#hold your applause people

in honor of my most popular post on this site I will be revealing my personal (and correct) headcanon of the breakfast club:

• Allie went back to her old style and ran away to the the city to work in a gay disco club where she discovered her lesbianism
• Andy was still in love with her and followed her, figured out quickly after she was a trans woman and then picked up drag because of her athletic physique thanks to all the wrestling
• they are now lesbian lovers and rob banks together occasionally
• Claire moved in with her stoner brother while going to beauty school to open her own nail salon and married Bender eventually
• Bender is a stay at home husband, cooking, cleaning, everything for his wife, he occasionally fosters kids in need
• Brian rekindles with Claire and Bender after going to college to become a teacher, where he joins them in a poly relationship, yes Claire pegs them both
• he becomes a teacher at Shermer High where he implements classes to help spot and call out abuse of family members
• they all go to therapy
• they all stay best friends
• none of them have kids