#not hp
I’m going on an official hiatus with this blog.
Ever since I discovered the HPRP community I fell in love with the idea of it being a safe place for everyone to express their art in forms of cosplay and roleplay and etc, and I was obsessed with all of it for a long while.
I met fun, talented, incredible people here, people I’m happy to have met and people who were always kind and nice to me. I met people I genuinely admire for their talent and wish all he best, always.
I also met people that think they’re really important and better than others just bc they have a pretty face and a few thousand of followers in a blog on the internet, and think that bc of that, they have the right to treat others like shit. It wasn’t only one, two or three times that some people in this so said “welcoming and safe” community were rude to me or didn’t even bother to answer me bc I obviously didn’t have a blog that was “famous enough” for them to waist their time or something like that (like? Calm down Beyoncé, people only hype you so much bc you’re pretty or rich enough to buy good things to RP with or North American/European or basically only white).
So let’s be honest and cut out the bullshit, there are tons of people in here that try to join in the RP community but are completely ignored by most of yall bc they just don’t fit in the physical features idealised by most of you. And, yes, there are a few “big” blogs whose owners are poc’s and/or don’t have as much resources to use to RP as the other big ones, but they’re not too many and clearly have to work way harder to have half as many attention as the usual ones.
I’ve had this blog and tried to make it work for about two years or so. I wanted it to be a fun place for me to escape reality a bit, like I saw it was for some of you. I actually didn’t have any kind of contact with most of the people that everybody knows and loves inside this community, and most of them are probably nice people, but after I’ve tried to reach a few of them (not gonna quote names, cuz if I did yall would just pretend it never happened just to keep hyping them) and was treated really badly I just lost the courage and the will to try to make friends with people I’ve always admired and wanted to be friends with in here. I felt, almost all the time, like I was invisible in here, and it was a bad feeling, considering how 99% of all those people are always posting and rebloging discourses about social inclusion and things like that.
Soooo, that’s why I’m putting this little babe on a hiatus indefinitely. Thanks for everyone who helped me with anything and were nice to me, and I hope if I come back in the future I’ll find more of these kind of people and less of those who have a superstar complex and think their content is worth shit when all they have to rely on is a basic look and the same amount of face expressions as the eye of Sauron.
Bye
I WANNA FINISH 2019 IN A NICE LOVING VIBE!
So I decided to post here one of the first and one of the last pics taken of myself this year, pictures where I feel good and pretty, to see how much I’ve changed this year, and I’ll invite my beautiful friends from tumblr to join me if they’d like!
@asklilyevanss@sparklyslytherin@owlswithfins@hillnerd pls join me
As a Brazilian I need to ask you how the hell do you live without Brazilian funk like what do yall do when you’re in need to shake your ass
All of a sudden two decades have passed and you still have not kissed anyone with tongue, or kissed anyone at all for that matter, or had a 3 AM conversation with someone who would rather look into your eyes for ten minutes straight than talk. You have never worn a lover’s sweater or “forgotten” it at home in your bedroom just so you would have an excuse to see them again. You have never even stood face-to-face with someone who makes your hands shake so hard it feels like they’re both having a separate anxiety attack.
This causes you much guilt and self-blame and sadness but above all, an overwhelming curiosity. Are you really thatugly,thatunwanted,thatuninteresting,that boring, that no one, absolutely no one, has ever looked at you like the only thing on earth?
The answer is no. The better answer is that someone out there, somewhere in the world, is “wondering what it’s like to meet someone like you,” and they have two decades worth of love stored in their veins like a shoot-‘em-up drug, and they’re just about ready to inject it into someone else’s bloodstream. All you have to do is roll up your sleeves and wait for it to happen.
At times you felt so lonely you could stand at the edge of a cliff with nothing beneath you but air and grass and a long, long way down, and you’d still feel emptier than that canyon itself. Maybe you even danced with yourself alone in your room a few times, arms outstretched around a ghost, pretending someone else’s hands were on your waist, someone else’s eyes boring into yours.
Or maybe you fell temporarily in love with strangers on public transportation, fell in love with anybody who so much as accidentally brushed your hand on the way past. For you, falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return. But people are not eggs and falling in love with a dozen of them does not mean your shell will remain uncracked. One day you’re going to hit the point where you’re so desperate for human contact that you’re going to snap in half and all your love will bleed out like egg yolk.
But someone out there is eating a bowl of Ramen noodles right now, or putting on slippers, or settling into bed. They are doing all the normal things that you’ve done in your own life. They are just like you. They have cellulite and extra fat in all the wrong places and goals and fears and doubts and bad handwriting.
The truth is that they are just like you, and being just like you, they’re looking for a lover too. They’re what you might call a soulmate.
They think they’re all alone in feeling the way they do, but you’re really both two halves of a whole.
And one day you’ll meet them, bump into them on the street, and your two halves will be put together, and you’ll make one.
I read this every month to remind myself to latch onto a small ray of hope that this comes true.
hello ! i jumped on the uquiz trend and made one myself:how do you feel when you’re in love? i guess it’s mostly for fun but i did really try to think it through!
Trying to find the perfect name for a character, but you only have a vague idea of what you want, like “he feels like a 2-syllable kind of guy” or “It need a hard consonant at the end.”
May I recommend nameberry.com? I’ve sung its praises before, but you can search for specific lists of like “three syllable girls names” or “names ending in a.” You can also input names with a similar vibe to what you want and it’ll give you suggestions.
I have been looking for this site since I first started plotting out my novel, god bless you
I also like behindthename.com there you can filter too!
when anti-akechi people are upset in the comments that akechi is alive and will join the team
I want a goro stans only discord I know there’s a few but PLEASW
following up ANYONE WHO LOVES GORO LET ONE OF US KNOW!!!
this just in if your feminism doesn’t include fat people, especially fat people with diabetes or another medical condition and/or ‘infinifat’ folks who are over size 4X, it isn’t feminism and i don’t want it anywhere near me
yosuke: so what was your motive
adachi: oh, im just a huge misogynist actually
the older i get the more disgusted by diet culture i become.
there’s a reason it targets young girls. there’s a reason it hinges on making grown women look tiny and helpless and weak. there’s a reason that it is normalized to the extent that what is ostensibly not a healthy act is seen as being a “good” choice and something to be proud of.
young people are just completely submerged in it. adults forget that kids pick up on fucking everything and they hear their parents and their teachers and everyone on this planet not eating red meat this week or on juice cleanses or denying denying denying themselves (”oh good for you! i’d never be able to be so well-behaved”). they learn really, really fast that “fat” is a funny, not-good, close-to-a-swear word - to the extent that my usually well-behaved five year olds will devolve into crazy giggles because i asked “pass me one of the fat markers please”. they don’t react like that to anything else, just “fat” which they know is bad/off-limits/terrible.
and we pretend we’re so confused by obesity and by the skyrocketing eating disorder rate - a rate of diagnosedeating disorders, mind you, since disordered eating is now essential to many american eating traditions - and we blame millenials or GMOs or whatever won’t make us look a multi-billion dollar industry in the eye and realize. they literally teach us from a young age what is essentially a restriction/denial cycle that is very close to a binge cycle. they teach us “good” and “bad” and “safe” foods but don’t supply the money for us to obtain those foods (and god forbid you live in a food desert) while also selling us Magical Cures For Magical Transformations.
and of course it works. you teach people to crash diet and lo and behold their metabolism becomes entirely dependent on your cycle of starvation/refeeding. the statistic that most people gain back the weight they lost isn’t because people are these terrible people have no self control (but they sell that idea to you, don’t they), it’s that their metabolism was trashed and the way they look at food cannot change in the span of a crash diet - if it takes someone with an eating disorder seven years to recover, we understand that, but if someone overweight gains back their lost weight it’s “a shame”. and the diet culture wins both sides, i want you to understand that. they make money of of you either way. they know that you’re gaining the weight back but fucking scrambling - they know you’ll try to buy their product because last time it worked to buy atkins or weight watchers, and they know that when you’re losing the weight, well, goddamn, you’re going to be an advertising board for them because we teach each other that this is coffee-break material, isn’t it.
and we sell each other on it. we say, “oh this worked for me, you’ve gotta try it.” none of the people we speak to are nutritionists, but everyone on the internet has a degree in medicine, so don’t worry, if you step outside in a bikini and are not unhealthy levels of skinny (oh but it’s healthy if it’s the right kind of skinny), you will be reminded to lose weight. we keep our women running on such low levels of carbs/calories/fats that they’re permanently exhausted, weak, emotionally drained - and then we crow women are just crazy. meanwhile men get the opposite treatment that is unhealthy in a different way – the obsession with masculinity through food, of all things, that salad is “rabbit food” and that a real “man’s meal” is red meat and beer.
and god forbid you say, “this shit is fucking predatory, it’s evil, it’s controlling people’s bodies” because you’ll get fifty-seven “okay, fatty” comments that miss the point completely, because the companies are really, reallysmart and they learned: if you call someone fat, you can ignore them completely. and anyone who isn’t “into dieting” is therefore fat and incapable of healthy eating. healthy eating, is of course, defined by the company - but hey! you can help that person realize they’re just a stupid/dumb/ignorant fatty. or if they’re somehow magically not fat, you can tell them, “well, one day you will be.”
and i just know. i know. this shit will continue. it always does.
akechi’s confidant links? more like
