I had an exchange today with a fellow Master and this got me thinking about the practical aspects of organizing a polygamous relationship. Working as a professional in a field which closely scrutinizes the meaning and effects of all sorts of relationships, I have come to some insights, which I wish to share.
It is all well and good to fantasize about having a posse of mindless slaves or obliging subs to do your bidding but how is this going to be sustainable? If you have managerial/leadership experience, you will know that human resource management can be the most challenging aspect of the job. Every single recruit to the cause comes with a different set of skills, personal backgrounds, interests and dislikes, values and goals, and personal attitudes and aptitudes. This will affect the way they relate to others within the unit, their abilities, the effort they will put in, their compliance, and their longer-term commitment.
It is much the same in setting up a harem. Your ability to manage multiple people really depends on your ability to select the right individuals, and unless you can predict the future, you will likely fail. People invariably will present their most pleasing aspects during the first few meetings, showcasing their hidden flaws much later on, when things start becoming comfortable.
So the following will detail my advice on how to start and maintain a harem. Please note, I am interested essentially in polygyny which is maintaining a relationship between one man and multiple women, so my advice will reference this lifestyle within a dominance and submission framework. However, I do think aspects of this will still be applicable to other poly-amorous lifestyles.
1. Probably the best thing you could do is to enter into a relationship with a girl pair/group at the same time. For girls interested in this lifestyle, I always suggest talking to your sisters, friends and other female relatives and forming a harem with them before finding your Master. For Masters, look for a group of girls wanting to enter into a relationship with you at the same time. Sisters, friends and relatives have a natural bond which will endear them to each other and promote the continuation of the relationship.
2. For those already in a relationship, I suggest getting your partner emotionally invested in a polygamous setup. This whole thing will only work if both partners have the same vision. It is only natural that 2 people coming into a relationship don’t see eye to eye on every single thing. However, it is also natural that individuals in a relationship grow to adopt some of the interests of the other. So, introduce your partner to this lifestyle and monitor the uptake. To this end, you can introduce them to any number of Gorean, Cuckquean and similar literature, groups, blogs or websites. If they are interested, proceed to point 3. If they are not interested, do not pursue this for it will only end in tears.
3. For those in a relationship with a willing partner, delegate the task of finding the other partners to her. Similarly for girls reading this who are already in a relationship with a guy who is willing to Master a harem, take it upon yourself to find the other partners.
4. It will be infinitely better to find partners from the pool of women you already know. This means within sisters, friends and female relatives. As for reasons why, please read point 1.
5. It will be essential for girls involved to completely serve under the leadership of their Master without limits, surrendering any moral compass or conscience to their Master, and unquestioningly serving all his interests whether it appeals to them or not. In the less than ideal setting where there are limits, these should be observed by all members equally.
6. It will be essential for all members to maintain secrecy about their lifestyle in regard to all outside members. All potential new recruits should be vetted extensively before letting them into your exclusive group. This is both for safety and your peace of mind.
7. It will be essential for there to be some sort of agreed hierarchy within the group. Order and structure are essential for good and clear group dynamics. This should be enforced by the more senior members of the group.
8. It will be essential for group activities to extend to other areas of life apart from sexual activities so relationships can become wholesome.
9. One must think about the costs of running such an endeavour and really, a stay at home group of slaves that is not generating any income, is neither practical nor sustainable. So, I would suggest gainful employment be sought by all members to contribute towards the Master’s harem.
10. If members of the group are threatening group dynamics by not observing the hierarchy, not observing secrecy, not contributing financially and otherwise, not following the group rules, have severe mental illnesses or personality disorders, or engaging in damaging habits (severe drugs and alcohol, self harming and overdosing, violent/criminal acts, undisclosed infidelity) have a discussion within the group and release them from the group. Trying to work with these problems will do more harm than good for the harem.
So there you have it. This is actually quite a serious post. I have been thinking about these issues for awhile but I have finally gained the impetus to put it in writing. I hope you aspiring polygamists out there will find the above points useful. If you wish to discuss anything at all, do not hesitate to contact me.
Here’s a fun game to play the next time he fucks the superior: Have the better woman hold open her pussy while he pulls out and cums on it. Then, put the wife on cleanup duty. If the mistress gets pregnant because any was missed or your tongue just smeared it around, it’ll be all your fault.
When training a cuckquean make sure to get input from the Cuckcake. A good Cuckcake has great ideas on how to humiliate a cuckquean and helps train her to be pathetically obedient. Currently my cuckquean sucks my fat cock every single morning as soon as she wakes up.
I’m going to put my cuck through some training soon! Does anyone have any recommendations? I’m thinking about starting with tying her hands behind her back and face fucking her for starters.
He got back really late last night - well after I’d already gone to bed - and then I only saw him briefly before he left for work this morning. He told me it went well and that they talked about all kinds of things, including my cuckqueanism and things that turn them on, and that she seems really sweet, but also very shy. Being the true gent that he is, he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable or push anything (this meeting was just meant to be for drinks, after all), so they didn’t even kiss, but they are planning to meet up again soon to have some proper (i.e. filthy) fun together. Watch this space!
I’m so glad it went well! Looking forward to updates!
We don’t love the term cuck We understand its origin and we love the lifestyle or at least our version of the lifestyle. The word itself for us is like the word MOIST for others …which I’ll never understand because the word moist brings deep and thrilling connotations of naughty fun for me However having the word cuck attached to something I deeply desire does nothing for either of us honestly. So we refrain from referring to @hernaughtyking ‘s sides as cuckcakes within our own life and call them our little Cupcakes.. because that too brings me joy and who doesn’t love to eat a tasty cupcake? Does anyone else take issue with the word or any other word commonly used within alternative lifestyle choices?
Indeed there’s no consensus over how to call the lovers. It goes from Lover, Girlfriend, Vixen, Cuckcake, ‘cake, slut, and another half dozen. So your choice, even though positively personal, still falls perfectly in the common usage of quean language :3
The term “cuckquean” is a useful monicker to help loosely identify a woman who enjoys her man fucking other women. But that’s it. Whatever else happens as part of that dynamic is down to the couple. This may or may not include humiliation. It may or may not mean that the wife is present or involved. It may or may not mean that the wife is submissive to the other woman. There are no rules about being a cuckquean; none other than those established between the quean and her husband.
One side effect of hour long oral is a lot of meditative time, or time to mull over things. I am so slave centered my utter resistance to cuckquean annoyed me, not just because I wasn’t able to accommodate my Daddy’s needs, but because I was *so* devestated by the very idea. When stuff like that happens I have to know the root… Knowing Is Half The Battle…
My self esteem, body issues, and overall feelings of unwantedableness really didn’t seem enough for how much I was freaked out by the very idea. It took me confronting a concept I tend to be evasive on, especially here on this aspect of my kink.
I am a little, sometimes a middle, I am not like any of the little community it seems at times. I am not a little like Tumblr’s little community, but that’s another post for my main Tumblr, I am a slave little basically. But I am a sexual little, my sexual fantasies… my sexuality… is one hundred percent me as not an adult.
And there was the problem: all cuckquean stuff I have seen, all the cuckquean stuff seemed to be humiliation of a worthless and or ugly adult. This included stuff my Daddy sent me.
You change “worthless ugly cunt” to “silly bunny is too little to please Daddy alone /needs to learn” and like leveling up or a lock sliding in to place *click* it doesn’t devestate; it works for me. Even the more severe cuckquean humiliation, not just the dressing Daddy up hot husband kind, works.
I need to write some more specifics of phrases that work for me and all but uh where is the little cuckquean Tumblrs?
The community of cuckqueans that are not interested in humiliation but focus on voyeurism and compersion are yes a minority, but definitely still around. Of course there’s an issue when you’re looking for porn that matches your tastes because even without humiliation, sex has a very specific ‘adult’ aesthetic. I’d say you have way more chances of finding close minded people on Fetlife than here on tumblr (and you have already correctly addressed the fact that the DDlg community here is different than the one on FL, and even there they openly recognize it).
For what is worth, I’m pretty much there on the line between a middle and a more generic brat sub, so do count me in, and if you ever want to talk you now know where to find me.
I’m starting to get really excited - and impatient - about his date tomorrow night. I’m hoping that they’ll click in person and want to meet again soon after to fuck. Or better still, he won’t be home until really late as he’ll be fucking her there and then. Since Princess mostly went off the scene, he’s been missing having a “special girl” so I’m hoping this will work out. It’ll be great for him to have that again; to become besotted with her and speak to her every day, to have his cock rock hard for her all the time, to always be thinking about her perfect little pussy and when he’ll fuck her again… fingers crossed for tomorrow night!
So last night I decided to change the dynamic in our relationship. I invited my husband’s girlfriend to dinner without my husband knowing..when she showed up, I moved to the other side of the booth so she could sit next to him. My husband was confused and a little uncomfortable with people thinking they were the couple and I was the friend. But as usual his discomfort didn’t last long, with her beautiful body and face she could get him to do anything she wanted. She amped up the PDA and if we weren’t in a public place I’m sure she would have fucked him right there and then, she was definitely into the scene of her being his main girl.
When we got home later, I was overcome with some emotion..love? Affection? Don’t know…
But I felt for her, I get to have my husband whenever, but she has to wait for their date nights and usually I’m involved either watching or joining in. I wanted this to be special, I wanted her to feel loved and wanted her to feel how I feel. I know she loves him and he loves her, I know I’ll always be his number 1..but for a short time..I wanted her to be his number 1 and only, I asked her to stay over the weekend and for the whole week. Without me in the room watching or participating, just the 2 of them for a while week (or longer…depending on how this goes)
When I told them that my husband just made sure I was 100% sure this is what I wanted. His girlfriend was ecstatic, she’s been waiting to get him to all by herself. She couldn’t stop thanking me. She practically ran up to our room..my husband just looked at me with a slight smile and said..“you’re really into this, aren’t you?”. I didn’t know what to say so I nodded my head. Kissed him good night and told her to fuck her good.
Hearing the moans, groans, screams and the bed hitting against the wall. Hearing him tell her how much he loves her pussy, and her telling him that his dick belongs to her was making me feel so many different emotions. I woke up to sounds of them fucking…forget jealousy, insecurity..etc. Im so horny right now!!! I want to wake up to the sounds of my husband fucking her everyday!
#cuckquean #real #cuckqueanwife #sohorny
“I get to have my husband whenever, but she has to wait for their date nights”
This hits so close to home! And it’s extremely important because I clearly remember how my negative feelings toward cuckqueaning only started getting better once I managed to really empathize with the Other Woman. The moment I stopped reading them like the enemy, like a threat to my stability, and instead started actually understanding how it feels being in their shoes, that was the point of no return to me. The bad side of my jealousy never recovered from that blow, and now I can’t help but always try to make them feel comfortable and welcome, find ways to give them space and privacy and whatever else I can give that they need.
Growing up, I was always aware that I wasn’t as pretty or as thin as the other girls. My mum insisted my hair was kept at shoulder length and so the long hair I craved wasn’t meant for me. The other girls had long hair.
When I started puberty at the tender age of 9, that further alienated me from the other girls. I would sometimes get spots, or have greasy hair and I started to gain weight. The other girls still had clear skin and slender frames.
As a teenager, I was tall (for my age), heavily set and a whirring mess of hormones. I had no fashion sense and hadn’t discovered the miracles make up could perform. The other girls were well dressed and made up.
At 16, I got my first boyfriend. Realising that someone actually fancied me was a huge boost and I gained enough confidence to understand that whilst I might not be drop-dead gorgeous, I mustn’t be too bad. The other girls were single but kissing lots of boys.
Coming into adulthood with a couple of relationships under my belt, I still struggled with insecurity but was ok enough to get by… then I met my husband when I was 20. He was older and so clever and funny. We fell deeply in love and had a wild sex life. I felt loved and wanted. The other girls were dating immature boys and being treated badly by them.
Fast forward to now: we’re still deeply in love, I still feel wanted, I still feel loved. But our wild sex life now involves him fucking those other girls - the girls who haven’t managed to find their own decent guy. The girls who I always looked up to as the perfect depiction of femininity. The girls who are still gorgeous and who are still hotter than me. But this time I’ve found my place. I might not be those other girls, but I am loved. I am kind. I am thoughtful. I am a cuckquean. And I am me.
Cuckquean posting on Tumblr usually focuses on the sexy aspects of cuckqueaning and keeps quiet about the rest. Who wants to hear about the times that things just don’t go so well? Can’t put ‘em under a dirty GIF, that’s for sure.
He fucks other girls, yes. All the time, and I see it.
Today, on my way to put his dick in my mouth, I spotted a hair tie on the bedside table and was super not okay with it. Like picked it up in disgust with the tips of two fingers and showed it to him, an accusing look in my eyes.
“You want snaps of me fucking other girls, but a hair tie makes you mad?”
I handed it to him and, as he threw it into a drawer, I put his dick in my mouth.
Why?! Why was I weird? Makes NO sense.
But none of this makes sense so who knows.
2012, first time my boyfriend actually fucked his lover at our apartment while I was politely away to give them privacy. I come back and find the perfume he had used to refresh himself after the intercourse, a perfume he had actually never used and that he had put on simply because it was the closest at hand. I remember not saying anything, just grabbing it and then throwing it away.
We can project our repressed feelings in weird ways and on weird, innocent objects ;D
