#yccjungrk
let me down slowly.
a closed starter for @rkchungha
the month has gone by fairly quickly ( and oddly painlessly ) for gahyeon … for once, and she doesn’t know how to feel about it. she feels like it’s the calm before the storm, before she inevitably doesn’t get chosen and just gets to watch her friend move on without her. maybe she’s wrong, but she’s not entirely sure - all she knows is that there’s a not-good feeling stirring in her chest as she waits for the month to end. but it doesn’t seem to come fast enough.
not that gahyeon wants the project to be over, she enjoys working with the other girls and all - but she certainly wasn’t built for this sort of thing. she should’ve realized when she’d heard it was basically a competition behind-the-scenes that it just wasn’t going to be something she was comfortable with. and yet, here she was - all she wanted to d was her best. so, she’d try. and trying she was. gahyeon wasn’t sure the last time she’d worked so hard for something, let alone something she wasn’t even sure she wanted. with sua gone most of the time, gahyeon didn’t really focus her attention on taking care of herself as much. after all, there wasn’t really anyone that seemed to pay enough attention to realize how long she was spending in the studio.
which was why at the end of this particular practice, gahyeon felt exhausted. it wasn’t often that gahyeon actually let it take over her, however this time around gahyeon couldn’t bring herself to stand in the practice room any longer, her body ached and she just wanted to relax for a little while after practice. which is when she linked arms with chungha and threw on a bright smile. “unnie ~ we should go get some dinner or something … i feel like we’ve barely spoken this entire time we’ve been together. ”she points out with a pout. “we should enjoy the time together while we have it. ”she says with a nod.
chungha couldn’t lie: her mind has been all over the place. with mina moving in, her own inner turmoil with the project and missing the absolute crap out of her girlfriend, chungha was basically spacey most of the time. it must have seemed as though that she stopped caring but the truth was the opposite. she cared so much. too much. it threw her in for a loop.
but since coming to her conclusion on her own, she feels a lot lighter. she’s not taking every month so seriously to the point where she feels worthless. with this new outlook she sort of accepted what she expects to be the inevitable: she won’t be joining the heartz lineup. but she’s fine with taking the back seat and supporting the heck out of the girls. she refuses to take this idea and just be bum weight. she will perform every month (and try her damndest not to care about the decision) and will give it her all during group evaluations. just because she doesn’t think she’ll make it doesn’t mean she should make it any harder for the girls.
she’s feeling better than she’s felt since the project started.
she smiles at her friend when they link arms. ah, food sounded like a lovely idea. “yes we should!” she leans into yoojung with a smile. they were at each other’s hips the first month she joined the project but since then it seemed as though they’ve gotten distant. chungha fully blamed herself for it. she should have putting more effort on checking up on the other.
“yeah let’s eat something big and hearty!” she offers with a grin. she leads the other out of the practise room and down the hall. they could go to one of the restaurants that are down the street from the building. it’ll be a bit expensive but it’d be worth it for the sake of them spending time together. “i know i’ve been all over the place lately. i’m so sorry, yoojungie. it’s been kind of crazy lately….” but still, it wasn’t right for her ignore her friend.
“i missed you so much.”
once in a lifetime.
a closed starter for @rkxluda
gahyeon feels like the entire heartz project has been a whirling experience for herself, she simply can’t imagine how the project has been for the other girls. although gahyeon guesses it’s a little different for the already-debuted girls, considering the fact they weren’t doing monthly evaluations anymore but trying to figure out how to navigate life as an idol. but still, gahyeon imagined it was just as confusing to navigate through, the fact that gahyeon was confused meant the other girls were probably much the same. she just felt like she was being whisked around at the whims of sphere - and she imagined debut felt much the same.
but quite honestly, gahyeon hadn’t seen many of the debuted girls since they were taken away and put into the dormitory. after all, they were idols, technically. and now with the subunit complete with yena’s addition and plans to start getting things together for the girls, gahyeon could only imagine.
“how’re you doing ?”gahyeon asks one day, care to make sure luda wasn’t in the middle of doing something particularly important. “two years ago we were just getting used to our schedules as trainees, and now you’ve officially debuted and you’re going to be debuting in heartz first subunit … is it strange ?”she asks, brows raised. because gahyeon, well - she couldn’t imagine it. she hardly believed that she just had her contract renewed, actually debuting seemed like a foreign concept. “you guys have a busy month prepared for you, don’t you ? ” she asks, with a slight frown. “yet another month sphere is keeping you all away from the rest of us. they think you’re too good for us trainees. ” she jokes with a chuckle.
The only thing Luda was sad about when it came to being chosen so early, was that she didn’t really get to spend time with the others as much anymore. They were already 6 at the dorm, so she wasn’t lonely at all and she wasn’t sure if she looked forward to being 12 eventually with as little space as they had, but she was worried for how much longer she would be able to see them at least occasionally. No one could tell who Sphere would choose eventually, after all.
“Pretty well, aside from the nervousness, what about you?” the girl returned the question, rather not going into too much detail, but also feeling much more at ease than the past months already.
“It’s really strange… you know, there’s always those idols you hear about, having trained for 5 years, some even for 8 or more, so I didn’t really think about debut until the casting call… it still doesn’t feel entirely real, actually,” she chuckled, trying to explain herself as best as she could. “But it’s exciting, too, in a good way.”
“We haven’t actually gotten the schedule just yet,” she continued, tilting her head in thought, wondering how busy they’d really be, “but I guess so. It’s better than just sitting around, though, right? I wish we could come back to train with you once promotions are done, but I guess that’s unrealistic…” It may be a bit of a weird wish, but she would much rather go back to them for the usual training until the whole group debut… unless Sphere had more surprises in store.
Luda chuckled at the other girl’s words, still convinced that she was no better than them and simply having suited the concept very well, but she understood that it was a joke and a serious answer would make their conversation rather awkward.
“Aaah, they’re keeping the best for last, they’re simply using us to get Heartz’ name out there, to propel you to stardom,” she joked back.
yoojung can’t help the slight pinkening of her cheeks as shiah pulls her over – especially as she calls her a sweet dongsaeng. “how could you not deserve a sweet dongsaeng ? you’re just as, if not more, sweet as i am. you deserve every sweet dongsaeng. ”she points out with a pout. “if anyone’s treating unnie unfairly, let me know. i … won’t fight them, but tell them to stop because it’s not fair to you. ”she says with a nod. at the point of yoojung improving dramatically over her time at royal, yoojung blinks – it’s hard to believe anyone’s noticed. then again, they’re all technically competing with one another. why wouldn’t other people keep tabs on others ? regardless, yoojung smiles lightly. “ahh, unnie … ”yoojung murmurs. “thank you … it’s … ”well, it mostly had to do with her inherent need to please people. to progress. to make a difference in her typical style. to be the best she could be. to prove certain people wrong. “it’s been hard … but i want to be the best i can be. ”even if that’s at the expense of her own health.
she chooses not to comment on shiah forcing her to take care of herself – without a push, yoojung’s unsure whether she’d actually do it herself.
“ you’realready the best leader and unnie you could be. ”yoojung points out. “but … i really do appreciate it. ”she murmurs. “i never do things like this to treat myself – so i’m very thankful you’d choose to bring me here. ”
nodding along with shiah’s explanation, yoojung can’t help but wonder exactly how someone had time to treat themselves like this. then again, yoojung supposes she hasn’t had the most average of lives as a young adult. quirking her head to the side, yoojung shakes her head in response to the other. “i’m afraid i haven’t … ”yoojung murmurs in response before raising her brows at the elder. “wow … ”yoojung murmurs – it’s hard to believe she knew anyone who came from money, they weren’t people she typically found herself around. the fact that shiah had … “that must’ve been nice. ”yoojung says, her voice a bit distant. it’s hard to imagine being able to do such a thing – to actually be able to go out without a care in the world. “do … you ever miss it ? ”yoojung asks, quirking her head to the side. “ i can’t imagine the trainee life is as glamorous as yours was beforehand. ”she notes.
she clutches the menu in her hands a little more tightly as yoojung comments on how ‘it must have been nice’. not having to worry about food being put on the table was nice, yes. being able to buy pretty much whatever she wanted, sure, was nice. that life though, it was a whole other kind of hell, and it was not nice at all. “not one bit.” she answers to the question about her missing it. “i was engaged before. against my will, basically. my mother groomed me to be the perfect prospective wife for any up-and-coming male socialite heir. the bigger the company and family fortune, the better.” she sighs a bit, blanking looking through the menu so she wouldn’t have to make eye contact with the other girl. “it was all to repair the damage from my father leaving her for a man. i was her damage control. i wasn’t allowed to go to school or do any hobbies that might make me ‘too smart’ and scare off men with easily bruised egos.”
she sets the menu aside and sighs. “now, because i broke off the engagement and moved in with my dad, i have no contact with any of my four siblings.” she never spoke about her family, ever. the fact that she even had siblings, let alone four, was probably a shock. “but i have freedom. freedom is better than money. you can always work to earn money, but freedom? that’s a much harder fight.”
she takes a breath, trying to cast aside the bitter taste in her mouth from the recollection of her past life and assumes a soft attempt at a smile. “shall we? i need this a lot more than i thought i did.”
yoojung was surprised when shiah had invited her to come along for a sort of spa day rather suddenly; but then again, yoojung knew that everyone in royal knew everyone else’s business. and yoojung was getting, well restless. watching the mgas made her want to do more than just what she was at the moment, and although their short vacation was welcome, yoojung wasn’t the type who liked to sit around and do nothing. not that running around at the beach was nothing, but yoojung wasn’t exactly accustomed to vacationing and relaxing – thus, when they returned, yoojung was spending more and more time in the dance studio. not to mention she was already packing more onto her schedule with her choreography videos – but she had to do something to keep her skill sharp. so, she guessed it made sense. plus the two didn’t spend much time outside training together, so it was a nice break from the norm.
not to mention, likely well deserved for the both of them.
scanning over the menu of items and packages, yoojung realizes just how out of her element she is. sure she’d always understood the attraction people had to getting massages and doing this sort of thing – it was like the epitome of self-care. however, she didn’t exactly know what to expect out of it. sure, she could read the descriptions, but she wasn’t sure the last time she’d gone to a spa; she hums as she glances over the items, before shiah looks to her with the question of what she wanted, claiming that she deserves it; and yoojung can’t help but blush. “ahh, unnie, what makes you think i deserve this ?”she asks, pouting slightly. “you’re working just as hard as i am. we both deserve it. ” she points out with a smile. she hums for a moment before shrugging; “i’m not sure. do you come here often ? what do youusually do ?”she asks, quirking her head to the side. “i think that hot stone therapy seems interesting … maybe help release all the tension we don’t know’s built up. ” she chuckles before pausing and asking, “they’re not gonna like … be really hot, right ?”
she pauses again - “that’s a dumb question, of course they won’t burn or anything. ”she murmurs; “maybethat’s why i need this. ”she chuckles.
shiah gazes on the younger girl with much affection in her eyes, and her little quip about them both deserving it makes shiah lean over and pull the younger girl into a half hug. “i don’t deserve such a sweet dongsaeng like you.” she presses a kisses to the top of the girl’s head before releasing her, then gazes back to the menu, a smile playing on her lips. “i say it because you’ve improved at a really rapid pace over your time at royal as a trainee. i don’t think i’ve seen anyone work as hard as you have in my time here, and it’s really amazing to see. i just want you to take care of yourself as well, so i’m forcing you to now.” she chuckles, her nose wrinkling up with the action. “you care so much about your progress and training, and it’s admirable. you really want to become an idol and it shows. so i want to be the best leader and unnie i can for you.” she looks over at the other with her eyes full of adoration for the younger girl. since when had shiah gotten so sappy?
“hot stone therapy it is!” shiah giggles softly at yoojung’s question, shaking her head. “i’ve done it before, it’s nice. the stones are very warm, but the warmth helps the muscles in your body relax. it’s a pre-cursor to a massage, kind of. it makes it easier to release knots and tension.” shiah looks around at the all-too-familiar establishment, her expression fading some. “i used to come here all the time, back when… ah.” she sighs a bit, deciding that opening up to yoojung now is okay. she can trust the younger girl. “does the name shannon yoo mean anything to you? it’s my english name, and the name i used when i was… a socialite.” shiah comes from old money and her family’s history was consider ‘embarrassing’ so she had found herself in the tabloids here and there, not that the younger generation would really pay attention to that kind of stuff. “my family frequented here a lot, i was basically here every week.” and i gave it up to become a trainee. shiah had definitely made the right choice, she didn’t miss her old life at all.
