#to my ex

It’s the end of the road, there’s no turning back to home

It’s been a long way I’ve walked alone

and i wouldn’t change what I’ve seen, because I’ve got stuff to call my own

I’ve always liked the old, but that doesn’t mean it’s gold

Now I’ve moved on, and I’m getting to know feelings I had always longed for

But I’m still scared that I’ve taken the wrong road

and that I’m not where I’m supposed to be, because I’m used to never be

I’m happy you made me go,

because I could’ve never found what I love in that chest I used to think smelled like home.

Am I your little game?

Was I just a game?

Was I just a bet you made with yourself?

Did you try to suck up all of the air I still had left?,

Am I addicted to the feeling of being wanted?

Maybe your touch was all I needed to be haunted,

You hurt me and maybe that’s what I wanted

Did you ever see me?, was I invisible to you?

When you said you loved me, did you mean it?

Will I ever get to know whether I was real, or if I was just a pale ghost hanging onto your bones?

Sometimes I still want you by my side, yet you really made me hurt inside

could I forgive the past?

Maybe you think I’m just your little game,

And maybe that’s why even after a year you still text me

without knowing that you can’t fix anything, yet you still don’t even try

Feelings fade and times have changed, I guess now I’m more myself

maybe you just kept me tied onto your feet, begging you for a little of peace

i made a lot of mistakes, yet something I’d never regret is walking away.

i thought you were water, crystaline, clear, refreshing water… but no, you were strong tasted, bitter, it burned when i drank you, you were vodka. the kind of vodka that leaves you blind and stupid. the kind of vodka that makes you cry and vomit.
sometimes you tasted like a shirley temple, or a sex on the beach… you know, one of those sweet drinks that make your teeth hurt. those drinks that you can never find the vodka taste in… but then hangover comes, and all you can taste is bitterness in your tongue and a toothache that makes you think your teeth will fall off. But it all passes by, you know? it all evaporates.- even vodka.