137/365 - When it’s 3am but your brain decides that you have to do something fancy with your hair because you just do and it won’t let you sleep until you do.
if i wrote twilight there’d be a kid in edward’s class who Zones The Fuck Out and daydreams about a story they want to write, and edward would just tune in to watch like a tv show when he’s bored in class and he gets genuinely invested and eventually he’s like “i know EXACTLY how they can fix this plot hole that’s bothering them but how can i tell them that when they don’t KNOW i’m their first beta reader”
genuinely more compelling than literally everything else that happened in Twilight.
I know I’m not alone in wating to put on my bougiest winter fits and sip brandy eggnog next to a roaring fire with a party of my friends for the entire next week, but??? that’s not happening? Because people dont wanna wear a piece of fabric on their face? I mean… this is tragic… unspeakable… loathsome, even… abhorrently disrespectful to the universe and to me
just popping in to say hi :) adhd and uni are still kicking my asssjsbs but we move!!! i miss you guys so much ,, i’m gonna try and get back to posting soon just for myself because i miss writing and talking to you <33 hope you’re all doing well :)
a small warning first that this post is kinda sad/bittersweet so if you’re not up for that at the moment, maybe you should skip it. </3
a couple of things off the top:
> yes, I still ship Caryl (the real Caryl) justttttt as hard as I have since the day I found them. Nothing will derail me from the real Caryl. Nothing.
> yeah, I dostillthink Caryl are going to go canon on the show. (you read that right) but, well, there’s a but now.
i’ll explain myself more below the cut if you feel like it
you guys </3
first of all, I want to give everyone hugs because I know how sad you all are right now. all I can say is I am right there with you, believeeee me i am </3
before I go on with this post, I wanted to let you know that I think it’s come time that i’ll likely be deleting my blog. (gotta work myself up to actually click the button after all the blood sweat and tears i put into this thing but it’ll probably be the next few days ish. i just didn’t want to up and delete without letting you guys know first.)
a few things before I do…
a small disclaimer I should note first: I know very little about most stuff since season 7. I’ve been blocking it all because it makes me too sad. but I was told 3 things over the course of filming for season 9, so I know about the spoiler and I do know about the clip from Sunday night. (no I haven’t watched it and won’t watch it but I know of it)
so to reiterate what I said above, yeah, I stillthink caryl are going to go canon on the show. but I absolutely understand why everyone is upset because I totally agree that what they are currently putting out there undermines everything we have known and loved about Carol / Caryl since the beginning.
i do have a potential theory which I’ll share with you quickly but unfortunately, it doesn’t entirely make everything better. because if that stuff we appear to know is 100% what is going to happen, then it would almost render canon meaningless (for me at least)
anyway
In a sentence: I think this couldall be one big distraction before they hit you with whiplash and Caryl finally goes canon.
yes i know how unlikely that seems right now but don’t forget that misdirection is their M.O.
i have other reasons for thinking this, though. first we gotta go back and recall how they have been paralleling Rick with Carol since season 4. Like they have been taking these two leaders (with different ideas/methods about how to deal with things in a zombie apocalypse) down similar paths, if just presenting them with different challenges.
ok.
so keeping that in mind, back to the topic at hand - fast forward to season 6 for Rick. (does everyone remember J3ssie? everyone remember what happened in the episodes right before R!chonne turned canon? remember how fast it all happened? remember how they used Rick and J3ssie’s relationship to keep you focused one way only to have R!chonne canon the very next week? well I think it’s possible the same similar situation is about to happen to Carol/Caryl. even down to ez dying before Caryl happens. kinda like this will be Carol’s version of that arc in season 6 as it was for Rick then?
Sure,of course I could be wrong, Totally …i mean.. fuck… who even knows with this writing anymore but as I’ve said all along, all they ever seem to care about is shocking the audience. even for 2 seconds - no matter the cost elsewhere. they don’t seem to care how they sacrifice the characters (and therefore fans) in order to deliver the shock as long as you ‘don’t see it coming’. (heaven forbid)
not to mention the big “announcement” i was told about that they made on tv on Sunday is highly suspicious. Consider the source. whenever they push something, the opposite is true.
The problem is this, though; if everything we are hearing is the whole truth and nothing but the truth and we’re supposed to take everything at face value (and there is no trickery going on with the spoilers) then they ARE sacrificing Carol’s character. And imo, you just can’t write a beloved character as outof character as this, have her do these things that will now become a canon part of her story, only to sweep it aside and pretend everything is okay in the next breath, even if we were tolike what comesafter. It doesn’t work that way. it’s one of the reasons I left.
They may not care but we do. WE do care.
It’s not Caryl then. It’s not my Daryl. It certain as fuck is not my Carol and I would never accept this everrrrrr happening if they had stayed true to who Caryl really are to each other.
if you are able to overlook it, if you are able to ignore or not think too deeply about any of this, then I still think a canon Caryl scene is very possible. And if that makes you happy then I am so soo happy for you. Enjoy whatever you can. I won’t tell you how to feel about anything. You can decide for yourself.
but, for me, having canon transpire this way (forcing Carol in another “relationship” before allowing Caryl to happen, especially if it is only in the name of shock value) is possibly the most hollow and cruel way they could have done it. As if they have dangled a carrot in front of you for 9 years but when the time comes that you actually might finally be able to eat it, you realize it’s been nothing but .. a hologram of a carrot all along. If all true, I feel sad. I feel cheated. And I feel like all the time I spent (we all spent) was for people who actually don’t really appreciate our loyalty. kinda like they can do whatever they want to us as long as we like one part of it at the end, I guess? ….. no okay. Not for me. It all matters. The story matters. The characters matter. It all mattered. To me. To a lot of Carylers. It was never onllllyjust to see their lips physically touching. It was their beautifullllllllrelationship and the blossoming of that relationship as they were. not an OOC version. not characters who are barely even recognizable by the time it is made to happen and then sacrificed for what would essentially be a split second gasp from the audience.
so yes I still think Caryl are likely gonna happen
but i know i wouldn’t be able to watch it. not if this is the way they are making it happen. because, personally, I never would have wanted it this way.
Ok.
Having said this,
there are a fewglimmers of hope I can see where they might be able to explain it away. aside from the entire storyline being cut, ( like perhaps nothing is as it seems to be? perhaps there are things we don’t know here below the surface, like maybe Carol having some OTHER (currently unknown to anyone) reason for “getting — married” to this………. guy. Like maybe it turns out it’s all for appearances and that in reality the marriage isn’t what they’re trying to make you think it is atm. And that the real, smart, clever, strong, beautiful Carol is still inside and she has a reason for doing this completelyOOCthing at the direction of the writers and it’s just a matter time before being revealed to the audience) I want to believe that they thought it through fullybefore they wrote it (and didn’t throw Caryl under a bus)
One last thing about this;
I wanna remind everyone who we are dealing with. because one thing for fucking certain is that they are trolling with all of this. Again. (using a Caryl clip to get people to watch and then “announcing” another –ship? Come on. troll of all trolls) and it’s why I keep repeating the phrase “if all 100% true” because we know these showrunners, you guys. Take a step back. They know how to fuck with us. They relish in it. And I can tell you that my “they are fucking with you” detector has all its bells and whistles going off right now. so hopefully this is just another one of their annoying tricks. I really do hope it is.
unfortunately for me, I just can’t take anymore of these tricks :/
Right.
i think i’ve rambled sufficiently so I’ll go now but one last comment I want to make;
Please don’t let them take Caryl away from you.
No matter what. No matter fucking what. WE know who the real Caryl are. We know. Even if they don’t. Even if they are about to dismantle everything that made Caryl special to us. Don’t let them. Don’t let them take the real Caryl away from you. Don’t watch it. Go back to season 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 when they were still the REAL characters we actually knew and loved and remember our ship for who they truly are.
Remember them for who they were in this moment:
And this one:
And this one:
And this:
This is Caryl.
This is beautiful.
This is what meant the world to us.
(And I swear if I had enough money you guyssss, I would try to buy the rights for these two characters, get down on my knees, beg the actors to reprise their roles and tryyyy like ass to fix the fuckery. In a heartbeat.)
ok the tears are starting again so i’m going
love you guys and I’m sorry everyone is so sad right now. I’ll continue to hope that they wave a magic wand and make everything okay again because you deserved better than what it looks like right now </3
sorry I can’t do much to make you feel better (but i do have trust in my theyrefuckingwithyou detector. it’s been right before, hope it is this time <3)
Thank you again to everyoneforeverything.<3333
bye bye xx
p.s. if anyone wants to talk, you can reach me via email and I will talk to anyone who wants to talk. <3 xx
Oh. My. God. You can freely give Colin Morgan a 20 seconds scene with a full zoom on his face and you’ll be guaranteed he’ll tell a whole story with just that.
The “good night, son” - “sleep well, father” scene from the Last Dragonlord. The joy in Merlin’s eyes. The fact that he realizes he can say these words for the first time in his life. The rare moment when he feels whole, loved, like the hole in his heart has finally been filled. The hope that is sparkling in the corners of his eyes - for the future, for a life he could never have. My heart aches for him. I want to give him a blanket and take all his worries away.
pls this is my absolute favorite scene w colin morgan because you can see him MOUTH THE WORDS and then smile n cry a little because HE! HAS! NEVER! SAID! THOSE! WORDS! BEFORE!!! just the way an entire story and thought process plays out on his face without him having to say even a sentence. this man.
Reblogging for this addition bc TOTALLY
I’m rewatching this again, this is peak TV and Colin Morgan is a genius
