#renjun angst
[7:14PM] a big smile was plastered on renjun’s face, jogging slightly so she could have a chance to catch him. and eventually, she did. the couple laughed out loud, his hands snaking around her waist as she wraps her arms around his neck.
“i love you, so much.” the brown haired boy spoke. eyes full of love while staring into her eyes. “i love you too, injun.” she responded, slowly starting to lean in so she could press her lips against his.
i smiled, feeling happy that he was able to move on. but deep inside, i could feel my heart slowly ache as i watched my lover with another girl. if only i survived, this would’ve been me instead of her.
although, it’s fine. as long as he’s happy with her. i no longer have to see the love of my life cry over my death over and over again. today marks as his 21st birthday. it also means that he’ll finally spend his birthday somewhere else other than my grave.
as they hold each other’s hand and began to walk away, i watched my other half become whole again with another.
a/n: aaaa im sorry for writing so much angst lately (〒﹏〒) i can’t help it heuheuehe but i promise to write fluff afterwards!! no!more!sad!stories! but anyways,, this was completely inspired by a tiktok vid i came across while i was scrolling :]
Love To Hate Me
part four – pussy cat
sorry for not posting for so long omg i feel so bad for making yall wait but im backk for nowww :) also tysm for 50+ fllwrs it really means a lot (/^-^(^ ^*)/
taglist:@daegalfangirl@marklexleaf@bbnana@ikyk-leeknow (dm/ask me if you wanna be added in the taglist!! :D)
couldn’t tag for some reason </3: @ne0yong
Love To Hate Me
part one – facebook mom
honestly idk i feel like this is gonna flop but whatever just to clarify: the last text is from jaemin’s pov!! not yn
Love To Hate Me - Na Jaemin !in progress! [ON HIATUS.]
genre: social media!au,, highschool!au,, enemies-to-friends -to-lovers,, big fluff,, a bit of angst
pairings: na jaemin x fem!yn,, mark x fem!yn (a bit of noren)
warnings: cussing,, jaemin’s a bit mean (yea i think that’s all lol)
a/n: wowow i just wanted to start my own social media au for fun since ive been pretty interested in them for the past few days.. i hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as i love to make it!! ❤️
more coming soon..
[2/3] introduction:
y/n’s crew: completed. √ next up, jaemin’s crew:
Love To Hate Me
jaemin’s crew: uncompleted.
[ 12:32am ]
neighbor!renjun is sending signals to you from his window again, a beaming circle from his flashlight bypassing the fabric of your curtains.
at the sight of it, you scramble to your window and draw the curtains open. with his flashlight in his other hand, he’s holding up his large notebook with the words “I CAN’T SLEEP” scribbled onto it in big, black letters.
you smile, reach for your own notebook, write down “WHY NOT?” and hold it up for him to see. he takes a moment and squints his eyes to read your question. then, he’s writing again.
“BORED!” he holds up, with a proud smile on his face.
you scoff at the silly reason and put your notebook down. at this, renjun knows that you’re about to open up your window so you can talk to him, and mimics your action with his window.
“why couldn’t you just text me?” you call out to him. he shrugs. “doesn’t this feel so much cooler?”
well, you can’t really disagree with him.
as the midnight air wafts through your bedroom and you converse with the cute boy next door, you can’t help but have this tingly feeling inside your heart. it doesn’t help that renjun was looking especially good tonight, with his messy dark brown hair and black pajama shirt.
“well we have school in like 7 hours, so you should probably fix that!”
the boy shakes his head in disapproval. “OR… you can stay up with me and we will suffer tomorrow together.”
although you feign reluctance, both of you know that this was inevitable—you’re far too whipped for him to reject him of basically anything.
and just like that, you’re climbing into his window while he turns his nintendo switch on. you’re hit with the familiar smell of renjun, the fruity scent of his shampoo swirling all over your body.
“i’m gonna hate myself for this,” you grumble as you plop yourself next to him. truthfully, you already do. your head is spinning from his nice scent and this close proximity. if you’re trying to get over him, this was not doing you any favors.
from your peripherals you can see renjun smile to himself, making your heart ache. “nobody forced you to,” he teasingly argues.
“ok shut up,” you scowl as he hands you your remote. as complicated as it sounds, you know that he knows that you’re completely smitten by him. did you ever actually confess to him? of course not. has this ever been acknowledged between you two? not at all.
yet somehow, he just KNOWS and somehow you know that he knows. the both of you tiptoe around the subject, although sometimes he gets bold about it just to see you flustered.
with a light blush across your cheeks and a fluttering in your chest every few minutes, you play Mario Kart with the boy of your dreams until the sun rises. when it’s time for you to go back, he follows you on your way to his windowsill.
“let’s do this again?” he shyly suggests, and you ravel in how it’s now HIS turn to avoid eye contact and get all blushy.
“maybe,” you respond, which is enough for you to go back the next night, and the next.
our last farewell
pairings: huang renjun x fem!reader
genre/s:angst
details/warnings:royal au; death, heavy angst
word count:0.6k
a/n:first renjun fic? yeah wow
—
The weather is dull, though smells petrichor since it had stopped raining not much prior. The sky comes off shallow, dressed in an overwhelming gloom. The stars appear bewitching as representatives of every lie whispered in the ballroom.
The violin’s notes jump up and down, allowing a melody out of agony to rhyme. There is something indignant and anguished behind the way the musicians play. From how they move the violins’ bow to the way their fingers delicately dance on the piano’s keys.
Though it seems, something else lays beneath that. You’re not exactly sure what, but there is an unfamiliar tension. Almost too unfamiliar that it somehow gives out a feeling of familiarity.
You stand well executed between the many faces who surround your figure. A burgundy gown is what you’re wrapped in. The top stays fitted as the skirt falls loose. The puffy sleeves sit exquisite on your shoulders, showing off the minimal tattoo inked on your collarbone.
Your eyes fall onto a familiar man as it seems as though he is making his way towards you.
“One more dance?” You mildly ask, extending your hand for the servant to refill the wine glass standing in between your fingers.
“One last dance.” Renjun corrects, rather humorless in comparison to your silky manner as his hand grabs yours. You drop the glass onto a stand, ignoring the not-so-mellifluous sound it creates.
“Ah, how fun to be a liar.” You respond, not allowing the smile displaying on your features to disappear.
“I guess that makes the two of us.” He states, tone breathy as you pretend to not comprehend; tilting your head slightly.
The Huang’s fingers gently touch the naked skin of your waist, where the dress parts in a sensual curve. Your bodies sway accordingly, exactly on rhythm with the violins. Renjun spins you around gently, but you might as well have been whipped around the room.
You feel your heart beat faster. Thunder, even. But, of course, you will never admit to that.
“Why so crucial, my love?” Is what slips past your lips minutes after. Gently, tanunteringly, maddeningly.
Renjun takes a second. Then two, then three, and then-
Shoot.
A loud shot is heard crystal clear by everyone inside that ballroom. Everyone- no. At that moment, everything stops. Not exactly coherent whether the world stops for everyone, or if it’s just the heart of your world that stops functioning.
Renjun’s body instantly attempts to fall onto the ground. Though, your hands wrap around him, preventing his figure from coming in contact with the floor.
Your body feels denser, your heart feels heavier as you drop onto your knees. Tears commence to escape your eyes, though you fail to realize.
It starts with a single drop, then just seconds after, you have a whole river falling from your eyes.
Continuations of multiple “no’s” and “forgive me’s” are the only sets of letters you find yourself being able to put together as Renjun’s brittle body stays unconscious on your lap.
The ballroom becomes filled with distressing sirens, high pitched screams and sounds of footsteps belonging to bodies eager to leave. Everything sounds so loud, so obnoxious.
But you hear nothing. Nothing until you feel his body getting taken away from your lap. You cry, scream, shout. None works. Nothing works and before you know, you’re back on your knees. Left with nothing but tears and bittersweet memories.
The noxious night stays silent and the moon wraps itselfin immorality. Unspoken feelings, unanswered questions and an incomplete journey is what lies beneath your heart as you ask yourself who will flourish the dreams he left behind…
- pairing: son of athena!renjun x daughter of aphrodite!reader
- genre: fluff, angst
- word count: 6.6k
- author’s note: it’s finally here, the first fic in demigods: electric boogaloo! it feels so nostalgic to return to this pairing because i haven’t written them in so long i really hope you guys enjoy it you also might notice that i am including the member’s perspective a lot more than i did in the previous series. i wanted to try something different with the sequels since i rarely ever include perspective shifts in my fics because i find it easier to write with one distinctive voice. please let me know your thoughts <3333
- warning(s): depressive behavior
- additional: this fic is a sequel. catch up on the original series here!
Someone is knocking on the door.
You’re not sure if it’s because you have been sitting in your bed, wrapped in 3 layers of blankets while shrouded in total darkness for an extended period of time, and your senses have suddenly become heightened because of it, but you recognize who it is by the way he knocks.
It’s Huang Renjun, your wonderful boyfriend and the sole reason why you haven’t completely morphed into one of those single-cell microorganisms that feed on bacteria in the deep, dark trenches of the ocean.
His knocking style is very much like his personality—three raps, short and sweet, but consistent. If Renjun is anything, he is consistent. He’s been consistently in love with you since you met him almost 5 years ago, patiently waiting for you to look his way, and he’s consistent now as he patiently waits for you to allow him to shoulder the weight of your grief alongside you.
Even though some of your other siblings have come by and checked on you, Renjun’s knocking is the only thing that clears your hazy mind for even a moment. You’ve lost all concept of day and night at this point, but even in your stupor, your brain hangs onto every little detail of Renjun.
Does that sound stalkerish? Perhaps.
Are you actually a stalker? Debatable.
“Just a second,” you call out, voice sounding like you have the worst pneumonia of your life. Hurriedly grabbing the cold spoons you’ve been keeping on your nightstand, you place them against your swollen eyes. It’s a depuffing trick that you normally use when you’ve eaten too many salty foods at night, but now they serve as tools to help you hide the fact that you’ve been crying.
After a couple more seconds, you finally say, “Okay, you can come in now.”
The door clicks open and Renjun walks in, holding a tray of food.
“You know, your room is technically going to qualify as a biohazard if you don’t let in some fresh air soon.”
Renjun always tries to crack a joke when he checks in on you, a valiant effort to make you smile. You’re not sure what your expression has been as of late, but you hope you’ve managed to squeeze out something that resembles a smile for him at least once.
With deftness, he navigates through the pitch black of your room and easily makes his way to your bedside, switching on the lamp on your nightstand.
Your corneas feel like they’ve just been lit on fire when he does it, forcing you to squint as your eyes slowly adjust, but you don’t miss the grimace on Renjun’s face when he is finally able to take a good look at you. His stormy gray eyes go over every little detail of your features, and his hand slowly reaches up to cradle your cheek. He gently runs this thumb across the still-swollen bags under your eyes.
He knows you’ve been crying. He always does. After all, you’ve never once been able to fool him when it comes to your heart.
Your eyelids flutter shut as you lean into his hand, wanting his touch to shield you from everything bad in the world.
Renjun, however, furrows his brow and turns his attention to yet another tray of untouched food that he had brought for you on your nightstand.
“You have to eat something, Y/N. Please. Even just a bite,” he whispers softly, taking a seat on the edge of your bed and nudging the new tray of food towards you. “Look, I even took out all the carrots from your curry.”
It isn’t that you’re choosing not to eat. In fact, you’re quite hungry. It’s just that every time you try to put food in your mouth, your insides twist and turn like a taut band being wrung out and it makes you feel sick to your stomach. Whether you’re sick from heartache or betrayal or anger or guilt or a mixture of all of them or something completely different, you’ll never know.
When you don’t react to the curry, Renjun picks up the small bowl of chocolate ice cream from the tray before scooping up a spoonful and attempting to feed you.
“They’re serving your favorite chocolate ice cream too,” he adds, obviously trying to entice you into wanting it by waving it in your face and letting the scent waft over to you.
You can tell how hard Renjun is trying; he always carefully picks out all of your favorites whenever he brings you food, and this time is no different. That’s why you feel so bad every time he has to take back a full tray, and you see his face grow haggard with worry. It upsets you even more that all of this is affecting his well being as well.
So you slowly lean forward, wanting to ease his stress in any way you can, and gingerly take a bite of the ice cream. Perhaps because it’s not a solid food and it quickly melts on your tongue or because Renjun is the one feeding you, but it doesn’t make you feel awful. Rather, the ice cream’s cool temperature and decadent chocolate flavor is a nice reprieve of the constant taste of drainage and bile in your throat.
When you glance back up at Renjun, he looks so relieved that he could cry at any moment. His gray eyes glimmer like crystalline starlight, and he gazes at you with so much love in his eyes. It constantly astounds you that he looks at you the way he does, as if you’re something so precious.
Especially now.
You don’t even want to think about what kind of state your appearance is in, but you’re certain it isn’t anything short of ghastly.
For the past two weeks, you’ve seldom left your bed, only getting up to use the bathroom and doing a bare-bones hygiene routine that keeps you just clean enough so you don’t start to collect grime. You most definitely have not washed your hair during this time, and you can imagine it’s just an oil slick up there.
(Renjun had mentioned a while ago about doing an oil slick painting, so maybe this will serve as inspiration for him.)
You’re wearing one of Renjun’s t-shirts as well, which you’ve lovingly deemed your comfort shirt. It’s a faded spirit tee from his high school days that he normally wears when he’s working with messy art supplies, so it has dried splatters of paint here and there. You don’t mind though; it smells like acrylic paint and Huang Renjun, a mixture that you didn’t realize would be so calming to you.
And like one of those mangled baby blankets that toddlers drag around and scream for when someone tries to take it away to wash it, this t-shirt has metaphorically and literally absorbed all of your pain (snot and tears).
So, in conclusion, you’ve looked better.
But Renjun doesn’t even seem to notice. Rather, he looks at you like you’re at your most beautiful. He always looks at you like that but particularly so now, when you feel the least beautiful, like an exhausted explorer that finally found his treasure at the end of a long journey. No, even more priceless than treasure. He looks at you as if you’re the half-human, half-god incarnate of his very heart and soul—the divine blood that courses through his veins.
You wonder what you did in your past life to deserve someone like him. And you hope in your next life, if you’re lucky, he’ll love you again.
“Do the airplane,” you whisper, a small smile tugging on your lips. You want to tease him, to let him know you’re okay. You’ll always be okay as long as he’s by your side.
He raises an eyebrow, trying to feign skepticism, but you can see how delighted he is that you’re slowly starting to cheer up. “The what?”
“You know, like ‘here comes the airplane…nyooom,’” you explain, waving your arm around and mimicking what parents do when they’re trying to feed their kid.
“How old are you?” He rolls his eyes.
“I just want to see how much I can get away with since you’re being extra nice to me,” you admit sheepishly.
“I’m always nice to you,” he scoffs.
Yes, he is. From the moment you’ve met him. Too nice, if you think about it. You would argue that he could actually be meaner.
And because he is so kind, despite his complaints, Renjun indulges you per usual.
“Here comes the F-16 fighter jet,” he begins, snaking his arm back and forth swiftly as he makes noises that attempt to resemble an engine revving up, but if the engine had popcorn lung.
Right before the spoon reaches your mouth, you catch his wrist and move it aside before leaning forward and giving him a quick peck on the lips.
“I love you,” you say softly after you pull back. You’ve told him many times before, and you could say it until your tongue fell out but it still wouldn’t be enough to encapsulate just how deeply you love him.
Renjun slowly blinks, the spoon threatening to slip from his grasp; every time you tell him you love him, he reacts like he can’t believe you said it. Like this is all a dream that’s too good to be true.
When he finally manages to convince himself that this is real and you, in fact, do love him, he sets everything aside and wraps an arm around your waist as he tries to pull you into his lap so he can kiss you silly. However, you quickly cover your mouth, refusing to make out with him while you’re in this state.
“I’m disgusting right now. In an extremely desperate need of a shower,” you whine, shaking your head.
He doesn’t really seem to care because he perches you on his lap anyways, kissing the back of your hand that’s over your mouth. You wonder if he’s aware of how much your self-control is clinging on for dear life when you feel his soft lips against your hand. He doesn’t push any further though, just opting to rest his forehead against your collarbone and his palms on your thighs as his thumbs rub soothing circles against your skin.
At first, you think he’s doing it to comfort you, but then you realize that he’s actually just fidgeting because there’s something on his mind. Ever the loud thinker, you don’t even need to see Renjun’s face to know that he’s probably got his brows furrowed and his poor lip gnashed between his teeth as he contemplates with that big, Athenian brain of his.
You card your hands through his coarse hair, guiding him away from your chest and tilting his face up towards you so you can look into his lovely gray eyes. Sure enough, they’re clouded with conflict as the gears in his head churn.
“Are you gonna tell me what’s wrong or will I have to seduce it out of you?” you tease.
Renjun doesn’t react to your joke, instead gently lifting you from his lap and setting you beside him on the bed. You search his expression, much more concerned than before, nervously waiting for him to speak. His hands come up to firmly grasp your arms, as if he’s trying to physically hold you together.
“Jaehyun wants to see you.”
And perhaps it’s good that he’s holding you, because you feel your blood run cold as you slump into Renjun’s arms.
Jeong Jaehyun, the child of Aphrodite, resident heartbreaker, your brother, and now—
Traitor.
The reason why the Aphrodite Cabin has basically ceased to function at this point and why you’ve been trapped in this depressive spiral for weeks.
You’re honestly still not 100% clear on what exactly happened because you simply couldn’t bear to listen to it, but you know enough. You know that Jaehyun was the one who stole the Golden Fleece, the magical artifact that protects Camp Half-Blood’s borders. You know that Jaehyun wanted to use the Golden Fleece to resurrect Kronos, King of the Titans and sworn enemy of the Olympians. You know that Jaehyun was the one responsible for the disastrous Capture the Flag game, wherein monsters with enhanced strength (thanks to the stolen Golden Fleece) were unleashed upon the campers and injured almost everyone—leaving you with a broken arm and Renjun having nearly been killed, had his sister, the head counselor of the Athena Cabin, and her boyfriend not saved him.
You know that you can never forgive Jaehyun.
“He’s been asking for you for a while now,” Renjun continues slowly, “but I just…I didn’t want to tell you until you were…better.”
“I have nothing to say to him,” you force out, trying to swallow the lump in your throat.
Renjun doesn’t respond, just wrapping his arms around you and pressing you against his chest, your cheek squished into his shoulder.
“Okay,” he whispers.
The two of you stay like that for a while, relishing in each other’s company as he holds you.
Your mind whirrs as you think about Jaehyun, and all of the memories you’ve had with him flash by—the countless times he’s called you ‘kid,’ the constant teasing, the knuckle sandwiches, the training. If it weren’t for Jaehyun, you might not have even realized your feelings for Renjun.
“You’re so sharp when it comes to other people, but you’re dense as hell when it comes to yourself,” he had said.
He was such a big part of your life, your family, and you owed so much to him. You’re not sure if you can just cut him out like this, not without some sort of closure.
Sighing, you finally say, “But I should, shouldn’t I?”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Renjun responds.
“But I think I want to,” you begrudgingly admit, leaning back from the hug so you can look at him.
Renjun smiles. “I know.”
“Will you come with me?” you ask, threading your fingers through his.
“I’d go with you to Tartarus if you asked me to,” he answers immediately, brushing your mussed hair aside so he can place a kiss on your forehead.
You wrap your arms around his neck, throwing yourself on him and clinging to him again like a koala. He slightly grunts at the impact, tucking your head right underneath his chin and kissing the crown of your head.
A few seconds pass by before he says, “You could use a shower though.”
You playfully shove him away, rolling your eyes.
“You are so not cute, Huang Renjun.”
A long, long piping hot shower later, you’re armed with another sweater of Renjun’s to serve as your armor and Renjun himself by your side—ready to face Jaehyun once and for all.
Since Camp Half-Blood has no jail or dungeon per se, Jaehyun has been kept under tight supervision in the Hades Cabin, under the watchful eye of the Hades kids while Mr. D and Chiron, the heads of the camp, consult the Olympians on stripping Jaehyun of his powers and expelling him from the camp to live as a normal human.
Your friend Cat, a Hades kid, and her brother, Sicheng, are waiting for you outside as you approach the Hades Cabin. You and Cat became close when you decided she was going to be your next matchmaking project, even setting her up with Jaehyun ironically enough.
(If you were in a joking mood, you would’ve teased that this was not the enemies-to-lovers arc that you had hoped for.)
Ultimately, things didn’t work out and the two of you just bonded over your shared interest in sticking your noses into other people’s love lives.
Cat was actually the one who broke the news to you that Jaehyun was the traitor. In fact, she and Sicheng were on the team of demigods that discovered and captured him in the Sea of Monsters, where he had been hiding out. You were grateful that she told you first, instead of letting you find out through an official announcement via Mr. D and Chiron.
When you see the Hades siblings, you grip Renjun’s hand tighter and unconsciously begin to drag your feet. You wish you could walk up confidently with your head held high, tell Cat that you’re ready to rip Jeong Jaehyun a new one, but your stomach feels like it’s about to rip you a new one.
“Y/N!” Cat waves before rushing over to you and giving you a hug. “How are you feeling?”
“Like I want to hurl,” you answer honestly.
She pats your shoulder sympathetically.
“How are you?” you ask, trying to make small talk so you can delay going inside.
“Miserable,” Cat groans. “I don’t understand why we had to give up our cabin for that loser. I’ve been on nightwatch, so I’ve barely gotten any sleep. But they are letting me stay in the Artemis Cabin for the time being since the Hunters aren’t here, and it’s the most gorgeous cabin ever.”
Since Artemis is a virgin goddess, she has no children. However, she does have a legion of maidens that have sworn loyalty to her, known as Hunters of Artemis. They remain single for their entire lives, rejecting any kind of romantic love, which in turn grants them eternal youth and pseudo-immortality as long as they keep their vows and are not killed in battle. The Artemis Cabin is largely unoccupied during the summer, since the Hunters are traveling most of the time, and no one else is allowed in unless there are special circumstances. Therefore, the interior of the cabin remains a mystery to most of the campers.
If this were any other situation, you’d be pressing Cat for more details, but you’re barely registering her words.
“Where’s your sister?” you continue absentmindedly, looking around.
“She got called into Mr. D and Chiron’s office. I’m not sure why. She’ll tell us when she’s back,” Cat explains breezily, not bothered by your lack of reaction to her other answer.
“I see,” you squeak, “How’s Sicheng?”
“Insufferable.” Cat rolls her eyes. “He got himself a girlfriend and now he doesn’t want to do his job anymore. He’s the biggest fool for Moon, and it was cute at first, but now he keeps trying to ditch me to hang out with her in the Poseidon Cabin.”
“Hey!” Sicheng protests, still within an earshot.
That sufficiently peaks your interest and distracts you from your anxiousness, as you are unable to completely shed your matchmaking ways. You lean forward, eyebrows raised.
“Sicheng got a girlfriend? And I didn’t know about it?” you gasp.
Now that you’re paying attention, you’re not sure how you missed it. As an Aphrodite kid, you can sense it when someone is in love, and Sicheng is exuding it. His aura is so strong that you’re surprised it hasn’t physically manifested itself in the form of a pink cloud that follows him everywhere.
“Oh, honey bee,” Cat sighs, “you’ve missed somuch.”
“Well, aren’t you gonna catch me up—”
You feel someone squeeze your hand gently. Turning, you see Renjun, who had been quietly waiting for you to finish your conversation. There’s a knowing expression on his face, and you hate that he’s aware of exactly what you’re doing.
“You’re stalling,” he points out.
“Party pooper,” Cat retorts, though she seems to understand too. Winking, she glances towards the Hades Cabin. “If Jeong Jaehyun tries anything, just let me know and I’ll skewer him. Now, go get ‘em, girl.”
You smile at her appreciatively before looking back at Renjun, who is still holding your hand. When you gaze into those cool gray eyes of his, you suddenly feel a lot braver. He gives you a small nod, encouraging you to walk inside.
Taking in a deep breath, you march up the dark stairs of the porch and fearlessly push open the door. Like everything else about the Hades Cabin, the inside is dark, low-lit with torches that are sparsely littered around the room. The entire structure is made of pure obsidian, and there are no windows. Camp Half-Blood doesn’t have a prison, but you imagine the Hades Cabin is pretty similar. It’s a far cry from the bright and pastel Aphrodite Cabin that you’re used to, and you suppose Jaehyun feels the same way.
Speaking of Jaehyun, as much as you don’t want to, he’s sitting in the middle of the room, chained to a chair that appears to be made out of Stygian iron. Stygian iron is a magic metal that is forged from the Underworld and cooled in the River Styx, limiting its wielders to only children of Hades. It’s able to absorb the essence of practically every mythical being, including demigods.
The chains that are binding him emit a faint golden glow, which indicate that it’s Celestial Bronze. Celestial Bronze is what most of the weapons wielded by demigods are made out of. It’s mined in Mount Olympus, and unlike Stygian iron, Celestial Bronze affects mythical creatures physically rather than absorbing their spiritual essence.
Jaehyun himself looks awful as well. His hair is dull and flat against his forehead. There are deep bags underneath his eyes. His face is ashen, cheeks hollowed out. Despite the fact that his body is rippled with muscle, he looks like a skeleton. As if he’s slowly deteriorating. Dying.
It both breaks your heart and terrifies you to see him in this state and being held under such maximum security, making you confront the reality of just how dangerous your brother has become.
Brother.
But he’s not really, not anymore.
“Hey, kid.”
You inhale sharply through your nose, every microfiber of your body screaming at you to turn around and run. Renjun, sensing the spike in your nerves, places a hand on the small of your back—a wordless gesture of comfort, letting you know that he’s right behind you.
“Please don’t call me that,” you respond, trying to hide the quiver in your voice.
“Sorry,” Jaehyun chuckles, a low, sickly rumble that dies inside his chest, “force of habit.”
He drags his eyes away from you and to Renjun, an amused smirk on his lips. “Hey, Renjun.”
Renjun doesn’t respond, just narrowing his eyes. The hand against your back grows firmer.
“Are you Y/N’s chaperone?”
“Why did you want to see me?” you interrupt, moving to shield Renjun from him with your body.
He casually leans back against his chair, comfortable, like he’s in his own living room. Ignoring your question completely, he asks, “How have you been?”
“Peachy,” you lie.
“And the others?” he asks, referring to your siblings. “How are things at the cabin?”
“Wonderful. Nothing but smooth sailing. Barely even noticed you were gone,” you say petulantly.
Jaehyun smiles. “That’s good. I was worried about—”
“Did you call me here to waste my time?” you demand.
“No,” he answers, looking surprisingly genuine. “I wanted to apologize. To my brothers and sisters, but to you especially, Y/N. You were the last person I wanted to hurt.”
If you weren’t so incredulous, you would laugh in his face. “You should’ve thought of that when you nearly massacred the entire camp, when you nearly killedRenjun—”
Your voice cracks when you say his name, tears involuntarily welling up in your eyes.
“I want you to know that everything I did was for my family—”
You bark out a bitter laugh. “Stop. We’re not your family. We stopped being your family when you tried to slaughter us all.”
“I’ll always be your brother.”
Even though this Jaehyun is unrecognizable to you, one look into his eyes and you can tell that he truly believes that. That, in his own delusional way, he does care about you. However, one look into his eyes, and you know that he isn’t your brother. His eyes are void of any humanity, just two vortexes of nothingness.
A shell.
You think about Jaehyun, your brother, and how he smiled. How he laughed. How he joked. How he got frustrated. How he cried. How he lived.
“No,” you say softly, not even noticing that you’re speaking aloud, “you’re not Jaehyun.”
“No,” he whispers after a moment, seemingly coming to the realization himself. “I suppose I’m not. The Jaehyun you knew was weak. He cared, and it’s a weakness that I continue to carry with me.”
You’re not sure what to say to that. Were you supposed to be grateful?
“I came here to say goodbye to my brother, but it looks like he’s already left,” you state flatly, “So, I have nothing else to say to you.”
You turn to Renjun, nodding and allowing him to see the finality in your gaze. He keeps his expression neutral, but you can see how proudly his eyes beam at you.
“Wait,” Jaehyun calls out.
An enormous wave of dread washes over you.
“I want to speak to Renjun too. Alone.”
This is probably bad timing, but Renjun thinks your alarmed face is unreasonably adorable.
You’re staring up at him with wide, watery doe eyes and your expression is a fix of horror and fury as you process what Jaehyun just said. Renjun doesn’t even have time to utter a word before you’re marching straight up to Jaehyun, despite the fact that you were ready to bolt just a few minutes ago, and grabbing him by the collar like a stereotypical thug in a corny 90’s movie.
Again, bad timing, but it’s really cute.
“What kind of mind games are you trying to play?” you hiss, shaking Jaehyun. “You’re insane if you think I’m going to let you—”
“It’s not up to you, is it?” Jaehyun replies smoothly, completely unfazed.
You’ve never been a particularly violent person, but Renjun sees serious consideration of murder flash in your eyes, and he lunges forward to pull you away from Jaehyun in order to keep you from doing something you’ll regret.
He lifts you with one arm, twisting you away and shielding your vision of Jaehyun with his body. And because you’re stubborn and hotheaded (he loves you for it), you try to thrash out of his hold.
“Look at me,” Renjun says sternly, cupping your face with his hands. He waits until your expression is visibly relaxed before continuing, “It’s okay. I’ll speak with him.”
“But—”
“Go outside and chat with Cat. Get the gossip about Sicheng and Moon. I’ll be right out,” he continues gently.
“Renjun, you don’t understand. He’s going to—”
“Use his charmspeak on me,” he finishes your sentence. “I know.”
Charmspeak is an ability that allows the user to compel others to do their bidding with their voice, a power that only Aphrodite children are able to have. However, not all Aphrodite children have this ability, and even the select few that do are able to use it to drastically varying degrees of success. For example, you’re able to use charmspeak if you really put your mind to it, but you rarely do because you don’t like the way it makes you feel. Jeong Jaehyun, on the other hand, is the most powerful user at Camp Half-Blood.
Renjun saw the challenge in Jaehyun’s eyes the moment the two of you walked in.
Maybe he’s stubborn and hotheaded too, but he isn’t going to give Jaehyun the satisfaction of thinking he ran away. Just like you, Renjun is going to face him and his charmspeak head on.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine,” Renjun says, lacing his fingers through yours before placing a reassuring kiss to your knuckles.
“How can I not,” you mutter, but he can see that you’re relenting. “Please be careful.”
“I always am.”
You give him a pointed look before reluctantly trudging out of the cabin, glancing back at him one more time before shutting the door behind you.
Renjun swears that the air chills by ten degrees when they’re finally alone. The silence hangs heavily in the air as he turns back to Jaehyun.
“Afraid?” Jaehyun quirks an eyebrow.
“I am admittedly afraid of many things, but you are not one of them,” Renjun responds calmly.
He laughs. “Then I suppose you wouldn’t mind answering a few questions. Truthfully, please.”
Ah, there it is.
It feels like a fog is slowly settling over Renjun’s brain, and the sliver of rationality he has left is informing him that he’s becoming under the influence of Jaehyun’s charmspeak. His body starts to grow numb, like he’s floating. His eyes become misty and blurry, and he can’t see the expression on Jaehyun’s face anymore.
“Okay,” Renjun agrees. His voice sounds muffled, as if he’s underwater.
“Great. We’ll start with something easy,” Jaehyun suggests, “When did you fall in love with Y/N?”
He blinks at the unexpected question. Even in his daze, Renjun was bracing for something much more sinister.
“What? Did you think I was going to turn you into my evil minion or something?” Jaehyun laughs again, seemingly reading his mind.
“You can try your damn best,” he shoots back. Jaehyun’s charmspeak isn’t so overpowering that Renjun can’t still respond with his usual quips, and he’s pretty sure Jaehyun is keeping his control loose on purpose.
“Relax, I won’t,” Jaehyun asserts, “I just want to have an honest conversation with you.”
A conversation in which he has to use charmspeak on Renjun in order to pry answers out of him.
“I’ve been in love with her since we met,” Renjun finally responds. He would normally stop there, but he feels compelled to continue. Of course, that would be because of Jaehyun’s handiwork.
“I was enamored from the very start, when she barrelled into the Arts and Craft Center without a care in the world—more stunning than any goddess, with a smile so lovely that it would make any nymph green with jealousy. I had never seen anyone like her. She was like…a prophecy. Like a beautiful, fleeting prophecy that could slip through my fingers at any moment. A prophecy that someone like me could never dream of understanding, even if I spent the rest of my life chasing after it. From the moment I laid eyes on her, half of my soul belonged to her.”
He can’t really make out the expression on Jaehyun’s face, but the latter stays silent. A few moments pass before he speaks again, “What do you like about her?”
Renjun wants to laugh. Where does he even start?
“I don’t think there’s a thing I don’t like about her,” he chuckles. “I like the way her eyes sparkle when she’s up to no good. I like that she has to be in everyone’s business. I like how she has a short fuse and how cartoonishly her face puffs up when she’s mad. I like the way her nose crinkles when she sees carrots in her curry. I like the little skip in her step when she walks. I like how she bounces when she’s trying to contain her excitement. I like when she laughs so hard that she has to hold onto my arm to keep from falling backwards. I like that she loves so deeply, even towards people that don’t deserve it. I like that she lets herself feel things, even though she knows it’ll be painful sometimes. I like that she frustrates me to the point of wanting to scream at the top of Mount Olympus, and I like that only she can do that. I like that when she kisses me, I think about how I want to spend the rest of my life with her.”
Gods, Renjun didn’t realize how much of a sap he is. And of all people, he’s being forced to pour out his deepest, darkest feelings to Jaehyun.
“That sounds like a proposal,” Jaehyun teases. “Are you going to marry her?”
“Only if she wants to get married.”
“Do you have a ring?”
“No, I was…I was going to make it myself out of Adamantine,” Renjun explains, wishing that he wouldn’t. Adamantine, another precious metal that demigods typically use for weapons, is typically described as a mix between silver and diamond. “Since I gave her a painting when we first met, I thought it’d be nice to propose to her with something that I made as well.”
“You must really love her, huh,” Jaehyun states quietly.
“Is that even a question?” Renjun snaps, “I would do anything for her.”
“Hm,” Jaehyun muses, “would you admit that aliens don’t exist for her?”
Out of all the questions he’s asked so far, this is the one that makes Renjun hesitate the most.
“I wouldn’t have to because aliens are real,” Renjun says through gritted teeth.
“If she was being held over a volcano, and you had two options: admit aliens aren’t real or come up with evidence right then and there to save her life, what would you do?”
“Well, does this volcano have internet service or access to files from the Pentagon—”
“Answer the question, Renjun.”
“Yes,” he finally chokes out, “I would admit they didn’t exist. Or I’d just jump into the volcano myself.”
“You would die for her?” Jaehyun asks.
“Of course I would,” Renjun says immediately.
Jaehyun scoffs. “It’s easy to die for someone, so tell me this—”
Suddenly, Renjun feels an overwhelming amount of Jaehyun’s power wash over him. The relaxed hold that was over him before, allowing him to still have some semblance of free thought, has been ripped away. It’s as if the charmspeak has materialized into an invisible force that is physically holding him down, slowly crushing him and only promising to ease up if he answers the next question truthfully.
“Would you destroy the world for her?”
The whole world seems a bit like an exaggeration, but Renjun can feel that Jaehyun means it. The world, everyone he loves, Camp Half-Blood, would he destroy it all for you?
“Yes,” Renjun whispers, the answer slipping out with an ease that unsettles him to his core. An answer that has seemingly always been there. “If she asked me to. I would do it without hesitation.”
There is a long, dragged out silence.
But then, all at once, like he was being dragged out from the bottom of a deep, deep ocean, Renjun’s head clears instantly. The fog that lingered over his mind, the numbness of his body, the cloudiness that obscured his vision all disappear in a matter of seconds.
Renjun has never felt this disoriented, squeezing his eyes shut as he tries to recall what just happened—his conversation with Jaehyun already fading from his memory like a Polaroid developing in reverse. All he’s left with are his jumbled emotions and trembling hands.
When he looks at Jaehyun again, he’s astonished at what he sees.
Not a demigod, not a warrior, not a traitor.
Jaehyun, despite being imprisoned and chained, has never looked more human. There’s a light in his eyes that flicker, like the last wisps of a dying candle. He smiles, which makes his lips crack. It’s a haunting sight that Renjun doesn’t think he can ever forget.
An older brother, on his deathbed.
“Please take care of her.”
You throw yourself into Renjun’s arms the moment he stops out of the Hades Cabin. Burying your face into his shoulder, you cling onto him. He delves his hand into your hair, cradling your head against him as he inhales the smell of your shampoo. Your arms tighten around his torso.
“Are you okay?” you ask, voice muffled against his shirt. “He didn’t hurt you, right?”
“No, I’m fine. Are you okay?” He curls a finger underneath your chin and nudges your face upwards to look at him. He can tell by your bloodshot eyes and wobbly lip that you had cried and are currently fighting tears.
“Stop worrying about me,” you sniffle, “I’m asking you. What did he say to you?”
“Not much,” Renjun answers vaguely, “He just told me to take care of you.”
You laugh bitterly. “That’s rich, coming from him.”
Wrapping an arm around your shoulder, he turns you and starts guiding you toward the Dining Pavilion. “Probably his messed up way of acting like a protective older brother or something. Now, come on. I’m hungry.”
“Wha—you can’t just change the subject like that! I want to know exactly what he said to you!” you protest, though your feet subconsciously start walking.
“It truly was nothing,” he reiterates, “He really did just seem concerned about you.”
You start to sulk, and he has to fight to keep a straight face. However, it doesn’t last long because you start to get that twinkle in your eye.
“Sooo, did you, like, profess all the reasons you love me or something to prove that you’re worthy of being my boyfriend?” you ask, waggling your eyebrows.
“If I had anything to profess, then maybe I would’ve,” Renjun teases, rolling his eyes.
You gasp dramatically. “Huang Renjun, you are so not—”
He tugs your body flush against him, giving you the kiss that he had wanted to when the two of you were in your room earlier. He feels you smile against his lips as your arms come up to wrap themselves around his neck. When he pulls away, you give him another quick peck before bumping your nose against his, giggling.
He forgot to add that he loves it when the corners of your eyelids crinkle when you smile at him.
Renjun isn’t really sure if he’s doing the right thing by not telling you about Jaehyun’s last words and the way he looked. He just knows that it’ll shatter your heart in a way that you won’t ever be able to repair, and you’ll carry that guilt with you for the rest of your life. He doesn’t want you to remember Jeong Jaehyun as the fractured man he is, a hollow echo of what he once was.
He wants you to remember all of the happy moments.
So, when you look back, you remember your older brother Jaehyun.
He hopes that you’ll eventually be able to smile when you think of your brother rather than cry.
Renjun can only do that, hope and pray that you have nothing but happiness in your life because you, of all people, deserve that—
and maybe, if he’s lucky, you’ll allow him to dedicate his life to making you as happy as he can.
“Oh my gods!” you gasp, tugging on his arm so hard that his shoulder nearly hits you in the cheek. “Sooyoung’s girlfriend is Sana!”
Renjun blinks. “What?”
“Look over there!” you squeal, whipping out a pair of binoculars out of thin air. The pair that he’s pretty sure he tossed out already.
He glances over, seeing Sooyoung (daughter of Ares) and Sana (daughter of Iris) holding hands as they make their way to the Dining Pavilion as well. Turning back to you, he raises an eyebrow, saying, “You didn’t know?”
“What are you talking about? She said she wanted to keep it a secret back then!” you answer, confused.
“Yeah, but they were kind of obvious about it,” he says slowly, “They’re together allthe time. I thought you noticed.”
“Oh my gods,” you breathe, horrified, “First, I completely miss the whole love triangle situation with Moon and Sicheng. And now, I’m the last one to find out about Sooyoung and Sana. How have I fallen out of the loop so badly that even you know about couples before I do?”
Renjun opens his mouth to retort, but you continue speaking.
“That’s it. I have to get my groove back,” you declare, “It’s time that Camp Half-Blood’s official matchmaker makes her comeback.”
Without even waiting for his answer, you turn on your heel and march back to the Aphrodite Cabin, presumably to start drafting potential couples.
Renjun wonders if he’s allowed to be this happy.
RENJUN AND Y/N,
fin.
