#thor odinson x you
Summary: Maybe this is your fault. All you had to do was flip a coin.
Rating/Warnings:All (Dumb!Thor; Avengers Friendship; Avengers & reader friendship)
Challenge: “100 Drabbles of Randomness” by Miseria1 on Lunaescence Archives.
Tag List: @imaginesfire
Last Chance
It had taken hours (although it felt more like days), constant reiteration of the rules, and so many practice rounds it would make a normal person’s head spin. But after all this time and effort, you knew Thor could do it.
“Ready?” you asked as you held out your fist.
Though he didn’t look as confident as usual, he reached out his own. “Ready.“
"Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock,” you chanted. At the end, you triumphantly thrust out a lizard.
Thor, however, continued to leave his fist in the air as he stared at your hand.
“Uh. Thor? You gonna stick with that rock there?”
“That depends,” he said slowly. “What does rock do?”
The rest of the group around you groaned. Even Natasha fell back onto the couch with her head in her hands.
“Really?” Bruce mumbled. “Really?”
“I am sorry,” Thor said, and had the grace to look sheepish. “I do not understand this strange Midgardian custom of choosing things.”
Steve heaved a sigh.
“Okay, you know what?” Tony got to his feet. “We’re done. You and Blondie here should have settled this hours ago. We’re just going to watch–”
“No one wants to watch another documentary about you, Stark,” Steve said into his hands.
The rest of the group made noises of agreement. Tony, apparently thinking that this was somehow your fault, glowered at you and gestured at Thor.
“By all means, spend the rest of our lives trying to teach an immortal dog new tricks.”
You glowered at him in response. Thor had to wave his free hand in front of your eye to bring your focus back to him.
“[Name]?”
This time, it was you that sighed. “Scissor cuts paper; paper covers rock; rock crushes lizard; lizard poisons Spock; Spock smashes scissors; scissors decapitate lizard; lizard eats paper; paper disproves Spock; Spock vaporizes rock, and rock crushes scissors.” You made a cutting motion with two fingers in the air. “Got it?”
He beamed. “I understand completely. Thank you, [Name].”
“No problem.” You sat up straight once more. “Let’s just get this over with before I have to listen to another eight hours about the Stark Expo. Ready?”
“Hey, I’m just saying,” Tony called. “This is your last chance. You guys don’t decide this round, we’re doing whatI want to do. My tower, my rules.”
“Ready?” you asked again without even showing any sign that you had heard him. Thor nodded.
“I am prepared!”
“Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock!”
You held up Spock. Thor continued to hold up rock. The only difference this round was that he looked delighted.
“I win!” he cried joyously.
“What?” You looked from your hand to his. “No, you don’t. Spock vaporizes rock.”
"But Spock is an alien not of Asgard.“
You nodded.
"And a rock is of Midgard.”
"Um…so?“
"The only things that can defeat those of Midgard are those of Asgard! Thus, the victory is mine.”
You stared. And stared. And stared some more. Finally, without taking his eyes off the still-blank television screen, Bruce spoke up:
“He still doesn’t get it.”
Looks like you’d all get to spend your night learning about Stark Industries again after all.
