sizzle it up with the twins! !! Lots of gossip to catch up
[image: an illustration of Taako and Lup as they stand behind a counter, preparing food. They have light brown skin and blonde hair. Lup is leaning forward to read a cookbook as she stirs a bowl of something. Her hair is pulled back with a red headband and she’s wearing a tanktop that says “aw yeah bitches.” Taako is cutting vegetables and checking out a pot of something cooking. His long hair is braided and he’s wearing a green bandanna and a tshirt that says: “Y’all still straight? …in this economy?” There are lots of speech bubbles between them consisting of emojis, mostly skulls with red hoods, scythes, hearts, and flames.]
magnus: hey taako lets rush into this super cool and probably dangerous area that could possibly get us killed!!
taako:
[image: a drawing of Taako, an elf with dark brown skin and curly black hair. He’s wearing a pink wizard’s hat and a black tshirt that reads: “I would prefer not to.” His hands are raised slightly and he has an uncomfortable grimace on his face.]
[ID: The galaxy brain meme in three panels. The first text box says, “Universal standard time so don’t have to go to work in the dark.” The second text says, “Universal DST so people don’t have to leave work in the dark.” The final text reads, “Shorten the working day so everyone can have daylight before and after work.” End ID.]
[a passage from a book. underlined portions indicated in bold, italics preserved. ID: …he said in Greek: ‘Kai su, teknon’ (which Shakespeare turned into the Latin ‘Et tu, Brute?’). It literally means ‘You too, child,’ but what Caesar may have intended by the words isn’t clear. Tempest cites ‘an important article’ by James Russell (1980) ‘that has often been overlooked’. Russell points out that the words kai su often appear on curse tablets, and suggests that Caesar’s putative last words were not ‘the emotional parting declaration of a betrayed man to one he had treated like a son’ but more along the lines of ‘See you in hell, punk.’ end ID.]
I wanted to give my rainbow tiefling an adventurer’s outfit, familiar, and a name.
[Image Description: A digital illustration of a tiefling in a three quarters pose wearing dirty brown adventuring gear and holding three books in her arms. She has black hair, red eyes, opalescent upright horns, and purple skin with pink, orange, yellow, green, and blue patches that make her look rainbow. Next to her is a brown and cream tressym (a winged cat creature) named Papyrus. Words around the figure describe her. Name: Enfys Cyrntywyll. Pronouns: she they. Ancestry: tiefling. Occupation: librarian, adventurer. Hobbies: Collecting books from around the world. Favorite color: brown. Favorite spell: comprehend languages. Weakness: nightmares, stealth, and disguises. Strength: Investigation, sleight of hand. They are labeled wizard/rogue.]
[Image description: Three digital drawings of the same rainbow tiefling in the same 3-quarters pose. She’s standing tall, slightly on tiptoes, one hand free, the other holding three books. Her main color is purple while pink, orange, yellow, green, and blue swirl around her skin. Her long, upright, slightly curved horns are equally rainbow but more pastel and iridescent. The left most figure is naked, with clouds censoring NSFW bits, the middle figure wears a semi-sheer ruffled beige dress with a brown stay and brown low-heel boots. She has a bow around her tail. The third and final figure wears a cream tunic tucked into pleated brown pants. She also wears an embroidered brown vest and the same brown shoes as with the dress. /end image description]
1: An American-cheese-yellow food truck trailer with black text covering it.
The service window has large text under it reading:
$1 GRILLED CHEESE
NO CHANGE GIVEN, SORT OUT YOUR OWN SHIT.
To the left is a menu that reads:
MENU
GRILLED CHEESE - $1
THAT’S ENOUGH.
IF YOU NEED A DRINK GO TO A PLACE THAT SELLS DRINKS.
To the right is another notice that reads:
CASH ONLY
I DON’T HAVE VENMO BECAUSE I’M NOT SOME TEENAGE ASSHOLE WHO VAPES
The side of the trailer facing the truck has a warning on it that reads:
DANGER
$1 GRILLED CHEESE
DON’T ASK FOR A GODDAMNED TOMATO SLICE OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL REACH THROUGH THE WINDOW, PULL YOU INSIDE AND HOLD YOUR HEAD AGAINST THE GRIDDLE, WHICH WILL BE EMBARRASSING FOR YOU
2:A view of the other side of the trailer with what appears to be a service window. It has black text that reads:
THIS SIDE OF TRUCK IS NOT FOR CUSTOMERS. DO NOT APPROACH.
THIS WINDOWS IS FOR ME TO THOUSAND YARD STARE OUT OF EVERYTIME SOMEONE TELLS ME THEY “LIKE MY IDEA” BUT THAT I COULD MAKE “MORE MONEY” IF I CHARGED $2 OR $3. YES CAROL, I KNOW HOW MONEY WORKS. THE WINDOWS IS AIMED AT A NEARBY MEADOW WHERE A FAMILY OF DEER OFTEN GATHER AND ONE TIME I SAW AN OWL SO I’M HOLDING OUT HOPE I GET TO SEE THE OWL AGAIN. WHEN I"M READY TO GET BACK TO SELLING YOU UTILITARIAN EATS AT ROCK BOTTOM PRICES FOR MY OWN AMUSEMENT I WILL LET YOU KNOW. DO NOT ASK ME HOW LONG I WILL BE, IT’LL JUST MAKE ME STARE LONGER
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ABOUT FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS, THEN OK.
my post-art plan is opening a grilled cheese cart. it will serve $1 grilled cheese made with white bread, bulk cheese, bulk butter, and that’s it. greasy as hell. no options, no artisan, nothing. there will be no change. you give me $5 you’re getting 5, you figure your own life out.
the business and cart will be called “$1 GRILLED CHEESE”, with not a lick of irony or cleverness. it will be in IMPACT font, black on cheese yellow. i will decimate every other food truck or food cart out there.
it’s 1AM, you’re stumbling out of the bar or show. what do you want? do you want to wait outside some asinine truck for a $12 deconstructed grilled cheese with avacado relish that takes 20 goddamned minutes? or do you want 5 no bullshit grilled cheeses stacked in wax paper for $5?
it’s like a 10% cost of product when you aim low as i will aim quality wise and a bit in upsell because, once again, i do not give change. money goes into a slot and that’s that. figure your shit out.
also my cart will have a boombox cranking doo-wop classics.
“but are they going to be good?”
they’re going to be exactly like the zillion grilled cheeses your somewhat absentee parents made for you as a kid so yeah, you’re probably gonna have a lot of feelings about them good and bad. i will use a lot of butter, i’ll say that much.
you get a free grilled cheese if you give us a one star yelp review that says there’s no tomato slices and we refuse to give change so you ended up with 20 grilled cheeses because you had just hit up the ATM.
“but what if you offered…”
no.
i think the company slogan will be “get your wallets out but don’t get your hopes up”
okay, finished the trailer design
[Embedded image: The same as the first image in this post. End embedded image.]
Tweet thread resumes:
i’d like to introduce our mascot, he’s an over educated twenty something struggling to pay off his student loans and will never be able to afford a house so he’ll be stuck in the rental cycle until his second wife, who has a good job, who currently wears a sandwich costume for money
[Embedded Image: A stock photo of an overly enthusiastic man giving two thumbs up. The photo is edited to make it look like he’s wearing a giant grilled cheese costume that reads: IF YOU WANT A TOMATO SLICE BRING YOUR OWN AND PUT IT IN YOURSELF I’M NOT ABOUT THAT LIFE. End embedded image.]
Tweet thread resumes:
on an unrelated side note, did you all know you can just slather mayo in place of butter with grilled cheese and it’s pretty good because it’s just sort of a flavored oil? you know, if the darkness inside takes you to that place.
Worst part about this is someone named Chad is gonna steal this idea and they’ll make a lame logo with an axe crisscrossing a spatula and then they’ll start a kickstarter for a $80000 truck and the moment someone is like “you should add hemp mustard” they will cave…
Giving people any choices slows everything down; the line, wait time, prep time, getting people the correct order, everything. I want the currency in your wallet to be the only variant once you’re in line. My model is “One thing, done just ok, but dirt cheap so you don’t care.”
Crushing it.
[Embedded Image: A photo of two grilled cheese sandwiches cooking on a skillet. End embedded image.]
Tweet thread resumes:
okay a few thoughts…
1. according to the comments i will have my $1 grilled cheese truck and next to my truck will be roughly 400 $1 tomato soup trucks trying to leech off me. the whole place is gonna smell goddamned terrible, the air literally humid with tomato, so please don’t
3. to all those who have asked about franchising, all potential franchisees will require an internship first. it’s a decent amount of yardwork. it’s mostly yardwork. it’s yardwork.
[ID: A page with 2 digital drawings of TinaKitten. Tina is a person with light skin, brown eyes, and long brown hair that reaches her waist. On the left side of the page is a drawing of her from the shoulders up. She has her hands out in front of her, holding blob dream, a small white being with a round head, cylindrical body, and a smiling face. Tina has head head tilted to the left and is smiling slightly. She is wearing a white shirt and a top with purple straps. On the background to the left is a simplistic carrot pattern. On the right side of the page is a a drawing of Tina in a dynamic pose, leaping down to the right while holding a large gold sword. He hands are reaching back behind her head, holding the hilt of the sword, and it blocks all of her face except her eyes. Tina is wearing a black long sleeve shirt, a short purple dress with spaghetti straps, black shorts, knee high black socks, a belt with two eyes of ender, a purple bow and a carrot clip in her hair, and white cat ears. Behind this drawing, there is all caps purple text that reads “tina kitten.” /End ID]
[ID: a colored digital line drawing of cudi di batterino, a fat muscular japanese-argentinian butch woman with a single above-knee amputation. his greying hair is pulled back in a bun, and he has a lip piercing and two cartilage piercings on one ear. his left shoulder and right arm are partially colored with mottled blue, and the underside of that arm has a slight pattern resembling that of squid suckers. he sits on the ground and crosses his arms as he looks towards the viewer out of the corner of his eye. /End ID]
[image description: all of the pictures are digitally drawn uncolored portraits of blaseball players on light gray backgrounds. in order of appearance:
wanda schenn, a German person in an old astronaut helmet and an unzipped flight suit with the sleeves rolled up. on one shoulder, wanda has a fire diamond, and on her breast, she has a tacos insignia. they float in a relaxed position, as if in a zero gravity environment, and listen to music through earbuds attached to a discman. her helmet reflects fields under a night sky.
lou roseheart, a muscular Arab woman with long hair in a high ponytail and a racerback sleeveless shirt. she faces away from the viewer, her head turned to profile view, and she grins as she holds one hand to the back of her neck.
justice spoon, a Hmong statue with short fluffy hair. one side of their mouth quirks up into a small smile, they wear a blindfold and a button-up shirt under an open coat, and her face and hands have cracks running through.
robby hicks, a Salvadoran person with long hair and a mask-like canine skull and ears. she wears a crabs uniform and a backwards cap, and loop one thumb through a belt loop as they hold a bat over his other shoulder.
nagomi nava, a Japanese woman with short hair and a croptop over a long-sleeve shirt. the passenger, a shadowy octopus-like figure covered in eyes, emerges from one side of her face. she stands with her side to the viewer and looks towards us with a close-lipped smile. /end description]
[image description: A digital drawing of the Chicago Firefighters from the game Blaseball. Three players are seated on a bench. From left to right, Joshua Butt is talking to Rivers Rosa as they hold Socks Maybe in their arms. Rivers has her arms crossed as she sits in the middle of the bench. Lou Roseheart is sitting on her left, faced away from the rest of the crowd as she calls for someone offscreen. Peanut Holloway is behind her, wearing a red baseball cap and turned towards Edric Tosser, who is talking to Justice Spoon in the background. Caleb Alvarado stands in front of both Spoon and Edric, behind the bench as he reaches over to pet Socks Maybe on the head. Isaac Johnson is faced towards Caleb as he comes into the room with baseball bats in a bag he slung across his back. /end image description]
[Image description: A digital drawing of Edric Tosser from the game Blaseball. Edric’s back is shown as he looks over his shoulder. They have multiple patches, pins, and studs on their jacket. His hair is dyed red and styled up with the sides shaved. Edric also has multiple piercings on his face and ears. /end image description]
[image description: A digital drawing of Adalberto Tosser and Brock Forbes. Adalberto is kissing Brock on the cheek with one arm around Brock’s shoulders and the other at the waist. Tosser is wearing a yellow tank top with multicolored striped shorts belted high up the waist and grey-blue boots. Brock is wearing a red and dark grey shirt with dark blue jeans and chunky pink sneakers. Flowers are growing out of the left side of Brock’s face. Forbes is holding Tosser’s prosthetic arm in both hands as they embrace each other. /end image description]
drew brockbertie for @stainedglassgoblin, which was a lot of fun! These are based on its designs
[Image description: Two digital drawings of Whit Steakknife and Justice Spoon from the game Blaseball. The first image depicts only Whit, as a person with a human head versus a knife object head. Whit’s hair is cropped short and has a silver-colored scar tissue around the left eye and into the hairline, as well as down the neck. The second image depicts White and Spoon. Spoon is not wearing the Justice blindfold and Whit has a knife for a head. Spoon is holding Whit around the middle from behind, leaning their head on his shoulder. /end image description]
I was messing around with an idea, so here’s some sketches
[Image description: Art of Agnes Montague from The Magnus Archives. She is pale, freckled, with long bronze hair, orange eyes, soot covered fingertips, and wears an orange vest top and brown skirt. There is a small bronze bracelet with a flame charm on her right wrist. She has her left hand lifting her skirt at the side, and the right hand is above her head, with flames trailing from her fingers. She is staring up at the flames wistfully. Image description end] Post link
A re-do of my D-LE foreshortening drawing from May. Includes lineart.
[ID: The first drawing contains a humanoid robot looking right of him with the perspective coming from the top looking down. The robot contain Blue LEDs and has a grey chrome & black matte body parts. The second drawing has the same humanoid robot with the same pose and perspective, but contains no colours.]
[Image Description: A digital drawing of Tadpole from the Warrior Cats books. Tadpole is a black kitten with blue eyes. His nose, insides of his ears, chest, and the sides of his tail are dark gray. The gray on his tail makes it look like a tadpole’s tail. Tadpole is sitting with his front right paw lifted. Above his tail “Tadpole” is written in blue. End Description.]
[Image Description: A digital drawing of Spiderleg from the Warrior Cats books. Spiderleg is a black-and-brown cat with a beard, orange eyes, dark brown eyebrows and a dark brown nose. His legs, muzzle, underbelly, and chest are brown. His tail tip, a patch above his nose and his inner ears are white. He is standing with his front left leg in front of his other legs. Above his back “Spiderleg” is written in orange. End Description.]
“I don’t envy you, Graystripe. Two kits are hard enough.”
Spiderleg is a long-limbed, black tom with a brown underbelly, and amber eyes.
oh by the way i’m having a draw this in your style contest thing on my instagram. how much of it is because i’m celebrating 100+ followers and how much of it is because i’ve had this idea for a drawing in my mind for a while and wanted an excuse to draw it? you decide
[id in alt, and here: A digital drawing of a blue cat and a smaller black and white cat. the blue cat has stars around them and is glowing.]
[Image Description: A digital drawing of Woodkit of RiverClan from the Warrior Cats book Leopardstar’s Honor. Woodkit is a gray tabby with dark blue eyes, a short tail, and a dark gray nose. His muzzle and underbelly are light gray, his tail and stripes are dark gray. Woodkit is laying down with his head on his paws. Above his back “Woodkit (rc)” is written in dark blue. End Description.]
