#dc arsenal

Red Hood and The Outlaws.

roy and lian, G+, 1.1k | based on this tiktok and basically copied verbatim loool. just a fun time between roy and lian

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Roy pulls his phone out of his pocket, setting it up so he can film himself with one hand. Possibilities of sharing this video with others aside, he just wants to make sure this is actually happening. He frames it so he’s the only one on screen, capturing him sitting on the living room sofa. Just out of frame but within range of the mic is Lian sitting next to him.

“Can you ask me again what you just asked me?” he says. “What was that question?”

She looks up at him with her big brown eyes, obviously confused.

“I don’t think—Daddy didn’t hear you,” he clarifies.

Lian cocks her head to the side, beginning to pick at her shirt, seemingly already bored with this conversation.

But Roy needs to know he heard this right, and he needs it documented.

She looks up from her shirt, turning to look at Roy again. When she finally answers, her tone indicates a mix of confusion and annoyance at her dad’s apparent incompetence.

“Can we have lesbian?”

Roy tucks his lips into his mouth, trying his absolute hardest not to burst out laughing.

Just five minutes ago, they were watching a Pixar film in the living room when Lian had asked a simple question: What’s for dinner? When Roy said he hadn’t decided yet, she’d promptly answered, “Can we have lesbian?”

So, he immediately paused the movie and brought out his phone to film and capture this very moment.

Roy hums a noise of acknowledgement. “Mhm, okay.” He strokes his jaw with his free hand, a poor attempt at trying to cover up the smile threatening to split his face. “Maybe I did hear you right.” He moves the hand on his chin to brush his cheek.

He has no idea what the fuck she’s talking about. Where did she hear that word? What does it have to do with dinner? Is Lian trying to come out to him? How would he even get a lesbian (question mark?) for her?

(He briefly wonders if Dick or Jason are in touch with Batwoman. She’s a lesbian, right? Roy vaguely remembers something about an engagement.)

Lian looks at him expectantly, the corner of her lips tugging into the tiniest frown. Crap, he needs to wrap up this up soon if he wants to avoid a tantrum.

He decides to be honest.

“I don’t know—I don’t know what that is, sweetie,” he admits. He props his free arm onto the backrest of the couch, leaning his head against a fist. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Lesbiaaan,” Lian drawls, as if Roy didn’t hear her say it three times with total clarity now.

He hides his face behind his hand again, unable to stop the grin from growing. He smoothly (as smooth as he can in a situation like this anyway) turns the movement to look like he’s just rubbing his eyes.

“I kn-I know,” he stutters. Shit, he can barely contain himself now.

He takes a shallow breath. “I know what you said,” he tries again, “but I don’t think that word means what you think it means, okay?”

He’s about to explain himself a little more when Lian interrupts him:

“It’s like spaghetti!”

Roy nearly drops his phone.

Lasagna.

She means lasagna.

Lian looks at him with an expression that only says duh! and Roy can’t stop the snort that escapes him. He covers his face again in a last-ditch effort—he never wants his daughter to think he’s laughing at her but, god, he definitely underestimated how raising a kid had its moments.

He clears his throat, getting a better grip of his phone. “Ahem, excuse me. Um.”

Perceptive little girl she is, Lian’s frown turns into one of concern, so Roy answers her before she can divert the conversation.

“Lian, baby,” he says, deciding to completely give up on hiding his smile, “do you mean ‘lasagna’?”

“Yup!” she replies, popping at the P at the end.

Lian smiles back at him, apparently glad that they’re finally on the same page. Roy rubs his forehead again after nodding.

“Yeah,” he says, “I’m sure we can hav—”

His voice suddenly cracks, giggles threatening to pour out of him. He pauses to collect himself, breathing deeply as he rubs his forehead some more.

He needs to get a hold of himself. She’s been patient with him this whole time, and he still needs to figure out dinner after all.

“I’m sure we can have lasagna really soon,” he assures her. “Okay? I’ll try to—” and he can’t help but nod at her encouragingly when her expression turns into one of excitement, “—I’ll try to make sure we can eat that soon, okay?”

Lian makes a happy noise, lifting a hand up to pat him on the chest.

“Yeah!” she exclaims, beaming a huge gap-toothed grin at him, and Roy practically melts.

“Okay, alright,” he says, voice going from slightly hysterical to overwhelmingly fond. He ends the recording before shutting his phone off and putting it away.

Lian faceplants into his chest—getting an oof! out of him in the process—and she shifts around until her little arms are curled around his torso, face tilted up.

(Roy doesn’t care what anyone says—he’s definitely got the cutest kid in the world, probably the galaxy. This is not the first time he’s thought this, and it certainly won’t be the last.)

“So can we have liz…” She struggles with the word. “Laz-laznia—”

“Lasagna.”

“—lasagna. Can we have that today?”

Thinking about what’s in their kitchen, Roy shakes his head. “No, princess, I’m sorry, not tonight.”

“Aww,” she whines, burying her face into his chest. He brings up a hand to stroke her hair—it’s getting long now, several inches past her shoulders, and he makes a mental note about maybe taking her in for a haircut.

Roy hums to himself. There are some leftovers he can probably toss into some sort of meal for tonight, but his little girl wants lasagna. Lasagna can’t be that hard to make, right? Maybe Ollie or Dinah (or Jason?) has a recipe even Roy can manage.

And if all else fails, he’s been on enough late-night missions to know that pre-packaged frozen lasagna isn’t half-bad.

“We can’t have it tonight,” he says, “but maybe after we go shopping this week, we can have some, okay?”

“Yay!” she cheers, looking up to flash that megawatt grin at him again.

He grins back, eyes crinkling at the corners. “You wanna help me make that next time?”

He offers a raised palm to her, and she responds with a delighted squeal, high-fiving him with a satisfying smack!

“Okay, Daddy!”