#dazaiosamu
Dazai: Let’s do ‘get help’.
Chuuya:No.
Dazai: C’mon, you love it.
Chuuya: I hate it. It’s humiliating!
Dazai: We’re doing it.
Chuuya: We are NOT doing ‘get help’.
*5 min later*
Dazai, carrying Chuuya:Get help! My friend is dying! Help him!
*flings Chuuya at the enemy*
Chuuya:*chokes on his food*
Kouyou: Drink up Chuuya-kun
Dazai: Don’t let her tell you what to do
Kouyou: Excuse me?
*Kouyou and Dazai starts arguing*
Chuuya, smacking his chest:So who’s gonna give me a heimlich maneuver
Chuuya, jokingly: How’s the cutest traitor doing today?
Dazai, without looking up: I don’t know how are you?
Chuuya:
Chuuya:Wh—
Dazai, snapping his head up:Join the agency Chuuya
15 SKK
Dazai: Have my plans ever been wrong?
Chuuya, mimicking in a high pitched voice: Have my plans ever been wrong?
Dazai:
Chuuya:
Chuuya:*Traps a wasp under a cup*
Dazai:*Walks over and places two more cups*
Chuuya: Please no-
Dazai:*Starts shuffling the cups*
Waiter: Sorry sir, your card has been declined
Dazai: Just try again?
Waiter: I’ve already tried 3 times…
Chuuya: It’s fine, i’ll take care of it
Chuuya:*grabs the waiter by the collar*
Chuuya: He said TRY AGAIN
Chuuya:Reminder that I’m very sweet and endearing so be nice to me.
Dazai:Or what?
Chuuya:I’ll punch your lights out.
Dazai: Name one mean thing that I’ve ever done.
Chuuya: You tried to convince me that eggs weren’t real.
Dazai: I’m going to write a book
Chuuya: Cool, what’s it gonna be about?
Dazai: How to be cute: a guide by Osamu Dazai.
- Be Osamu Dazai
Dazai: I’m tired.
Chuuya: Where are you?
Dazai: In my apartment.
Chuuya: Go to your window.
Dazai: I’m here.
Chuuya:Jump.
Chuuya: We’re done.
Dazai:K.
Chuuya: Don’t use K on me.
Dazai:Oay.
Chuuya: You look nice, I want to kiss you
Dazai: What?
Chuuya, panicking: I SAID IF YOU DIED I WOULDN’T MISS YOU!
Dazai: We can go to the cinema if i’m allowed.
Chuuya: If you’re allowed?
Dazai: You’re not usually allowed to bring snacks into the cinema-
Dazai: I may not have been completely honest about that…
Chuuya: You? Less than truthful? I’m shocked, Dazai. Shocked and horrified.
Dazai, stroking Chuuya’s hair: You’re so cute.
Chuuya, sleepily: I could beat the shit out of you.
Dazai, lovingly: I know.
Dazai:It’s really muggy outside, isn’t it?
Chuuya: If I look out the window and see all the mugs on the lawn, I will murder you.
Dazai, sipping coffee from a bowl: …
Chuuya: i wanted to kiss you today
Dazai, leaning closer: why didn’t you?
Chuuya, pouting: i couldn’t reach your face
Chuuya, walking into the kitchen: is something burning?
Dazai, seductively leaning against the counter: just my desire for you~
Chuuya: dazai, the toaster’s on fire–
Mori: let’s play fuck, marry, kill
Chuuya: kill dazai
Mori: it hasn’t even starte—
Chuuya: kill. dazai.
Dazai: *trips and falls*
Dazai: fuck i wasn’t ready!!
Chuuya: neither was i when you left the port mafia the night odasaku died with no words at all. but go off i guess-
