#andreil headcanons

the foxes in high school if they were not traumatized au

part 2 (ft. everyone being oblivious)

when andreil starts dating no one really notices, even though andrew and neil will mention their relationship but people sort of just think it’s a weird inside joke. this is because of many reasons, but here’s a few of them:

• kevin knows they’re together and will tell them to stop flirting whenever he is in their presence, but neil will always go “ew cooties” while andrew just looks offended, and people assume it’s becuase he’s been accused of flirting and not because his bf just said he has cooties
• most people think andrew is straight even though he regularly makes gay jokes, because they think it’s his weird way of supporting nicky (even if a lot of the jokes feel vaguely homophobic), and that him and neil just have a weird jock bromance going on
• whenever neil wants to hold andrew’s hand he very dramatically goes “give me your hand” in a weird voice and then andrew (very reluctantly) will put out his hand, and then once they are walking neil very dramatically swings their hands back and forth until andrew tells him to calm down
• when they are sitting on sofas andrew sits at one end while neil sits side ways with his legs on top of andrew’s lap, taking up the entire couch. everyone thinks they are just being assholes who are unwilling to share a couch (which yeah, they definitely are) but it’s actually just that cuddling is very awkward when other people are on the same couch as you, so they’re improvising.
• andrew and neil will sometimes take kevin with them on their dates. kevin is horrifically bisexual and obsessed with aaron, so andrew says it’s because he wants to keep an eye on him. neil says it’s because kevin doesn’t trust them to not do something dumb that ends with them kicked off the exy team. the rest of the school thinks that they are just the ultimate friendship trio. when kevin starts dating aaron people are like “omg but what about neil?” and kevin’s just kind of like “he has andrew?” and people are like “but you’re dating andrew, right?” and kevin is very eager to list of all the reasons he would never date andrew, and why aaron is husband material.

andrew *turning left in the maserati*: that man better fucking brake for us otherwise we’ll die

neil: i would be the only one dead. he would hit my side of the car and then i would be smushed to bits all over your car

andrew: ew, let’s avoid that. i don’t want your bloody remains in my car, that’d be a pain to clean out.

kevin *sitting in the back, being ignored*: i like how your first thought was “neil’s death would inconvenience me.” and not “omg that’d be awful, neil would be dead!”

no confession scene will ever have the same impact that the fucking ‘doesn’t mean i wouldn’t blow you’ scene had

the foxes in high school if they were not traumatized au

part 1 (ft. andreil being absolutely horrible)

nicky is the president of the gsa club and tries to get andrew and neil to join. it goes about as well as you would expect. for some reason nicky thought asking them in a public place would go better, but instead it ends with andrew and neil getting sent to the office.

because apparently loudly announcing that you and your boyfriend would not join the gsa because you ‘hate gay people’ is not an inclusive school appropriate response.

neil then made it worse becuase when the principal asked him why they would say that when they are involved in a homosexual arrangment, neil informed wymack that he isn’t gay, and that he would never touch another man. when wymack gives him a Look, he then turns to andrew and goes

“oh shit babe, you’re a guy? well this is awkward”

and mr. wymack is not paid enough for this

and then becuase andrew is a great boyfriend who values communication and lives to cause problems goes

“ok so am i your boyfriend or not?”

and neil, with his two brain cells replies

“we can’t be boyfriends. becuase im not gay. but you can be my super smash bro :)”

“ok, sick dude”

and then they kiss and dear god wymack wants to retire so badly but he has had a teachers salary for the past 25 years and he has not been principal long enough to have a good retirement, but maybe McDonald’s is hiring

*andreil coffee shop au*

andrew: your total is $4.50. your nails look nice~

neil:oh thanks! my friend painted them for me!

andrew: could i have your number?

neil: i dont think my order had a number?

andrew:

andrew: here’s your drink. have a nice day.

neil, 10 minutes later, thinking about the hot barista: oh shit he was flirting with me

i was thinking about how Edgy™ andrew is from neil’s pov but so many fans have realized he is really just a gay traumatized emo kid

so i have decided that andrew is definitely very active on twitter and has a substantial following. he mainly posts about his stupid little boyfriend, horrific food combinations, jokes about therapy, and random gay thoughts

none of the foxes knew he had twitter (except for his stupid boyfriend) so when his PR agent got on his back about being active on social medie he just changed his twitter handle to his name and that’s how he came out

allison feels betrayed because she had been following andrew for almost as long as he’d been twittering and is horrified that she actually thinks andrew is a funny person

the real reason andrew went through neil’s bag was to figure out his clothing size so he could pick out a Hot outfit for neil when they dragged him to eden’s

thinking about andrew and neil sitting together on long bus rides

neil sleeping on andrew’s shoulder and andrew resting his head on top of neil’s

andrew sharing a pair of ear bud’s with neil, listening to playlists andrew put way too much time into

neil bringing a backpack full of snacks and energy drinks. andrew tells him the only reason he deals with him is because they are trail mix compatible. andrew gets all the raisins and chocolate, while neil gets all the nuts