Once Zulius set foot — or rather, set hoof — in Cataur Valley, his life changed overnight. Upon arrival, the zebrataur was beyond nervous. This was his one chance to make a fresh start and show the world his potential, so it was only natural that his nerves were on edge. His previous failed attempt at the talent show kept flashing in his mind, but he did his best to shake the negative memories away. He had come too far to give up now; literally.
From the moment he performed his new and improved routine at Johnny Teatime’s Be Best Competition, he and the Glitter Cats were an instant sensation. Zulius put his heart and soul into his performance, every movement choreographed to a T and delivered with the elegance and finesse of an expert. His body was one with the music. It felt natural, almost like breathing. He had no doubt that really was what he was meant to do.
As soon as the music ended and Zulius struck his final pose, the large crowd of cataurs erupted into a deafening cheer. Zulius’ heart was going a mile a minute and he felt himself swell with joy as the seemingly never-ending applause rained down on him. Johnny Teatime himself, a tiny cataur with the largest eyes Zulius had ever seen, and whom he later learned was in fact a Shaman, descended from his perch atop his large ziggurat — a rather tacky-looking one, if he was being honest — to bestow upon him the hot-pink sash which was the prize of the Be Best Competition. His head was swimming with all the praise he was receiving. He just wished his mother was there to see him finally fulfill his lifelong dream.
Zulius and Samanthera were offered a residence in Cataur Valley, as long as the zebrataur continued to dazzle the cataurs with his performances in the Be Best Competition. Samanthera became Zulius’ publicist/agent, helping manage all aspects of his life and career. For a while, Zulius was on cloud nine, performing daily and basking on the adoration of his cataur fans. The love he received from the cataurs was unwavering. He quickly learned that cataurs were huge suck-ups, latching onto anything new and exciting and never letting go.
However, as happens with most repetitive tasks, the zebrataur found himself getting tired of the same old routine. Every day would be the same: get up, rehearse, perform, win, sign autographs, go to sleep. Not that he didn’t appreciate his current star status; far from it. He just couldn’t shake the feeling that he was wasting his potential by performing for the exact same crowd day in and day out.
That day began just like any other. Zulius was in the middle of giving himself a beauty treatment before his performance, lounging in his chaise longue with a moisturizing mask on his face and a slice of cucumber over each eye. His aromatherapy diffuser whispered sweet nothings and motivational phrases while he focused on his breathing. Alas, his moment of relaxation was abruptly interrupted by the sound of approaching footsteps against the marble floor.
“I just met with your personal trainer. Your workout session will have to be moved up for tomorrow.” Samanthera declared as she entered the room. “His niece is having her First Spell party and he promised he’d attend.”
“Tell him ‘no problem’ and ‘mazel tov’.” Zulius replied without a hint of enthusiasm before lifting one of the cucumber slices to look at his best friend. “Anything else?”
“Yes, I have your fan mail.” said the lemurtaur, pulling a large stack of letters from behind her.
“The price of fame is so steep.” he sighed dramatically, removing both cucumber slices from his eyes and taking the letters from Samanthera.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re getting sick of it.” she teased.
“Sick,me?! I have everything I could ask for! A thriving career, adoring fans… How could I ever get sick of this?”
He laughed at her statement — a little too loudly, if we’re being honest — as he tore open one of the envelopes and pulled out the letter, clearing his throat before he began reading it.
“‘Dear Zulius, you’re ameowzing.’ Like I haven’t heard that one before…” he deadpanned, rolling his eyes.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re a lousy liar?”
He glanced at the lemurtaur from the corner of his eye, noticing the knowing glare she was giving him. It screamed ‘you’re not fooling anyone, bub’.
“I’ll admit I’m not the best actor.” he sighed in defeat, setting the letters aside and sitting up. “And I wasn’t lying when I said I wasn’t sick of it. I love my life now! I’m a famous performer with a legion of fans, like I’ve always wanted! It’s just… I’m stuck in one place doing the same thing every day. I can’t help but wonder where else I could be performing, who else I could dazzle with my talent. I’m immensely grateful for this opportunity, but at the same time I can’t help but think ‘is this it?’”
“I understand, I really do. I could try looking for other talent competitions, maybe even book some shows for you around Centaurworld. In any case, I think you shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the life you have now. It’s like my nana always told me, ‘a birdtaur in the hand is worth two in the bush’.”
“I know, I know, I should be thankful for what I have, and I am.” Zulius said as he stood up and shrugged off his pink bathrobe. “But you can’t understand how jarring it is to perform for the same crowd every single day.”
“Yeah, but what can you do?” Samanthera replied as he sat at his vanity mirror and peeled off the moisturizing mask, examining his complexion from different angles. “A new opportunity isn’t just going to come blaring in out of nowhere.”
Almost as if on cue, a loud sound akin to a horn suddenly blared from outside. The walls around them shook as a result of the noise and Zulius nearly fell from his seat as he was startled. He and Samanthera looked out the window and saw an obscenely large golden-orange bus parked in the middle of the town square. Some cataurs had already approached the colossal vehicle to curiously inspect it and maybe even meet whomever was inside.
“I promise clairvoyance isn’t one of my magical abilities.” Samanthera commented without taking her eyes off the bus.
They immediately left their penthouse apartment to inspect what all the commotion was about. Once they reached the town square, the small crowd of cataurs that had gathered around the vehicle had already doubled in size. They could hear the cataurs whispering excitedly amongst each other as the door to the bus opened, dry ice mist wafting from its interior.
“Pshh, tacky.” Zulius muttered under his breath.
Once the mist dissipated, the centaur whom the bus belonged to sashayed out of the vehicle, striking a pose for the cataurs surrounding him. He was a heavyset tigertaur, apparently very full of himself. It didn’t help that the cataurs seemed to be mesmerized by this newcomer’s overconfident attitude, their eyes basically sparkling as they watched his every move.
“Greetings, Cataur Valley!” he said as he lifted an arm up towards the sky. “Feel free to bask in my glow.”
Despite the stranger’s egotistical statement, the cataurs began approaching him, releasing excited mewls as they neared the tigertaur. They had no idea who he was, but they already deemed him too interesting to ignore. He was new and exciting; the two criteria which cataurs valued the most. They were positively entranced by the newcomer.
Zulius, on the other hand, was petrified. His blood had frozen inside his veins as soon as he caught a glimpse of the tigertaur. Beads of sweat began pooling at his forehead and his eyes were about to pop out of his skull in disbelief.
“Sammy… for the love of all that’s good and holy, please tell me that’s not who I think it is.” he said almost breathlessly, pointing a shaking finger at the tigertaur.
“I wish I could.” Samanthera replied, sounding just as incredulous as him. “But I think it ishim.”
Zulius’ heart began to pound against his chest and his breathing almost stopped. There was no shred of doubt; the tigertaur who stood before him was none other than the one who had caused him nothing but pain during his childhood, who had sabotaged his first chance to perform in front of an audience and humiliated him in front of everyone he knew. Memories of that night began flashing in his mind, only adding to his steadily increasing anxiety.
He turned on his heels and began making his way through the growing crowd of cataurs as discreetly and quickly as possible. He had to get out of there before —
“Zulius Cheenerwitz, as I live and breathe!”
Flonk.
His heart sank and every muscle in his body became rigid. He could hear the tigertaur approach him, but he didn’t dare to turn around to face him. A million thoughts ran through his mind as he tried to perceive the best course of action. He briefly considered attempting to make a run for it and hope that wouldn’t look too unseemly, but he knew he was just fooling himself.
Accepting his defeat, he did his best to compose himself and face his foe, putting on the most neutral expression he could muster. The tigertaur was now a mere couple of feet away from him, his arms crossed over his bare chest and a mocking smirk peeking from under his bushy orange mustache.
“Splenjamin Dibbersen.” he sneered, placing his hands on his hips as he eyed him from head to toe. “You look… well fed.”
“That makes one of us.” the tigertaur retorted in a sardonic tone. “And I go by ‘Splendib’, now. All great performers deserve a stage name.”
“Oh wow, you took the first halves of your names and put them together? How original.” Zulius replied sarcastically.
They stared each other down for a while, the hatred they had towards one another radiating from their hardened gazes. Samanthera took a few steps back so as not to be caught in whatever was about to go down between them.
“If it’s a tussle you want, it’s a tussle you’re going to get.” Splendib threatened, his fur bristling as he spoke.
“Bring it on.” Zulius growled.
If the crowd of cataurs surrounding them was already enormous, it gained almost ridiculous proportions by that point. More and more cataurs gathered in the town square by the second, intent on watching the confrontation between the zebrataur they all knew and loved and the tigertaur whom they had no idea existed until just a few minutes ago.
“The seventies called, they want their hairstyle back.” Splendib began, pointing at Zulius’ mane. “Although, I do have to admit it does suit you quite well. It helps everyone see just how ugly you are.”
“Oooooohhhhh!” the cataurs hollered at Splendib’s diss.
“That’s some pretty big talk from someone who looks like he has a dead caterpillartaur stuck to his upper lip.” Zulius countered with a mischievous smirk.
“Oooooohhhhh!” the cataurs cheered once more, louder than before.
“At least I can grow facial hair.” Splendib replied as he ran a finger over his mustache to smooth it out. “I’m surprised you still have any hair at all, old man.”
As the cataurs released an almost deafeningly-loud enthusiastic cry, Zulius gasped loudly, feeling like Splendib’s words had stabbed him straight through his heart.
“Howdare you?! I’m in my twenties!”
“Yeah, 1920s!” Splendib retaliated.
The cataurs began laughing and Zulius felt himself become breathless. All of a sudden he was a child again, standing on stage covered in some smelly goo while everyone pointed and laughed at him. All it took was the laughter of his so-called fans to have him feeling as hopeless and defeated as he did ten years ago; and just like ten years ago, it was all thanks to Splenjamin.
“This isn’t over.” he muttered as he turned to leave, tears beginning to well up at the corner of his eyes.
As Zulius rushed out of the town square, Splendib couldn’t help but smirk victoriously. Samanthera, who up until that point had just been watching that entire altercation unfold, felt rage take over her body. She walked up to the tigertaur, her tiny hands balled into fists to keep herself from unwillingly causing harm to anyone that happened to stand in her way.
“You’re a real piece of work, you know?” she said menacingly, trying her best to look intimidating despite her reduced stature.
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Splendib purred as he ran a hand through his massive orange locks.
“You shouldn’t. That’s just a nice way for me to say that you’re a self-entitled piece of crap.”
The cataurs all gasped in unison and Splendib’s eyes widened, looking almost genuinely taken aback by that comment.
“You know, it’s really sad that you refuse to grow up. You’re still the same conniving, arrogant jackass you were all those years ago.” Samanthera continued, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring daggers at the tigertaur. “I’ll have you know Zulius has more talent in his little finger than you have in your entire body. And he’s made a big name for himself here, whether you like it or not. This time, there’s nothing you can do to ruin him.”
Samanthera turned on her heels and headed out under the prying gaze of both the large crowd of cataurs and the large tigertaur. The latter stroked his beard as he took the lemurtaur’s words in, his lips slowly curling in a smile.
“Is that so?”
——————————————————————————-
Zulius threw himself back onto his chaise longue, his entire body vibrating with pure anger and frustration. He wanted to scream his heart out, shout every single profanity in the dictionary at the heavens. He hated that Splenjamin — I’m sorry, Splendib — had this effect on him. He hated him. No matter what he did or where he went, he never seemed to be safe from the tigertaur’s torment. It was maddening! And where did he get off calling him old? He was only two months older than him!
Samanthera had tried to calm him with some words of encouragement, but he barely heard anything she said; it was like he had been rendered deaf by the rage boiling inside of him. He was quick to dismiss her, almost having to beg her to leave him alone for a few minutes as he tried to calm himself down. She conceded after much convincing, promising she would return in half an hour. As soon as she shut the door behind herself, Zulius pressed one of his lavender throw pillows over his face and screamed as loudly as his body allowed him. He was so busy yelling into the velvet fabric that he didn’t even hear the door open.
“Knock, knock!”
Fearing his enraged state was causing his ears to play tricks on him, he slowly moved the pillow away from his face. He scowled as soon as his gaze fell upon the tigertaur in his doorway and his suspicions were confirmed.
“Is this a bad time?” Splendib asked with an innocent tone.
“Foryou? Always.” Zulius hissed, gripping the pillow hard. “You have some nerve coming to my house after that little stunt you pulled back there.”
“I’ll admit that wasn’t my best performance.” the tigertaur commented as he made his way into the apartment, despite not having been invited in.
“Don’t even.” he narrowed his eyes. “What are you doing here, anyway? Is your life so boring that you need to follow me wherever I go just to make mine miserable?”
“You may not believe this, but my life doesn’t revolve entirely around you.” Splendib replied sarcastically as he observed the inside of Zulius’ abode. “I just so happen to be touring Centaurworld, going from town to town to perform my brilliant one-man show for all to see, and Cataur Valley was my next stop. I certainly had no idea you had moved here, let alone become such a hit here.”
Zulius’ ears perked up and his rage softened, albeit just just a tiny bit. That was the closest thing to a compliment he had ever heard from the tigertaur.
“Oh, you… know about that?” he inquired, his expression turning quizzical.
“How could I not? There’s posters with your face everywhere!”
“Right…” Zulius murmured, a tad embarrassed.
“You really did make quite a name for yourself, haven’t you?” Splendib asked as he took a seat next to him. “I have to admit that I’m impressed.”
Zulius was taken aback by his old rival’s words. Never in a thousand years had he imagined hearing him say something of the sort. He averted his gaze, not only to hide his surprised expression, but also to keep the tigertaur from seeing the slight redness that had spread across his cheeks.
“I’m so impressed, in fact, that I have a proposition for you.”
He looked back at Splendib, his expression one he could not read, and cocked a brow at him.
“What kind of proposition?” he asked carefully.
“A collaboration.” Splendib replied quickly. “Join me on my tour. If we combined our acts, we would be unstoppable.”
“Let me get this straight, you want me to join you?” Zulius scoffed, pushing himself off his seat as he felt his irritation returning. “After all you’ve put me through? After everything you did? Do you have any idea how long it took me to get over what you did to me in the talent show? Those emotional scars still haven’t healed!”
“Yes, I was a stupid kid, and yes, I did some pretty lousy things in my time, but that’s all in the past. Are you seriously going to let that keep you from broadening your horizons?”
“You wouldn’t be saying that if you had the smallest clue of how it feels to suffer at the hands of bullies like you!” Zulius exclaimed, now positively livid. “You can just forget it! Now get the flonk out of my sight before I really lose it!”
“Fine.” Splendib sighed as he got up and began heading towards the door. “It’s your loss.”
Zulius huffed and faced away from him, muttering insults under his breath as he gazed out the window to try and distract himself.
“I hate to think of all the opportunities of you wowing centaurs across the globe that will be wasted. It’s a shame, really.”
His ears perked up again and his muscles relaxed. As much as he hated to admit it, Splendib was right. It was almost like he had read his thoughts, or at least listened in on his earlier conversation with Samanthera.
“With a talent like yours, I’m sure there are centaurs out there who would kill to see you perform.” Splendib continued as he took his sweet time to reach the door. “I speak from experience. The masses are desperate for some decent entertainment.”
Zulius bit his lip; it was getting harder and harder for him not to react to such an offer. Sure, it would mean he would get to travel and perform all around the world, but would that really justify spending every waking moment with his sworn enemy? Was he really desperate enough to stretch his proverbial wings that we would go as far as selling his soul in such a way?
“But if you’re happy staying here with your cataur fans, then who am I to stop you?” the tigertaur said as he gripped the doorknob.
“Wait.” Zulius finally spoke up as he turned around. “How can I be sure you won’t just doublecross me again?”
“We’re both adults. I think we’ve outgrown such childish behavior.” Splendib replied as he turned and walked up to the zebrataur, extending a hand. “So what do you say? Partners?”
As much as he wanted to take him up on such an unique opportunity, Zulius still had some doubts about forming a partnership with Splendib. A part of him told him knew it wasn’t worth it, that the tigertaur was still as untrustworthy as he had been before and that this would just crash and burn again like it had ten years ago. However, another part of him worried that he would regret refusing Splendib’s proposition for the rest of his life and that he would never find another one like this no matter how hard he looked. And if he was forced to eat tuna for another meal, he swore he would —
He really needed to try performing somewhere else, if not for the sake of his career, for his own sake. Cataur Valley was becoming unbearable claustrophobic; he definitely needed a change of pace.
“OK, fine.” he finally agreed, shaking the tigertaurs hand somewhat reluctantly. “But you better not make me regret this.”
