#relationship rules

Relationship anatomy

(Series of questions which can be useful when facing issues inside a relationship of any kind. Taken from a discussion with the Woebot app’s AI)

1) What are the advantages of blaming the other?

2) What are the disadvantages of blaming the other?

3) How much would I rate the advantages and disadvantages I found? (say, on a scale from 0 to 10, with 10 meaning it’s a very strong advantage/disadvantage)

4) What’s a negative thought I have about the relationship?

5) What is my role in the relationship? What type of person am I in it?

6) What adjectives describe my role in the relationship? (at least three adjectives, if possible)

7) What is the other’s role?

8) What type of words would I use to describe them?

9) What does it feel like for me to be in this relationship?

10) What are the “Rules” of the relationship that connect the two “roles” and reflect them both?

11) Do the rules and roles accurately reflect the interactions in the relationship?

12) Is it similar to other relationships in my life or specific to this one?

13) Looking through rules and roles, do I feel differently about the relationship or the same? If I feel different, this difference has had a positive or negative effect on how I think about the relationship?

14) Do I feel motivated to change elements of my relationship? If I am, can I pinpoint directly the changes I want to implement?

15) Overall how do I feel now? Better, the same or worse?