#college dating

There are a lot of things they don’t tell you about going to college when your boyfriend is almost two hours away. And by they, I mean all the advisers, teachers, parents, friends, relatives, and administrators that are there to prepare you for university life.

They don’t tell you that it can be a really big struggle to figure out the bus schedule and how to visit your boyfriend when he lives 85.5 miles away, in a major, overpopulated city. They don’t help you pack to spend the night with him, or give you bus fare when you need a transfer two counties away from your university.

They don’t tell you how lonely you will get when you’re walking up 6 flights of stairs to your dorm room with nothing but a bag full of anthropology homework, even though we’ve only had class for 3 days.

They don’t tell you how awkward and uncomfortable it is when guys introduce themselves to you, and suddenly act as though you have the black plague when you mention you have a boyfriend studying at a different university, when all you ever wanted to do is get to know someone.

They don’t tell you how you will cry when your roommate isn’t around and how much you’ll miss them. They don’t even give you someone to tell how sad you are.

What they DO tell you, is how you’re “going to make so many friends” and “getting involved is the best way to meet people.” I want to meet people, but I also want to see my boyfriend.

Fin.

Admit it – when it comes to hitting up the dating scene, it’s easy to find yourself frustrated. All you’re looking for is commitment. Yet, somehow the other fish in the sea don’t want to nibble on your fabulousness.

The reality is that it’s not you – it’s them: the guys. About 99.9 percent of them just aren’t ready for commitment. Why, you ask? Too many toxic bachelors and bachelorettes.

1. The freshman

If you’re looking to date a guy or girl in the post-secondary world – good luck. This is their first time away from home and probably their first time away from their first relationship too. They’re hoping to explore and figure out just whom they want in a perfect mate; there is nothing wrong with that. I’d rather have a partner who actually knows what he or she wants. For those commitment-bound, though, it can be disappointing finding that perfect person on campus, only to find out that he may be interested in you…and everyone else.

Yet, there’s a definitely lure to tapping into the barely-legal dating scene. True, you may be flirting with statutory rape danger, but the idea of finding a high-school fling is kind of hot. Remember those days where you would drive to lover’s lane and just make out? Ahh, those “dates” were perfect.

Pros: Fast and fun times on the town.
Cons: Your relationship will last a New-York minute, and the odds of maturity? Um, yeah…

2. The business major

This person is definitely a good-on-paper kind of mate, but beware of what’s hidden. He or she is critiquing your every move and secretly writing it down on a notebook when they get home. Though they may pick up the tab, he or she may be intimidated by your success. After all, he’s the one who wants to bring home the bacon. Talk about sexism.

3. The pre-law type

Unlike the business guy or girl, your law-school beau-to-be is great at stimulating your mind. However, you should expect some arguments in your future. He or she’ll likely present a few “Exhibit A’s” when you fight over the remote. If you’re a member of the all-exclusive Mensa, then maybe you stand a fighting chance. If not, don’t expect to land this guy…unless you’re a defense attorney.

The great part about a lawyer type is that they’re probably really smart, prepared to analyze any case and can probably get you out of a speeding ticket. Who wouldn’t love a quality like that?

4. The journalist

Your secrets are never truly a secret. Everything you say to the journo is “on the record,” and he or she is constantly digging for that exclusive interview.  The odds of you actually enjoying dating a journalism major is slim. Besides, they’re not going to make a lot of money. Do you really want to shack up with that? Ramen noodles are not forever. Diamonds are forever.

The journalist can be fun, though, overall. In their messy world, they can tackle a lot of different responsibilities at once. They know how to research stuff (study buddy, anyone?) The possibilities are endless…again, as long as you don’t expect them to pick up the tab.

5. The Greek life-bound

Their social agenda includes pulling off horrendous pranks, mastering a keg stand and perfecting his beer pong game. Unless your sorority is building a float with him or her at homecoming, the odds of you actually co-mingling, let alone dating, is slim.

Fraternity guys typically flock to sorority chicks. It’s just an unwritten rule.

But if you’re into socials, speakeasies and non-stop talk about your “brothers” and “sisters” in everything Greek, then it really isn’t so bad. His sexual libido is spot on and always ready for a fling. However, it’s too bad he’s still learning what to do with his “tools,” if you know what I’m saying.

6. The grad student

Finally, a man or woman who has some experience but is still fresh and fun. The good part is that you’re likely to be on similar pages in terms of your budding careers. The only flaw is that because you’re fresh into the job scene, the odds of you staying in one place are pretty slim. This is also prime time for moving and other explorations in life.

Pros: This guy or gal could be “the one,” and hey may be able to afford taking you to places worthwhile. Vacations and jewelry aren’t out of the realm of fine possibilities.

Cons: He or she may expect you to commit to him and your career. Sorry, some people still live in the late 1800’s.

Regardless of where you are on the dating world, just keep things fresh and realistic. You need to be sure you’re finding someone who is, as cheesy as it sounds, on the same page as you. Most prospects out of that will led to disappointment. Sorry, ladies. Keep it real and have some fun.