#shelter in place

When you start dressing up to go to the mailbox.

“You seem very well, things look peaceful
I’m not quite as well, I thought you should know”
-Alanis Morissette, You Oughta Know

Friends, I’m struggling these days. I’ve been shut in since Feb 27–which I know is earlier than the mandatory lockdown (& I know specifically it was on Feb 27 because I was doing a big project & kept putting off going to the coffee shop saying Tomorrow, Tomorrow, Tomorrow, which, well, turned into this)–so forgive me for not being more positive. I’m sorry this happened to you, I’m sorry this happened to me, I’m sorry this happened period. I do believe we’re all in this together–I don’t feel special or anything. (I know I’m better off than some because I can tell you that I am not ok–& I mustered up the strength to make this [whatever it is] here–Booyah! Some people are barely getting by–sleeping/watching Netflix/glued to the news/playing video games/smoking pot [LEGALLY, OF COURSE]/drinking–just depressed as all hell… & who can blame them, really?!?) Please, if you can, do me a solid & let me know if you too are crawling up the walls, lacking focus, feeling “meh.” I swear I’m not someone who gets off on other people in pain BUT it helps me to know that I’m not blowing this out of proportion or feeling crazy for no reason; if you are also crying incessantly & fighting with family/your significant other & wondering how on earth you’re going to pay your bills… SHOUT OUT TO ALL THOSE PEEPS WHO AREN’T MAKING THE PERFECT DINNERS, DOING YOGA (or any exercise but eating lots–diets be damned!), LEARNING A NEW SKILL ON YOUTUBE, GETTING THEIR HOUSE ORGANIZED, CRAFTING OR CREATING OR WHATEVER. I SEE YOU (you’re just as valid & I miss you!) & I FEEL YOU. SOLIDARITY.

(That is not to say I don’t appreciate those that are making chicken salad out of this chicken sh*t situation! I have been positive, I hope to be positive once again–I am so up & down, people! I’ve Zoomed & watched FB live & FaceTimed. [Today, my husband is taking me around/walking & I am ridiculously excited…] Like Dorinda M [RHONY] said, “I’m doing everything & nothing well”-SAME GIRL, SAME.)