding, after all, you do have a say in this right?” Grandmother Na asked.

“Of course, Grandmother Na,” is what you opted to say, instead of ‘of course not. If I had any say, this wouldn’t be happening, if I had a say I would not be here. If I had a say this would never have even been an option.’

The queen had seemed to pick up on your discomfort of the topic, opting to change it. “How is home, mother?” The Queen looked to her mother with what appeared to be hopeful eyes.

“Home is just alright. Jennie has started a charity, the first event will take place just before the new year,” Grandmother Na said looking at Lady Na, her head remained lowered, though.

“This is the first I am hearing about this, I hope you didn’t plan to not invite me,” the Queen said, her voice sounding condescending as ever. It was like Queen Jaeyeon was becoming a different person before your eyes.

“Of course, you’re invited, Your Majesty, I would never purposely leave you out,” Lady Na spoke, her eyes not meeting the queen’s. It was obvious Queen Jaeyeon didn’t like her sister-in-law.

“By my name, must you act so high and mighty, Na Jaeyeon?” Grandmother Na spoke out, the same scolding tone returning just much worse this time around. “Jennie has done nothing but try to earn your approval, and nothing she ever does seems to meet the criteria. She was your lady-in-waiting for your wedding, didn’t ask for anything during her wedding, waited until after it was confirmed that you were pregnant to get pregnant. Shas continued to do good work while taking care of me and your father, as well as making your brother happy. The least you can do is pretend to like her for one lunch.” Grandmother Na slammed her hands down on the table looking at her daughter furiously.

After Grandmother Na finished her rant, the queen was red in the face, the anger clearly evident. Lady Na was the first to speak, after an overly extended amount of silence, “If you don’t mind, I shall excuse myself.”

“No, we don’t mind,” Grandmother Na huffed out, her eyes still trained on Queen Jaeyeon. “My dear princess (Y/n), please escort Lady Na back to her chambers,” Grandmother Na said, looking at you softly.

“Of course.”

-

You and Lady Na walked towards the grand staircase, up to the second level. The majority of the bedrooms remained on that level. Lady Na kept her eyes trained on the floor, almost like a maid would. The outfit she wore was too simple to be considered classy, it was too commoner-like. Her hands looked rough, like a laborer’s hands. Her skin seemed aged, too dry in certain areas and littered with sunspots. It was all too clear: Lady Na didn’t come from a prominent family; she was a civilian.

“I was a maid,” Lady Na spoke, almost as if she could hear the revelation you made in your mind. “I worked for the Na family. I arrived at their house when I was 14. My parents died in an accident. There was no money set aside for me, and the job of a maid comes with housing as well as food. When I went to work, Joon was only 16, and I didn’t try to weasel my way into a better life. I was content being a maid. I certainly wasn’t overjoyed with the idea of working, cleaning up after two spoiled brats, but I made peace with it. I had a job, a way of making money, I had a place to sleep and I had food, I was content. Joon and I didn’t start getting close until after Jaeyeon was engaged to the Crown Prince at the time. She left home and Joon didn’t have his best friend. He turned to the maid that was there from before. I didn’t seduce him to buy a ticket to an easy life. I love every part of my husband and no matter what Jaeyeon tells you, even if Joon had nothing, I would still love him.” Lady Na looked at you. She was tired, tired of trying to please an unpleasable woman. You feared your future would look similar. Will you become tired of trying to please Queen Jaeyeon?

By the time Lady Na finished, you were already outside of her chamber doors. “I apologize for my outburst, you didn’t deserve that,” she spoke to you. Before you could even think of a response, she was already shutting the door, leaving you to your thoughts: a maid has married the brother of the queen. That must’ve made quite the headline for the papers and evening news.

Slowly, make your way to your bedroom. It seemed as if now you never saw Fei or Mei. The two of them often moved in silence, seemingly coming out of the shadows when you needed them. They were nearby, though; you could feel their presence. As you neared, it looked as if someone was waiting by your door. It most definitely wasn’t your two guards, for it seemed like even Chan and Hyunjin got busy, leaving you more lonely than ever, even in a palace full of people. It was Jaemin, Jaemin stood outside of your doors, hands behind his back, looking towards the ceiling.

“Something interesting up there?” you asked, standing next to Jaemin, now looking at the ceiling.

“Ah, princess, I was wondering if I could have a private word with you?” Jaemin asked, looking at you, with the head tilt and direct eye contact.

“What would you like to discuss?”

“Privately, please,” Jaemin said, gesturing towards your doors. He wore tight white pants, with black boots that went over his pants, and a long-sleeved button-up tucked in, a pair of black gloves in one hand; you inferred he was just returning from a horse ride. ‘Jaemin and I are racing tomorrow morning,’ was what Jeno said the night before at dinner.

“Very well.”

-

Jaemin and you sat at the table placed in front of the large window. Fei had brought in a freshly brewed tea, shortly after she saw you enter your room. Jaemin sipped his tea, admiring the view of the courtyard, his head tilting side to side often.

“Do you want to marry Jeno?” Jaemin blurted out, now looking at you. No, Jaemin’s gaze was reaching deeper: he wasn’t looking at you, but looking into you, into your soul, your heart of hearts. “I am asking you as the cousin of your fiance, and I want you to answer me as my cousin’s fiance. Not Princess (Y/n) of the Modia Kingdom, but just (Y/n).”

“No, I do not want to marry Jeno.”

“Alright, I’ll make the arrangements,” Jaemin said, getting up from his seat making his way out of your chambers.

“Excuse me? Arrangements? What are you talking about?” You asked as you stood to follow Jaemin.

“My cousin doesn’t want to be married and neither do you, so I will make arrangements to get you out of this palace and on a flight back home in one week. We shall be in contact, princess.” Jaemin said, exiting the room, leaving you in utter shock. Can Jaemin possibly do that? Have you on a plane back home in a week? Technically, you could get yourself on a plane back home; it’s not like anyone was holding you hostage.

-

Before the arrival of the Na family, days bled into each other; meetings always seemed to overlap. Now that the Na family was here, it seemed as if the days dragged on longer and longer. Your lunchtime was always with a new person from the Na family.

Lunch with Grandmother Na was filled with stories from Jeno and Jaemin’s childhood. Apparently, those two were thick as thieves, always running around the palace, pulling absurd pranks, and causing trouble. Haechan played with them often.

Lunch with Lady Na was more filled with advice on what to do after the wedding: how to act, talk, walk and dress around the family. You felt pity for Lady Na; she never lived up to the expectations, and all she wanted was to feel like she belonged to the family.

Grandfather Na told stories of his time in the war. Lunch with him was the most unbearable. He spoke of his triumphs, the battles he won, the people he’s killed. Many of which were your people: the men and women you swore to protect, the people that willingly gave their lives to defend. By the time lunch was over with Grandfather Na, you felt sick to your stomach and tears flowed freely down your face. You even refused to go down for dinner, unable to sit and dine with that man. Rumor has it grandmother Na gave scolding to him, but the words were already spoken.

Lunch with Jaemin was filled with the plan to get you out of the country. You were to leave the palace at midnight and drive to a private airstrip, owned by Lord Huang, who apparently owed Jaemin a favor. There you would board a private plane that will fly to Teraha. In Teraha, you would spend a year traveling across the country eventually crossing the border into Modia. By that time, the union between you and Jeno will have been dissolved and you would no longer be “missing.”

“It’s perfect, princess. You would have been missing from Northcy for an entire year. There’s no way they would hold you to a year-old union. And if you’re unsure, you could always extend your missing period. If I didn’t believe in this plan, I wouldn’t have suggested it, Your Highness.”

“Are you sure, Jaemin?”

“Of course, I am, princess. The biggest issue isn’t what to do when you leave the country, it’s how to leave the country unseen. Luckily for you, I can provide passage out of the country undetected.”

Jaemin’s plan left you wondering if you truly could escape, leave this unwanted marriage? Have freedom? No one said you had to be “found”; you could pull out enough cash and exchange it for Teraha currency, to at least start a life there. There’s no doubt that as soon as you left Northcy, you could survive and not have to go back.

-

The day finally came. That morning, after Fei and Mei helped you dress, you made your way to breakfast with Lady Na, Grandmother Na, and the queen. There was more talk of wedding arrangements and guest seating. The conversation seemingly dwelled on and on, and you weren’t taking much interest in it.

You stared at Lady Na. She was perfect in every way: she was respectful when speaking about every member of the family, she never said anything outrageous, and chose all her words carefully. Even here at breakfast, she acted perfectly, her eyes trained downward, not to make direct contact with anyone unless warranted, she didn’t speak unless spoken to. Many probably wouldn’t even notice her presence. You wondered, is this how it would be as Jeno’s wife? Would you be expected to be perfect? The thoughts made Jaemin’s plans insatiably tempting: the idea of running far far away, living freely.

After setting up a life, you would write to Chan, under a name only he would know. He would find you and you guys would be free, free to live happily ever after. It seemed all too simple, too easy.

-

Finally, the sun set and you were back in your private chambers. You sent Mei and Fei away for the night already. You slipped a note to Chan, explaining you needed him for a midnight escapade. Chan was to meet you at the back garage of the palace, at exactly ten to midnight.

You grabbed a leather duffel bag out of the closet, throwing in a week’s worth of clothes inside, along with certain necessities. You change out of your pajamas, into something warmer and more appropriate for a midnight escape.

Earlier in the day, Jaemin slipped a note into your chambers, explaining the route to the airstrip. Note in one hand and bag in the other, you made your way down to the garage, and already there Chan was. He was in casual clothing: a pair of dark blue jeans, a hoodie, and a leather jacket thrown over.

“What is this midnight escapade you have me going on?” He asked, looking you up and down.

“I’ll explain, first get in.”

The two of you got in the car, you driving, and him riding passenger. Chan thought back to summer nights in Modia. You were restless some nights, so Chan would sneak you out of the palace and take you to car meets that he and some of his friends would attend. That’s where you first learned to drive, where you first did a street race, where you first ran away from the police. You were a different person in Modia, a different person before the third letter.

As you finished explaining what was going on, you pulled up to the airstrip. “My princess, are you sure about this?” Chan asked you as you both got out of the car to exchange seats. “I wouldn’t see this version of you doing this.” He came to your side of the car as you stood right outside the door.

“I was sure, but being here, I don’t know anymore,” you said. You are no longer who you were back in Modia. It was like when you go out and then all of a sudden life is drained from you and you just wanna curl up in bed. You were so excited, almost jumping out of your seat during lunch with Lord Na today, just aching to escape and be gone. You were prepared, ready for a new life. But now, being here, Jaemin and the plane ready to take you away in front of you, you weren’t so certain.

“Whatever choice you make, my princess, you shall always have my support,” Chan offers with a genuine smile and knowing eyes. Unable to form words of gratitude, a simple nod being all you could manage.

You made your way to Jaemin, stopping right in front of him. “Are you ready, princess? Lidia will meet you when you land, she’ll get you situated in Teraha with identification to help you get around the country. Teraha has been a neutral territory since the start of the war, so there’s no need to worry if someone picks up on your accent.”

“I can’t,” you start, Jaemin’s mention of the war throws you back to reality. This marriage, this union between you and Jeno was ending a century-old war. You wondered how you could have such selfish thoughts. With the alliance being freshly formed, there’s no telling what would happen if you were to disappear. Northcy could declare war on Modia for not honoring the union, Modia could declare war for losing the only heir. Mother and father would be absolutely devastated, they would think they lost all of their children. Not to mention your responsibilities, your people, your country. How could you ever think to turn your back on them?

“I’m sorry, Jaemin. I know this must’ve been a lot of work for you, but I can’t. I can’t run away from my responsibilities,” you said to the boy in front of you. He looked confused as if he didn’t understand the words coming out of your mouth.

“You’re gonna marry Prince Jeno, princess?”

“I am… it’s my responsibility to my people,” you said with a sigh.

“You will be an unhappy princess,” Jaemin said with a firm look. He didn’t agree with your decision. “You will be alone, in a marriage with a man you don’t love. Your maids and guards will be sent back to Modia, you will have no one. You will be unhappy.”

“Yes,” you breathed, pausing, unsure how to continue, “yes I will be unhappy, but isn’t it worth it? My unhappiness for thousands of lives? I will be unhappy and alone in Northcy, but I will save thousands of people, my people… it is worth it to me.“ You turned and began to walk away from Jaemin, back to the car where Chan sat, waiting to see your decision.

When you got in the car, the tears flowed freely, never stopping the entire ride to the palace. Chan placed one hand on your thigh and another on the driving wheel. You were painfully aware of what you’ve done to yourself, how you nailed your coffin shut. There was no turning back now.

“I’m proud of you, my princess,” Chan said, pulling your hand to his lips, placing a chaste kiss.

-

Jaemin stood there, watching the car the princess got in to drive away back towards the palace. He spoke into the walkie-talkie that he pulled out of his back pocket, “stand down, guard.”

Jaemin was never gonna let the princess escape. The plan was to entice the princess with the idea of escaping the impending marriage, allow her a way to get out of the country and when she boards the plane, palace guards will be there to restrain her and the union would have been broken. She would have been caught trying to willingly escape, going back on the union, allowing Northcy to invade the rest of Modia.

Jaemin wanted the princess to turn his proposition away, but he wasn’t hopeful for it. Nevertheless, Jaemin left the airstrip glad you turned him away, glad that you wouldn’t be held prisoner in Northcy, glad that you were going back.

-

Jeno paced his room back and forth awaiting news. The idea of catching the princess trying to escape was Jeno’s idea. He didn’t want to rule Northcy, he didn’t want to get married, so if the princess was caught trying to escape and go back on the union, that would throw his father for a loop. The union would be postponed, alliances would have to be renegotiated, Northcy wouldn’t enter a time of peace, and his father would stay on the throne. The ringing of Jeno’s phone pulled him from his thoughts. A picture of Jeno and Jaemin appeared on the screen, it was from a ski trip a few years back.

“Hello? Jaems, is she on the plane?” Jeno spoke into the walkie-talkie.

“You owe me ten Mons, dear cousin,” Jaemin replied.

“You’re kidding me, right? She didn’t get on? Did you tell her she was gonna be unhappy here?”

“I did, and she said it was worth it: her unhappiness was worth thousands of lives, thousands of her people’s lives.”

Jeno ended the conversation there, opting to quickly tell him to return to the palace and make sure no one heard of the event. Jeno didn’t like the princess, not one bit, but he sure as hell respected her. He respected the decision she made, the responsibilities she took on, the role she lives in. He wasn’t planning on making this marriage work, but he decided that he wasn’t gonna make life difficult for the princess. He sat on his bed and decided that he’d do whatever she needed to make her comfortable in the foreign environment.

-

To say Taeyong was unhappy with his younger brother would be an understatement. He had just seen the boy clearly protective of his fiance, and now he was doing beyond foolish things without enough thought. If their father would’ve heard about it, he would be livid, and that’s a sight no one wanted to see.

As soon as he found out that the event was organized by them, he went to knock on Jeno’s chamber door immediately. It wasn’t a hard knock, nothing that made his frustration obvious.

The door swings open, Jeno looking confused at the appearance of Taeyong. He was still thinking of how he could make things up to the princess, albeit without admitting any fault. “Hello?”

“Lee Jeno, you should be ashamed of yourself,” he starts the scolding right away, walking past the boy and into his room.

“What? Yong, what’re you even talking about?”

“You trying to trick the princess into abandoning the kingdom, you fool!” He exclaims. His eyes weren’t angry but no longer had the puppy-like innocence in them. Frustration was the main emotion visible to Jeno. “Why would you do such a thing?”

Jeno’s eyes widened. “H-how did you even hea-”

“Do you genuinely forget that I am the general of our army?” He sighs, rubbing his face. He didn’t expect this conversation to be filled with explanations. The fact that Jeno was clueless about everything was wearing Taeyong’s patience thinner by the second.

“Oh… yeah.”

“So tell me. Why?”

“W-well,” he pauses, feeling like a scolded child, “we both want out of the union, so it would be a simple fix.”

“Jeno… are you still a boy? I thought you were a man!”

“I am a man!”

“Men don’t do such foolish things!”

“Don’t act like I was being selfish; she wanted it too.”

“And that’s why she turned you down?”

Jeno opens his mouth to respond but Taeyong doesn’t let him. “What if she would’ve said yes? What if your plans went well? Do you think that, after she is imprisoned, she wouldn’t rat you out? The woman would have nothing to lose, and would likely want to get revenge. It was a direct back-stabbing before she’s proven she deserves anything of the sort.”

Jeno didn’t have anything to say to that; Taeyong made points he didn’t even think of. His mouth stayed pressed into a firm line. When Taeyong noticed he wasn’t going to argue, he sighs. “Jeno, I love you, but I sincerely hope you never do something this stupid ever again. Now go to bed.” And like that, he was gone.

-

The next morning came, your head aching from all the crying you did. You remembered laying in Chan’s arms crying as you two lay in bed, unsure of when you stopped or when you fell asleep. Chan wasn’t in your bed anymore and it was probably best he wasn’t, but that didn’t mean you didn’t wish he was. Fei and Mei made their way into your room, helping you dress. They ignored your puffy eyes and pale look, but you knew they knew. To anyone else, nothing seems out of the ordinary, but you knew better, you knew Fei and Mei.

You had breakfast privately in your chambers, grateful that no one called you down to eat; you wanted to do nothing but hide away in your chambers, curl into bed and watch the world around you fall into a black abyss. You pushed the food around, unable to bring the fork up to your mouth because nothing seemed to appeal to you.

“Take it away,” you said to Mei as she stood in the corner watching you with sad eyes. Fei just joined her side, having finished setting the bed.

“Yes, your Highness,” as Mei made her way to clean up your plate, there was a knock at your door.

“Send them away, I don’t wish to see anyone right now,” you said with a dead look.

“Yes, Your Highness,” Fei answered, she gave Mei a worried look, this was how you acted when the third letter came home. Fei made her way to the door and opened it to see Prince Jeno standing on the other side. Mei quickly made her way past Fei, carrying the tray of food out the door.

“Oh, perfect. The princess finished breakfast already,” Jeno said, pushing his way past Fei into your chambers. You stood against the windows looking down onto the courtyard, there were children down there playing, they were servants’ children. “Princess?”

You turned around to see Jeno standing there, with hopeful eyes. You didn’t have the energy for this, you needed time to mourn the loss of a what-if life. “Fei, I said I didn’t want to see anyone right now.”

“I apologize, Your Highness,” she turns to the man, “I am sorry, Prince Jeno, but now isn’t a good time.”

Jeno looked at you utterly confused, you weren’t doing anything, why would this be a bad time?

“Fei, leave us,” Jeno said with authority laced in his voice.

“Yes, Your Highness.” Now it was your turn to look confused; your maids never took orders from Jeno, they always looked for your approval before acting, but Fei quickly made her way to the door, not even sparing you a second glance.

“Princess, what is the issue?” Jeno asked, taking a stride to close the gap between you two.

“Your Highness, I am completely fine, there is no issue. Now is just not a good time.”

Jeno showed lots of emotion in his eyes, but so did you. For royals trained to not allow anyone to know what they thought, the eyes gave both you and your fiance away.

“I do not believe that, princess, would you like to try again?” Jeno was intimidating standing so close to you. You looked away not wishing to meet his gaze.

“Jeno, please,” you sighed, not wanting to do this right now.

“Alright, princess, but I need you to follow me.”

“Why?” you asked but Jeno ignored your question, grabbing your hand, lacing your fingers together, pulling you out of the room. Taken aback, you stared at your hand laced together with Jeno’s, it was odd how the two fit so perfectly together, almost made for each other.

As the two of you left your chambers, Chan and Hyunjin stared at you two, unsure if they should follow. After a moment they both followed you and the prince, Chan looked down to your hand, his heart hurting at the sight. Jeno had pulled you into his own chambers which were down the hall from your own. Chan and Hyunjin stopped and posted guard outside the door. The ache in Chan’s heart grew as each second passed on.

Jeno’s private chambers were similar to your own but larger and darker. The walls were painted a dark gray, there was a balcony, the floor was littered with books here and there.

There was a couch in the middle, across the wall held a TV as well as what looked to be several game consoles. Spoiled, you thought to yourself, the prince had many toys to keep himself occupied. In between the couch and tv there sat a nice wood coffee table, on top, a large package. Jeno gestured towards the package, “for you,” was all he said.

You took a step, closely examining the package. It was a puppy. A small Doberman puppy. The shock was all too evident on your face. You picked up the small gleaming puppy and held, what you assumed he, close to your chest. “Hi there, do you have a name?” you asked looking for a dog tag on the collar. “What is the meaning of this?” you said, looking towards Jeno, the dead look no longer present.

“I heard you had a dog, back home in Modia. This won’t ever be home for you, princess, but I hope this gift can offer some semblance of home,” Jeno said looking straight into you, just as Jaemin did only a little over a week ago. “You can name him what you want, it is a boy,” Jeno said, confirming your suspicions.

“Thank you, Jeno,” you said. Although your dog back home wasn’t a Dobermann, it was the idea that Jeno tried to make this new place a little homey that warmed your heart. Now turning to look at the puppy in your arms, “What should we call you, boy? Does your dad have any suggestions?” you asked, turning to look at Jeno not realizing what you said.

Jeno looked at you shocked, quickly recovering, “I don’t know, what about Gae?”

“No, no, Ilio?” you suggested.

“No way, Inu?”

“No,” you gave Jeno a disgusted look, “it needs to be a strong name,” you said as you sat down on the couch placing the puppy on your lap, Jeno sitting next to you petting the puppy.

“King?” Jeno suggested with a chuckle.

“Sarge?” Jeno grimaced at your suggestion.

“Hades,” Jeno said, looking at the dog, it was no longer a suggestion.

“Hades,” you repeated, have chosen a name for the Doberman puppy that sat in your lap. You and Jeno spent the rest of your morning in his chambers playing with the dog. He got the dog plenty of toys to play with and plenty of doggy treats as well. Apparently, Jeno left the place early this morning and went down to the city to get the puppy and all his stuff. After hours of you and Jeno playing with the dog, you thought about how, maybe, this union wouldn’t be as bad as you imagined.

-

You laid on the couch, the puppy curled up next to you, taking a nap. Your eyes felt heavy as well. Jeno sat on the floor, back against the couch. There was a movie playing on the tv but you were too tired to try to pay attention. Jeno looked over his shoulder, looking at the puppy curled next to you, hoping that this would be enough for you for right now. There was a knock at the door, pulling Jeno from his thoughts and to his feet. The knock startled you awake, now sitting up. Jeno made sure you were presentable for a guest before opening the door.

“Come in,” Jeno’s voice was cold, calculated, borderline strained.

The door pushed open to reveal Jaemin and Haechan, the two making their way into the room. Jaemin dressed simply wearing jeans and some sneakers, with a hoodie on top. Haechan dressed a little more formally, having jeans, with sneakers but instead of a hoodie, he wore a nice dress shirt. “What is going on here?” Haechan asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Jeno,” You started, stopping to correct your mistake, “Prince Jeno, gave me a very generous gift,” you slightly bowed your head, showing the dog to the two others.

“(Y/n), relax. It’s just us; no need to be so formal,” Jaemin offered with a smirk, the head tilted to the right and the direct eye contact. Heat was rising up Jeno’s spine at his cousin’s blatant flirting.

“What do you two need?” Jeno’s question comes out a bit too rough, even causing you to slightly flinch at the tone.

Jaemin smirked, clearly seeing the effect his flirting has, “we were just wondering where you were; you didn’t attend breakfast this morning and you already missed lunch with the General. He wanted to see you, considering he won’t be back until the wedding.”

“What time is it?” Jeno asked, looking for a clock frantically.

“He left already, he assumed you were upset about what he said at yesterday’s outing,” Haechan responded to Jeno. Jeno was aware that more happened to cause the misunderstanding than what the other boys knew.

“Damn it,” was all Jeno said as he ran a hand over his face, not realizing he missed seeing his brother off. Jeno then turned to you, “I’m sorry princess, I must leave you now, feel free to stay as long as you please.”

All you could do was shake your head no, trying to tell Jeno not to worry about you. Jeno walked to the door, Haechan offered a small smile and a wave, while Jaemin shoved his hands in his pockets and gave you a knowing smirk. The three of them exit the room, leaving you and Hades alone.

You looked around the room, this was the first time you were ever in Jeno’s room. His room held some semblance of personality. There was a desk in front of the balcony doors, and a trophy case on one side of the room next to the double doors that opened up to the sleeping area. Jeno’s desk held a framed picture of him and his brothers, and another framed picture of him and a girl. She was stunningly beautiful, shorter than the prince, with long, sleek raven-colored hair. Her figure was thin but she had a nice tanned complexion. It was like everything you wanted to look like was embodied in one person.

You didn’t even know this girl and already you didn’t like her; you didn’t like that she was everything you wanted to be. You didn’t like that her picture sat on Jeno’s desk. You didn’t like that Jeno looked at her and not you when he worked. What is wrong with you, you thought. Why do you care, why are you so jealous? You know that there was seriously no reason to not like this girl.

“Gosh, (Y/n). Get a hold of yourself, you don’t even like him,” you muttered to yourself, moving away from the pictures, to the paperwork on the desk. There was a document that caught your eye. ‘Accommodations for the Modia Princess,’ the top line read. You scanned the paper, it was a list of accommodations that needed to be made to ensure your comfort here in Northcy. It wasn’t until you reached the bottom of the document that you were seriously confused. The document was written by the prince and was awaiting approval from the queen.

“Why would he make a list of things for me?” You muttered to yourself once again.

Among further investigation, or snooping, as your older sister would say, you came across yet another picture showing just Jeno and a girl. This one, however, put a feeling in your tummy which was far from jealousy. It was confusion, sadness, and a bit of anger. The girl was strikingly similar in features to Jeno. Same sharp eyes, straight, pink lips, prominent and charming nose. Blood-related. It couldn’t have been more obvious. Jeno had a sister which he never mentioned. He had told you scandalous facts of his family history, but he left her out. Why? What did she do to deserve this? What could be more inappropriate than his father impregnating a maid?

Hades interrupted your thoughts by coming to paw at your feet. You picked up the dog holding him against your chest. “Aren’t you a spoiled boy? Yes, yes you are,” you spoke in the baby voice to the dog. “Let’s go take you for a walk.”

You went to the basket that sat on the coffee tables filled with all of Hades’ things. Finding a leash, you attach it to the dog’s collar, exiting the room. There you found Chan and Hyunjin standing guard. “Look at my new gift,” you told the two.

“Very nice, princess,” Hyunjin said to you. You walked, Chan and Hyunjin were on your trail and you walked the palace halls, letting the puppy see everything.

—————-

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My Duty As Princess

Chapter 01

Lee Jeno x fem reader

preview,01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:violence, explicit language, suggestive content

Word Count:8.8K

Author’s Note: I am so sorry, Idk what possessed me to think that this was Saturday and not Sunday. BUT ITS BACK. MDAP is back, this is the revised version in collab with @urlocaltrash28 and far warning this is the longest chapter in the entire series, it’s really just because this chapter is the set up for the story. I am so sorry again that this is a day late, I really thought it was saturday and not sunday. anyway, hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

—————–

The trip from the north airstrip to the Northcy palace was a ten-hour flight and another hour-long car ride. The Princess arrived at Northcy’s Norhall Palace after a total of twelve hours’ worth of travel in the middle of the night. The only people there to greet her were the queen herself, and four maids.

“My dear, you must be exhausted, please hurry inside,” the queen said. She was a stunning and slim woman. She wore a rich navy blue jumpsuit, with a white long-sleeved coat that hemmed at her ankles. At the top of her head, there was a stunning silver crown, a sign of her being the queen. Although anyone could tell she was the queen by the way she carried herself. She held her head high and stood upright with proper posture. The queen and the four maids led you to your chambers. “You may wash up and when you’re done, Princess. One of the handmaids will inform me, that way I can personally see to it, that you have a meal before you rest,” the queen told you.

“Thank you, Your Majesty,” you said as you bowed to the queen. Your two maids helped you undress and bathe as four of the queen’s maids made you some tea and prepared your clothing for the evening. The two guards stood outside the chamber doors because technically, you were still in enemy territory until the marriage.

After your bath, the queen herself escorted you to a private dining hall. The queen was about to have your maids be escorted elsewhere to eat, but you insisted they eat with you. The two maids, being Fei and Mei, were sisters from a family that has served your kingdom for generations. They have always taken care of you from the mere age of nine, when your parents decided it was time to have help. Although it was evident the queen didn’t agree, she allowed the maids to sit and dine with you. You assumed that the queen went to bed right after settling you in with the food.

“Breakfast shall be set in the garden courtyard. There you’ll meet the prince and the king,” the queen informed you.

-

As the queen made her way to her own chambers, she saw her son. He was pacing in front of her doors. “My boy, it’s very late, you should be fast asleep,” the queen said.

“Mother,” Jeno called out then turned to her maids, “please leave us.”

The queen nodded her head, permitting the maids to leave her side. “What is it, my dear?” The queen asked as Jeno walked with her into her room. Jeno gathered the tea set and poured his mother a cup as she sat down.

“Do you truly expect me to marry that girl, mother?” Jeno asked. “An alliance could be negotiated without marriage. That girl offers nothing of value to our kingdom or family. There are plenty of women within this council that would make a much better bride.” Jeno sighed; he barely wanted to be married, least of all married to a princess he didn’t know at all. “Mother, you can’t seriously think marrying princess (Y/N) is any good for anyone.”

Hearing her son complain about a girl he’s never met gave the queen a headache. The queen once met Princess (Y/N) long ago, during a summit meeting to discuss the end of the war. The little girl at the time was maybe only nine or ten years old, but she was far wiser than any other children the queen had ever met. Princess (Y/N) is only three years younger than her son and when the queen met the little girl on a visit to the Modia kingdom, she knew that princess (Y/N) would be a fine monarch.

“I do expect you to marry her, and I do think she be great, not only for our family but for Northcy as well,” the queen told her son. “So I expect you to be up early and be eager to meet the princess tomorrow morning”

“Mother, you’re kidding, right? You want me to wine and dine Princess (Y/n), the stubborn, unwavering princess that never once cared about her title?” Jeno asked the queen with a look of disbelief on his face.

“I am not kidding, Crown Prince Lee Jeno, and I expect you to be at breakfast prepared to meet your future bride. I expect there to be no complaints from you at all tomorrow morning,” the queen said standing up to dismiss her son out of the room. “Do I make myself clear?”

Jeno knew that whenever his mother addressed him by his proper title he was in trouble. “Yes mother, you have made yourself clear,” Jeno answered grudgingly, knowing he had lost this argument.

“Very well, good night my son.”

-

The sun rose bright and early the next morning. The princess made her way to the courtyard for breakfast with her maids and guards. Fei and Mei always trailed the princess, never standing in her way, while her two guards always led the princess, never allowing anything to touch her without permission. The two guards that the princess brought refused to leave her side. Even though there was an alliance between all the kingdoms, people could still have grudges against the princess.

“People will gossip if you two don’t leave me be,” the princess told her guards.

“My princess, we will be executed if anything were to happen to you, following you wherever you go is the best way to ensure that doesn’t happen,” stated the princess’ personal guard, Bang Chan. He joined the army at the fresh age of 18, became the princess’ personal guard at 20, fell in love with the princess at 22, and he is now 24. Fei, Mei, Chan, the other guard, Hyunjin, and the princess were all friends; they have basically spent the past three years together. The princess was only ever alone for a few minutes, when she lay in bed, in the middle of the night, before sleep consumed her.

“Princess (Y/n),” the queen called out, getting up from her seat at the breakfast as she saw the princess approach the pavilion. “Come, dear. Take a seat. You can dismiss your guards and handmaids.”

“Very well, Your Majesty,” the princess said as she dismissed the handmaids and guards, taking her seat. She gave them a look telling them to not make a scene. The princess and the queen began to chat amongst themselves. They were not allowed to start eating until the rest of the party arrived.

“My dear, maybe tomorrow you can come by my room and try on your wedding dress,” the queen told the princess.

“Wedding dress?” The princess asked, nearly choking on air “I mean no disrespect, Your Majesty, but don’t think you it’s too soon? I haven’t even met the prince.”

“Never too soon, and it doesn’t matter because you’ll meet my son right now,” And that’s when reality set in for the princess, she was in enemy territory, meeting her fiance. Prince Jeno and the King made their way to the pavilion to sit and dine for breakfast.

The rest of breakfast went by in a blur for the princess didn’t speak unless questions were directed towards her; not many questions were. The king was kind but not very welcoming, just because the war was over didn’t mean all the problems were solved in the country. He still had many issues to tackle, especially with a wedding approaching and the two kingdoms alliance still fresh. Jeno remained quiet for the majority of breakfast because he didn’t want to anger his mother. That would only enrage his father and no one wanted to see an angry king. The queen tried her very best to get everyone to speak, but it didn’t work out as well as she had hoped.

The king had already left the table and just as Jeno was getting ready to leave, his mother called out. “Jeno, why don’t you take the princess and show her around Norhall, it’s her first day here,” Jeno was getting ready to argue with his mother until he saw the stern look in her eye.

“Yes mother,” Jeno answered. He looked almost pained to say yes.

-

You and Jeno walked around the palace in awkward silence as he pointed things out to you here and there. Jeno wore a simple pair of black dress pants and a light blue button-up dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His black hair was tousled, almost looking like he just rolled out of bed. The two of you entered a room that you could assume to be the palace library. It was something that was straight out of movies; the walls were lined with books from ceiling to floor.

“You don’t talk much, do you?” Jeno asked as you ran your hands across a shelf of books. Some of the books looked to be written in a language of Modia that was long forgotten.

“I was raised to only speak when spoken to, my father was keen to traditions,” you stated. Reading wasn’t something you found yourself doing often, but a desire to stay here and bury yourself into an enriching tale was there.

“Traditions? Something like women are only meant to be child-bearers?” Jeno asked with a quaint smirk. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone, in any kingdom, that the Modia royals were traditional. Many things were considered unladylike, therefore disallowing your participation.

“Yes and no,” the princess started. “Growing up, men and women were equal to each other, but they had different goals to accomplish. A woman was to bear a child, to continue a king’s rule, a man was to provide a just and safe kingdom for his children.”

The rest of the tour was met with silence; Jeno continued to point out things to you and when the two arrived at your chambers, Jeno bid you a farewell until the evening meal, almost looking to be relieved to be done.

The princess’ comment on how she was raised stuck in Jeno’s mind. Was that all a king was meant to do, make a just and safe kingdom? Was that all the princess expected from him? No fairytale romance? No faithful, supporting husband kind of stuff? If ensuring the kingdom’s safety and the justice system was all she expected, Jeno could fulfill those expectations before an earth’s orbit.

-

The days bled into each other and winter was approaching fast; it had already been a month into the princess’ stay in the Northcy kingdom. Being this far north from the equator, the days started to get chillier. By the time winter came, the kingdom would have already seen snow.

Being from Modia, a tropical climate, the princess was excited for winter to approach because she had never seen snow before. However, the princess was not prepared for the chill of the approaching winter. When the winter comes and the snow falls, the princess will be constantly shivering due to the cold.

Ever since the first day of the princess’ arrival to the Northcy kingdom, her daily duties have been filled as well as Jeno’s. Jeno was already a member of the council as Crown Prince, for he needed to be fully aware of the duties as a king before ascending the throne. The princess was busy familiarizing herself with the kingdom and its departments as this would be her new home. Not to mention the wedding was to take place exactly two months from now, just before the new year.

There was much to do, and there wasn’t nearly enough time to complete all of the tasks. You spent most of your time with the queen, learning about the council members and their families. You already held a vast knowledge of the council of the Modia kingdom. Back home there were ten high houses while only three of the houses held any power, and the other seven were just for show. However, Jeno’s future council held 18 different noble families, a royal advisor, two extra seats for “special members,” and the general held two votes. As to why Jeno’s future council held two special seats or why the general had two votes was beyond you. The vocabulary was so different. For example, what Modia calls high houses were referred to as noble families in Northcy. The number of papers to review to remember all of the council was never-ending. Apparently, it was the queen’s duty to be informed of all noble members and their families. The queen’s duty was also to oversee the budgets spent on entertaining said families.

You and Jeno rarely saw each other, except for the evening meals together with the king and queen.

“Jeno, why don’t you introduce (Y/n) to your brothers tomorrow?” The queen asked her son during one dinner. When Jeno heard the question he nearly choked on his drink. The queen was kind and loving, but she always made it abundantly clear that Jeno was her one and only child.

“Very well, mother,” Jeno answered. This utterly confused you because Jeno was the only known heir to the throne. In the whole month preparing for life in Northcy, there wasn’t a single indication of Jeno having any brothers- not even in your years of schooling did you learn about the children of the Northcy king. All the books and classes said King Lee Donghae of the royal Lee family and Queen Lee Jaeyeon of the Noble Na family had one child, Crown Prince Lee Jeno of the royal Lee family. Such long titles did the royals have.

-

After dinner, Jeno took the opportunity to escort you back to your chambers. He couldn’t help how curious he was about you. Jeno constantly found himself watching you as you made your way through the palace, trying to catch a glimpse into the drawing rooms you studied in, or just watching the way your hands handled the cutlery at dinner.

“I wasn’t aware you had siblings?” You had asked Jeno during the walk to your chambers. The curiosity of it all forms the words for you.

“All half-siblings, I’m my mother’s only child but I’m the third son of my father,” Jeno answered. He didn’t even think of his only full sibling: his sister, Jia. Part of his unconsciousness pushed the memories as far down in his memory as possible.

“Third son? Your father had other women? Your brothers weren’t angry that the throne was given to you instead of them?” The questions seemingly come to mind one after another, not having enough strength to stop them. “I’m sorry,” you said, realizing you might be pushing onto an unsettling topic, “it’s not my place.”

“It’s alright,” Jeno said, smirking to himself. “The first three years on the throne my mother couldn’t produce an heir. The council insisted an heir be produced, by any means. My oldest brother, son of a nobleman’s daughter, an approved out of wedlock union, was crown prince for several years. He said he hated every moment of it. It’s a shame because he would have made a great leader, but he believes it’s not for him. Then my second brother, son of one of my father’s courtesans was never crown prince and he knew he would never be a Crown Prince but he never minded, he actually promised to stand by my side when I took the throne. And my younger, son of a lucky maid, we’re just a few months apart, however, has admitted he wouldn’t make a great ruler, but he promised to take over if something were to happen to me,” Jeno chuckled finishing his statement.

“Lucky maid?”

“My father is a just and fair man, he is a good father and a better king.” Jeno paused before continuing, wondering just how much to tell you, would it matter? “However, he is a terrible husband. If Modia had a beautiful queen doing its negotiation, who knows if Northcy would’ve put up a fight,” Jeno stated as fact. Like the world knew that the king would spend a night without his wife every now and then. Then again, father did always say ‘palace walls hear more than any other wall. “I say the maid was lucky because there was no evidence to suggest that my father saw her. However, when she laid her accusations at his feet, he accepted the child and paid the maid to say nothing,” Jeno finished off with a small shake of his head.

As the princess thought about this, she found that Jeno seemed to regret being born and taking the throne from his oldest brother. The princess would later learn, from Fei and Mei, through other gossiping maids, that Jeno never wanted the throne. He even tried to surrender it because he just wanted to live a carefree life without a nation depending on him. Oh, how you wished to do the same.

-

The next morning Jeno waited outside the princess’ chambers to walk with her to breakfast with his brothers. In front of her chambers stood her two guards. Jeno looked at the two men standing in front and he wondered how long they had known the princess. Jeno had two personal guards of his own; each of the princes had two personal guards, but they never followed Jeno around in the palace. The only time Jeno sees his guards is whenever he leaves the palace. He thought it was odd how your guards followed you almost everywhere, even within the palace.

A moment passed and you walked out ready for breakfast. You greeted the prince and he greeted you. As you walked, your two guards began to follow as they were trained to do. “You know you can dismiss them, I can handle escorting you to breakfast,” Jeno told you. You looked behind and noticed the two guards there.

“Chan, Hyunjin, you don’t have to follow us, I’ll be alright,” you told the dear boys.

It took everything in Chan not to be mad at how you so easily believed that Jeno could protect you. “With all due respect my princess, it is our duty to ensure your safety at all times, the best way to achieve that is to follow you all the time.” You smiled to yourself as Chan finished his statement. You knew he wasn’t gonna allow you to be alone with Jeno and his brothers.

“Very well” was all you said and continued to walk. The rest of the walk to the dining hall was silent. Jeno didn’t like the idea that the guards didn’t leave after you told them they could but he understood it was only their job, having to remind himself that the alliance was not technically complete yet.

When arriving at the dining hall, Jeno placed a hand on the small of your back, walking with you towards the table. Chan and Hyunjin remained at the door of the dining hall, far enough to watch, but could barely hear anything. When arriving at the table, Jeno introduced each of his brothers. The oldest is a tall, lean, and handsome young man. He had a sharp jawline with piercing eyes but a childlike smile. His name was Taeyong. The second brother had pitch-black hair, with round eyes and small lips. He was closer to Jeno’s age than the older brother. His name was Mark. The last brother was more tan than the first two and he had a much rounder face with puffy cheeks. His name was Donghyuck. However, they called him Haechan because of his bright personality that reflected the sun.

“Be happy that you have such a pretty bride, Jeno,” Taeyong told his younger brother. You sat beside Jeno, on one side of the table, across from you sat Haechan, and next to him sat Mark. At the front of the table sat Taeyong with the right side having Jeno and the left having Mark. Even though Jeno was the crown prince, he showed his older brothers the utmost respect. He never flaunted his title to any of them and he adhered to all their advice.

“(Y/n), my brother is a good man but he has an atrocious temper. I ask you to be patient with him. He means well but he doesn’t always know how to express it,” Taeyong addresses you. You’re able to tell despite his young age, Taeyong is a man that is wise beyond his years. Jeno doesn’t try to fight back his comment, he simply nods his head. Jeno was different here. You often ate with Jeno, almost every evening, but here Jeno seemed relaxed as if he was a simple 21-year-old and not a future king.

The rest of breakfast goes on with funny stories of Jeno’s youth and constant laughter. This would have to be the first time you saw Jeno ever laugh since your arrival. He had a beautiful smile that reached all the way up to his eyes. The way he acted around his brothers was an all too pleasing difference. He was calm, inviting even, it was like night and day with how different he was.

“We should go horseback riding, they say the first snow is gonna fall today!” Exclaimed Haechan. Northcy looked forward to the first snow. It was both a privilege and a tradition to ride horseback during the first snow. Both you and Jeno didn’t have any duties for the day, which was rare. The queen made sure that your usual duties were postponed. She had hoped that this day would allow you and Jeno to bond in a way. “Please, Taeyong. Come with us, you never hang out with us anymore since you took that position by father,” Haechan whined. You had learned that after Taeyong stepped down from crown prince when Jeno was born he went into the army and within the past year, he took the position of general in the army. He was actually one of the main reasons that Northcy continued to win battles against the Modia Kingdom. He was the general that was allowed two votes at the council, he is the general and a prince.

“Just for the morning, I have duties this afternoon,” Taeyong said, not wanting to disappoint his brothers. They all cheered, including Jeno. As the brothers got up to head towards the stables, you were about to bid them a farewell. Horseback riding wasn’t something you were permitted to do. Your father’s comment about it was: ‘there is no need for you to learn, focus on remembering council members instead.’

“You’re not leaving us, are you, (Y/n)?” Haechan asked, disappointment laced in his voice.

“I don’t know how to ride, I am sorry,” you stated matter of factly.

“Oh, who cares? You can ride with me, you won’t have to learn right now,” Haechan said as he grabbed your wrist and started to pull you towards the stables. The shock was evident on your face. Mark and your two guards were running after the two of you. Jeno was about to race after you until Taeyong grabbed his shoulder.

“He doesn’t mean anything by it, Jeno,” Taeyong said. Even if it was only a split second, Taeyong could see the rage and jealousy spill over his brother from how Haechan grabbed onto you. “You don’t want to scare the poor girl.”

“Tae, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jeno said, “I don’t have any feelings for her.” Which wasn’t entirely wrong, Jeno held no feelings for you, at least not the feelings you should have for the person you’re gonna marry. However, Jeno didn’t like that Haechan just dragged you away. He saw it as impolite and believed that the princess deserves to be treated with respect.

“Keep telling yourself that,” Taeyong said as he watched the gears turn in Jeno’s head.

-

You and Haechan were the first to arrive at the stables. Mark followed soon after and after Mark was Chan and Hyunjin. All three boys were panting, not realizing how far the dining hall was from the stables. After a while, Jeno and Taeyong arrived side by side.

“You tire yourselves out already?” Taeyong jokes to his two brothers. “Guards, I’m sorry you had to run all the way here, but you can leave the princess be already, she will be alright”

“I do no-“ Chan was about to speak until you interrupted.

“It’s fine Chan, you and Hyunjin go get some food or walk around the palace. I’ll be alright,” you said, giving Chan pleading eyes not to make a scene. You didn’t want to ruin such a happy moment for Jeno and his brothers. Chan understood, and he and Hyunjin left to ensure everything.

The stablemates prepared the horses for the princes. Taeyong had a serene white horse. It looked strong and sturdy as most horses do, but you could tell this horse belonged to Taeyong as when the horse saw Taeyong its face was immediately bright. Mark had a beautiful black horse, hair dark as midnight. Haechan had a brown horse, whose coat was shiny in the morning sun. Jeno’s horse was white as well but the horse seemed more like Jeno. Taeyong’s horse was white but it had a serene and elegant energy, while Jeno’s horse had a cold and chilling energy. Each of the boys began getting on top of their horses. Haechan was about to give you a hand to help you up onto his horse when Jeno came up from behind and stood between you and Haechan. “The princess will ride with me,” Jeno told his younger brother.

“Awh why? She doesn’t want to ride with you anyway,” Haechan said, not meaning to make his brother mad, but just to tease him. However, when Haechan saw the look his brother gave him he knew he made him upset.

Jeno offered you a hand and because you actually wanted to go horseback riding you accepted. Jeno places you in front of him with one leg on each side, back pressed into his chest. Then you guys were off. You expected it to be a slow ride, but that wasn’t the case at all. You quickly learned that Jeno and his brothers enjoyed racing. Jeno kept one hand on your waist, holding you against his chest to ensure you didn’t fall; you kept both hands on the saddle for the same reason. You never realized how tall a horse was until you were on top of one and looking down towards the ground.

The wind was blowing in your face, it felt freeing. The experience was new and exciting to you; this was something you would like to do again. Jeno wasn’t paying much attention to you, he was still just a young adult and the need to beat his brothers took his attention. In the middle of the race, snow began to fall, it was light, almost dream-like. Haechan was right, today was the first snow. You looked up in amazement, this was the first time you had ever seen snow in your entire life, the snow didn’t last though, melting before it even hit the ground. Soon the race was over, Taeyong trailed behind during most of the race until it was almost one and then he pulled ahead winning. After that came you and Jeno, then Haechan and lastly Mark. By the time you made it to the clearing, you were shivering from the cold already. Jeno noticed your shivering body, pulled you closer, and wrapped his arms around you to keep you warm. You leaned further back into Jeno’s touch, trying to embrace as much warmth that radiated off him. Jeno placed his chin on top of your head and smiled to himself. At that moment you guys did look like you were engaged.

Taeyong took notice of how his younger brother treated you and smiled to himself. Jeno was just a young boy who was expected to do great things. Taeyong was treated the same when he was born, but Taeyong was the lucky one. When Jeno was born, all the responsibility left Taeyong and was dropped onto Jeno. To most people Jeno would appear to be the luckiest Prince, however, Taeyong knew Jeno didn’t feel like it. Jeno was never allowed to have a normal childhood. During childhood, Mark and Haechan ran around the palace freely while Jeno took etiquette classes for council meetings. In middle school, Haechan and Mark began taking up sports, while Jeno had to take up hand-to-hand combat training. In high school, Mark and Haechan were allowed to actually go to a school, but Jeno had private tutors and began attending council meetings. Jeno took on all these responsibilities, never throwing a tantrum, never taking it out on his brothers. In the eyes of the people of Northcy, Jeno was a picture-perfect prince. Jeno is the picture-perfect prince.

-

You and the rest of the boys rode back towards the stables. You held onto the arm that was draped across your chest like a seatbelt. You felt as if you were in a dream. As you arrived towards the stable you saw Chan and Hyunjin. The look Chan held was chilling, causing you to shiver again. You let go of Jeno’s arm and wrapped your arms around yourself, practically forcing Jeno’s arm off of you. You dropped your head in an attempt to avoid Chan’s intimidating glare. You felt nothing for Jeno, except responsibility. Jeno was simply a way to save your people, he was your responsibility, your duty, and nothing more.

“Princess, are you alright?” Jeno questioned when you forced his arm away, he could still feel you shivering.

“I’m fine, just tired,” you said breathlessly wanting to go back to your chambers. You bid a farewell to each of the princes and excused yourself. Jeno stood there, utterly confused, thinking that the ride went well. Jeno saw you walk off with your guards and it looked as if one of the guards were speaking to you.

-

“Are you in love with him?!” Chan yelled in your face in the privacy of your bedroom.

“Why would I be in love with that prince?!” You screamed back.

“You seemed all in love today holding onto him like?!” Chan kept yelling. A single tear slid down your face. Chan’s face was immediately filled with regret. He shouldn’t be questioning you like this; he knew you didn’t want to marry Jeno. Chan pulled you close and you sobbed into his chest. He held you close for what seemed like hours. You loved Chan with all of your heart, you wanted to run away and live a happy and simple life with Chan. However, each night that you thought of that dream, the cries of your people pulled you back to reality. You had a duty to fulfill, no matter the feelings your heart held.

“Are you alright, my princess?” Chan asked as you pulled away.

“Please never yell at me again, I don’t know if I could handle you being upset with me like that again,” you said breathing heavily. Your heart hurts knowing you can’t be with the man you loved.

“Of course, my princess,” Chan said, wiping the tears from your cheeks. Chan felt terrible. He allowed his emotions to get the best of him. He needed to remember his place, and it was not right for him to be like this with you. “(Y/n), I’m sorry, I had no right to yell or question you like that,” your face in his hand.

“I don’t,” you paused trying to calm down, “I don’t love him, I love you.”

“I know,” Chan said with loving eyes, “but you can not continue to love me, my princess.” A sad smile painted itself on his face. Tears came welling to your eyes, you closed your eyes allowing the tears to fall and nodding. What Chan said was the sad truth.

-

After making sure you were feeling better, Chan left your side to go stand guard outside your doors. As Chan exited your room, Prince Jeno approached. The two made eye contact and Chan quickly looked down, not wanting to see the man that would take the love of his life.

“Has the princess gone off?” Jeno asked the other guard, Hyunjin.

“She still there?” Hyunjin asked Chan.

“Yeah, she’s about to have a cup of tea,” Chan said as he returned to his position. Prince Jeno made his way into your room, not stopping to knock.

“You seriously need to be careful,” Hyunjin whispered to Chan.

“Careful? Of what?” Chan attempted to act oblivious.

“Chan, she is the future queen of our nation. She is going to marry Prince Jeno whether you like it or not. It’s her duty, and you know how (Y/n) is, she isn’t gonna run away from what needs to be done. I know you love her and I know she loves you but you gotta let her go,” Hyunjin said with sad eyes. He knew how much his friend cared for you, it was truly a pity you two couldn’t be together.

-

Jeno wanted to chase after you after the horseback ride, but that wasn’t possible.

“Crown Prince Lee Jeno, General Lee Taeyong, Prince Lee Mark, and Prince Lee Donghyuck, your presence is requested by the king,” a palace servant called for the boys.

“Father wanted to see all of us, this must not be good,” Mark said as panic started to flood his face.

“Oh, please! We haven’t done anything wrong,” Haechan said.

“Really? You’ve caused no trouble in the past day or two?” Jeno asked his brother. Haechan always enjoyed a good prank.

“I promise, my future king, I have caused no such trouble within the palace walls,” Haechan said with an exaggerated bow to Jeno. Jeno hates being addressed like that, especially by his brothers. Haechan loved to do it because he knew it made Jeno mad. Naturally, Jeno started chasing him around to give him ‘what he deserved.’

“Hey, quit fighting already, do you want to keep the actual king waiting?” Taeyong asked his two brothers who were currently on the ground wrestling.

“No,” both boys said with their heads hung low. They all made their way to see the king.

Upon arrival, the four boys were greeted by their father and Jeno’s mother. “Your majesties,” Taeyong greeted and bowed along with the three other boys who remained silent. They were in the king’s private drawing-room. It was plain, simple, much more like a lounging area for the king to entertain during private meetings. There was a secret door behind the shelves of books that led to the king’s office. No one was allowed in the king’s office. Not once did Jeno, or his brothers, or his mother ever step foot inside the office. Only the king, and one servant, Jung, the king’s personal butler, were permitted.

“You’ve requested our presence, father?” Taeyong asked, standing straight and looking directly at his father.

“Yes, I want to make an announcement to all of you: after Princess (Y/n) and Jeno’s union, I am thinking of stepping down as king,” The king said with a bright smile upon his face.

“What, father?!” Jeno shouted in pure shock.

“Yes, I will step down from the throne after you are married and you will be crowned king, but before all that, my two sons, Mark and Donghyuck, I want to make you each member of the council,” the king said with a satisfied expression.

“Father stepping down? No king in the history of our entire kingdom has ever stepped down before, is that even possible?” Jeno asked incredulously.

“If it’s not possible, I will make it possible. You, my son, have served on the council for almost five years now, since you were 16. You are ready for the throne and your brothers will help guide the way for you. Taeyong is already a member of the council. Mark and Donghyuck are sure to catch on soon enough. Northcy is entering a time of peace; there’s no need to worry about ascending the throne too early,” the king said with a satisfied grin. Haechan and Mark were given off to two council members; they were expected to start learning their duties immediately. Only Jeno and Taeyong were left.

“Father, you can’t be serious,” Jeno groaned in frustration. “Even if you consider Northcy to be entering a time of peace, there is no telling how our people will react to this union,” Jeno stated, his voice clear and concise. Although his point was to defer his father from stepping down, all it did was further prove that the king could step down. Jeno was thinking about what was best for his people, and he held the confidence of a king.

“Jeno, my boy, I am stepping down, not dying. I will help you at every step of the way. The transition between me stepping down and you being crowned king will be lengthy.” The king looked at his son. “There is no need for you to worry so much.”

“Father, no, you cannot just step down because I am forced into a marriage. That clearly is not wanted nor needed,” Jeno stuck firm to his stances on the issues, the venom being weaved into his voice.

“My boy,” the king stood from his seat, placing both hands on Jeno’s shoulders, “you need not worry so much, all will be well. It’s best you boys head off. I’m sure you have much work that needs to be done, Taeyong?” The king asked to change the subject.

“Yes, father, the plans to bring home soldiers and redistribute soldiers in all parts of Northcy is an effect. I’ll see to it personally that everything goes well,” Taeyong states, pulling Jeno along to leave the king and queen in the drawing-room.

“Taeyong, I don’t want this, I don’t want to be king, I don’t wanna get married, why is father making me do this? Can’t you become king and ascend the throne?” Jeno asked his older brother as he exited the room. Anyone could see in Jeno’s face how much the idea of being king worried him.

“Jeno, you will make a fine king, don’t worry so much. Also, the princess is a beautiful girl. What’s the problem with marrying her?”

“The problem isn’t her, the problem is marriage, I don’t want it, not right now at least,” Jeno sighed, “and I want to get married to someone I know, someone I love, not some girl that father and mother presented to me.” Taeyong knew what he meant. If he could lift the burdens from his brother’s shoulders, he would, but this was Jeno’s duty as the only male heir of the true king and queen. Sadly, after Jeno’s statement, Taeyong was called away by a maid, leaving Jeno to his thoughts.

As Jeno walked away from the drawing-room, he found himself wandering towards your chambers. As he got near, he saw one of your guards exit your room. A princess in her private chambers, alone with a boy. Clearly, that would call for a scandal, not to mention the princess’ engagement.

“Has the princess gone off?” Jeno asked the other guard, Hyunjin, as he approached your doors.

“She still there?” Hyunjin asked The guard coming out of your room, Chan.

“Yeah, she’s about to have a cup of tea,” Chan said as he returned to his position. Prince Jeno made his way into your room. Inside, he saw you seated pouring some tea.

“Chan, I promise I am fine, go before people talk,” you said not paying attention to who had entered.

“Princess? It is I, Jeno.”

“Prince Jeno!” You said startled, immediately getting up to greet the prince.

“You don’t need to bow, princess, it is only you and I here,” Jeno said with a soft smile as he made his way near your table. “May I?” Jeno gestures asking if he could take a seat. Your chambers held little personality. The walls were painted pastel green, and the trim was off-white. There was no balcony in this room, but large windows that allowed an abundance of sunlight. There were two white couches with a glass coffee table in between and a small table that held the tea set was in front of a large window, overlooking a courtyard.

“Of course, of course, would you like a cup of tea? I was just about to pour myself some,” you asked frantically, still unsure why Jeno was in your room.

“Yes, please,” Jeno answered. You two sat in awkward silence, sipping your tea and waiting for the other to speak.

“Sooooooo…” you started but trailed off, you reminded yourself to just breathe for Jeno was merely a young adult, who happened to be the future king of your nation and was to be your husband. “Why did you come here?” You asked as you found your words.

“Right,” Jeno set down his cup of tea, turning to face you, “I wanted to make sure you were alright, you didn’t seem well after the horseback ride,” Jeno stayed, there was a look of worry within his eyes. His gaze made you feel cared for, something you thought the prince was incapable of doing at one point in your life.

“I am just fine,” you felt a blush creep up to your cheeks, looking away to hide from the prince. “No reason for you to worry.”

“Are you sure? You rushed off so quickly I was barely able to even say bye as you left,” Jeno pressed on further. Deep in his gut, Jeno believed you rushing off had something to do with the guard, but he pushed the feeling further down as there was no reason to think that just yet.

“I’m alright, Jeno.” That was the first time in your entire stay here you addressed Jeno by merely his name, not with his title. He actually liked hearing you say his name, he liked the way you spoke. Your tone was always gentle, kind, like silk to his ears. Jeno pushed further on, asking you questions about yourself and your family. In an attempt to avoid conversations about you personally, you spoke of your family. When that didn’t work, you asked questions instead of answering them.

You learned Jeno was a skilled archer and he preferred music studies over all others. Jeno has never seen a single battle or a moment of war for Taeyong took those burdens; he was the prince in the war. Jeno doesn’t know what it’s like to have a kingdom fall into poverty because his kingdom always had money and a large army. You also learned that Jeno wanted to join the army with his brother, but was denied by his father, saying Jeno isn’t allowed to die. Jeno wanted to learn music and how to paint but was forced into archery and history. Jeno’s life was a never-changing path that was decided, it was a set road, ready for him to walk.

Jeno has learned that you were not meant to be queen at all. You were the youngest child of the king and queen, with an older brother and two older sisters. However, when the war took lives faster than new ones were born, your siblings weren’t afraid to step up to the fight. Being royal children, you and your siblings were raised as equals, learning everything from cooking and cleaning to martial arts and war techniques. Your siblings being much older than you, when they left home to fight, you were still doing your schooling. After each letter made it back home instead of the authors, your parents knew they could no longer keep fighting this war. They had already lost millions of people and now three of their children.

After the third letter made it home, your father put in order 15: ceasefire but hold the line. The soldier at the war front was not to evacuate or move from their position but they were to stop firing at the enemy. The negotiations for peace began, not that Modia had much to negotiate anyway because, without a male heir, the kingdom would fall out of the family. The royal family line died with your brother, so the island that started it all would be left alone out of respect for Modia, all of Modia’s territories would be in control of the new king and queen, and Makena Palace in Modia would now become a summer palace. This was temporary, though, because Modia would only be in Jeno’s control after your father passed on.

-

As the two of you talked on and on, neither one of you noticed or addressed Fei and Mei. The two maids entered your chambers, helping in any way you saw fit. However, seeing you in deep conversation with the prince, Fei and Mei decided to go about their routine: pulling out the evening dress for dinner, fixing the bed, cleaning the bathroom. The two maids nearly complete all tasks in utter silence. It was until Fei and Mei entered the bathroom did either one of them decide to speak. Your bathroom was connected to the sleeping area of your bedroom, which was separated by a wall and double doors from where you and Jeno were.

“Getting cozy fast, the princess has,” Fei stated to her sister.

“Fei, watch what you say,” Mei stated in a rather hushing manner.

“Mei, no one else can hear us,” Fei started, “all I am saying is the princess seems to be getting along well with the prince, nothing more.”

“I hope Chan is alright,” Mei stated and Fei just nodded along knowingly. Anyone, everyone, in your kingdom knew the story. Knew of the princess and her personal guard. There was no denying the loving looks passed among the two of you.

-

The knock at your door pulled you and Jeno out of your guys’ thoughts, looking towards the two eggshell white French doors anticipating who would ruin such a divine moment. One door was slowly pushed open revealing the queen. Both you and Jeno immediately stood, bowing to greet the queen.

“My apologies, I didn’t realize you had a guest princess, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” the queen said, hand over heart.

“No apology needed, Your Majesty,” you said, slowly rising for your bowing stances, “your presence is no interruption.” ‘The presence of any queen or king is never an interruption to anyone. You must remember that even as royalty, it is an honor to be in the presence of a king or queen,’ Lady Kam’s lessons on proper etiquette play in your mind.

“My dear daughter,” the queen has taken a keen interest in calling you ‘daughter.’ The name makes you tense. “You must meet with the gardener, the flower arrangements aren’t set yet.”

“Of course, Your Majesty,” you said. You would take memorizing noble families over wedding arrangements any day, but you can no longer avoid the duties. “I apologize, Prince Jeno, for I must leave you.”

“No apology needed,” Jeno said, looking at you, longing for a few minutes ago, when your conversation wasn’t interrupted. There were still so many thoughts in his head, so many things he wanted to discuss with you and get your opinion on. And memories… slowly resurfacing, much to his own horror, that he needed help coming to terms with. He specifically wanted your help, as he knew you could truly understand him.

-

You and the queen walked together to meet the gardener in the main foyer. You stayed a step behind her. Everything from the seating arrangement to the way you walked must be done in a hierarchical order. The queen had a higher status than you, so she led the group, you were second, then your maids, and lastly, your guards. It wasn’t common for your guards to follow instead of lead, but since this was the queen, they had to follow.

Even what you wore was a sign of status. The queen wore navy straight-leg pants, topped with a white bishop sleeve blouse that went up to her neck. A simple medallion necklace lay on her chest, her hair pulled back into a tight low bun and a simple silver tiara topped her head. The outfit was simple but classy, only something a queen would wear. It was certainly more elegant than what you wore: black tight dress pants with a deep crimson red wrap long-sleeved blouse.

As you entered the main foyer, there the gardener, an older gentleman, old enough to be your father, stood. He was a slim man, skin obviously tanned from the sun, his hair salt and pepper from age. Next to him stood a young boy, at first just looking like an assistant for the gardener. But as you drew closer to them, you could see the resemblance between the two: the same nose, the same cheekbones, the same jawline. They were father and son.

“Your Majesty,” the older gentleman stated as he and his son bowed, “I am Andrew and this is my son, Ramsey.”

“Pleased to meet the two of you,” the queen started before turning to you, “let us make our way to the palace garden, there you can see the flowers we have and what will work best for the wedding.”

All of you made your way through the palace to the private garden. It was the only area where the temperature remained regulated, warm. The queen and the gardener talked amongst themselves about the flower arrangements, never once asking your opinion. This is how most wedding arrangements went: the queen handled it all, every now and then looking to you for a nod of approval, which you always gave. There was no reason to argue, you thought; the queen will have the wedding she wants. If you truly got what you wanted, you wouldn’t even be in this palace.

The son didn’t speak at all either, he just held a tablet with a pen. He wrote everything that needed to be remembered, never allowing his father and the queen to venture out of earshot, always close enough behind to hear everything but not too close to get in the way. Oh, how you envied him, to be responsible for so little. A simple life as a gardener’s daughter festered in your daydreams as you looked on to the flowers. You walked away from the group, to the neglected parts of the garden. It was all taken care of, just neglected because no one seemed to enjoy these flowers as much as the others.

“Princess (Y/n),” the queen called, pulling you from your thoughts.

“Huh?” was all that came to mind to say

“I’ve been trying to get your attention, dear,” the queen looked to you with a show of concern, but under the concern was a hint of irritation that you weren’t focused on the task at hand. “How do red and white roses sound for your bouquet and then we’ll have blue carnations for all the arrangements?”

‘I held orchids for my bouquet; they were always my favorite flowers’ your mother told you one day long, long ago. “Instead of white roses for the bouquet, what about white orchids?” You asked, more to the queen than the gardener.

“That’s possible,” the gardener said as his son wrote.

The queen was in shock at you actually making a decision, smiling to herself, hoping this was a sign you’re coming around to the idea of this marriage. “Of course, my dear, whatever you want.”

The words meant to encourage and uplift you about the wedding did the exact opposite. Hearing ‘whatever you want’ from the queen caused you to physically flinch. What you truly want is to cancel this wedding and go home.

Soon enough, the meeting with the gardener and his son was over. You see the two of them off leaving the palace. All the flower arrangements set into motion.

“Tomorrow, you have an important luncheon with the noble Na family,” the queen stated, walking away from the foyer. You followed closely behind. “The noble families will soon start arriving at the palace for the wedding.”

“Already? We’re still two months out.”

“The Na family will be arriving late this evening, and the two of us will see to it that they are settled in,” the queen ignored your comment as if you never even said it, “and in a couple of weeks, the noble Min family will come and then a week after them will be the noble Kim family. By that time, we will only be a month from the weddings, and more families will continue to arrive. Take the next few hours and prepare yourself; it’s time to put all those lessons on the Northcy kingdom to the test.”

————–

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[10:49] Your thighs were sore, your eyes were rolling back, you were considerably fucked out of your mind, but your boyfriend was still absolutely conherent to everything around him. Jeno had looked completely unaffected as you bounced up and down his cock continuously. He even still managed to look behind you to the computer screen, when he noticed a notification pop up on the screen. You were nearly on the edge of the mind-blowing orgasm and your boyfriend was completely unbothered.

You wish you could say that you were irritated at his unethustatic reaction, but you really weren’t. You were extremely turned on by the fact that he remained completely in control. That he wore this cocky smirk as he watched you bounce up and down. That his hands rested on your hips, not at all controlling your movements but just resting there. That he looked at you with loving eyes, his pupils blown wide.

*ring*

Jeno’s phone started going off, stopping your movements. You calmed down a bit, sobering up just a bit. Jeno grabbed his phone off the desk looking at the screen to see Jaemin’s contact picture. He slid the button to answer the call, “hey.”

You could hear the muffled sound of Jaemin speaking, but you remained still waiting for Jeno to finish his conversation. “Hold on one sec, jaems,” Jeno spoke quickly, moving the phone away from his ear, “why’d you stop baby?”

You wanted to curl into yourself at this moment, completely shocked at Jeno’s question, “because you’re on the phone.”

“Did I say to stop?” Jeno asked, with an air of confidence. His voice dripped with dominance. You slowly shook your head, unsure where Jeno’s mindset was at. “Keep going baby.”

You slowly started back up again, going up and down at an insufferably slow pace. Jeno wasn’t satisfied, squishing his phone between his shoulder and ear. He placed both hands on your hips, this time controlling your movements. Bouncing you up and down faster than you were going initially. You had to grip Jeno’s arms to steady yourself. You threw your head back in ecstasy, the moans pouring from you. You felt the orgasm that was slowly built up over time, rushing back to you with light speed.

Jeno hummed along to whatever Jaemin was saying, as he moved one hand from your hip to your core. Rubbing soft circles on your cilt, speeding up your impending orgasm. You let a gut deep moan.

“Is that (y/n)?” you heard Jaemin’s voice clear as day in that one moment. You tried to halt your movements, but Jeno didn’t let you.

Instead he chuckled at Jaemin’s question, “I’ll call you back late Jaems,” he said with that same cocky smirk.

“Dude what the fuck, why…” Jeno ended the call before Jaemin could finish his question.

“Look at you baby,” Jeno teased, he started thrusting up, meeting your bounces, “couldn’t even control yourself when Jaemin was on the phone.”

“Jen… so” you were panting out of breath at this point, ready to pass out, “so close.”

“Go on baby, you can cum for me.” At his command you felt the wave of pleasure wash over you in absolute bliss. You threw your head back as you clenched around Jeno tighter than before. You rested your head on his shoulder, now feeling exhausted. “Feel good baby?”

All you did was nod and mumble something that sounded like a ‘yeah.’

“Don’t fall asleep, I’m not done with you yet,” Jeno teased further. You wanted to groan, and complain you were tired, but this was Jeno. You would never turn down the opportunity to get your guts absolutely rearranged by this man.

My Duty As Princess

Chapter 6

Lee Jeno x fem reader

masterlist

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview, 01, 02, 03, 04,05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:explicit language

Word Count: 4.9K

Authors Note: this week has not been it for me honestly, but nonetheless Jeno. hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

—————-

When you finally woke up, it was dark outside. Jeno’s arms were wrapped around you.   You had half a mind to close your eyes and fall back asleep, but there was a phone on the nightstand. You reached out for it to check the time of 9:23 pm, glanced out the window, and thought ‘the day is over anyway.’ Closing your eyes again, going back to sleep already, you felt safest here, in his arms.  

When you opened your eyes again, there was daylight shining into the bedroom. You still felt Jeno’s arms around you. Reaching out for the phone to check the time, it was 7:31 am. You decided it was time to finally get up. Sliding out from under Jeno’s arms, you left the bed, grabbed one of Jeno’s jackets, slipped it on, and quietly exited the room. You were making your way to your own chambers.

When you got there, you pushed open the doors. The room looked exactly like when you arrived. Going to the bedroom, pushing those doors open, you looked around the bedroom area. The bed was made, your phone sat on the nightstand, plugged in. It looked as if nothing happened. You grabbed your phone, checking the notifications: a few missed texts, but it was mostly social media. Shoving the phone into a jacket pocket, you went into your closet. You looked for a more appropriate outfit, instead of Jeno’s sweats. You were so deep in thought of what to wear, what outfit will make it seem like nothing happened, you didn’t notice the other person. 

“What are you doing here?” a voice asked, you whipped around to see Jeno standing in the bedroom, looking at you. His voice, lower than normal, almost sounded rough. His hair was flat, almost covering his eyes completely. He wore a hoodie with some sweatpants, his hands shoved into the hoodie pockets.  He looked so comfortable, so relaxed, so informal, but for some reason, you felt so intimidated. He had this way about him that made you feel small.  

“I just wanted some clothes,” you tried to sound calm, and unbothered, but you felt the wavering of your voice. 

“Fei or Mei could’ve got your clothes from here,” Jeno made his way towards you, pulling at your waist, “you didn’t need to come here yourself.”  Jeno pulled you close, he was pressed against you, standing in your closet. 

You felt your heart start to race. “I know,” you let out a breath, not daring to meet Jeno’s eyes.  His fingers pulled at your chin, raising your face to look at him. “I didn’t want to trouble them some more,” you felt the urge to say more. 

Jeno nodded, let go of you, and took a step back. You let out a breath as you watched him go. “Grab what you need, and we’ll take it back to my room,” Jeno said as he walked out, leaving you in the closet. You took a moment to catch your breath before grabbing the leather duffle bag, and about four days’ worth of clothes; you also neatly folded a dress, just in case.  After packing the clothes, you grabbed some of your makeup, and some shower stuff too, shoving it all in the bag. 

When you finished, you made your way into the seating area, to see Jeno sitting on the couch, playing on his phone. You cleared your throat to grab his attention. Jeno turned his head to look at you, standing, shoving his phone in his pocket. He made his way around the couch, towards you. He reached out for your bag and you handed it over. You never would’ve thought that you enjoyed watching the way he moved, or how he took control, or how he was gentle with every gesture. There were many things about the prince that you love. Jeno took your bag into one hand and interlaced your fingers in the other. The two of you walked hand-in-hand back to his room. It was never discussed, but it was like the two of you just fell into this routine of being a couple. When you guys got back to his room, a pinging noise from Jeno’s phone started to go off. He set your bag down on the bed. You looked at him expectantly. He pulled out his phone, examining the text. You watched as his face changed, reading the texts over. He looked up at you, the look in his eyes held so many unidentifiable emotions.

“I’ve got to go,” Jeno looked at you, now looking worried, “are you gonna be okay?” 

You nodded your head, not trusting your voice to reassure him. Why does he care so much?

“I’ll send someone up here so you’re not alone,” he was rushing and you nodded, not wanting to keep him. You realize that he’s worried about you because you quite literally almost died. He came up to you, kissing your forehead, just like it was a routine thing to do. You felt your heart pounding against your chest. He opened his mouth to say more, but then he closed his mouth, opting not to. You watched as he made his way to the door, all but running out. He stopped at the chamber doors and looked back to you, “I’ll be back soon,” he said, before exiting, now jogging down the hall. 

You looked around the room. It felt so cold now. Abandoning the bag, you walked into the seating area, looking around there. You remembered the first time being in Jeno’s chambers alone. It felt like a lifetime ago. You walked to Jeno’s desk, papers still scattered around. The last time you were here, there wasn’t a laptop, but now it was laid out on the desk. There was something missing too: the picture. The picture of him and Jisoo wasn’t there. Instead, it was a picture of Hades, sleeping on the couch. There was a person behind him. You examined the new picture closely, realizing the person laying on the couch behind Hades was you. It was from the day Jeno gave you Hades. You lay on the couch, Hades curled up by your stomach, sleeping peacefully. You must’ve dozed off for a minute, not remembering Jeno ever snapping a picture. Your face wasn’t in the picture, but you could tell it was you because you remembered that top you wore. You smiled to yourself, feeling pride that your picture, even though no one would be able to tell, sat on Jeno’s desk. You wondered when he even had the time to print it out, or frame it, or why he did it, but you were happy he did nonetheless.

-

As I walked the princess back to my own chambers, my phone started to go off. I put her bag down on my bed, looking at it. 

Jaemin: The guy is talking 

Jaemin: He wants to speak to you

Jaemin: He says he’ll talk to you or the princess

Taeyong: Come down to holding 

I was confused as to why this guy wanted to talk to me. “I got to go,” I said to the princess. I really didn’t want to leave her, but had to. “Are you gonna be okay?”  

She nodded. I want to stay and I feel like I should. “I’ll send someone up here, so you’re not alone.” She nodded again. I came up to her, kissed her forehead. The three-word phrase of ‘I love you’ wanted to escape my lips, but I couldn’t get myself to actually say it. I turned back around before exiting. I have to say something to stop myself from looking weird, “I’ll be back soon.” 

As I nearly ran down the hall, I think about how I should’ve said it. I can go back and say it. No, I didn’t say it, I can’t just go back to say just that. What if I’m love-bombing her? How do I know I love her? She nearly died, and now I can’t stand the thought of being in a world where she doesn’t exist. Is that love? Is loving someone feeling like you want to shield them from the world? Is loving someone feeling like they are who you should spend all your time with? I loved Jisoo, but I always knew I could live without her. Now I don’t know if I could live without the princess. I should’ve said it. Why didn’t I say it?  She knows I feel that way, I told her I felt that way, right? I should’ve just said it. 

I almost forgot where I was going, finally making it down to the underground level, the holding: a place that hasn’t actually been used in decades was constructed when the palace was built as a place to hold prisoners. It was for when attacks on royals were a weekly thing, but I don’t think there has been an attack since before the war. I looked to one of the guards that were down here. “Can you send the princess’ maids to my chambers please?”

The guard nodded and left awkwardly, probably thinking that finding maids wasn’t in his job description.

I entered the room. It had been renovated, everything in the room looked like a modern police integration room. Mark, Jaemin, and Johnny were standing, watching the interrogation through a window. Taeyong had just entered the room through another door, wiping blood from his hands.  

I made my way to the window, looking at the guy on the other side. He was handcuffed to a chair, his face so badly beaten. It didn’t look like the same guy that I pulled the mask from.  What happened?

“He was being rude,” Taeyong said, watching me observe the guy. It was like he heard the voice in my head asking questions, “he should learn to be respectful.” Taeyong, my older brother, was so soft, so caring, that I would often forget he was a general. I forgot how scary he could be at times.  “He wants to talk to you, and better you than the princess. How is she by the way? I heard she can’t be alone.” 

“She’s better than earlier,” I didn’t know what to say. How would any of us feel having almost been killed?

“It’s gonna take time,” Taeyong nodded, seemingly satisfied with my response. 

“Do we know why he wants to talk to me?” I asked, turning my attention back to the guy inside, everyone shook their heads.  

“All we know is he entered the palace through the kitchen entrance, and that he isn’t here on his own accord,” Taeyong said, coming to stand next to me.  

“Someone planned this?”  Why would someone plan an attack on the princess? 

“It seems like it,” Taeyong started off, putting together the pieces of the puzzle just as I am, “I don’t think whoever planned this intended to kill the princess, just scare her.” Taeyong now looked at me. He had an idea of who did it, and so did I. 

I walked into the room. The guy chuckled when he saw me. “About time, Your Highness,” the guy spit some blood onto the floor.  

I pulled a chair that was stranded against a wall, into the middle of the room, across from the guy. “What’s your name?” I wanted to be angry with him, but the more I looked at him, the more I felt pity. 

“That doesn’t matter,” the guy chuckled more, “you know, I’ve lived my entire life on the edge.”

“I really don’t have time for this,” I said, getting up from the chair.  

“The princess looks stunning when she lays in the moonlight,” the guy paused. I felt the anger roll off onto me. “She looked so helpless lying there.” 

I tilted my head back, slowly breathing in through the nose, out through the mouth.

“I wonder if she’s gonna have nightmares about me.” The guy smirked and all the pity I once felt disappeared.  

“What do you want?” 

“My life was a dance between me and death.” 

I sat back down. Apparently, if I’m gonna get anything from him, I needed to listen to his ramble. 

“I never thought I would be honored to die by the general prince’s hands.” He isn’t the first to think that, “You know, Your Highness, your family has come to me for many things.” 

This statement actually caught me off guard, my family?

“I have lived my life as the criminal for the royal family. The pay for this job is really good though.” 

Hansol, that’s the name he went by, I don’t know his full name. 

“Your father asked me to find your mother a kidney one time. That was a very messy task; I don’t care for the amount of blood that comes with organ harvesting.” 

Mother was sick for six months, with kidney failure. “The former queen, that lady, she’s scary, had me run my car through a business. No one was hurt though, luckily.” He smirked while saying the last word, almost like he could have hurt someone if he wanted to.

“I don’t need to hear this,” I got up again. I should be with the princess, not down here, listening to nonsense. 

“But this task,” I started to make my way to the door, “scaring the princess,” I stopped, hand on the door, “that was the first time he came to ask for my help. Pretty young too.” 

Maybe I misheard.

“Aren’t the two of you close, as well?” 

Who is he talking about? 

“Jisung said he was just helping his sister.”

I felt my heart sink, the young boy, Jisung was like, no, he was a little brother to me.

“Don’t be too mad at him, said he was doing this for her; she didn’t want her to get her hands dirty.” 

Of course, it was her! Anyone with half a brain could tell that she wanted the princess gone. “The boy did say not to hurt the princess, just scare her, make her want to leave Northcy.” 

“Then why did you?” I was still facing the door not trusting myself. 

“She looked so helpless, I couldn’t stop myself, almost thought about taking more of her,” he laughed out loud. 

I left the room, not wanting to hear anymore. If I would’ve heard one more word, his head would be separate from the rest of his crooked body. After closing the door, I had to stop to breathe. Jaemin placed his hand on my shoulder. I doubled over, feeling the urge to throw up. I don’t even know what I would throw up; I haven’t eaten anything yet.  

“His background checks out, he’s telling the truth about who he is,” Taeyong said, holding his phone, looking at me. I stood up straight, gaining my composure, “bring in the Park siblings, have them separated,” Taeyong told one of the guards standing by the door.  

“I need to go.” I should’ve stayed with the princess. 

“Jeno,” anyone could hear the worry in Jaemin’s voice.  He always did know me best.

“I’m gonna go.” Even though I felt like shit, I needed to do what was best for the princess, and that wasn’t lingering in the basement. She needed me.   

-

You had changed out of Jeno’s sweats, into a turtle neck with sailor pants. Whatever part of your neck still showing was covered with concealer and powder. You were standing in Jeno’s bathroom, staring at your reflection in the vanity mirror. You changed, did your hair and your makeup. You finally thought that you looked normal as if you weren’t the victim of a vicious attack. You looked around the counter and the rest of the bathroom, realizing you made a mess.  Every outfit you put on and tore off was thrown around the bathroom, the countless makeup wipes you used from removing and reapplying, the plethora of bobby pins and hair ties thrown all over. 

“Damn it, damn it,” you mumbled to yourself, pulling the bag from the floor, shoving clothes inside, “Jeno’s gonna be furious.” 

“Why am I gonna be furious?” As if your life was a movie, Jeno walked into the bathroom, hands shoved into his hoodie, looking around the room. 

“I’m sorry, I promise I’ll clean up, it’ll be like I was never here,” the words tumbled out faster than your hands worked to clean. 

Jeno chuckled at your distraught figure, kneeling on the floor. With how you acted these past 36 hours, no one would have ever thought you to be a princess. “Princess,” he called softly, pulling you off the floor, “don’t worry about it.” He smiled at you warmly, but you couldn’t look at him, just staring back at the mess you made. “Where’s Fei and Mei?” He gently pulled your jaw,  forcing you to look at him.  

“I sent them to get some tea, and my schedule for the day.”

“Schedule?” 

“Yes, I can’t play victim forever.” You had responsibilities to maintain. “The wedding is just a little over two weeks away and I already wasted a day away.” 

Jeno gave you a look, the disagreement written all over his face. He opened and closed his mouth several times. The knock on the chamber doors provided the perfect interruption for him. You pulled away, walking into the seating area to see Mei standing with a tray of tea and Fei with a paper in her hand.  “Yes?” 

“Your tea, Your Highness,” Mei stated with a bow, moving to set the tea on the coffee table. 

“I have requested your schedule with Queen Jaeyeon. She said that for today and tomorrow, your schedule will be filled with rest and eating,” Fei said with a smirk. She had told you before she left that you shouldn’t be worried about duties right now.  

“That’s good,” Jeno said, coming up behind you, “if you ladies don’t mind, I would like to be with the princess alone.” 

“Of course, Your Highness,” Mei bowed, pulling Fei along with her out of the room. 

Jeno pulled you into his embrace, his head tilted as he looked at you and smiled.  

“What?” You felt embarrassed by all his staring. 

“Let’s go out,” his body felt so warm against yours, “we’ll do anything you want today,”  the idea of spending your day with him felt too good to be true, “let’s just get out of the palace.”

You couldn’t help but nod at the suggestion. “Good, I’ll go change.” 

You watched Jeno walk back into his room, thinking back to the mess on the bathroom floor. Making your way there, you began picking up the clothes tossed aside, shoving them back into your bag. 

Jeno caught you in the middle of cleaning, “leave it, princess. I really don’t mind the mess.”

You looked at the prince that now stood over you. He wore an all-black outfit: jeans, a plain tee, and a leather jacket. He was so simply handsome, you thought. 

He pulled you up, interlacing your fingers and kissing the back of your hand. You and Jeno made your way to the garage and hopped into his car. You had no idea where you would be going, but you enjoyed the ride. 

You arrived at a cathedral, standing outside, looking up at the massive building in awe.  The architecture of the building was beautifully done. You looked back to Jeno, who stared at you instead of the building.  “Why are we here?” 

-

Northcy’s cathedral, I found myself driving there as we left the palace. I felt my phone buzzing the entire way. I knew it was Jaemin, but whether it was an update or a check-up I didn’t know. I pulled up right outside the main entrance of the building. The princess stepped out, taking in the beautiful site. It never failed to put people in awe.

“Why are we here?” she turned back to look at me. 

In all honesty, I don’t know why I felt the need to drive here. “Beautiful isn’t it?” I nodded towards the building, making my way towards the princess.

“It is,” she looked at me expectantly. 

I had to answer her question.  I grabbed her hand, leading her up the steps into the building.  “This is where the ceremony will take place,” I said as I entered. It was my family’s tradition to be married here.  

“Cathédrale du Nord,” the princess read the inscription on the side of the building, she stood just in the doorway.  

“It just means cathedral of the north or something along the lines of that.”

She nodded, finally entering the building. “This is where we’ll be married,” I don’t know if it was a statement or a question but I nodded anyway.  “Didn’t know your family was religious,” statement, this time. 

“We’re not, the cathedral was built long before Northcy,” I looked around the building, not recalling the last time I was here, “past generations of my family were religious, having attended mass nearly every Sunday, but that hasn’t happened since before the war.” 

“Why?” She looked at me like I was there when they decided to stop attending. 

However, my schooling taught me the answers nevertheless, “mass was canceled in the beginning. This place was a shelter for those who had homes on the front line.” Modia and Northcy share a border, which at one time was a free passage, or so the books say.  “After a while, I guess my great-great-grandparents just stopped going.” 

I don’t know the exact reason why they stopped, the books say war made them too busy, but any believer would argue ‘no one is too busy for God.’ 

The princess just nodded, looking around the building, I checked my phone finally.

Jaemin: we’re in the middle of questioning the Park siblings. 

Jaemin: Taeyong is talking to Jisung, you know Taeyong always had a soft spot for the boy

Jaemin: Taeyong refuses to allow me to talk to Jisoo

Jaemin: Johnny is talking to her, Taeyong says it’s since she doesn’t know him

Jaemin: She threw Jisung under the bus immediately, wtf? This bitch is saying that this is all Jisung. 

Jaemin: All the evidence points to Jisung, he made a huge cash withdrawal, Hansol confirmed to meeting with Jisung, there are images of their meeting. This isn’t good.

Jaemin: Mark is gonna talk to her, and pretend he doesn’t know anything yet 

Jaemin: Dude now that it’s mark, she’s bawling, wtf? I’m telling you, I never liked her.

Taeyong: Jisung says he’ll confess to everything if we agree that Jisoo gets full immunity from all current and future evidence regarding this case.

My fiancée was almost killed by my ex-girlfriend’s brother and Jaemin had still managed to make me chuckle at his commentary of the situation. Jisung didn’t do this though, he didn’t come up with this idea to scare the princess, this was all Jisoo, right? I type a quick response to Taeyong: ‘No, this has Jisoo written all over it. We can’t allow Jisung to take the fall for this, not yet at least.’ The death sentence is illegal in Northcy, but considering the attack was against the princess, she can have him extradited to Modia and tried there. I don’t know what will happen to him then. I texted Jaemin back as well, ‘I know you didn’t like her.’ As soon as I hit send, it seemed like the flashing dots appeared to show Jaemin typing, his response coming up even faster.

Jaemin: you good? I know you loved her

He was right. 

Me: emphasis on lovED

I shoved my phone back into my pocket, turning back to the princess. She was up by the alter while I still stood in front of the doors. She looked absolutely breathtaking up there. The father, priest, pastor, pope, the guy in charge, came out of the woodworks. It seemed he and the princess were exchanging words, I could see her expression fall, I made my way closer to them. When I was close enough to hear. 

“You ought to be ashamed of yourself,” the father was angry, “coming here, in this house where many mourned for your war, you dient girl.”

“Father,” I questioned, I knew my tone held a rude, defiant tone, “what is the meaning of this?” I looked at the princess, whose tears were falling slowly. It seemed as if all she did when she was with me was cry and it pained me inexplicably. 

“Your Royal Highness,” the priest tone softens, “this girl is not welcomed here, she has done nothing but caused pain for the people.” 

“Father, she is my fiancée and the future queen of Northcy, she will be welcomed wherever she pleases to go,” this man was nearly thrice my age, maybe older, I should not be taking this tone with him, “she is the reason millions more won’t lose their lives.” 

“Well, she is not welcome here, so long as I am the high priest.” Oh, so he is a priest, glad to know I was correct about one thing. 

“Well, father, it looks you’re out of a job then,” I stated, grabbing the princess’ hand pulling her out of there. 

“You don’t have that power,” the priest yelled as I increased the distance between us, “only God has that power.” 

“No, Father. I have that power because your house lies in my land,” I yelled back, now turning to be facing the man. I was beyond furious, no longer caring about my image, “you’re done, father. You’ll never work as a priest anywhere in my kingdom. There are more priests than just you.” I took a few steps, closing some of the distance between me and him, “I will find another to replace you, and I’ll have God on my side as I do so,” I spoke the last part in a normal voice. The priest was red in the face. Seeing him so angry made my own anger subside. 

Turning back around, I led the princess out of the building back into the car. She wiped the tears that had fallen away, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know the father was gonna act like that.” 

“It’s fine, not your fault,” she offered me a small smile.  

“What happened anyway?” I started to drive, who knows where now.

“Father said I looked familiar, asked if I had been there before. I told him no, I’m not from here. He asked where I was from. I said I was from Modia, and then he recognized me, said I was the Modian princess that the prince was gonna marry. I said yes. He became furious, telling me that it was shameful that I walked where widows of soldiers walked. I should be ashamed of myself.” The princess was struggling to continue on. 

“He said ‘dient girl’, what does that mean?” I didn’t recognize the word.

“It comes from a script, ‘le roi unt matent e dient roi, mena son palpel ea mete dit. Pezon nona scape, monne, fonne, infene, sufre de don cupidite.’ It means ‘the king now being a dient king, lead his people to their death. No one was spared: men, women, children, suffered for his greed.’ It comes from a story of a king who became so obsessed with power, that he killed all of his people to acquire their land. The story is meant to teach young royals that we rule over people, not land. We are in this position because they say that it’s okay, and if we abuse that power, like the king in the story, we become nothing but monsters. The story became a Modian favorite, but the word dient was twisted over time; it wasn’t even a word me and my siblings were allowed to mutter. Mother thought it was a dirty word.” 

“Oh,” I was at a loss for words. How could I make this better?

“Dient, it’s from an old Modian language that is seldom used and mostly forgotten by the majority. A rough translation of the word is devil.” She paused, calming herself down, “a more accurate translation, it means ‘something or someone possessed by pure evil, only meant to bring pain and suffering to those around them.” 

“You’re not.”

“Excuse Me?” The princess looked at me from her seat.  

“You’re not a dient girl, you’re not possessed by something evil, you do not cause the people around you pain and suffering. You are not evil,” I looked at the princess, she was staring back at me. I wrapped my hand around hers, “you’re not a dient girl.” 

“Thank you,” she smiled, pulling my hand into her lap, continuing to hold it.  

We spent the rest of the day out of the palace. I tried taking the princess to places that wouldn’t have lots of people, but it seemed as if wherever we went, there was somebody. Most of the people that saw us were kind, the majority stared, some gave dirty looks, but none were as confrontational as the priest. I had sent a text over to Jung, Father’s butler, about what I said to the priest. Jung confirmed that they will have a new high priest and the other guy will be out of a job before the weekend.

I got another text, this one confirming that a surprise for the princess has arrived.  Jaemin gave me continuous updates. Apparently, they brought in Lord and Lady Park. Jaemin says Lord Park was clueless to all of this and there isn’t any evidence suggesting that he or Lady Park had any involvement in it. However, Lady Park did throw Jisoo under the bus, saying that her daughter wanted the princess dead, and it isn’t a surprise that she would go this far.  Taeyong says that Lord Park believes Jisung is more innocent than guilty, Jisoo always did have her younger brother wrapped around her finger. But Jisung technically already confessed.

—————-

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My Duty As Princess

Chapter 05

Lee Jeno x fem reader

masterlist

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview, 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:suggestive content, violence, explicit language

Word Count: 5.1K

Authors Note: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE ONE AND ONLY LEE JENO. I actually have something for his birthday but it’s in debate about posting it lmaoooo hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

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Jeno was hovering above you, your legs wrapped around his waist. You could feel all of him. You threw your head back deeper into the pillows as Jeno started to move faster, deeper.  Your hands flew to Jeno’s hair, tugging on strands. You felt his hands gripping your waist. You moaned, the pleasure too intense, your hands dropped to Jeno’s shoulder, clawing at it. Jeno’s hand moved up against your body, wrapping around your throat, squeezing. Too tight, you thought, too tight. You literally couldn’t breathe.

Your eyes flew open. You were still dressed, a masked man hovering above you, hands wrapped around your throat, trying to squeeze the life out of you. You tried to reach up for his face, you tried to scream but all you could do was just gasp for air. You reached for something to hit him with, but your hands couldn’t land on anything. You started to twist and turn, trying to pry his hands off, your legs kicking at the man above you, hoping for the ounce of strength to push him off of you. A knee to the crotch did it; he finally let go of your throat. You fell out of the bed with him, and he tried to grab your body again. You pushed to your feet running to the door, but he gripped your waist pulling you back, throwing you onto the bed. ‘You will need to learn to defend yourself,’ your father’s words rang in your ears. You swung your elbow, hitting the guy square in the jaw. 

“You bitch,” he mumbled, causing the fear to run down your spine. He pulled his hand back, slapping you, moving your head with the force. You kicked at him, causing him to stumble back. You broke the doors open.

You pulled open the second set of doors, running to god-knows-where. You felt the man’s presence, felt him behind you, felt him chasing you. ‘I have guards surrounding me 24/7 father, no one would dare to attack me,’ was your retaliation to your father in defense class. You forgot to scream as you run, to scream for help; you didn’t even know exactly where you were running to. You saw the doors to Jeno’s room. You had put a decent distance between you and the guy, but certainly not enough. 

You pounded on the door, another memory coming to mind. ‘(Y/n), stop just barging into my bedroom,’ your sister scolded you once, all you could do was hope he was awake. You had a nightmare that night, one of a monster chasing you in the forest. But this was reality, and the other guy was too close. Thinking ‘fuck it, if I’m still alive I’ll apologize,’ you pushed the doors for Jeno’s chambers open. You shoved yourself inside, holding your breath in fear that a single noise could put your life in more danger. 

The guy was too close, coming up to the door behind you trying to push it open, trying to get to you. You pushed back, as hard as you could, but you felt the life draining from your arms. Your face was stinging, your throat was tight, your feet burned, your legs were jelly, and all your energy was drained. All you could think was this is it: this is where you’re going to die. This man is gonna kill you. 

-

I heard a pounding noise that sounded like it was coming out of my wall. I rolled over in bed, grabbing my phone off the nightstand, looking at the time. It read 2:06 am. Who in the hell is pounding on my door at 2 in the morning? I pulled myself up out of bed, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I opened the doors to my seating area, giving my eyes a second to adjust. I saw someone, the princess, the moonlight illuminating sweat that dripped down the side of her face, her arms pushing against the chamber doors as if someone else was trying to force their way in.

“Princess,” I called out to her in the darkness of the room. The moonlight was the only thing shining in the room. Relief washed over her when she finally made out my face. Abandoning the door, she rushed over to me. Hiding behind my stance, a man followed behind her. He wore black clothing and a mask around his face, a pocket knife in one hand. “Who are you?” 

The man looked to me and then to the princess, then back to me, and ran out the door.  “Hey!” I yelled to him. I was ready to chase after him, but there was a tug on my wrist. I looked back to see the princess, her hair a mess, tears running down her face, nightgown torn. She didn’t look like the strong, knowledgeable princess I’ve grown to love; she looked scared, broken, hurt. “Stay here,” my voice was firm with her, I could only hope I didn’t scare her. I took off chasing the man that left my room.  

The look back to the princess was only a mere second, so it wasn’t hard to catch up with the guy. I yelled the whole time, probably waking everyone in the palace. By the time I tackled the guy to the ground, Mark and Haechan were behind me. Mark held one arm, Haechan holding the other.  Noble families began coming out of their rooms, watching the commotion take place.  I pulled the mask off the guy, and I didn’t recognize the face I saw.

“Your Highness,” a palace guard said, gaining my attention. I was the one who started this; I needed to give the order.  

“Um, ah, uh. Take him to the holding.” The image of the princess, scared, broken, hurt flashed in my mind. “I’ll be down there in a moment, I need to check on someone,” I directed my attention to the guard, he and his partner nodded, taking the guy from Mark and Haechan’s hold. “Everyone back to bed, nothing to see here,” I announced to the onlookers. I started to make my way back to my chambers where I left the princess. With each step, I started going faster, and before I knew it, I was basically spiriting back to my room. 

When I got there, Fei and Mei were in the main area, talking to closed doors. “Princess, please, let us in,” Mei said, her voice strained.  

“(Y/n), this is ridiculous; open this door,” Fei’s voice was rough.  

“Your Highness,” Mei said when she noticed me standing there. I noticed a blush dance across her cheeks, then remembered my current lack of shirt. Mei trained her eyes on the floor, “the princess refuses to allow us in to see her.” 

I nodded. I don’t know what happened, but I do know that she’s afraid. “Call Chan, if she refuses me, she might see him,” it took everything in me to mutter those words. I made my way to the door, knocking softly. “Princess, it’s me, it’s Jeno, will you let me in please?” I leaned my head against the door. I know that, in reality, she had no reason to trust me or want my presence, especially in a moment like this. However, I did hear the quiet click of the door unlocking. I turned the handle pushing the door slightly, only big enough for me to enter.  Closing it behind me, I saw the princess shaking like a leaf on the other side of the room. “It’s only me,” I said, my hands raised. I took a step towards her. I just wanna know if she’s okay. “I got him,” I hoped that this would provide any relief. I took a step closer. I don’t wanna scare her.  “He won’t hurt you anymore, I promise,” I stood up straight, my hands reaching for her. The princess all but leaped forward, hugging me. I held onto her tightly, resting my chin on her head, afraid that if I let go, she would disappear before my eyes. She was sobbing, and all I could do was shush her and pet her head. How could I let this happen? I made my way to the edge of the bed, sitting down, holding her between my legs, pulling her into my lap. 

After a minute of her in my lap, I pulled away to look at her. She stood in between my legs, her eyes were puffy and red, trained on the floor, cheeks were wet from all the tears. Her neck was starting to turn red and purple, her cheek was red too. I reached up to feel, but she flinched and looked away. I recoiled my hand a bit, before returning it to feel the soft skin. Careful not to press too hard, I pulled my fingertips across her neck. More tears rolled down from her eyes, as tears welled in my own. How did this happen? I felt a million and one questions run through my mind, and the more I stared at the princess the more guilty I felt.

“Is this all he did to you?” I felt like all I could see was red. “Please tell me this is all he did,” I asked the princess, my bottom lip shaking. She nodded in response. I stood, pulling her close to me.  

“I’m okay,” she whispered into me, “I’m alive.” It’s not enough; her just being alive isn’t enough for me. Something needs to be done.

I opened the door to the rest of the chamber. Mark, Haechan, Jaemin, Chan, Hyunjin, Father, Mother, Fei, Mei, Grandma Lee, and Johnny stood there. 

The princess turned in towards me, not daring to look at anyone, or see anyone look at her.  “I want him dead.” 

“Son, now wait,” Father started speaking, holding his hands up to stop me.  

“I want him dead,” I repeated, this time the anger and hurt were evident; tears were rolling down my face. “He nearly killed her and got away with it.” Father’s gaze softened, but he wasn’t convinced. “If you won’t do it, I will,” I said sternly. I’ve never used such a tone against him, but I couldn’t help it.

Father pressed his lips into a thin line, but nodded his head, and turned away, talking to Johnny, Mark, and Haechan. I bent down to the princess, to whisper into her ear, “who do you want?” 

“I don’t want anyone, I just want you,” she whispered, her voice was trembling. I just nodded.  

“Leave,” I didn’t want to be rude, but I know it came out that way, “all of you, just leave.” I was tired, and my only concern right now was the princess, not any of their feelings. They all silently made their way out of my chambers. I ushered the princess onto my bed. She had stopped shaking, but she still looked scared. I turned around to see Chan lingering, but he was about to leave. “Chan,” I called to gain his attention. Grabbing a throw blanket from the bed, I tossed it to him, “take the couch, it’s better than the barracks.” 

He nodded. “Thanks,” was all he could mutter, not that I needed it. I turned back around, closing the doors to my sleeping area. I made my way towards the bed, sliding under the covers next to the princess. As soon as my arms wrapped around her, she buried herself deeper into me, no longer sobbing, but still crying.

Having a moment to just breathe after such a long and exhausting day felt unreal. All of the day’s events finally sunk into my mind. The woman who was torn from her home had an undoubtedly traumatic response in this place where I should’ve been able to protect her. Attacked, choked, chased through the kingdom in an attempt to escape his claws of abuse and cruelty. It was one of the cruelest things that have happened in this kingdom, but unfortunately, probably, took second place. It didn’t compare to the cruelty of a weak heart. 

Jia was born with one. When I was only three, holding her when she was freshly born, my mom told me that, in no instance ever, would it be okay for me to touch her chest or shoulders, in case of hurting her. The memory rushed back to me as if it were only yesterday. It’s probably my earliest, most vivid memory. It was also one that I tried so hard to suppress but had been coming back recently. Something about (Y/n) is opening my heart, which many would say is good, but it also means I have to face these horrific events I spent years convincing myself didn’t happen: I didn’t have a sister. I didn’t spend countless nights by her hospital bed, gently prodding her to eat something, anything, even if she felt like she couldn’t keep it down. She wasn’t hesitant to eat even plain bread because she didn’t want to throw up in front of her older brother, arguing that it was ‘unladylike.’ I didn’t have to hold her hair back while she wretched into a bucket, whispering affirmations that she was doing well. I didn’t have to convince not only her but myself that she would recover. She didn’t have a hard time with strength and stability; she could walk to her bathroom without a walker or my arm to lean on. She wasn’t holding onto dear life through feeding tubes at the mere age of twelve. Her heart didn’t finally give up on her, even after we tried all of the medicines and natural recovery systems known to man…

-

“Jeno?” Your soft, questioning voice brings him out of his haunting thoughts.

“Yes, princess?” He whispers back, voice hoarse and filled with a melancholy tone that you never expected to hear from him. 

“Are you okay?” You ask gently, sitting up, looking down at Jeno. If it weren’t for that simple question, he wouldn’t have even realized that tears were rapidly falling from his eyes. He hadn’t felt himself cry- let himself cry- for countless years. You turned on a small lamp and fetched the tissues, gently pressing them to the apples of his red cheeks.

He nods a bit. “I-I’m sorry…” he takes a deep breath and continues. “I h-have a lot of stuff I haven’t told you… I don’t really have the energy to tell you right now, but I’m just feeling a lot of things right now.”

You smile softly and help him sit up, letting him use tissues for his nose. “I understand,” you feel your own eyes start to get wetter again. 

Jeno chuckles softly and wipes your eyes in return. He never saw himself in the arms of a princess he was arranged to marry, crying over shared sadness, but here he was, being more vulnerable than he had since he was fifteen. It was a special yet bittersweet moment, and you both knew it changed your perspectives of each other greatly. Nothing would be the same after this.

Even after a couple of hours laying in silence next to Jeno, you could still feel the evil hand around your throat. You hated that you laid in Jeno’s arms without apologizing to him, hated that you couldn’t sleep, hated that you couldn’t stop the tears falling. You wanted to be back home, back in your bed, in your untorn pajamas, in your palace, in your kingdom, where you weren’t attacked. You wanted to feel safe.

Jeno’s arms only provided a semblance of safety. Jeno: sweet, kind, loving Jeno. The prince you have grown so fond of, the prince you fell in love with, the man willing to become a murderer for you. The words ‘I want him dead’ and ‘if you won’t, I will,’ weren’t exactly what you wanted to hear, but it would be a lie to say they didn’t offer some kind of comfort, in their own twisted, wicked way.

You thought Jeno had dozed off hours ago, but when you looked up at the prince that lay next to you, you saw his eyes half-open, staring back at you. “You’re up?” you questioned the prince, in a voice that was softer than a whisper.  

“Couldn’t sleep,” Jeno’s voice was deep, the noise almost registering too low for your ears. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Princess, you don’t need to apologize for what-”

“Not for that,” you cut Jeno off, the need to say this weighing too heavily on your mind, “for how I treated you a couple of nights ago.” You needed to make this right. “I was jealous of yours and Jisoo’s relationship, and so I pulled Chan into it.” You stopped, trying to collect all your thoughts, what to say to make this right, but there was only one thing to say: “I’m sorry for how I treated you, it was unfair.”

“I’m sorry as well, princess. I had no right to act the way I did,” Jeno offered a small smile. “I want you, and only you. I don’t get to have it all, nor do I want it all. I’m done playing both sides.”  

You offered Jeno a small smile, pushing closer to him. He tucked a few strands of hair behind your head looking at you with so much love. It hurt. He was hurt, you could tell in his eyes: he was hurting, you were hurting. 

“Please,” Jeno closed his eyes, almost willing his request away, “please tell me what happened, I need to know.” 

You were gonna pull away, but Jeno’s grip on you tightened. You looked at him again, looked into him, unable to understand why he was so hurt. 

“Why?” Was all you could come up with. 

“I just need to know,” Jeno looked into you, “if not tonight, sometime later, tell me what happened, please.”  He didn’t want to push you into anything you were uncomfortable with, but not knowing exactly what happened was gnawing at him. 

“I don’t know…I don’t know everything, when I woke up, he was on top of me, choking me. I kicked him, shoved him off, ran to your room, and then you know.” Your cheeks felt wet again, you looked up at him, tears rolling down his cheeks onto yours, “that’s all I remember.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

You wonder why he says such a phrase. Why was he sorry? He had no reason to be. He couldn’t have known what was going to happen. It was impossible for anyone to predict, but he felt guilt swimming in his gut. You were already forced to come here, to start a new life with new people in new surroundings. The least he could’ve done was to make sure you were secure. A mere snap of his fingers would bring an entire army to stand outside your chamber doors, but he didn’t think to do it, and now, you had to go through the trauma of a near-death experience. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you, I’m sorry I wasn’t there, I’m sorry I let this happen.” 

Now it was your turn to cry again, not once in the several hours did you ever think to ever blame Jeno for the events of tonight. You wrapped your arms around Jeno’s neck trying to pull him closer as if that was even possible. He felt like your lifejacket in the middle of freezing cold, endless ocean. 

“It’s not,” you felt Jeno’s arms wrap tighter around your waist. “It’s not your fault, this isn’t your fault.” You took Jeno’s face in your hands, the sunlight starting to come into the room through the window.  Jeno’s eyes were red, hurt, you wanted to ease his pain. The two of you lay there staring at each other, both of you broken, hurt, and trying to ease the other pain. After an hour of silence, you finally felt the sleep consuming you, trying willfully to keep your eyes open, to stare back at Jeno for just a little longer. 

“Sleep, princess,” Jeno whispered to you. Your body betrayed you, your eyes feeling heavier before they completely closed.

-

“Sleep, princess,” I whispered. Her eyes closed. Finally, she was sleeping. In these past several hours of laying with her here, I had hoped she would just sleep, but she fiddled her fingers, observed my room, studied my figure; she did everything but sleep. 

She was only sleeping for maybe ten minutes, and I felt my eyes become heavy, but there was a knock at the door that pulled me from sleeping. I tried to move out from under her without waking her. I longed for her arms around me again when I stood from the bed. I pulled the covers over her, kissing her head. I made my way to the door, opening it only enough to push outward. On the other side of the door stood Jaemin, Mark, and Haechan. Chan must’ve left a while ago; the blanket that I tossed to him was folded on the couch.  

“How is she?” Haechan asked, showing genuine concern.  

“She’s,” I had no words for how the princess was doing, I didn’t even know how I was doing, “she’s alive.” I sat on the couch in the room, Mark sitting on one of the chairs adjacent to me, Haechan and Jaemin remained standing. 

“The guy is in holding, Taeyong is on his way home already,” Mark informed me of the facts. “Taeyong said that he and Johnny will see to questioning the guy personally.” There was another knock at the chamber doors this time, gaining everyone’s attention. 

“Jaemin, can you?” He nodded, going to open the door. Taeyong wasn’t supposed to be back until the day before the wedding; I should thank him for coming home early for this. Jaemin was whispering to whoever was on the other side, refusing to let them in, I assumed. “Jaemin, who is it?” 

Jaemin sighed, stepping aside letting that person in. In walked Jisoo, her head hung heavy, which was weirder than ever. “What do you even want?” Jaemin hissed out to her. The two of them never seemed to get along. I wanted to laugh; them not getting along was once my biggest problem. Now it seems so insignificant.

“I just want to talk,” Jisoo looked with sad eyes, the same sad eyes she would use when I denied her invitations to parties, “to Jeno,” she directed her attention to me now, “privately, please.” Even if this morning’s events didn’t happen, I don’t think I would speak with Jisoo.

“Now’s not a good time, Jisoo,” I sighed. Whatever pleading she wanted to do about our relationship, I didn’t have the time for it.  

“Please, Jeno,” Jisoo rushed towards me, kneeling before me, hands on my knees, “I just want to explain.” 

“What?” I asked, I know it sounded harsh, I know it sounded rude, but I really don’t have the energy to do this right now. I looked at her, more confused than ever.

“He didn’t-,” before she could say some more, I heard this soft voice calling out to me. It was a whine, almost a sob. It sounded like the princess. I stood up, turned around, and rushed to the doors of the bedroom. I opened the door to see the princess sitting up on the bed, crying.  Jaemin, Haechan, Mark, and Jisoo behind me looked into the room, seeing the princess. I rushed to the bed to grab onto the princess, “hey, hey, it’s okay, I’m here.” 

The princess’ cries died down, burying her head in my chest. “I’m sorry,” I could barely hear her whisper into me.  

“It’s okay.”

She let out a breath. I didn’t know what to say anymore.

“You’re okay,” was all I knew to say.

She nodded her head, finally calming down enough to stop crying.

I glanced behind me to see everyone standing there, “Jaemin, figure out what she wants to say. Mark, Haechan, make sure no one comes in here unless it’s you guys or Taeyong.” 

“Okay,” Mark softly said, the four of them filing out of my chambers.  After the doors had closed, I slowly pulled away from the princess, looking at her. 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” words tumbled out of the princess’s mouth faster than I could comprehend. She was shaking, sweating, she looked like she ran a marathon. “I didn’t know you were talking to people, I didn’t know you were right there,” she started to breathe heavier, her eyes darting back and forth, not looking at me. “I’m sorry, I…”

“Hey, hey, stop. It’s okay, it’s okay, just breathe.” I started to make her match my breathing, slowing her down. She nodded her head. “What happened?”

“It was just a bad dream,” she said, finally calming down completely.  

“Okay,” I said, trying to slow my own heart rate down. I looked at the princess, taking in all of her right now, she was scared. I don’t want her to be afraid; I need to make sure she feels safe. “Do you want to take a shower?” 

“Okay,” she whispered, staring at her hands, not meeting my eyes, “but don’t leave me.” The last part was even softer, like saying it caused her pain.

“Never.” ‘I won’t ever leave you again,’ were the words that reverberated in my mind. It was a promise, one that I was determined to never break. 

-

Jeno’s bathroom was surprisingly clean. You thought about your brother, whose bathroom always seemed to be a mess, but Jeno’s looked spotless, almost like he didn’t use it at all. You stood in the shower, allowing the water to fall over you. Jeno said that he was gonna be just right outside the door. The thought of being alone terrifies you right now.  

Jeno left a pile of clothes on the counter- a pile of his clothes. You refused to let him go to your room and fetch your own clothes. He said he would have Fei or Mei grab clothes from your room, but in the meantime, just wear his clothes. You got out of the shower, dried off, and dressed. Jeno’s shirt didn’t fit him anymore, but it felt like you were swimming in it, same with the sweatpants. The clothes had a lingering scent of him; it was a mixture between his cologne and his soap: a scent so personalized that you could recognize it anywhere. 

When you walked out of the bathroom, Jeno was changed into a new set of clothes. He sat on the edge of the bed, using his phone. He looked up, hearing the door open. He smiled at you, making your heart swell. Then his eyes turned sad, “we have to go to the doctor.” 

You shuddered at the thought of having even more people looking at you.  

“It’s just a precaution, just to make sure everything is okay,” Jeno reached out for you. 

You basked in his embrace, nodding your agreement. Jeno gave you one of his hoodies to put on, covering the markings. You allowed him to pull you through the palace, and drive you to the doctor’s office. You didn’t see his guards or your own, or maybe you weren’t even looking for them. Jeno kept one hand on your thigh, a physical reminder that he was still there.  

The doctor’s visit went by in a blur. Jeno did most of the talking, while you sat there waiting for it to be over. The doctor said that you needed an x-ray. You looked at Jeno, hoping for a way out; you didn’t want to be left alone. Jeno just rubbed your arm and nodded his head. He followed you to the x-ray machine; the doctor allowed him to be in the room with you. Jeno’s voice was comforting for you, especially in such a hard time. 

At the end of the visit when you finally arrived back at the palace, you felt more tired than ever.  “I want to take a nap,” you whispered to Jeno softly, making your way up the stairs in the palace. Jeno nodded his head, leading you back to your own chambers.  

When you arrived at the door, you just shook your head. You couldn’t go back there, not yet anyway. “What?” Jeno asked, looking at you with concern, not understanding what was wrong. 

“Not here,” you walked away from your chambers. 

“Oh,” Jeno looked confused, the light bulb not screwed in all the way yet. “OH,” Jeno said again, finally understanding. He led you back to his own chambers, “here better?” he questioned. You nodded to the prince. You were so tired and felt like a zombie. Jeno led you to his bed. It was made now; it seemed that the two-hour doctor visit was all the maids needed to fix and clean the room. 

Jeno drew back the covers, for you. Your eyelids felt heavy the second your head hit the plush pillow. “Stay, please,” you whispered, or at least you thought you whispered it, but you didn’t recall hearing a response.  In fact, you didn’t recall much from the last few hours.

-

“Stay, please,” the princess whispered, it was softer than a mouse.  

“Always,” I don’t think she heard my response; it looked like she fell asleep before I finally responded to her. I smiled. Thank god she was finally sleeping. I sat at the edge of the bed, watching her for a minute, hoping that she would stay asleep. It looked like she was sleeping deeply, something that I knew she was in desperate need of. 

I let out a breath and grabbed some clothes out of my dresser, deciding to take a shower. I thought about all the events of the past ten hours, and by god, my body felt exhausted. I finally felt like I could sleep. Jaemin sent me a text earlier with an update: Taeyong got home several hours ago, and he’s already been questioning the guy. Mark and Haechan both are working with Johnny, going over the security cameras, and seeing who wasn’t supposed to be in the palace but was. Father and Mother were working with advisors to keep the incident out of the news, Grandma Lee was meeting with the noble families to make sure nothing got out. Everything I could think of was taken care of. The thought made me let out a sigh of relief. 

After my shower, I got into bed, pulling the princess close, and sleep took over. Nothing but everything at the same time felt right.

————–

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My Duty As Princess

Chapter 04

Lee Jeno x fem reader

masterlist

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview,01,02,03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:none (?)

Word Count: 6.9K

Authors Note: This was suppose to come out like last week Saturday, but I was so focused on finishing my history paper that I didn’t post. I’m sorry guys but I hope you can enjoy it now. hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

OH YEAH NEW SCENE HERE GUYS

——————

Dinner was over and Jeno just left you at your chamber doors. “Chan, a word?” You looked to your guard and walked through your doors, him following ensuite. 

“Yes, my princess?” He shut the door behind him. 

“Chan, it’s me,” you pleaded. 

“(Y/n), what’s wrong?” He took a step closer to you, taking your face in his hand.  

“You’re not angry with me?” You paused, not finding the right words. 

“My princess, are you trying to ask me if I’m okay with you and the prince?” Chan laughed a little, looking at you, pulling his hand away. 

“Chan, I’m being serious.” He put his hand up, stopping you. 

“(Y/n), I will always love you, but it’s time I step back and let you go,” Chan offered a sad smile, taking a step away from you. You wanted to reach out and pull him close, but your arms wouldn’t move, you felt the tears welling in your eyes. 

“Always?” you questioned, wanting him to stay a little longer, “you’ll always love me, even if I love someone else?”

“I will always love you, my princess,” he smiled walking out the door, leaving you to your thoughts. You could feel the tears fall down your face, but you couldn’t even understand why you were crying. You had an amazing day with Jeno; it finally felt like this union was more than a business contract, but you were selfish. You wanted more, you wanted a romance-filled marriage with Jeno, a kingdom to serve, but you also wanted a relationship with Chan, just like back at home. You wanted it all: everything and everyone. 

-

Three weeks away from the wedding, everything was finally in order. There were no more meetings with vendors or talking about options you had. The planning was done. There were a few last things to manage, but it was just the finalization of details. Chan and Hyunjin finally stopped following you everywhere in the palace, but they did remain close most of the time. 

It was weird to wake up to Mei and Fei delivering you news. Most days, they were cleaning around your chambers as you lolled about in bed after turning off your alarm. This time, though, Mei turned off the alarm shortly after it rang. You furrowed your brows gently, rubbing your eyes as you adapted to the golden sun streaming in through the sheer curtains. “Hello?”

The girls giggled at your response. “Good morning, princess,” Fei greets, adjusting the skirts of her dress. 

“G’morning?” It comes out more as a question than a statement or greeting. 

“You’re really dragging today,” Mei hums. “Prince Jeno is waiting for you.”

“What? Why?” You sat up, stretching your arms above your head.

“He did not inform us of the details but told us that you don’t need to worry about dressing nicely or anything. A simple dress will suffice.”

You hum thoughtfully, getting up to use the bathroom and freshen up. You were confused as to what he was planning. It couldn’t have been anything with Lords, Ladies, and their families, because professionalism and grace were essential. You brush through your hair, tipping your head to the side as you examine your appearance. It almost felt weird to look at yourself this long. Fei and Mei usually tended to your appearance, and you trusted that they would always do their best to enhance it. Mei entered your bathroom, holding up your hair as Fei clicked your necklace on, the silver crown charm glittering in the lights of the vanity mirror. Mei gave you a simple blue dress with a nice square neckline, showing off your collarbones covered in soft, silky skin. 

“You look stunning, princess,” Fei smiles. “Now go,” she all but shoves you out of the room, seeing Jeno as soon as you’re out of the door.

“Hey!” You were trying to scold the woman, but you basically said it to Jeno, since you were looking up at him with wide eyes. You weren’t expecting him to be right there.

“Hey!” He said back to you, just as intensely as you accidentally did. He had a mischievous glint in his eyes, clearly knowing that you didn’t mean to say it to him.

You bow deeply to him to hide the blush on your cheeks, not thinking about how, when you bowed, he would probably be able to see down your dress. However, Jeno most definitely noticed it. He knew it was wrong to look at your chest, but it was an involuntary reaction, especially considering how rarely you showed that area of skin. 

“Good morning, princess.”

“Good morning, prince Jeno,” you smiled. “What’s on the agenda for today?”

“You said you wanted to learn how to play the guitar,” he says as if it’s obvious. 

“Yes? But I didn’t assume that you would be wanting to any time soon,” you explained. “With the wedding coming up, there are a lot of things to be thinking about and doing.”

“As you know, most of the preparations are in place. We have time for leisure. So, are you ready?”

“I suppose,” you chuckle and follow his lead. 

He led you to a small room with large windows which overlooked the blooming garden. It was nearly empty, just a couple of couches and chairs around the room. 

“What even is this room?” You ask curiously. You had never been in a room like this.

He chuckles at your question and waves for his servants to come in. They give him an acoustic guitar and a music stand with some sheet music resting on it. “It’s a flex room. It’s just here for when we need it. Otherwise, it’s usually used as a place for the servants to relax,” he explains. 

You hum and nod to acknowledge his explanation and get seated on one of the couches. “It’s nice and cozy.”

He smiles and sits next to you, readjusting the music stand and getting his guitar situated in his lap. He thanks the servants and lets them know that they are allowed to leave. “Are you excited to learn?” He grins, strumming casually to make sure the instrument was tuned correctly. 

You nod shyly, surprised by how talented he was with it; it looked effortless for him. 

“Well, let’s start, then,” he grins and puts the guitar in your lap, taking your hands in his to start you out correctly. You feel small and cared for. His touch was gentle. 

“So put your hand here… and here,” his voice was deep but soft, chin nearly resting on your shoulder. “Hold this string down and pluck this one.” You did as he said, and it didn’t sound too bad but was not nearly as good as when he had been playing the instrument. He chuckles softly, the small puff of air causing your skin to prickle. He thought it was really cute to see your fingers fumbling on the strings. Jeno looked even more handsome in the golden sun of the morning. He taught you a few more chords, the small smile on his face never dissipating. 

After some time, you were able to put a few different sounds together that sounded decent.

“That sounds good!” He cheers you on. “Are you ready to put them in the proper order?”

You pout at his teasing and look away, back down at the instrument in your arms. 

He giggles at your facial expression. “Oh, come on. Don’t be a baby. You can do it. You just have to change the order of them.”

“Fine,” you whine. “What order should I put them in?” He says an assortment of letters and you huff. “I can’t remember which is which by their letters.”

“You just had it,” he gently pinches your arm. “We’ll go slow,” he assures. 

“Okayyyyy.” You followed his instructions, eventually getting a tune down. “It’s twinkle twinkle little star!” You gasp excitedly, making Jeno smile widely.

“Exactly. See, you already learned the chorus of a song, after just like an hour.” He gives an I-told-ya-so look and you roll your eyes playfully.

“I’ll admit that you were right.”

“Of course I am,” he grins and wiggles his eyebrows. “Do you wanna do more or are you feeling kinda guitared out for now?”

“My brain feels a bit like mush,” you admit with a shy giggle.

He chuckles. “Fair enough. I’ll let you go back to your plans for the day.”

“There aren’t many, to be honest. I just have some studying to do until dinner tonight.”

“Alright, well try not to bore yourself to death,” he jokes, leading you out of the small room. When the servants asked if they should clean up the room, Jeno said no, and that he intended on using it for the same purpose again soon. He walks you to your room, where your guards and Fei and Mei were awaiting you. You bow thankfully to Jeno who returns the sentiment before walking back to his own chambers.

When dinnertime rolled around, Jeno insisted on walking you to the dining hall. “I can find the dining hall by myself, Your Highness.” 

-

Jeno was walking you to dinner once again in the evening. “Princess, don’t take this away from me,” Jeno smirked, looking at you, “this is the only time I’m guaranteed with you.” This walk was the one thing that was a constant in your and Jeno’s schedule.  

“Alright then, I’ll grant you the pleasure of escorting me to dinner,” you smirked, teasing the prince. The two of you turned the corner to face Park Jisoo. The sight has the mask falling into place on your face immediately. 

“Jeno,” she called out to him lovingly, looking at him with soft eyes. 

“Jisoo.” You noticed how easily the name rolled off of his tongue. He never addressed you that way- not once. 

She stepped closer, pulling at him, “we haven’t really talked for a minute now,” she sighed, still looking at him, longing for him, “I’ve missed you.” Watching them made your stomach turn. 

“I- I’m sorry,” Jeno seemed out of breath, almost afraid to say the wrong thing. Your mask was starting to crack upon hearing his tone of voice. 

“I shall leave you two to talk privately,” you said with a smile, “I’ll see you both downstairs.” You walked past them, moving to the dining hall, hoping, pleading that the mask didn’t crack all the way through. Is this what Jeno felt when he saw you with Chan? You wondered how he felt, what he thought. Was he in as much pain as you were right now? You had no right to be angry that his heart belonged to someone else, yours did too. Did, funny how one word makes all the difference. Your heart did belong to Chan; he was your love, your light, your warmth, your heart, back home. But here, here in Northcy, you embraced the cold, the sparkle of snow, the feeling of the wind in your face. Your heart belongs to Jeno now. You didn’t even notice the shift, the change when you finally fell in love with the pretty face Prince, who didn’t have a single thought bouncing around in that head of his.  

-

“I-” missed you too, is what I wanted to say but, “I’m sorry,” was what I actually did say. Jisoo, my first love, my high school sweetheart. She was born, bred to be my wife. That wasn’t a secret to anyone with half a brain. Jisoo’s parents were, are, the most powerful noble family, the only thing they didn’t have was royal status. And she was going to be exactly that, my wife.

“I shall leave you two to talk privately,” the princess smiled. It was fake, I could see right through the charade, “I’ll see you both downstairs.” She walked past the two of us, not sparing me a glance; it hurt, I can’t explain why, but it did. I was about to go after her, reach out to stop her, to wait for me, but something was holding me back, someone keeping me here. I looked down to see Jisoo’s hand wrapped around my wrist, stopping me from chasing the princess. 

“Jeno, please look at me, talk to me.” I turned to Jisoo. There were tears in her eyes, my heart broke to see her hurt. “You said you loved me. Was it a lie?”

“It wasn’t a lie,” I didn’t know what to say at this point, I loved Jisoo but I love the princess too. I just shared such a sweet, heartwarming moment with her. Very few people cared about me enough to try doing things that I was passionate about. It was probably mostly because life is so busy, but that didn’t make it feel any less special. Princess (Y/n) didn’t see me as a floating crown; she saw me as a person. Could I say the same about Jisoo? 

“Wasn’t,” she chuckled at the word, “but it is now.” Tears fell down Jisoo’s face, what do I do?

“It isn’t a lie Jisoo, I did, do love you,” I was scrambling for words at this point, anything to make this right. What do I say?

“Just not as much as you love her,” Jisoo’s voice turned venomous at the mention of the princess. Why would she say it like that?

“Jisoo, I am required to marry the princess,” I felt this invisible crown on my head, weighing my body down. It was almost as if my knees could buckle from the pressure. “I love you, Jisoo.” I do, did at least. “But I cannot continue to see you,” my breathing was even, “I love my fiancée, and I am going to make this marriage work.” I want an actual life with the princess, I want to be there for her, care for her, love her. “For me to do that, I cannot see you anymore, I cannot have two relationships.”

“I can never see you again?” Jisoo’s expression matched the same as the night I broke up with her: angry.

“I didn’t say that,” I was losing my confidence, “I just mean that we can not be sneaking around, meeting in private, you coming to my room late in the night. You and I have to stop.” 

“Ha,” she looked away, not meeting me. 

"However, it would be best,” the final marker,  cutting off someone you spent more than half your life knowing, a quarter of your life loving, “it’s best if all our meetings remain business-related.” Our relationship was over. To say it didn’t hurt me too would be a lie.

I left Jisoo standing alone in the hall and made my way to the dining hall. When I got there, some people were sitting, others were standing and talking in small groups. The food hadn’t been brought out yet, so I made my way to the front of the table where father sat. There the princess sat across from Grandma Lee, the two were deep in conversation. 

“I will support Prince Jeno in every decision that he makes, I have no intention of taking his crown from him,” I heard the princess tell Grandma Lee when I got near, “Your Majesty, I agreed to this union because I know that it will be beneficial to my people and my kingdom. No one truly forced me into this, I didn’t argue when my parents presented this to me.” The princess finished her statement. 

“I know my grandson,” I paused a little away from the table, hearing Grandma Lee speak, the two not noticing my presence just yet, “he is a good boy but he doesn’t trust easily, and for anything to work between the two of you, there needs to be trust.” Grandma Lee looked at the princess as if she had already committed treason. 

“I have gotten to know Jeno in these past few months that I have been in Northcy,” the princess paused, taking a sip of water, “and I truly trust Jeno to do what is best for our kingdoms. If you had asked me when I arrived if I trusted him, my answer would not be the same, but after getting to know him, I have no doubt that he will make a fine king.” 

The princess’ confidence in me had blood rushing to my cheeks. Her belief and trust in me fueled my ego. I made my way to the table, taking my seat next to the princess and I looked at her. She’s the girl I’m going to marry, and that thought has never brought me such joy. 

-

Dinner sitting next to the prince was anything but calm; your stomach did flips at every bite you swallowed. The way Jisoo and Jeno looked at each other was something you couldn’t erase from your memory. Jealousy, you were starting to become jealous of the relationship Jisoo and Jeno had, the relationship you wanted with Jeno. Jealousy was a nasty little thing that caused people to do nasty stupid things. And you did something very stupid. 

Now here you were standing in between Jeno and Chan wondering why you thought this was a good idea. You were stupid, you weren’t thinking and you just wanted to be with someone, so you called Chan to join you in your room around 11 pm, but Jeno wanted to go stargazing. You and Chan were just sitting on the couch, and maybe just, maybe, you kissed Chan, when Jeno walked in. So now here you were standing in between a very disappointed Chan and a very angry Jeno.  

“Your Highness, I apologize for the misunderstanding, it seems the princess wasn’t clear,” Chan said bowing to Jeno, you looked at him, utterly shocked he didn’t even attempt to put up a fight. “I’ll be taking my leave now.” 

“Chan?” you called out to him as he made his way to the door, “Are you serious right now?”

“Yes, princess. I am serious because you were mad, so you used me,” Chan was furious. Your heart started to race, tears welling in your eyes, palms sweating. This wasn’t your intention. Chan had never in the past three years ever just called you princess, it was always ‘my princess,’ and the lack of one word hurt more than you could ever imagine.

Chan walked out, slamming the door behind him. Jeno started to chuckle after Chan left. “Really, princess?” He looked at you, disgusted. “Need I remind you, you’re my fiancée?”

“Oh please, Jeno,” you were angry, Jeno had no right to judge you, “don’t make it seem you’re in love with me now.”

“Yeah, well at least I wasn’t sticking my tongue down another girl’s throat,” Jeno was starting to raise his voice. 

“You didn’t need to,” you matched his volume, “you made it evident who you loved without that.” 

“What are you even talking about?” Jeno looked at you, dumbfounded. 

“You and Jisoo, don’t pretend you’re not in love with her, Jeno,” you sighed and decided to take a seat. 

“Are you serious right now?” Jeno was growing angrier, “you make it seem like you’re in love with me when clearly you don’t care about how I feel. All you care about is your little guard.” 

“That is uncalled for,” you practically yelled, pointing at Jeno. 

“I’m right though,” he yelled at you, “you don’t love me, you love Chan, always have and always will.” 

“Don’t kid yourself Jeno, of course I love Chan and you love Jisoo, that’s that,” you spoke in a normal voice, pulling the mask on. 

“I didn’t fool around though,” Jeno said, still wanting to argue. 

“Oh yeah? You didn’t?” You heard, not from Jisoo, or Jeno, but from Fei and Mei, “what about all those nights when Jisoo came to your room?” Jeno looked shocked at your knowledge, “don’t act so surprised, you know these walls have ears and eyes,” the mask was cracking. You wanted to cry. “Don’t pretend we could make anything between us work. This marriage, you,” you gestured to Jeno, “is nothing more than my duty as princess,” you were done fighting, not having the energy for this anymore. You left Jeno sitting in the seating area of your chambers walking to the bathroom. 

After a moment you heard the door open and close. Jeno left. The tears fell, you just laid in bed crying waiting for sleep to take over. 

-

The next day, you were supposed to have breakfast at Jeno’s chambers with him. Instead, you opted to eat in your own chambers. After breakfast, you had a meeting with Queen Jaeyeon and the wedding organizer. The wedding organizer will be in charge on the day of the wedding, allowing you (more like Queen Jaeyeon) to enjoy the day. That meeting took nearly three hours, and by the time it was over, there was only an hour before you had to meet the ladies of the council’s daughters for lunch. You made it back to your chambers, changed your clothes, freshened up your makeup, and went back down to have lunch. The Luncheon was held at one of the many drawing rooms, this room was called the pink room, previously known as the princess room. The walls were painted a blush pink, and the decor was shades of pink with gold accents. By the time you made it to the room, the majority of the girls were there already, just waiting for one or two more. When you looked around the room, at the girls, you noticed only one person was missing, Park Jisoo. Of course, she was late.  

“My apologies for being late, Your Highness,” Jisoo walked in the door, smirking as she says her apologies. You thought ‘this bitch can not be serious.’

“You’re here now,” you smiled, the mask was on, “that’s what matters. Please, ladies. Let us all take our seats.” 

As soon as everyone was seated, maids brought out the food before long, you sat at the head of the table looking out to every girl there. You had never wished for Queen Jaeyeon ever in your stay in Northcy but right now, right here, you wished she was in attendance. 

“Your Highness, are you excited for the wedding?” The question came from one of the girls, Giselle, daughter of Lord Osaki.  

“Excited as anyone would be,” You wished this lunch would be over.

“Where will be the honeymoon, Princess?” Yeri asked, daughter of Lord Kim. Her family was in charge of the ports in the country. 

“The honeymoon will be pushed back until a better time.” You and Jeno were supposed to travel into Modia after the wedding, so it will most likely be pushed back.  

“Are you ready to be queen, princess?” Jisoo asked, her tone was trained. 

You were taken back by the question. “I don’t understand the nature of your question,” you said trying to mask the shock in your voice. 

“Jeno.” She looked up from her plate, shocked, placing her hand over her heart, “excuse me, I meant Prince Jeno.” ‘Fake’ is all you thought. “Prince Jeno said that King Donghae would be stepping down after the wedding,” she looked at you, the look behind her eyes were taunting, “you and the Prince are to be crowned, correct?”

The grip around your fork tightens a bit as you think about how rude it was for Jeno to tell her instead of you. The crown would be on your head- not hers. “Ah, I understand now,” the mask you wore was stronger than you thought. “Prince Jeno did inform me of this, but as it stands, King Donghae hasn’t made it official just yet.” You smiled. This is your future council, and to hell if you were gonna let someone else run it. “If King Donghae decides to go through with this, then both the prince and I will be honored to take on that duty.” You looked around at all the girls, trying to give a reassuring look. 

“Of course, your highness,” she gritted her teeth. It couldn’t be more obvious that she was fake in every corner of her being. That was the last of the questions you got; the girls returned to whispering and talking amongst themselves. No one really talked to you, just giving you looks every other sentence, looking for a nod of approval, one you always gave.  

After lunch, there was supposed to be a council meeting in which you were required to attend. There had been many council meetings since the arrivals of all the noble families, many of which you did attend, but this was the first that actually required your attendance. As you left the pink room, there was a voice calling out for you. 

“Princess (Y/n),” a girl called from behind you. You half-turned to see her, and by that time she was already next to you, “Zhong Chu-Hua, the granddaughter of Lady Zhong.” She bowed to you, showing her respect. 

“Ah, yes, I remember,” you say kindly, unsure as to why this girl needed your attention. 

“I see Jisoo has made herself known to you,” Chu-Hua spoke knowingly. 

“She has.” The two of you made your way to the throne room, where the council meeting was being held. 

“Jisoo and I have known each other since before grade school.” Zhong Chu-Hua was the eldest grandchild of the Zhong family. They owned large amounts of land, were real estate moguls. “Jisoo and the prince were always close, as I am sure you’re aware of.” 

“I am.” The two of you made your way across the main foyer, the doors of the dining hall were opening; the Lord’s lunch had ended. They were making their way to the throne room as well. 

“I don’t mean to be discourteous, princess,” you stopped to look at Chu-Hua, and she stared directly back at you. “Jisoo will do whatever necessary to get the crown, she doesn’t know what it’s like to lose.”  

You smiled at Chu-Hua, then turned and continued to walk towards the throne room, “have not to worry Chu-Hua, I will be quite alright,” you smirked. The two of you came up to the throne room. 

You looked around and saw Jeno talking to Mark and Haechan in what appeared to be a hushed voice. You turned more and saw Chan and Hyunjin in the corner. You made eye contact with Chan, but he only looked away. Your heart hurt, you had no intention of hurting Chan the way you did. You let out a breath.

“Are you alright, princess?” Chu-Hua asked, startling you. You almost forgot that she had been next to you.

“I’m sorry,” you sighed. “I’m fine, thank you.” Not a second later, the doors to the throne room were fully ajar. Thank goodness. You were getting worried for a second there. 

Walking into the throne room, you bid Chu-Hua goodbye as you made your way to the front of the room. You found the prince. No words were exchanged between the two of you.  Jeno placed a hand on the small of your back guiding you to the front of the room, the mask pulled onto your face. To anyone looking at you and Jeno, you guys would seem like a normal, loving couple.  

You sat in your seat, behind the queen’s throne on the right-hand side. Jeno’s seat was behind the king’s throne on the left-hand side. It was symbolism, to show that you and Jeno were the future. People began taking their seats in the room. Mark and Haechan’s seats were at the front of the room facing the rest of the council, but not on the elevated stage that yours and Jeno’s were. It was a row of three seats. The first remained empty. Mark sat and Haechan next to him. Lord Park’s family sat closest to the front on one side, no one in between them and the throne. Jisoo looked at you and smirked. You fiddle with the crown pendant around your neck, reminding yourself that you’re the princess and have the power.

After everyone had taken their seats, the doors behind you and Jeno opened. The king and queen entered. Everyone, including you and Jeno, rose and bowed to them as they took their seats. When King Donghae and Queen Jaeyeon stood in front of their thrones, the king waved everyone to sit. He began to make a speech after, one you tuned out before it even began. In fact, you tuned out the majority of the meeting, wishing to be in your chambers and away from everyone. 

-

I have been in countless council meetings, more often than not they were filled with people kissing up to father in attempts to get grants for whatever venture they want to pursue.  I looked over to the princess. She was obviously not paying much attention. We had put on a show for the council before the meeting started, knowing that the members would be watching.  I want to reach out to her, apologize for my behavior the other night. I didn’t have much of a right to be mad at her or react the way I did. She loved someone else and so did I. I wanted to- needed to apologize to the princess and Chan. I thought of Chan; he was someone caught in the middle, loving someone he wasn’t allowed to love.  

When the council meeting finally ended, we put on another show for the council. Father and mother left behind the door first, with the princess and I close behind. I placed my hand on the small of her back, it looked gentle and kind to anyone else, but she knew it was a show.

“Princess,” I stopped her after the doors closed behind us, “I want to apologize.” 

“You had no right,” she stabbed my chest with her finger, clearly angry, “no right at all to make me feel bad for loving Chan, especially when you’re playing both sides.” 

“Excuse me?” Playing both sides? What was she talking about?

“You, playing the role of my fiancé during the day and then playing Jisoo’s boyfriend in the evenings. Tell me, Prince Jeno, are you the only one allowed to have it all?” 

“What?” All? All of what do I have? 

“Am I the only one that has to give up a love, Prince Jeno? While you get to have both?”

No, I don’t get to have both. I don’t want both, not anymore at least. I just want you, Princess, I only have love left for you. She taught me a lot about what it felt like to actually love someone, not be tricked into loving someone. She genuinely made my heart happy. It was something that no one had done for me before- not even Jisoo. (Y/n) walked away before I could tell her any of these revelations I had made, all because of her. She left me standing there, heart in hand. 

-

The council meeting was finally over. You and Jeno put on another show for the council.  The doors closed behind you, leaving you and Jeno to stand alone. 

“Princess, I want to apologize,” Jeno started. 

As he should, he was the one that overreacted, he loved someone else, why couldn’t you? “You had no right,” you started to poke at his chest, his firm, nicely built chest, “no right at all to make me feel bad for loving Chan, especially when you’re playing both sides.” You were angry but you couldn’t figure out if you were angrier with him or yourself.  

“Excuse me?” Jeno looked clueless. Actually, it was quite adorable, but still. 

“You, playing the role of my fiancé during the day, and then playing Jisoo’s boyfriend in the evenings.” You knew Jeno loved Jisoo, knew from the moment you first saw their picture, but today, your anger peaked much more than you expected it to. Jisoo knew information that you should’ve known, that Jeno should’ve told you. “Tell me, Prince Jeno: are you the only one allowed to have it all?” 

“What?” You hated this, you wanted to be angry with Jeno, angry with him for how he acted, angry that he continued to see Jisoo, angry that you couldn’t have it all, but you couldn’t help but think if the roles were reversed, would you have acted differently than him?

“Am I the only one that has to give up a love, Prince Jeno? While you get to have both?” No matter how much you love Jeno, you couldn’t get over the fact that he blew up on you because you loved someone else just like he did. 

You walked away, leaving Jeno standing there behind you. You wanted Jeno, but you weren’t ready to let go of Chan. Not just yet. After leaving Jeno standing there, you went to find Chan in the palace barracks, hoping that he was there at the moment. 

-

When you entered the barracks, all the guards stood to bow to you.  At times you loved the power trip you felt when this happened, but at other times, like right now, you hated it. You wished you could be invisible and arrive without it being an ordeal. 

“Please, relax, rest,” you stated, waving to them to sit down, “I don’t mean to intrude.” 

“No intrusion at all, Your Highness,” Johnny, the captain of the palace guards, said. “May I ask what brings you down here, princess?”

“I came to see my guards, are they here?”

“Yes, Your Highness. Right this way,” Johnny led you through the barracks, to a small room in the back. The barracks were set up like a cabin, with a main sitting area in the front with a kitchen and then halls that lead to different bedrooms. “Right here, Your Highness.” 

You pushed open the door to a bedroom that was smaller than your bathroom. A bunk bed was up against one wall and two chairs with a small table set to the other side. Hyunjin laid on the bottom bunk, while Chan sat on one of the chairs, leaning up against the wall.  

Hyunjin stood when he noticed you in the doorway. Chan remained seated, the captain had left already.  “Princess,” Hyunjin said, bowing to you. 

“Hyunjin, please,” you grimaced at him bowing.  

“(Y/n),” Hyunjin said apologetically.

“Can you give me and Chan a minute?” 

“Of course,” Hyunjin gave you a sad smile. It was obvious that he knew.  

You entered the room and took the seat across from Chan. He stood up and made his way to the small window, looking out.  

“Chan,” you called to him, hoping he would at least look at you but he didn’t. “It wasn’t my intention to use you.” Chan scoffed, still refusing to turn to you. “But I know you felt like that, so I want to apologize,” Chan looked down, his hands in his pocket. “I love you, Chan.” 

“Stop,” Chan turned around to face you, putting his hand up to stop you. “(Y/n), I love you, you loved me.” He had put emphasis on the ‘ed’ part. You felt the tears well in your eyes. You hated how only Chan could bring you to tears in mere seconds.

“Don’t lie, (Y/n).” Chan’s words were stern, borderline hurtful.  

“I could never lie to you.” You looked down at your lap, trying to prevent the tears from falling. “That night I wanted to feel how I felt back home.” Chan’s gaze softened. “But I just hurt you instead. For that, I’m sorry.” The tears fell freely. Chan sat across from you and placed his hand on yours in your lap.  

“My princess, you know I could never stay mad at you,” Chan smiled, “but I’m not a toy for you to play with.” 

“I know that.” 

“And not for you to make the prince jealous.” 

You looked down back to your lap. “I’m sorry,” was all you could say. Chan pulled you up from your chair, but you refused to meet his gaze. He pulled you in for a hug and you felt more tears fall, crying into his chest for longer than appropriate. Chan put his hand under your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze.  

“No more tears, my princess,” he says softly, using his free hand to wipe the tears from your face. 

-

Chan walked you back to your chambers, the silence between you two was comfortable. It felt like before. You were just down the hall from your chambers.

“You need to apologize to the prince,” Chan spoke up. 

“What?” you looked at him, confused. “Why do I need to apologize to him?” 

“You were jealous. You sought comfort from another while being engaged to the prince,” Chan looked at you like you were a child, “Tell me, my princess, if you had walked in on the prince kissing the other girl, would you react differently than him?” 

You hated that Chan knew you better than most, hated that he could read every part of you, hated that he always knew where your heart lays. “I do not wish to apologize to the prince,” you said, looking away from Chan, trying to show your superiority.  

“My princess,” Chan said, grabbing your wrist. You were in front of your chamber’s door. He pulled you to face him. “Apologize to the prince, he did not do anything to deserve your jealous treatment.” Chan looked at you as if you were a child, making you pout, red rushing to your cheeks; you were ready to throw a tantrum about a stupid apology. “Don’t be a brat, and just apologize, my princess,” Chan smirked, knowing exactly what you were gonna do, “you’ll feel a lot better once you do.” He started to walk away, but before completely leaving you, he turned around, walking backward, and said “maybe you’ll get lucky,” with a wink.  

You had half a mind to chase him and scold him for making such an inappropriate comment, but at the same time, you just laughed.  You felt content, ready to let Chan go.  Hopefully, Jeno isn’t too angry with you; you hoped that you didn’t push him too far away.  

-

The evening feast for tonight was canceled, something about emergency meetings, which you gladly accepted. You were left to dine alone in your chambers, you invited Fei and Mei to eat with you, which luckily for you, they accepted. Mei had also slipped in the invitation to Hyunjin and Chan, which you were grateful for. The five of you sat in your chambers eating dinner, just like back home when everyone had meetings and you were left to roam the palace alone. The five of you laughed, talked, borderline cried, you never wanted dinner to end.  “No, but don’t you remember that time, (Y/n) beat Minho?” Hyunjin laughed, “the look on his face.”  You all laughed remembering that race.  

“Please, nothing beats the time (Y/n) flicked off the Prince of Aspos,” Fei recounted, causing Mei to choke on her drink, recalling the night.

“That was the least I could do, considering he said ‘it would be an honor to lick the honey from your toes,’” you mocked the prince of Aspos, everyone nearly died laughing recalling exactly how he sounded.  

“What about when (Y/n) threw her birthday cake, hitting the prince dead center in the face,” Hyunjin said, everyone laughed, but you paused for a minute, the mention of your late brother taking you back for a second.  

“I remember that,” you smiled to yourself, recalling that birthday, “he said ‘you can’t be queen, you’re just a big baby,’” you chuckled. Everyone was quiet now, watching you recall that evening. “I said, ‘I am going to be queen, just you watch’ and he went,” you let out a breath, the tears were there but hadn’t fallen yet. You felt like you were always crying while here, “he went ‘but you’ll be an ugly one’ and so,” you smiled. You missed your brother but you couldn’t mourn him forever, “and so, I chucked the biggest chunk of cake my hand could hold and it really hit his face dead center.” You doubled over to laugh, the rest laugh at the memory. The now-bittersweet memory. “I almost forgot about that night.” A tear was rolling down your cheek, but your smile was still evident, “thank you for reminding me, Hyunjin.”  

“Of course,” Hyunjin offered a soft smile. The rest of the night there were exchanges of stories of all the reckless things you did in Modia. You were reminded no matter how alone you felt, there were people here that cared: Fei, Mei, Hyunjin, and Chan. They cared about you, they knew, loved, adored you, and you were utterly, helplessly, whole-heartedly, and forever grateful to them. 

It was well into the night when you finally bid them a farewell, all but physically shoving them out your door. You were grateful for their company but also in desperate need of a good night’s rest. Finally getting them out the door, you hopped into the shower.  From there you did your nightly routine, changed, and got into bed. It seemed as soon as you set your phone on the nightstand, sleep took over. You had never fallen asleep so fast, and it was so relieving.

————–

Taglist:@floweronacloud@cookydream@nctstrawberrycow@marklexleaf@jvjsssnaa@thejeongjaehyun@thejungjaehyun@jackyeongljin@terjeno@tyongf-sunflower99@tgnctzen131@gooreumic@jenotation@nctdom@ficklehoe@itsveronicaxxx@actually-vl

TW: mentions of sexual assault and violence

[9:59] You should’ve known better, you were taught to know better. You wore modest clothing at work, you never got excessively drunk alone, you chose all your words carefully, you were kind towards all unwanted advances, you never stayed out super late. You told yourself a million times that you did everything right but you still found yourself in this situation. Where your boss tried to force themselves on top of you.

Luckily, you were able to get away before anything actually happened. You had run out of the room so fast that you didn’t notice, Jeno walking towards you. Jeno was gonna visit you, thinking about all the times you visited him during late night practices, he wanted to do the same.

When Jeno noticed you running towards him, not paying attention, he dropped the bag of snacks he was carrying, catching you instead.

As soon as you collided with Jeno, you were trying to push away. Jeno was trying to physically hold you still, but your body still being in flight mode, was doing anything to get away.

“(y/n),” Jeno said firmly to get your attention, his demeanor stiff from trying to hold you. When you finally looked up and seen it was him, did you start to calm down a bit. Tears were already falling from your eyes, Jeno’s demeanor softened. “What’s wrong?”

You tried to answer, but you couldn’t get the words out. And at that time your boss had caught up to you. “(y/n),” your boss called out, you didn’t have to turn around to see him wear that fake smirk, “so glad I caught you before you left, I hope you don’t misunderstand earlier.”

You physically flinch at the mention of prior events, Jeno took notice of this. Jeno didn’t know what happened, but he understood enough. His demeanor changing once again, you could feel him go into a more protective mode. Jeno stared down your boss, as he moved you to be behind him.

You heard your boss chuckle, “this is all just a big misunderstanding, (y/n) tell him,” your boss tilted himself trying to catch your eye.

“You tried to rape me,” you spoke just loud enough for your voice to be heard.

“You bitch,” your boss spat as he tried to charge at you. Jeno stopped him, taking your boss’ throat in his hand.

Jeno was a normally very strong person, that was accustomed to using his strength to get his way. You’ve had to remind him on multiple occasions about just how strong he was, considering that more than once he hurt Haechan worse than he initially thought. In this moment you didn’t want to remind Jeno about the damage he could do, as he lifted your boss like a paper weight. You could see his grip get tighter around your boss’ neck. As your boss began to turn a little too pale.

“Jeno,” you called out softly, “I want to go home please.”

Jeno would’ve killed your boss right then and there if you let him, but you didn’t. Instead Jeno dropped your boss on the floor, and turned to take you home.

My Duty As Princess

Chapter 3

Lee Jeno x fem reader

masterlist

in collaboration with@urlocaltrash28

preview,01,02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, epilogue

Genre:arranged marriage au! royalty au!

Warnings:none(?)

Word Count: 6.3K

Authors Note: Ahhhhh I finally did it correct and updated on a saturday lmaoooo. Also an updated WIP is coming out, I know I have behind on updating you guys but I will. hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

————–

With the wedding in a month, you and Jeno have become closer these past few weeks. Instead of just not liking each other at all, there was mutual respect. One could even argue that you and Jeno have become friends; you spent most of your mornings together, playing with Hades as much as possible. It seemed as if the mornings were the only time you guys got to yourselves, for the afternoons were full of meetings with different members of noble families, wedding arrangements, council meetings, and endless amounts of public appearances. Every day, there was a fifteen to twenty-minute appearance in the public to interact with the people.

Everything in Northcy was different from Modia. Back home, your family never had public appearances, you never had private meetings with the high houses, nor you didn’t have to attend council meetings. The list of new tasks seems to be never-ending. Fei and Mei became distant, they always silently did the work no longer stopping to whisper little gossip they heard to you. Chan and Hyunjin started acting like guards as well, not conversing unless you spoke first, obeying all orders without much argument. You were constantly surrounded by people but felt more alone than ever.

One morning, you woke up feeling your heart drop into your stomach. Your head was spinning and you felt as if you had to double over to throw up. Swallowing the nausea, you got up to begin the day. With the wedding approaching so soon there was no way you could have a sick day now. Finding the will of God himself, you put on the mask and prepare to embark on your day. That morning you had breakfast with the ladies of the council, all the wives of lords and their daughters. The last of the noble families were to be arriving today for breakfast and were planning on staying for the entirety of the month up until the new year. Thankfully, most of the ladies didn’t focus on your presence, mostly occupied with pleasing the queen in any way, whether that be complimenting her outfit, or by marveling at the decor of the palace. Few did pay attention to you, like Lady Qian. She was the wife to Prince Qian Kun, who was second in line to the throne of Varpol. Prince Qian Kun was in Northcy for the wedding as well as a royal ambassador for Varpol. Lady Qian made sure she introduced herself to you personally. She also said, “I hope my husband and your future husband stay in good fortune with each other, for the time to come.” She wanted to ensure that you made sure Jeno didn’t cut off the alliance with Varpol when he took the throne, is what you thought. Varpol was a small country that didn’t offer much to Northcy but asked for a lot in return.

Lord Huang Renjun was the same age as Jeno. It was tragic, his father died at war. According to your lessons, Lord Huang, Renjun’s father, controlled the air fleet; he was flying into enemy territory when they took fire and his plane was shot down. Just as Renjun was going into war, the terms of the union were agreed upon. Lady Huang gave you a confused look, she was angry because you were the enemy, you killed her father-in-law. However, you being here saved Renjun from that fate, so she eventually decided to be grateful for you.

Lady Park was older, but couldn’t be much older than your own mother. The way she carried herself told you that she did this rodeo, one too many times. There was another girl with her, she looked to be about your age, maybe a year or two younger. Her face, figure, her hair, everything about this girl seemed all too familiar to you. She was thin, with a nice tanned complexion, her hair long straight and raven-colored. She was everything you wanted to look like. Then it hit you, this was the girl in the picture that was on Jeno’s desk. The Noble Park family is the most powerful noble family after, of course, royal relatives like the Na noble family. The Park Family controlled the power plants throughout the country; they literally lit the country. The family consisted of Lord Park, Lady Park, their son Park Jisung, and their daughter Park Jisoo. There was a rumor that Jeno and Jisoo had dated for a few years, but no one spoke of how or when it ended.

“Princess (Y/n), pleased to make your acquaintance,” Lady Park spoke to you as she bowed. You put on the mask your parents had constructed; your face held no emotion but pleased. “I am Lady Park Jihyo and this is my daughter, Park Jisoo,” Lady Park said, gesturing to her daughter as she did a small bow as well. Jisoo was furious to bow to you. It was clear to anyone paying attention, the fire behind her eyes lit.

“It is very nice to meet the two of you,” you said, standing straight, refusing to bow to them. Normally, and most likely under different circumstances you would bow, but this is different, you have to show them that you will not become a pushover of a queen.

“It must be very lonely to be away from home without a single familiar face,” Lady Park said, trying to jab at any wounds. The mask you put on refused to break and show the lonely feelings that were festering inside.

“Sometimes, but the queen and her family have done nothing but make me feel welcomed here,” you said. You had to present the front that you and the royal family were united.

“That’s good, I hope you are also pleasing the prince as well,” Lady Park said, reaching for something that wasn’t there. “If you ever need to know what the prince likes, Jisoo here is well versed, I’m sure she could help.” You were wrong. Lady Park wasn’t reaching for your feelings for Jeno, but your feelings of incompetence. Lady Park knew that royals didn’t like the feeling of needing help from anyone, and that’s exactly what she made you feel.

“Thank you for such a gracious offer, Lady Park,” you refused to allow the mask to crack, “but I’m sure I won’t be needing that anytime soon, the prince and I are very happy.” You’ve done it, you put Lady Park and her daughter in their place, but most definitely not for long. The short exchange left you more exhausted than ever, but now was no time for naps. You and the queen had to see to the arrival of the last family member: Jeno’s grandmother, the former queen of Northcy, a rumored fighter pilot in the war, Queen Lee Hye-Young.

-

You, Grandmother Na, Queen Jaeyeon, King Donghae, Jeno, Haechan, and Mark all waited in the main foyer for Queen Lee Hye-Young to arrive. After what seemed like hours of waiting, but was probably only a few minutes, a servant announced the arrival. Everyone fixing their attire and standing straight, Jeno’s parents stood in the front, the king and then the queen, Grandmother Na slightly behind on the queen’s left. Jeno, Mark, and Haechan are behind Grandmother Na, and you on Jeno’s right, slightly behind. The doors opened, revealing Queen Lee Hye-Young. She was a thin woman. Her face had natural signs of age, there was no indication that she ever tried to alter her appearance. Her hair was cut short, a simple bob that rested just below her ears. She wore light makeup, almost as if it were nonexistent. Her outfit consisted of a royal blue satin tea-length dress with silver two-inch heels. She didn’t carry a handbag, wore only a huge pear cut sapphire ring, her wedding ring, a simple string of pearls, and a silver braided tiara that didn’t hold any jewels. Her presence alone commanded attention. She was stunning, absolutely stunning. You could only dream to age as nicely as she did.

“Mother,” King Donghae spoke first, grabbing your attention, he opened his arms to welcome her into a hug. She seemed so small compared to him. “How was the trip?”

“Fine. It was just fine,” Queen Hye-Young said. Even her voice was elegant, she was memorizing in every aspect.

“Welcome home, Your Majesty,” Queen Jaeyeon spoke, bowing to Queen Hye-Young.

“Thank you, my dear. I see you have not aged since I last saw you.” What sounded like a nice compliment was actually a jab at Queen Jaeyeon spending all her time on her appearance and nothing of importance.

“I see time has not made you kind, Hye-Young,” Grandmother Na spoke to Queen Hye-young. You were taken aback by Grandmother Na’s bold words.

“Hello, old friend,” Queen Hye-Young said with a smirk painting itself across her lips, she pulled Grandmother Na in an embrace, and the two shared a small fit of giggles. “Let me see my grandsons,” Queen Hye-Young said, pulling away from Grandmother Na, allowing her to pass through to see Mark, Haechan, and Jeno. Queen Hye-Young pulled each boy into a hug, whispering something different to each of them. “Where is my boy, Taeyong?”

“He’s working, Grandma. He’ll be back for the union,” Haechan answered.

“You best not be working him too hard, Donghae.”

“Of course not, mother.”

“And who is this?” Queen Hye-Young asked, slightly pushing Jeno aside to get a better look at you. She stared you up and down.

“This is Princess (Y/n) of the Modia Kingdom,” Jeno answered, stepping to your side, placing a hand on the small of your back. “She is my fiance.”

“Ah, so this is the princess,” Queen Hye-Young looked at you once more, “it is a pleasure to meet you, princess,” she said bowing to you.

“The pleasure is all mine, Your Majesty,” you said a little too quickly, bowing a little too low, absolutely flustered that Queen Hye-Young bowed to you. Queen Hye-Young’s lip twitched a little watching you, your fluster was all too evident, and she seemed to enjoy it.

-

You were set to have lunch with the Ladies of the council once again, but as soon as you made your way to the queen’s private dining area, you were called away. You had no idea where you were going and were just told to follow the maid. She led you to a french door that you assumed led into a private chamber. The maid knocked on the door and then opened them walking in, you followed.

“Princess (Y/n), as you requested, Your Majesty,” the maid said. As she moved to leave the room, you saw Queen Hye-Young and Grandmother Na sitting, eating lunch.

“Thank you, you may close the door on your way out,” she spoke to the maid. The maid bowed and did exactly as Queen Hye-Young instructed. “Sit, dear,” you sat. “How are you this morning?”

“I am just fine, Your Majesty.”

“Do you plan to take up a consort after the coronation?” Queen Hye-Young asked, getting straight to the point; there was no beating around the bush.

“Excuse me?”

“Are you planning to undermine my grandson during every decision he makes?” Queen Hye-Young continued to eat her breakfast like she was asking about the weather.

“Huh?” You were at an utter loss for words, not knowing how to answer any of her questions.

“Do you plan on making this marriage work, or is this just business? Will we have to fight for you to produce an heir?” Your stomach did flips, palms sweating. You wanted nothing more but to leave. “Are you planning on cutting off Northcy’s alliances with smaller kingdoms? Will you open the palace up for the people to see? Are you ready to manage the budget of our kingdom?” Your head started to spin and wondered when you last ate. You were so busy that you barely felt as if you had time to consume food. “Do you intend on allowing Jeno to have a courtesan? Will you take on one as well? I heard a rumor about a little guard in your favor.” There was a ringing in your ears, Queen Hye-Young’s voice sounded far away. “Do you plan to uphold our family’s traditions? Or will it be only your family traditions from now on?”

You felt your eyes flutter close, only wanting to blink, but couldn’t pry them back open.

-

I was sitting for lunch with Jaemin, Haechan, and Mark, taking a simple half-hour to rest before being stuck in meetings with various Lords.

“Jeno, hello. You there?” Haechan called out, grabbing my attention.

“I’m sorry, what?” was all I could manage. Haechan, Mark, and Jaemin just laughed and shook their heads, going back to whatever conversation they were having before. I waved down a maid for a new glass of water. All I wanted to do was lay in bed, but I barely had a moment to myself. I wonder how the princess feels right now, and what she’s doing.

“Crown Prince Lee Jeno,” a maid called out, standing enough distance away to be respectful. All of our heads turned to face her. “Queen Hye-Young has requested your presence.”

“Very well,” is all I could muster to say, as I stood to follow the maid. I waved back a bye to the guys sitting at the table. Ever since Jaemin arrived, the three of them are always together just like before. I wonder if the princess’ maids are doing alright here. I looked at the maid that I followed. I didn’t see much of Fei or Mei. We made our way up to the second floor, where the chambers were. She said she was going to be having lunch there with Grandma Na.

As we approached her doors, people were running in and out. “Call a doctor,” Grandma Lee yelled out, her military voice suited. She was running past the maid to the bedroom. Did Grandmother Na get hurt? I ran into the room, there Grandmother Na sat on the floor, the princess’ head in her lap. Grandma Lee was checking her pulse. Maids were coming in with supplies for the princess to be comfortable.

“Where’s the doctor?” The question came out as a whisper, quickly drowned out by my grandma’s shouts. My body went numb for a second, so many haunting memories fighting even harder to cloud my consciousness. I never thought I’d see the day where the snippets of my life that I pushed so far back into my mind were exploding back in front of my eyes.

“Excuse me, Your Highness?” a maid asked.

“Where’s the doctor?!” I yelled, rushing towards the princess’ side, pulling her out of Grandmother Na’s lap and towards myself. “Have the doctor meet me at her chambers, she shouldn’t be left on the floor,” I said, gaining control over my voice again, picking the princess up and all but spiriting towards her chambers.

Finally making it to her room, I laid her on the bed. She was looking up at me. “Princess, are you alright?”

“I’m alr-”

“Don’t lie,” I cut her off, my tone more rough than intended. The princess has this habit of telling people what they want to hear.

“My head hurts and I feel nauseous,” the princess sighs. Now she’s actually telling the truth.

“The doctor should be here soon, princess.” As if my words were magic, the doctor walks in. Most would’ve gone to a hospital, but we royals tried to maintain public appearance whenever it was humanly possible.

I stood in the back of the room against a wall, while the doctor did his examination. I knew Grandma Lee and Grandmother Na were right outside the doors because they were quick to follow me when I moved the princess. Looking at the princess, I realize she’s thinner than when she first arrived at the palace. I felt guilt pile in my stomach, my mind taking me back to when I was fifteen, peering down at the frail body of a girl far too young to be hungry, cold, and helpless. I couldn’t save Jia, but did I miss the opportunity to help (Y/n)? Was this my fault?

“Your Highness,” the doctor addressed me, “the princess is alright, she fainted, my guess is from a lack of food and an increased amount of stress. She needs to rest and eat good food.” The doctor’s words confused and worried me: ‘lack of food.’

“Thank you, doctor.” The doctor left, leaving me, the princess, and her maids. “Leave us, please.” The maids looked to the princess, who nodded in approval. The princess sat up on the bed, she was trying to stand up. “Hey, hey,” I said, walking towards the princess, pushing her to sit back down, “the doctor said you needed to rest.”

“Jeno, please. I have things I need to do, I can’t spend all day in bed.”

“Yes you can, even if I have to stay here and watch you,” I said, rubbing my temples, “you haven’t been eating?”

“I have, I-” she started, not knowing how to continue. There was a knock at the door, a perfect interruption for her. Grandma Lee and Grandmother Na were there, standing in the doorway.

“May we come in?” Grandma Lee asked. I looked at the princess who nodded her consent.

“Come in,” I said.

“Are you alright, dear?” Grandmother Na asked, rushing to the princess’ side. She sat on the bed next to the princess, rubbing her arms. Grandmother Na always had a warmer personality than Grandma Lee.

“I am just fine, thank you,” The princess was calm, she wasn’t afraid to be in my grandma’s presence.

“Princess,” Grandma Lee started, she was distant, almost sorry, “I didn’t mean to-”

“Your Majesty, this is not your fault,” the princess cut off Grandma Lee, “I don’t have answers for your questions right now, but I will before long. I plan to work with the prince and be a queen that my and your people deserve.”

Grandma Lee smiled and nodded. I looked between the two. Grandma Lee turned to me and nodded. She approved, that’s what she was telling me, she approved of my union.

-

Neither you nor Jeno was able to have a proper lunch, so he requested food be brought to your chambers and you guys would dine together. Fei and Mei both carried a tray of food each. They set them on the table before you and Jeno. It was chicken noodle soup with rice. You smiled as you looked at the tray. It was a dish your mother made whenever you felt sick.

“Thank you,” you said to Fei and Mei as they exited your room. You brought up a spoonful of soup to your lips, the warm liquid danced across your tongue and ran down your throat. The burn felt magnificent, and you couldn’t help but eat like you have been starved for a lifetime.

“Good?” Jeno asked, looking at you, he mindlessly mixed the soup with his spoon.

“Perfect.”

As Jeno continued to watch you eat, he thought about what made you so special to get Grandma Lee’s approval. Jisoo never received Grandma’s approval, even though she spent years trying to earn it. You only personally knew Grandma for less than a day and you already earned her approval. What made you so special?

“Are you not gonna eat?” you asked, looking at Jeno’s bowl.

“Do you want some more?” Jeno asked, looking at your now-empty bowl. You gave a small nod. Jeno just smiled at you and handed his bowl over. He just continued to watch you eat. It was incredible how you looked absolutely stunning even while eating.

“It’s rude to stare,” you said, looking up from your bowl, meeting Jeno’s eye.

“It’s not rude to admire, though,” Jeno said with a smirk. You smiled at Jeno’s comment, feeling a small heat bloom on your cheeks.

Jeno spent the rest of the day with you, waiting on you hand and foot, refusing to leave. Something about ‘you’re not gonna rest if no one is watching you.’ He did leave you for a few minutes to get Hades from his room, but he made sure Fei and Mei knew that you weren’t allowed to leave until he got back. The only time Jeno allowed you to do anything by yourself was when you had to go to the bathroom. Snacks and drinks were constantly being brought up to the room, per Jeno’s request. He needed to make sure you were more than okay. He couldn’t let another person he cared about leave him through tragedy.

Finally, it was time for the evening meal. All the Noble families were at the palace for the holidays, as well as the wedding. Evening meals have become a feast; everyone sat on one long table, with King Donghae sitting at the head, Queen Jaeyeon on his right, Jeno on his left. Your seat was always next to Jeno, for any event, and if he wasn’t there, then you sat next to Queen Jaeyeon.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Jeno leaned over to whisper to you while you guys were eating the main course.

“What I do every day,” you said in a hushed voice, loud enough to him while you continued to eat, “follow your mother around.”

“Spare your morning for me,” Jeno whispered, “let’s go on a date.”

Red crept up your neck to your cheeks and the tips of your ears. You can’t deny that after spending the few weeks taking care of Hades with the prince, he was definitely more than just a pretty face, but your feelings were more complicated. “What do you hope to achieve with this?” You asked, putting on the mask.

“Princess, I know you don’t have feelings for me, but there’s no reason not to try,” Jeno said, turning, looking directly at you.

“Alright, your highness, a date tomorrow morning,” you said looking at Jeno. This is gonna make things more complicated.

-

I was set to meet the Princess at 9 am. At 8:51 am, I was in front of the princess’s chambers.

“Chan, correct?” I asked, looking at one of the guards posted outside of the princess’ chambers.

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“And Hyu…?” I couldn’t quite remember the rest of his name.

“Hyunjin, Your Highness,” the other guard responded.

“Right, my apologies,” I said to be polite. “Chan…”

“Yes, Your Highness,” he looked stoic with his response, almost awkward with the interaction.

“I know you and the princess are more than just friends,” I started. I knew. I knew from the moment I first saw the princess with her guard. I knew but I denied it, and now no more.

“Your highness, I have no-” I raised my hand, stopping Chan from speaking further.

“I want to try a relationship with the princess.” It looked like his heart stopped, all color draining from his face. “I trust you won’t interfere, but I ask that you be there for the princess should I fail.”

“Your Highness, I don’t understand.” He looked confused.

“I will have to marry the princess no matter what, but should our relationship not work, I will insist that you remain in Northcy for her,” I hoped that my voice remained calm, “this will be away from any family and friends you have in Modia, will that be alright?”

The princess is gonna lose so much, the least I can do is try to make it somewhat bearable. “That will be, Your Highness,” he looked pleased, almost understanding what I asked of him.

“I know this isn’t easy, but I thank you,” I bowed my head to him. It takes a lot to give up the girl you love. I know that feeling well.

I knocked on the door at three to nine. This will be the first time I ever knocked to enter her chambers. Mei opened the door and bowed as she let me enter. I told the princess that we would go into the city this morning. I want to take her to this one cafe called Norts.

Inside, the princess sat at her table drinking a cup of tea. She wore a black turtleneck, with an amber leather skirt and black stockings. There was a long, gray winter coat on the other seat. “Good morning, Your Highness,” she said as she got up from her seat, there I saw the pendant she wore, it was a crown. Thinking about it now, the princess had the title to wear a crown or tiara, but she never did. The most she ever wore was a metal jeweled headband, and that was only for evening meals.

“Good morning, princess. Beautiful necklace,” I said, holding my hand out to her. She placed her hand in mine, grabbing her coat.

“Thank you, it was a gift from my mother,” she said as we exited her chambers, “a subtle way to let people know you’re royalty.” Her voice is as lovely as ever.

“Why?” Was all I could manage, hoping it was enough to encourage her to talk more.

“Mother didn’t want us to be flamboyant; she didn’t want us to flaunt our titles,” she smiled to herself, looking down. We walked down the steps to the main floor, “she thought we shouldn’t act better than everyone, even if we are.” As she finished, she giggled, hand covering her mouth.

“Is your mother always so humble?”

“Actually, quite frankly, no,” she laughed, hand still placed over her mouth, “my mother truly believes we are better than everyone. She just refuses to act like she is.” Her laugh died down a little but was still there. God, her laugh. We were towards the front entrance, my own guards standing by the door.

Once we made it out the door, my car was there, and our guards were behind us. I stepped out in front of the princess, opening the car door for her. “Princess,” I gestured to the passenger seat of the car.

“You’re driving, your highness?” Her voice sounded pleasantly surprised, “don’t you get chauffeured around?” This time, she was teasing.

“For formal events, yes, but this is just me and you.”

She smiled, finally getting into the car. I let out a breath, I can’t recall the last time I actually went on a date. My guards were in the car upfront, her guards in a car behind us. I got into the driver’s seat, started the car.

“May we listen to music?” She looked at me, her eyes were soft, almost doe-like.

“Put on whatever you want, princess,” I handed her my phone, opening it for her first.

“What kind of music do you like?” She scrolled through the options of songs.

“Put on your music, princess,” I glanced at her.

She smiled while looking down at my phone. She put on ‘war with heaven’ by Keshi. She leaned back, smiled, and closed her eyes for a minute.

“Do you know how to drive, princess?”

“I do,” she’s hesitant.

“And?”

“My parents have forbidden me from driving,” she giggles a little to herself. This must be a story.

“Why do they forbid you?”

“I was driving over the speed limit, but it wasn’t really by much. It was only,” she bit her lip, “sxtver…”

“Princess, speak up,” I said, glancing at her, red creeping up her cheeks again.

“I was driving,” she let out a breath, “60 over.”

“60 over?! How fast were you going?!” The shock was clearly evident on my face. Why in the world would she be going 60 over?

“I was doing 160kph (100 mph),” she looked down to her shoes, “well when the officer caught me, it was 160.”

“Why would you be going that fast?” I asked, sliding my hand down my face.

“Racing,” she stated so calmly.

“Racing?” I looked at her again. She gave me a small, timid smile.

“I was different in Modia,” she looked out the window. We were entering the city.

“Different how?” The cafe was only another 2-3 minutes away.

“I had no responsibilities, I wasn’t the heir and was the third daughter,” she looked to be deep in thought, “I was allowed to be a child.”

“And?”

“And so, I went out,” she smiled to herself, “car meets were my favorite. Chan would sneak me out, and I would ride with him, the passenger in his car. He and his friends were big, they were racers, and I was his passenger.” The smile is still on her face. We pulled up to the cafe.

“And you became a racer?” I asked while parking my car.

“I did,” I got out after her answer, rushing around to open the door for her. My guards were already up ahead by the entrance of the cafe, her guards stayed by our side.

“Maybe you should drive back,” I said, opening the door to her. She giggles at my suggestion.

“You wanna experience a police chase?” She questioned.

“Maybe,” we walked arm in arm together into the cafe. They sat us more towards the back, her guards took a table up at the front of the cafe, watching the entrance, and mine took one closer to us. Not close enough to hear us, though. “Did you at least win when you got caught?”

“Of course, I won,” she smirked, as she sat, “have you ever been to a meet?”

“I have not, cars are Jaemin’s thing. I enjoy cars, but not as much as him.”

“Your thing?”

The waiter brought us some water and menus.

“Music.”

She raised her eyebrows.

“I enjoy playing the guitar and biking.”

“I wanted to learn how to play,” she looked at the menu, “but never had the patience. What do you usually get?”

“I usually get something more healthy like egg whites, but I think I’m gonna get something like waffles,” I looked at her. She was still staring down at the menu.

“I think I’m gonna get the french toast,” she put the menu down, taking a sip of her water, “it’s my favorite breakfast food.”

I put the menu down, looking at her, “you know I could teach you.”

“Huh?” Her face filled with confusion, eyes going wide. It was the most adorable look ever.

“The guitar, I could teach you.”

“Oh,” she looked down, fiddled with her finger for a second, “I would like that.” She looked at me and smiled. Her smile was only a half-smile, but by god, she was more beautiful than Aphrodite herself.

We continued our breakfast, talking about her life in Modia and about my hobbies. She was most definitely different in Modia, she lived a life that many of us aren’t allowed to live. I felt almost jealous, jealous of the life she got, the life that I wanted, but the look in her eyes made me feel guilty about those thoughts. Her eyes became glossy when she spoke of how she changed: when the third letter came. I didn’t have a right to be jealous, I didn’t lose what she lost.

We were in the car, on our way back to the palace, my guards in front, hers in back. “Care for a detour, princess?”

“Well I have the time,” she smirked at me, “your mother cleared my schedule for the morning when she found out about our date.”

“Okay then.” There were a few more streets before we left the city. I took a sharp right turn, down another street, stepping harder on the gas. She laughed, holding on to her seatbelt. Her guards were still on our tail. A left turn, a right, and then another right, and they were gone.

“Where are we going?” She was still smiling.

“It’s a surprise,” still speeding just by a little, we drove deeper into the city, past the café. I didn’t think I was gonna take her here, but I want a memory with her here.

“A museum?” She looked out the window at the building. I got out of the car, rushing to her side to open the door, holding my hand out for her to take. “It’s a music museum, commissioned by my grandfather, a gift.”

“Gift? For?” She looked at me with raised eyebrows.

“For me,” We walked into the door, arm in arm. The staff bowed at us, at me, “my grandfather died when I was four. He never saw the results.”

“I can’t believe you got a whole museum as a gift,” she smirked, teasing, “the best I ever got was a car.”

“Let me show you my favorite section,” we walked up the steps to the second level, into a back section, a small room that held a collection of all kinds of stuff. The princess let go of my arm and looked at the collection.

“Is there a theme here?” she looked at me confused, rightfully so.

“No,” I watched her look around, “these are my favorite pieces from everywhere.”

“So this is just your personal collection, within your personal museum,” she’s teasing again.

“It’s not my personal museum,” I stated.

“Right, it’s just a gift,” she smirked, looking back at the collection, fixated on a violin, “what’s the story behind this?”

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” I stepped next to her, looking at the violin with her, “it was mine.”

“Yours? You play?” She looked at me. I stared at the violin.

“I used to, I haven’t played in a while, I’m not sure if I even could anymore,” I looked at her. She held care in her eyes.

“You said,” she looked down, hesitant, “you said your grandfather, the late king… how did he know you were gonna be in music?”

“After his passing, the museum project was left to Grandma Lee. She decided it was gonna be a music museum when it finished,” I looked back at the violin, tilting my head, “she said that she saw it in my eyes: the love for music.”

“It’s a very large museum for just music,” she looked out into the doorway, peering into other sections.

“It holds every part of music,” I stood by her, looking at the museum, “every genre, every instrument, every part of music you could imagine.”

“Amazing,” she was in awe.

“Let me take you around the rest of the museum,” I grabbed her hand, leading her away and onto more of the museum.

We didn’t talk much as we walked and enjoyed the rest of the museum. Her smile never seemed to leave her face. Time stopped, it was only us, the two of us in this little world looking at old pianos, time never moving. If someone shot me right now, a bullet through my head, heart stopping, I would die a satisfied man. Satisfied that I got this opportunity to be in this moment, to be here, to be with her.

-

“Princess (Y/n),” Queen Jaeyeon yelled at you when she saw you running into the palace through the garage door, Jeno right behind you. “Crown Prince Lee Jeno,” Queen Jaeyeon’s face was red, “the two of you have missed meetings with lords, luncheon with your grandmas, and neither of you thought to tell me about a dog you allowed in my palace.”

You wished Queen Jaeyeon hadn’t yelled; her voice sounded so demanding, so chilling, it set more fear in you than anyone else who’s ever yelled at you. “I’m so-”

Jeno placed a hand on the small of your back, stopping you from apologizing, he took a step, standing right beside you.

“Mother, don’t overreact,” Jeno’s voice was calm, caring, “we took a detour, we’ve been in meetings with lords since their arrival, we can reschedule lunch with grandma, and the dog wasn’t in your section of the palace.” He smiled genuinely; it seemed to calm his mother a bit.

“That doesn’t negate the fact that a wild animal is in my palace, and the two of you ignored your duties!”

“I apologize, Your Majesty. Our detour took longer than we had anticipated, I will personally see to the Lord’s family, Grandma Lee, and Grandmother Na to apologize.” You wanted nothing more than to leave right now, you still had to meet with the priest of the wedding.

“Mother, isn’t that enough?” Jeno asked, hand still on your back.

“Don’t make me bring up the fact that the two of you also abandoned your guards, which should anything happen to either of you, could have led to yet another war,” Queen Jaeyeon was still very angry. Both you and Jeno looked down to your feet.

“I have rescheduled the meeting with the priest, and the two of you will be in attendance. For today, all of your prior engagements are canceled. I expect the two of you to be on time to dinner tonight.” Queen Jaeyeon turned away, Jeno started to laugh after she was far enough not to hear.

“That was fun,” Jeno sighed, calming down from his laughing fit.

“You nearly got me killed,” you look distressed, hitting Jeno’s chest, “no more damn detours,” you huffed, rubbing your temples, after giving Jeno a firm look.

“Understood, princess,” he looked at you, making direct eye contact, tilting his head a little to the right. You thought ‘damn he and Jaemin really are related.’

After getting scoldings from Queen Jaeyeon, Jeno walked you back to your chambers. Hades was inside waiting for you. Jeno left you to play with Hades by yourself, you missed enjoying him by yourself. Before long, it was time for the evening meal. Jeno met you at your chambers and walked you down to dinner. Chan and Hyunjin followed you as usual. Chan looked as if he was happy. It confused you.

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