#suicidal ideation tw
I think a concept that is so under-utilised is when a character starts to wish for unconsciousness/death as a way to escape torture, or tries to cause themself pain to distract from the pain inflicted upon them. I just think it’s interesting to see them reach a point mentally where they’re willing to take those options.
Dear depression,
I despise you and i wish i could cut you out of me. you make me drown whilst others float, you taint everything with mud and sickness. I am sick of crying and ripping out my hair because I am so damn scared to go outside. I want to die. I want to be eviscerated and incinerated until even the ash is nonexistent. I want someone to put me out of my misery, I want someone to rip and tear skin and flesh and bone out of me. i want to be able to wake up without feeling the world would have been better off if I had had an aneurism in my sleep. you are a leech and scum and I want you to get the fuck out of my head. because of you my mind is a quagmire, festering and unrelenting. My head is on fire and I have no release from you, the only thing keeping me from killing myself is that the idea of letting you win enragesme.
I may be a coward and a worthless pile of carbon and plasma but I am still so much more powerful than you or anything else you can throw at me. I don’t care if it’s selfish, if you want to hitch a ride on me then you’ve got yourself a fucking challenge buddy. when I do die it’ll be after I’ve had a meaningful life, not when you feel like fucking me over.
signed,
your pissed off vessel.
