#nblw pride

What’s the point of having a queen-sized bed if I don’t have a Queen to share it with

Imagine experiencing life with them… waking up in each other’s arms, eating breakfast together, buying groceries together, watching the rain start to fall… I can’t wait for all those moments

Mentally, I’m lying in bed on a rainy day with a girl in my arms, listening to the soft pitter patter of the rains drops tapping the window while we cuddle.

I saw a picture of her today and was rammed, totally pummelled, by the full extent my gayness

I used to be afraid of the word bisexual.

I used to let the potential judgement of others dictate my confidence and self-worth. It was mostly the prefix because I didn’t understand what it meant at the time. It felt like a reminder of the fetishization of bisexuality and it put a dirty taste in my mouth. I figured it was better off to stay out of conversations about bisexuality in some communities and to just say bi in others. Bi is fine, but better off for who? I’m not doing it for my own convenience. I’m doing it because I am afraid of others, and that small bit of power that they held over me pissed me off.

I began saying bisexual and bisexuality more often than bi, then I tried to find more reasons to say it. Now, seeing people say bisexual fills me with pride and joy. It is a pride in overcoming a fear and becoming stronger than hatred. It is a joy that I feel the need to pass on. I hope every bisexual person can feel this way about their bisexuality some day, regardless of how similar or different their journey is from mine.

Our bisexuality is an integral part of us that is deserving of our acknowledgment and respect. All of our attractions—same and other gender attractions—are valid and important. They make us who we are.

Your bisexuality is beautiful. Your bisexuality is true. Your bisexuality is wholesome or sensual or sexy or all or none of these. Your bisexuality is yours. Your bisexuality is enough.

Your attraction to all genders does not negate your love for your partner

Your love for your partner does not negate your attraction to all genders

Uncomfortably Bisexual

In my experience, the best way to confront biphobia, including internalized biphobia, is by being as loudly bisexual as possible. I don’t think enough bisexuals realize how much pride affects how others treat us. The word “pride” is used a lot in LGBT vocabulary, but do we truly understand what it means to have pride?

Even just the word “bisexual” puts a dirty taste in some mouths. But only at first. You see, unfamiliarity is often the root of disgust, which is often the root of hatred.

I used to avoid using “bisexual” in favor of “bi” because something about it made me cringe. Saying it in public made me self-conscious of what others thought. I would anxiously shrink myself and say the word quietly to draw the least attention. I was thinking too much into it giving the biphobes what they wanted: fear. I shouldn’t have to falter at all about saying a word. More than a word, in fact.

An identity. A statement. A weapon.

For every biphobic comment I hear—regardless of from or to whom—I say the word to their face at least twice. I say it loudly. I articulate. I make sure that they hear it and that they get used to hearing it. I say it obnoxiously and uncomfortably often, because that’s the only way to make the word normal and comforting. Eventually, the word does not bring out such strong reactions or feelings from biphobes, or myself.