i mean i guess i knew that because there was a girl in middle school who said that genes didn’t really exist, and DNA was like dinosaur bones (a false flag to make us doubt god’s will). i’m pretty sure she grew out of it.
“Soviet scientists who refused to renounce genetics were dismissed from their posts and left destitute. Hundreds if not thousands of others were imprisoned. Several were sentenced to death as enemies of the state, including the botanist Nikolai Vavilov. Lysenko’s ideas and practices contributed to the famines that killed millions of Soviet people; the adoption of his methods from 1958 in the People’s Republic of China had similarly calamitous results, culminating in the Great Chinese Famine of 1959 to 1962.”
Holy shit, a form of science denialism i didn’t know about before…
Michael and his family were staunch anti maskers, with his parents writing to the school board claiming that making their son wear a mask would violate his religious freedom as it hides the smile that god gave him.
Not wanting to violate religious freedom the Principal agreed to the logic, however, of course ALL clothing would go against this belief, as such everything God gave Michael will be seen by all.
Poor Michael’s going to have some very red cheeks by the time his ordeal is over. He was hoping his parents would reverse course on this, but they’re too stubborn to admit they’re wrong. He’ll be butt naked until they lift the mask mandate…
Wyatt had been walking home from the gym late in the evening when he was jumped by a couple of muggers. He didn’t have any cash on him, so the thieves settled for taking his clothes - all of his clothes.
Now Wyatt found himself miles from home, skulking in the shadows butt naked. He kept one hand glued to his junk, praying no one would see him as he made his way across town.
Next time he went to the gym, he’d definitely drive…
The guys had wanted to make their game of golf interesting. $10 a hole, they’d said. Unfortunately for Bryce, he only had a $20 bill on him, and he was having terrible luck.
No matter, the guys said - you can just bet with your clothes. Bryce thought his luck would turn around, so he agreed.
Now it was the 13th hole, and Bryce was down to his tighty-whities. If he lost one more hole, he’d have to finish the round butt naked. And, unfortunately for Bryce, his drive just went right into the water.
The folks at the pro shop were going to have a field day with this…
This Valentine’s day was probably his most humiliating day ever. Earlier that day, he wanted to do a grand romantic surprise for this girl he had only started flirting with in class, so he snuck into her dorm room and artfully scattered rose petals and lit candles all over. For the pièce de résistance, he stripped naked and laid on her bed, carefully putting a rose over his dick.
He waited in that position until she finally returned home, with her boyfriend. She was shocked to find the guy she had just met only a few weeks ago completely naked on her bed covered in roses. Realizing his misunderstanding, he stood in shock as the boyfriend chased him out of the room. He wouldn’t get a chance to explain himself before they threw him out, still completely in the nude. He would have to run through the campus with his ass in full display before the cops finally catch him. After a naked image of him holding a rose to his junk spread throughout the campus, he would forever be known as the “flower boy” and would live with that humiliating incident for the rest of his university life.
Adrian approached the front desk, one hand glued to his junk as people around him stopped and stared. He’d just finished his post-workout shower when his so-called friends pushed him out of the locker room sans towel. Now he was giving the whole gym a free peek at his hard work… and his friends were blocking the door to keep him from getting back in.
And so Adrian had no choice but to sheepishly go to the front desk and ask for a towel. Unfortunately, the gym recently instituted a “one towel” policy to cut costs… Adrian will have to wait. Hopefully his friends let him back in soon…
A test case at a local highschool requiring jocks to compete naked saw a huge spike in attendance and sponsorship deals for the school. As such he decided to run on a campaign of expanding the program.
At first our young athlete was fine with the promotion. After all, he assumed he’d be compensated and was told he’d be shot from the waist up. Turns out his parents got the money instead, and they signed a waiver allowing the school to show… everything.
The Harble family game night took an unexpected turn when the new Catan expansion board game rules said quite clearly each time a 7 is rolled “in addition to moving the robber, any player who’s name is Nick must also be robbed of 1 item of clothing”.
He objected this was unfair but his parents were adamnt that rules are rules.
Other popular games in the series included a version of Monopoly where you had to sell your clothes to pay debts, a version of risk where the defeated player was enslaved, and a version of Clue where the ultimate criminal was locked up (comes with a free chastity belt!).
He’d stepped out that morning for a bit of fresh air. It was a beautiful day, and it was early enough that he knew no one else would be awake, so he didn’t bother to get dressed. Everything was fine until the wind blew the door shut behind him.
“Shit!” he thought as he realized he was locked out in his tighty-whities.
Fortunately, he had his cell on him. He texted his girlfriend, begging her to swing by with her spare key to let him in. Unfortunately, she had just started her 8-hour shift. He was going to have to wait…
“This is ridiculus,” James thought as he worked the leg press. “Can’t believe Coach is making me do this!”
James was the star running back for the varsity football team. He had a full-ride scholarship lined up with the top school in the state. And here he was going through his stupid gym class butt naked because he forgot his gym uniform.
Normally he would’ve just gone through class in his boxers, but today of all days he’d chosen to go commando. Just his luck.
Now everyone in his class was laughing at him as he moved from machine to machine. James told himself that they were just envious of his perfect body. In the back of his mind, though,he knew he’d spend the rest of his senior year being known as the Naked Guy.
These boys were taking advantage of the beautiful, hot summer day and going for a dip at the creek. It was an impromptu trip, so none of them brought swim trunks. No matter - they could skinny-dip and dry out in the sun.
All went well until they climbed out of the water to get dressed, only to find their clothes were gone. Apparently their little swimming spot wasn’t as secluded as they thought.
Now the boys are coming to the horrible realization that they’ll have to walk all the way home naked. And while the creek may have been quiet, the road they’d walked down to get there certainly wasn’t…
“Guys! Get back here! Don’t leave me here like this!”
The truth was Paul had this coming. He’d left the frat house a mess several times. He’d mooched off of the other guys’ beer. He’d hit on their girlfriends. Enough was enough.
So, they dragged Paul out of bed in his tighty-whities, drove him to the other side of campus, and tossed him out. He tried chasing the car down, but the guys refused to stop.
Paul would have to suffer the humiliation of walking all the way back to the frat house in his underwear. Maybe now he’ll learn to treat his brothers with respect…
How could he have been so stupid? Steve had been jogging the same route all year before work and had never seen a soul. When he’d leave it would be pitch black out, and the sun would only just start to rise by the time he’d return.
So, feeling a bit daring, our embarrassed hero decided to go for his morning run butt naked. After all, he never once saw a soul.
Unfortunately for him, Steve forgot about the time change. When he got about halfway through his run, he noticed the sun coming up. He turned around and started running home, but heard cars - he could even see them! With nothing else to do, he stood against the wall in the park, trying to think of a way out of this mess. Preferably one that didn’t end with half the town seeing him naked… or getting arrested.
With the gym closed for cleaning, the boys had to get their sports physicals out in the main hallway. To their chagrin, that meant undressing to their underwear and lining up in full view of several classrooms. They stood there awkwardly, trying to ignore their fully-clothed peers watching through the windows (especially the girls secretly recording them with their cellphones).
It only got worse when they got to the front of the line and the nurse asked them to take off their underwear. There wasn’t even a curtain! Every boy realized with dread that they’d be seen completely naked by their classmates… and there was nothing they could do about it.
Christopher had always fancied himself the ladies’ man, and certainly thought himself the hottest guy in the school orchestra. He obviously never heard the rumors that his string bass was compensated for something.
Well, today those rumors were confirmed when Christopher hit on the wrong girl on the way back from an orchestra competition. Her jealous boyfriend was pissed. Before Christopher knew what was happening, he was stripped of his suit, all the way down to his skivvies. The bus driver pulled over to get control over the students, at which point Christopher was tossed out of the bus butt naked, along with his bass.
The other musicians cheered as the bus pulled away, leaving Christopher stranded in his birthday suit. He’d have to carry his bass all the way home, with nothing to cover up the fact that he was, indeed, compensating for something…
When Jack moved back home it was on the condition he take the first job available. A local grill offered him a job as a server, but he had to pose for a staff photo. Told his uniforrm would be photoshopped on after they took it of him nude.
To his shock and horror his naked photo ended up in their advertising campaign. It turned out his uniform would just be a pair of socks. To make matters worse he wasn’t allowed to quit, it would be an interesting first shift
Jack’s parents told him they’d change the locks on him if he quit the only job he’d had in months. It didn’t matter that they were making him work butt naked - it was his own fault for dropping out of college without getting any marketable skills.
At least Jack’s parents were somewhat supportive… they did come by the Peachy Grill that Friday with the whole family to see their son in action!
With the gyms shut down due to COVID, Charlie here decided to start biking everywhere to stay in shape. Just when he was starting to feel confident about his body again (having burned off some quarantine pounds), it happened. While biking home from work, he was jumped by a few muggers.
Charlie knew he should have been more careful. He’d heard about an increase in crime with the rise in unemployment. He just didn’t think it would happen to him.
The muggers were thorough. They took his wallet, his keys, and were going to take his bike when Charlie begged them not to. The muggers agreed - they’d leave the bike, but they were taking his clothes.
That’s how Charlie ended up naked miles from his home. Even though he lived in a remote area, he knew he’d be seen by dozens of people as he pumped the pedals in the buff.
Matt really wanted to fit in with the cool kids in the online game Brawling Ultimate Machines. He kept losing because he didn’t have the right weapons and his outfits was only the default skin.
One day when his dad was out he took his credit card and used that knowing he wouldn’t notice a few small purchases. The first box was nothing; the second was nothing, next thing he knew he’d spend over $600.
Enraged his father called up, and learned this could not be refunded. Since Matt had used his dads money to buy such cool clothes in the game, it seemed fitting he wear his ‘default’ skin in real life.
Matt would be allowed to wear clothes again only after he repaid his dad the $600. Selling all of his clothes and his gaming system only netted him $200. It was going to be a long couple of months mowing lawns in his birthday suit to make up that difference…
Richie was a young, rising pop star just about to make it big. Just as he was about to release his first album, though, he had a little trouble with the law. Since he was in the country on a visa, the government threatened to kick him out of the country just before the start of his album tour.
“Please, you can’t do that! It was an honest mistake!”
The authorities weren’t having it. They decided that they could work out a compromise, though - Richie could stay in the country, but he would be punished under the newly instituted “No Unifrom Disciplinary Experiment.”
Long story short, as long as Richie was in the country, he would be naked. He was shocked by the idea. His record label thought it was a great way to get some free publicity.
When word broke that the young pop star would be performing butt naked, the concerts sold out, and Richie was booked for several high-profile magazine shoots - including Rolling Stone.
The worst part of it all is that Richie wouldn’t see a dime of his earnings until the promoters, lawyers, and record executives were all paid. It was going to be a long, humiliating tour…
