So, Houlihan and Burns (but Houlihan especially) are extremely upset that Radar seems to be getting romantic with an officer, Louise Anderson. Even though they only saw them talking together at lunch? With Hawk and Trapper also present? It strains credibility a bit. If pressed, I’d say that what this show is missing is any real heat between Radar and Lt. Anderson, beyond his smitten first encounter with her when he carries her bag. By now (14 episodes into season 1) the show’s creators should know that we’re in this mainly for the sex. Louise has a flirty moment with Hawkeye in her tent which surpasses anything that ever goes on between her and Corporal O’Reilly—this is just unfair.
That said, Kelly Jean Peters is great as the intellectual object of Radar’s affection. She looks like someone from now, maybe an adjunct professor at a Midwestern grad school, as much as like a 1950s military nurse. (She doesn’t look like a ‘70s lady at all, strangely enough.) Though her tastes in music and literature force Radar to jump through cognitive hoops and ultimately bore him to sleep, she succeeds in taking his mind off his broken engagement. Pity she didn’t come back a few years later to give Winchester a try.
My favorite parts of the episode are at the front end, however, before Anderson has even appeared. We see what made Gary Burghoff such a sublime Charlie Brown, as he sulks in the mess hall and lies in fetal position listening to his sweetheart’s “Dear John” record. (I wish I knew who did the voice of Linda Sue.) The doctors put him through a battery of tests to find the cause of his sadness, and he’s funny throughout, sweetly patient with a subtle air of irritation.
The episode title is a reference to the film of the same name, which was huge at that moment and a hundred times sappier than MASH. We’ll take Radar’s love life over Ryan O’Neal’s. We’ll also take Hawk and Trapper having “pillow talk” in Margaret’s bed.
We’re all adjusting to the brave new world of the post-Radar era, of course, but the biggest emotional upset is BJ’s, as he drinks himself into an explosive rage, ending up in a puddle of tears. Klinger, too, has it tough, resenting Radar for having left him such a difficult new job. As a team, these two tear the camp and environs apart on their bender of self-pity. I hope I speak for the fandom when I say this is massively entertaining for all.
The series is overdue for another dose of BJ’s angst—this is one of several times when a stormy inner struggle bursts through the captain’s calm façade. It’s the only time he breaks down to this degree, however, writhing in a weepy mess on the floor of Col. Potter’s office with snot running into his mustache. He also smashes the original Swamp still into oblivion, and strikes Hawkeye in the face, giving him a black eye. BJ! Please get a grip! The cause of this bad behavior has been a letter from Peg, saying that Radar arrived in San Francisco safely and spent an enjoyable few hours with her and daughter Erin. Sounds horrifying. Not to razz Beej too much, what’s put him over the edge is that Erin mistook Radar for him, leading him to fear she has forgotten who her daddy is.
I’m happy to say everyone soon calms down, though first Max and BJ break Sherm’s liquor cabinet and make a funny dart board out of Radar’s face at Rosie’s. The level-headedness begins with Father Mulcahy, who sits down with Sherm and tells the tale of an old company clerk who was once just as hapless as Klinger. It was Radar, whipped into shape under Col. Blake’s wing. (Plausible? I’m not sure Henry ever had it in him to teach or discipline someone, nor that O’Reilly wasn’t—as Klinger called him—“a born clerk.” I’ll buy that Father in his wisdom is stretching the truth to make Sherm feel better.) Then, the two miscreants are found, gently counseled, and forgiven. The still even gets rebuilt.
References to Radar are the backbone of this episode, the first to air after his farewell—wrapping up with the forlorn teddy bear left in the Swamp. But it’s important to note that other departed characters get some play here as well. Potter mentions Henry Blake again in his pep talk to Klinger; Trapper is invoked during BJ’s long catharsis of jealousy. (Fittingly enough, no one has any regard for Frank Burns.) In other words, since MASH is again handling a transition, it makes sense to refer back to transitions in its past. When Klinger and BJ are soothed, the audience remembers too how hard it was to see some personnel go home.
Later, though, we learned to embrace others and love them dearly. Even if we stop short of calling them Daddy.
BJ Hunnicutt: BJ thinks long and hard about when to say “I love you” that first time. Probably overthinks it. He’ll want some romantic moment to come along that makes the moment just perfect, but knows that’s hardly likely. Still, he’ll hold off for longer than he probably should just looking for that perfect timing.
Francis Mulcahy: It’s a battle for him even knowing he loves you. So to say it takes some major thoughts about himself and you. Odds are someone else will probably tell you that he loves you before he gets around to making the decision to do so, but he’s happy that the pressure has been taken off of him when you tell him you know.
Hawkeye Pierce: Hawkeye is really a wildcard for this one. He could tell you he loves you the first time you meet, though in that case it may be a bit sarcastic. Or he could wait an excruciatingly long time to finally say it to you out loud for real.
Henry Blake: Henry can’t seem to find any time to tell you. He’ll try, but there’s usually endless interruptions, so he gets creative. He’ll have Radar come and fetch you as if on some official business and when you finally have a moment alone, he’ll finally get to say it.
Margaret Houlihan: It takes Margaret such a long time to say “I love you”. She feels like admitting it is a weakness. And, while she does feel it, she often keeps her feelings close to her chest so as not to come off as soft.
Maxwell Klinger: The moment Klinger realizes you get him like no one else does, that’s the exact moment those three little words fall from his lips the first time. Not a lot of people really understand him so to have that just cements his adoration of you.
Radar O'Reilly: Radar probably says it too fast. It just comes pouring out of his mouth one time when he’s nervously rambling to you and he’d want to take it back immediately, until you stop him and tell him you love him too.
I love the characterization of Radar, I mean, “this character can see the future sometimes, but it doesn’t really matter” that’s just the most hilarious thing
