Peter: I feel nothing. I am made of pure apathy and the ability to punch people the frick out.

Tony: I literally saw you making kissing noises at cats across the street last night.

Peter: Shut the frick up Mr. Stark

Tony: On all levels except physical, I am dead inside.

Peter: Not if I can helo it! *tackles in hug*

Tony, fighting back a smile: Damn it.

Peter: *sends Tony a voice message*

Tony: *texting back* I’m in a meeting, is it urgent?

Peter: No, it’s fine. Just listen later!

*Later*

Tony: *presses play*

Peter’s voice message: THERES A FIRE-

Tony: Where’s Peter?

Ned: He’s, uh, busy.

MJ: Being an idiot.

Tony: What kind of idiot?

MJ: The “everything is now on fire” kind.

Tony: Why are you sad?

Peter: How do you know I’m sad.

Tony: Well, you’re dressed in sad colors and you were playing a sad song and you’re wearing a button that says “I’m sad, ask me why”.

Tony: Name five things that make you happy.

Peter: Hanging out with MJ, MJ’s opinions, MJ’s eyes, how smart MJ is.

May: Are you sure you’re not in love with MJ?

Peter: I’m feeling a little less sure

enbymorganstark:

an extensive (/s) text chain between tony and peter ~ 2018-present day