ARC Training Program Ch. 11 “Battle Part 1”

I am so sorry it’s been so long since I’ve posted another chapter, but I’ve finally started writing my own novel! I have a rough draft completed and now I’m on the second draft! This one is a little shorter than normal and only part 1 but I wanted to post another chapter and let you know I’m still writing this, just working on other things. I’ll try and have part 2 out soon though!

Rex hadn’t sealed his visor properly. He knows this because the harsh fumes from the crashed gunship chokes him with every breath. The adrenaline rushing through his body makes him frantic as he fumbles with his helmet before hearing the hiss of the seal. After a few coughs and desperate deep breaths, he’s able to get himself under control. He glances around the ship that now lays on its side taking in the damages. So far, the ARC Troopers looked unfazed as if the crash was all part of the plan. He looks over at Bacara, Gree, and Wolffe. They each look rattled in their own way. Bacara was an unreadable stone but his death grip on the support handle exposed his inner panic. Wolffe is crouched low with hands spread flat against the ship floor that used to be the left side door. His head scans back and forth trying to process the situation. Gree leans against the ship floor that is now the right wall. He’s perfectly still but Rex can see his chest rising and falling to quickly to be regular breathing. A little rattled but they were alive. Rex feels a small twitch of a smile. Would have been really embarrassing if they had died at the start of their first assignment.

            Commander Fordo is the first to poke his head out of the opening where the ship door flew off in the crash. Rex waits, watching the other ARC Troopers to gage their reactions. They all watch the Commander intently until finally, he gives the signal. Bacara and Gree are the first ones out. If he asked them why they would probably say because they were the closest to the opening or because they were eager to see some action. But Rex knew that crash stirred up some unpleasant memories still fresh in all their minds. They wait again when Commander Fordo is out of the gunship. After he assesses the area he gives another signal for everyone else to follow. Its all surreal to Rex. The ARC Troopers are dead silent making the sound of every step, every gesture, every shift of the blaster feel deafening.

            Rex takes position near the nose of the ship, blaster ready for any sign of movement. Captain Alpha stands near him in a similar stance as Commander Fordo continues to scan the area. Rex wants to ask why they aren’t advancing but he already knows why. Their ship was shot down meaning the droids aren’t far behind. Rex swallows and adjusts his blaster so he has a better grip. Then a blaster fires. At first, he thinks he’s set his off on accident but then he hears a blood chilling thud behind him. he glances back only for a second to see Trooper in white gear on the ground, red pooling beneath his head.

            Rex opens fires along with the rest of their squad. He’s not aiming at anything in particular. His eyes are blurry with from another surge of adrenaline. Bacara and Gree are on the other side of the ship. Wolffe is towards the aft end of the ship. that wasn’t one of us. But that’s wrong and he knows it. Just because that Trooper didn’t train with him didn’t make him any less of a brother. A sour taste coats his mouth and he grits his teeth. His eyes adjust and focuses on movement from a balcony of the building in front of him. He lines up his shot and fires, not lowering his blaster until he hears metal hitting cement.

            Captain Alpha moves drawing Rex’s attention to fall back with the rest. The huddle behind the gunship with Commander Fordo still near the nose of the ship. Rex and the others don’t stop firing until the Commander turns and gives another signal. Rex and Trooper from the group assigned with the ARC Troopers step out from their cover and draw the droids fire. Behind him he hears someone move close aiming a scope at the building where most of the enemy fire is coming from. When he falls back, Colt rushes forward, falling to one knee and fires a missile. He fires wherever the Trooper with scope points until the fire ceases. Commander Fordo scans the area again before finally giving the ‘move forward’ signal.

            Rex wants to speak so bad it almost hurt but even if he could he didn’t know what he would say. He wanted to ask about the Trooper who survived the crash only to be shot down the second he stepped into the light. Who was he? How many battles has he fought in? How close was he to the others assigned to the squad? Why him and not Rex? That thought punches Rex square in the chest. He feels out of breath and has to fight to get his breathing under control. He forces his eyes to focus on Havoc walking right in front of him. when Commander Fordo holds up his hand telling them to stop, he then motions for someone to move forward. Gree’s right behind him and moves to his side. Rex’s ears ring as he tries to make out what he’s hearing. It’s not until it turns the corner heading in their direction does, he realizes it’s a tank. They immediately open fire on it even though it was futile. Commander Fordo lowers and gives another signal but it was too low for anyone in the back to see clearly. It’s not until he sees the rope fall from one of the buildings and Captain Alpha repels down does he realize the Commander wasn’t signaling them. Rex hadn’t even realized the Captain was gone. The Captain moves so quickly as he rolls towards the tank, leaps up the side, climbing to the top, jumps, fires down creating an opening, before falling through. They cease fire and wait until blaster fire shoots from within the tank in all directions. Rex grits his teeth unable to tear his eyes away from the tank until Captain Alpha leaps back out of the tank and dashes away before the tank explodes.

            Commander Fordo must have given the advance signal but Rex doesn’t see it. he’s still focused on the black spot that used to be a tank. Blitz knocks his shoulder in passing snapping Rex out of his daze. The other non-ARC’s seemed to be in a similar daze as they struggle to move their feet. When the Captain joins their line snaking their way through the city, he gives a look back at Rex and the others. Rex just knows he’s grinning ear to ear which nearly makes Rex audibly laugh. Luckily, he swallows that laugh before he makes any noise. When they move further into the city, they finally spot their target. A giant heavy canon that is placed at the top of the banking clan headquarters. They stop so Commander Fordo can pull out his com and message General Kenobi.

            “General Kenobi, target sighted.” The Commander says as little as possible.

            “Very good, Commander. Proceed with the next phase.” The General is just as brief before the transmission is gone and the Commander gives them their next signal.

            Scaling the side of a building is a first for Rex. They’ve practiced with the citadel, once outside on a platform above the sea, and that one time Neyo threw Fox’s shoe at the ceiling with a big glob of glue stuck to its sole. But a building that seemed to stretch all the way to the sky? This had Rex checking five times to make sure he had a firm hold before letting himself get pulled up. Commander Fordo, Captain Alpha, and Colt were the first ones up and immediately opened fire. Rex was a little embarrassed to say he was one of the last and his legs trembled for at least three steps before returning to normal. Things were moving smoothly with the ARC’s leading the way. Rex felt like every time he lines up his shot, one of the ARC’s would take it out before he could pull the trigger. Two times it was Captain Alpha who would give a look his direction. Rex couldn’t tell if it was a “Gotta be faster then that, cadet.” Or a “Beat you.” Look. Only after Colt fires another missile at the control tower of the building and all the droids are put down do they lower their blasters. Rex spots Commander Fordo holster his left blaster but gives his right one a spin before holstering that one. Rex immediately wanted to try that but he doesn’t have his dual blasters and would be really embarrassed if anyone saw him try the first time.

            When they finally scale up to the giant heavy canon, they get busy setting the charges. Rex is kneeling to keep the shaking to a minimum. He could just see himself tripping on thin air and plummeting to his death. He tries to focus on the charge in front of him. When Havoc walks towards them carrying two more charges, the canon fires with a deafening crack that sends a shock through Rex’s body. Even with the hearing protection in their helmets his ears still ring from the blast. Havoc’s arms sway from the shifting of the canon beneath his feat. He gives an aggravated “Ugh.” Earning him a few glares from Commander Fordo and Captain Alpha. He looks back at them, noting their glares before facing forward again and going even louder, “Ugh!”

            This time Rex lets out a laugh and doesn’t feel to bad about it. it wasn’t like the droids didn’t know they were here, and it was to late for the droids to stop them from blowing the canon. When they’re all set and armed, they shoot their extension cables once more to the top of the control tower. This time Rex doesn’t waste time checking and rechecking his cord. He races up the side with others desperate to get off the canon. When the bombs go off the blast is almost as loud as the canon itself. The heat burns through Rex’s gear and seems to push Rex faster to the top. that or the shear fear and getting caught in the blast. When they finally reach the top, they take up position looking out over the city. Smoke can be seen lifting to the sky in several parts of the city as gunships continue to lower to the surface. Somewhere out there Cody is fighting on the frontlines. Rex’s ringing ears struggle to make out the fighting from the main horde. He hopes Cody is having as smooth of a time as they are.

Cody

            Cody knew they were doomed when Neyo shouts, “I have an idea!” and the General smiles.

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At what point did a fictional character make you hyperfixate on them to the point you are unable to think of anything else?

I’ll go first:

ARC Training Program “First Day”

(I know I haven’t posted in a while, sorry! I’ve taken a break to focus more on my novel but now I’m taking a break from that… so here is the next chapter! Sorry it’s a shorter one.)

“ARC Troopers, you have been selected for this task because you are the best, the elite, you all know what to do. The success of your mission is our key to a swift victory. When you get into position, send word as planned. Then I will join you.” Obi Wan Kenobi’s words were clear and direct, but Alpha wasn’t listening. His mind was somewhere else back on Kamino stuck in a conversation that plays on an endless loop through his mind. When the Jedi leaves so that they can prepare for the mission, the other Troopers regain life and begin to move around the room and speak amongst themselves. Alpha doesn’t move. He is rooted to his spot. He uses all his self control to focus on calm breathing and forces his eyes to glare at nothing but the ship floor. After a moment of Alpha not moving, one of the Troopers in pure white clone gear steps forward.

“Sir, we’re prepped and are ready for battle.” Cody stands at attention waiting for his Captain to respond. Alpha lets his eyes scan over to the clone beside him. With both men wearing helmets, it was impossible to tell what either was thinking. Cody clears his throat and fights the urge to sneak a glance at his brothers while under Alpha’s silent stare.

“Line up Troopers.” Fordo’s voice is sudden and nearly startles the kid, but he manages to keep his cool by giving a quick salute before speed walking over to the group of newly graduate clones. Alpha’s stare follows the boy only causing Cody to stiffen and grow more uncomfortable. Fordo turns his visor on Alpha.

“A word, Captain,” Fordo’s voice comes out a little to loudly causing the other ARC Troopers to take notice of their Commander and Captain stepping out of the room. Now in the corridor, Alpha lets his eyes land on the ARC Trooper in red and white gear. His hands clench into tight fists.

Fordo puts his hands on his hips with a sigh before saying, “You can be mad at me all you want but I need—theyneed you to have a clear head!”

Alpha’s jaw clenches so tight it hurts. It takes everything to hold himself back.

“Sir. Yes. Sir.” Every word is forced before the real words can come pouring out in an irreversible flood of rage. The air around them is heavy where one wrong move could end in complete disaster. Neither of them could afford anything to go wrong today. The Jedi were watching their every move in this mission. They couldn’t slip up before the mission even started.

Alpha is the first to walk back into the room with the other Troopers. One second more and he wasn’t sure if he could restrain himself. While walking towards the far end of the room a cluster of soft voices comes over his commlink.

“… not something we did, right?” it was one of his new Troopers. Alpha almost comes to a complete stop.

“I don’t think we’ve been Clone Troopers long enough to make him angry.” A different clone, probably Rex says.

“You don’t think we did anything to get knocked down to cadets again, do you?” the voice is timid so it must be Gree.

There’s a chuckle and a different boy with too much confidence in his voice says, “That would be a new record I’m sure.”

Alpha feels his anger subside for a moment as a smile begins to form across his lips. He clears his throat and says, “I can hear you.”

Eight clone’s whip their heads in Alpha’s direction. He holds in a chuckle while laughter erupts on the other end of the room where the other ARC Troopers were listening in on the newly graduate clones open commlink. All eight wince and begin bickering with each other over whose fault this was. Alpha walks over to their group causing them to fall into silence.

“For the upcoming mission I’ve decided to split you up into two groups of four,” Alpha moves on straight to business. “Four will be coming with the ARC Trooper team and the other four will be joining Jedi General Kenobi.”

There is a sudden wave of anger and anxiety with clenched fists and stiffened posture. Alpha waits to let them settle their thoughts before one steps forward. He stands at attention trying to stay professional.

“Sir, I thought the point of this program was to train us to be ARC Troopers? By splitting us up and sending half with the Jedi would it not put that half behind?” Fox’s voice was calm, but Alpha could hear the steel in his words.

“I’m training you to be leaders, not ARC Troopers. One day each of you will be assigned to a battalion that you will lead into battle beside a Jedi general. The ARC Troopers can help you acquire skill but none of that will be worth a damn if you can’t follow the orders given to you by the Jedi.” He waits for anyone else to come forward. When they don’t, he lets out a breath and goes on, “Cody, Fox, Thire, and Neyo will be joining the Jedi.”

Cody and Fox break their forcefully causal stances and look like they’re going to argue. One sharp look from Alpha, even with his helmet on, puts them in their place. Thire and Neyo show no sign of disappointment or excitement. Thire gives a nod while Neyo shrugs his shoulders like he couldn’t care less where he was assigned. Rex and Wolffe give each other looks but with their helmets Alpha couldn’t tell what it meant. Bacara was just as indifferent as Neyo, but Gree looked like he was buzzing with excitement. Alpha gestures for the four going with the Jedi to follow him. He ignores the slight grumble from Fox and the sluggish movements from Cody. When they’re walking through the corridors of the ship Alpha chuckles, “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you boys were pouting.”

“I’m not—” Cody and Fox blurt out before falling into silent embarrassment. Alpha smiles under his helmet and leads them into the ship’s hanger. He spots Kenobi staring at a fleet of starships preparing to depart for battle. When he sees Alpha, he gives a smile.

“Captain, are these the Troops you were telling me about?” Kenobi places a hand on his hip while taking in the four clones. They pop to attention in front of the Jedi. Alpha crosses his arms with a soft chuckle.

“They’re still green but they’ll get the job done.”

“Not a problem. I look forward to working alongside you four. You can board the gunship with the others. We’ll be parting shortly.” Kenobi gestures to the closest gunship. The four salute and walk towards the ship. Alpha stares after them. His hands squeeze the sides of his crossed arms. Kenobi notices and gives him a light pat on the shoulder.

“It never gets easier,” Kenobi’s eyes look out to the new Jedi Knight getting settled in his starship. “You just have to trust your training and trust them.”

Alpha lets out a shaky breath exposing how anxious he really was. Wanting to move past the emotional moment, Alpha turns towards Kenobi, “Where are the Troops coming with us?”

Kenobi points to a small squad of clones in pure white armor standing to the side. With half of his boys going with the ground assault they were going to need to fill in their ranks. Fordo wasn’t happy with the thought of splitting them up but Alpha didn’t care. Cody and Fox would excel alongside the ARC’s, but what they really needed was time working beside a Jedi. Neyo was a wild card and Alpha would be the first to admit he lets him get away with a little too much. If he can’t handle following a Jedi, then he’ll have to go back to the drawing board with that one. He wasn’t sure how Thire would do. In the ground assault Thire wouldn’t be able to rely on the shadows. He’ll have to adapt and quickly. At least that’s the reason he told Fordo. The real reason he was sending half his squad was a truth Alpha wasn’t quite ready to admit to himself.

When he leaves Kenobi and begins leading the new Troops back towards the ARC Troopers the conversation with Fordo on Kamino comes flooding back. He squeezes his eyes shut when the wave of anger washes back over him. The Troops behind him notice and give him a wide berth. When he makes it back to the room with the ARC’s he sees his boys checking their gear one more time before lining up. The Troops Alpha had escorted in takes in the new four.

“Who are you four supposed to be?” one of the newer ones say. Bacara manages to side eye the Trooper even with his helmet on.

“We’re part of the ARC Training Program.” Gree explains proudly. The new Troops exchange looks with each other before the one who approached them snorts.

“ARC Training Program? You’re either born an ARC or you’re not one at all.” The Trooper crosses his arms. “How long have you been in?”

“Since… yesterday.” Gree says with less enthusiasm. The Troopers burst into hysteric laughter. Alpha reaches his limit and clears his throat with a glance over his shoulder towards them. the new Troopers straighten up and put some distance between them and Alpha’s four. Bacara keeps an eye on them but follows the others when it was time for them to board their gunship.

“Listen up,” Alpha turns to his four and quickly shows them how to connect to the ARC commlink. “We’ll be silent from here on out. The Seppies like to try and listen in on our chatter so we’ll be relying mostly on hand signals. Only use verbal communication when necessary.”

“Understood.” They say as one. When the gunship departs, they can already hear the blaster fire from the fight in space. Alpha keeps an eye on his four and an eye on the new Troops. He was feeling something he’s never felt before. His legs begin to feel weak and a sour taste coats his tongue making him feel nauseous. Memories of finding his boys in the training simulation covered in blood and shrapnel burns behinds his eyes.

“You’re kidding me.” Alpha had laughed expecting what he was just told to be a joke. He was standing in his room with Fordo who stood with arms crossed, his expression serious.

“It’s time Alpha. If we’re going to take Muunilinst we’re going to need them to fill in our ranks.”

Alpha couldn’t believe what he was hearing. A sudden urgency falls over Alpha as he says, “Cody just got out of his bacta tank! Half of them still walk with a limp. They aren’t ready.”

“We’ve gone into battle with much worse. They’ll be fine.” Fordo doesn’t budge. Alpha knew he was talking to a brick wall and the fact that Fordo was keeping his cool and Alpha was close to losing it only fanned his anger. Fordo goes on, “They were able to complete an ARC Trooper level battle simulation with training blasters. I’m not even convinced all ARC Troopers could do that. They’re ready.”

“It’s not your call. This is my program Fordo. I say when they’re ready or not.” Alpha stands his ground. He’s worked to hard for this to be swept out from under him. Fordo’s eyes fall to the floor for a moment before meeting Alpha’s again.

“It’s already done. I spoke with the Prime Minister. They’re already marked for graduation and assigned to the Muunilinst mission.”

Alpha feels the breath get knocked out of his lungs. His limbs feel numb as he tries to grasp the words coming out of his Commander’s mouth. It’s already done.A pain aches through his chest with a heavy weight. The image of Fordo changes in that moment for Alpha. He was no longer speaking with a trusted friend and brother. This was his Commander. Nothing more.

Alpha’s grip on the handgrip tightens as the gunship lowers into Muunilinst’s atmosphere. The gunship has fallen into a dead silence. His four were holding up under the anticipation for their first battle. After a time, Kenobi’s voice comes over their commlink.

“ARC Troopers, deploy!” with that command their gunship pulls away from the horde heading for the ground assault. Alpha closes his eyes pushing back the memory of Thire’s limp body being carried down from the tower in the battle simulation. Fox cold and lifeless, Neyo barely recognizable under a pile of droids, and Cody falling from the citadel tower. He opens his eyes with a deep breath. Kenobi’s words ring in his ears. Trust your training and trust them.

And then their gunship is shot down.

Read full story HERE on AO3!!!

What’s Left Ch. 5 “Fragments”

(Fives(child or rex) begins decoding the memory core and Kix returns to a familiar place.

ALSO! I’ve just now realized that I’ve been writing Fives nickname as Fifi as in Feefee BUT I really mean for it to be read as Fye Fee. If that makes any form of sense. Don’t write at 1 in the morning kids. The brain does weird things. Also, I’m too lazy to change it now unless someone can give a better way to spell it because my brain is tapped out at the moment :))

Qell

The ice in his drink clinks as he shifts in his chair and exhales a cloud of smoke through his nostrils. The image of Jacen approaching Dee’s concert plays across 6 different screens hanging on the wall above his desk. He takes another drag of the spice stick and leans back in his chair. His eyes stare at the dark ships ceiling. This could be bad. The spice stick is stolen from his lips before Calli sits on his desk with one leg crossed over the other. She takes a hit, winks, and exhales a stream of smoke.

“Boy Scout got you down?” she lightly bounces her foot that is crossed over the other and offers him his stick back. He takes it and lifts it to his lips.

“If Dee gets involved…” he shakes his head. Calli shrugs her shoulders.

“She’s better then Jess.” Calli steals Qell’s drink and takes a sip. Her nose wrinkles slightly so she sets it back down.

“Jess is smart, but she can be predictable. Dee’s…”

“Like Fievel?” she finishes for him. He breathes out another cloud of smoke and nods. When the doors behind them part, he turns his chair to face Gigi and Suzu who are rushing out of the garage towards the spare parts bin. They rummage through the junk before Suzu pulls out a coil. Gigi tries to fight her for it, but they end up both grasping hold of it and running back into the garage. Calli and Qell exchange a look before they get to their feet to go see how much progress has been made.

The garage is dark besides a few lamps peering down at the blackboard where Chop is scribbling something below a mess of different equations. He’s muttering to himself as he writes, completely oblivious to everything around him. Fifi is hunched over a cylinder on the other side of the room. Power tools and spare parts surround him like some kind of nest. He sits in a chair that swivels around the cylinder. His welding mask is pulled over his face despite how dark it is in his area. Neon glow in the dark pain appears on the walls, floors, and ceilings of the garage. Gigi and Suzu rush over to Fifi and hand him the coil. He pats their heads and goes back to working on the cylinder.

“How’s it going?” Qell asks. Chop doesn’t even react to his voice. He wipes away something he wrote that leaves a smudge of chalk before trying to write over it. Fifi lifts a hand up in acknowledgment but goes back to his work. Calli makes a clicking sound with her teeth while carefully maneuvering around the junk on the floor to get a closer look at Chops work. Chop might be a little scatter brained, but he knew what he was doing. Qell found his way to Fifi, who still doesn’t stop working. Behind Fifi, on a workbench, is the memory core. Fifi decoded it while they were asleep. He came out of his funk and went straight to work. Qell wasn’t thrilled about the fact that he chose work oversleep but he knew he had to pick and choose his battles. This wasn’t going to be one. Qell scans over the seemingly endless information sprayed into the air from the memory core. There was so much they could use, but they were only after one thing.

“Got it!” Chop shoots up, nearly hitting Calli who was leaning over him to get a better look at the board. Fifi finally tears his eyes away from the cylinder and looks towards Chop. Chop moves so his work can be seen more clearly. Qell arched a brow. To him, it looked like a jumbled up mess of a mad man. But Fives could see it. Fives slides out of his chair and approaches the blackboard. He places a hand on Chop’s shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.

“It’s perfect.” He says behind the mask. Qell leaned against the workbench and crosses his arms. Calli moves over to stand next to him as Fives and Chop go deeper into their own little nerd world. Gigi and Suzu stand at their feet as if they understood what was happening, but really, they were just waiting for the okay to start dismantling things again.

Calli nudges Qell’s side, “I don’t think we’ll need to worry about Dee.”

“You think?” Qell chuckles when Chop and Fives start arguing over some part of the problem.

“I think by the time the Princess finds us; it’ll already be too late.”

Kix

Part of him probably shouldn’t have been surprised that Rex had more than one kid. Most people had at least two. The thing that set Kix’s mind reeling was the fact that no one had bothered to tell him. Though, when he really thought about it, they probably don’t really trust him yet and… that’s fair. Dogma sets her glass down and crosses her arms, never breaking eye contact with Jacen.

“We’re trying to get him out of trouble.” Jacen’s eyes try to tell more than his words, but Dogma’s face never changes. Reveth steps forward, her hands clenched into fists.

“He fucked with the Crimson Corsair and we’re getting tired of all this running around trying to find him. We made a deal with Maz that we would bring him in alive. You can help us now and save everyone some heartache or… step aside and I tell my captain you left us no choice.” Reveth has reached the end of her rope. Kix couldn’t blame her. She’s been remarkably tame during this whole ordeal. Now, even Kix was growing tired of it all. They needed real answers. Dogma’s eyes cast down to the floor and back up to meet Reveth’s.

“Fine,” she says finally. Her words are short and laced with venom. “Because Maz still has hope for him.”

She pushes herself away from the table and strides to the closet disappearing inside leaving the room heavy with tension. Jacen glances at Reveth but she doesn’t show any signs of bluffing. Pendewqell stands next to her, forming a united front in this decision forcing Kix to reluctantly fall in behind them. These were the people that saved him. He owed them this. The room is unbearably silent while they wait for Dogma to reemerge from her closet. When she does, Kix is a little shocked. Not because she is dressed in a bright frilly dress that Kix was expecting, but because she wears sensible clothes with neutral colors. She pulls her hair back up into a tight ponytail and pulls on her single bag that drapes over her shoulders.

“I’ve got to clear some things up with my manager and then I’ll meet you at the Ghost.” She says when she’s situated. Jacen gives her the Ghosts coordinates and leads them to the lift and out of the building.

Outside, its eerily dark and quiet compared to the bright chaotic lights and music that had surrounded them when they first arrived. The theater is almost completely empty now with only a few workers dotting the stadium cleaning up trash. When they are back on the ordinary streets, Kix feels himself give a sigh of relief. He hadn’t noticed before, but he had been tensed from the second they stepped into that building. They barely talk while maneuvering through the late night crowds of Coruscant. Most people at this hour were drunk and trying to find their way home while others were trying to keep the party going. At some point, things were looking more and more familiar. Kix stops, causing Pendewqell to walk into his back.

“What’s wrong?” Reveth turns back when she realizes he’s not directly behind her.

“I… I just…” he starts to explain but the words disappear and he’s walking down a different street. The light fixture that has the large dent… the statue of some wealthy patron that was rammed by a speeder all those years ago… the shops that may have changed their names and what they sell, but the store fronts are almost the same. He knew where he was. His feet move faster down the sidewalk.

“What’s he doing?” Azil’s voice comes from behind him, but he doesn’t stop moving. His feet carry him all the way to the end of the street where the platform drops off into a gorgeous view of the city. He feels his heart pounding in his chest. He could hardly believe it. It’s still called 79’s.

“Kix, we don’t have time for detours.” This is from Reveth. Her voice is low and softer than what most would think possible for her. But Kix just waves her away. Something compelled him to enter the bar. The bar he and Jesse would go to after every mission. The bar they used to go to with Hardcase. He forces the knot in his throat down and steps inside.

Kix stops dead in his tracks. Not because the bar was almost completely the same, minus the different furniture and modern music, but because of the sea of white armor scattered throughout the bar. He rubs his face trying to fix his vision, but when he looks, they’re still there. With tears blurring his eyes he opens his mouth to call out to them… until one speaks.

“Just gonna stand there or come on in?” a voice drunkenly laughs to his side. His delusion shatters. The faces his mind so desperately wanted to see shift into strangers. These aren’t clones. They’re stormtroopers.

Kix knew he should leave. Do the smart thing and walk away. The others didn’t even dare to come in. They probably saw the stormtroopers and fell back unable to convince Kix not to go in. He should turn back. But he couldn’t. He hesitantly moves along the back wall, steering as clear of the stormtroopers as possible, and heads for the refresher. He doesn’t know why he feels the need to return here. To the last place he saw him. The last time he felt like an ordinary soldier fighting for the right cause.

The refresher is unchanged. There’s more graffiti but it doesn’t appear the owner ever bothered to paint over the drawings they made back in the Clone Wars. He walks over to the sink closest to the back wall where he can still make out a large 501stwritten in red paint underneath layers of others scribbles. Kix catches his breath when he makes out the 5’s sister written on the wall. The animal they had drawn has been covered up by layers of writing. Kix leans against the sink feeling sick. He can feel the tears stinging his eyes but no matter how much he wanted them to come, they never did. Despite the pain and aching in his chest, the loneliness that ways him down every night when he’s alone in his room, or the wounds from the past that never seemed to heal, the thing that consumed him whole was the numbness of being left behind. All of this was history. He could stand here all night and Fives, his Fives, would never walk back through those doors. He could go back out, but Jesse wouldn’t be waiting there ready to order another round. There wasn’t a barracks to return to that is filled with brothers who felt exactly the way he felt because they were all going through the same shit. He slams his fists down on the counter and lets out a primal scream. When he finally manages to lift his eyes, he jumps back at the stranger standing right in front of him. Except, he had been leaning over the sink, and it wasn’t a stranger but his reflection.

His chest heaves with every breath. He didn’t even recognize himself. Rage spreads through his veins. He slams a fist in the mirror, watching the glass crack across his reflection and shatter around him. He falls to the floor breathless. Lifting a hand to his head he squeezes his temple trying to contain what little sanity he had left. Everything felt like it was pouring out. The anger, the pain, the overwhelming sadness. He had been doing so good to hide it. He stares at the glass scattered around him with fragments of himself staring back. Not anymore.

“Ohshit,” a voice slurs from the door to the refresher. Kix drops his head refusing to meet the stormtroopers eyes. The man stumbles further inside. “You have a lit’le too much to drink?”

The man lets out a loud laugh like this was the most hysterical thing he’s ever seen. Kix feels that rage bubbling up again. He doesn’t move, just keeps his head down.

“Hey, you gonna answer me?” the man is closer now. “Helloo?”

“Stay away from me.” Kix’s voice is barely audible. He swallows the knot in his throat.

“Hey, you know who I am? I can do whateverthefuck I want,” the man is crouching down so he can shout in Kix’s ears. Kix fixates on a spot on the floor, feeling heat spreading across his face. His fingers fumble with something on the floor next to him. “I’m a soldier! You should be respecting me! You have any idea what I gotta go through? What have you ever done to…”

Kix is staring into the man’s eyes. He doesn’t remember moving. He doesn’t fully understand what happened. The man’s eyes are wide, he’s making a choking noise. Something warm is dripping down Kix’s hand. Finally, Kix breaks eye contact and sees a glass shard plunged into the man’s neck. Kix’s hand grasps so tightly to the shard that it cuts through his palm. Kix gasps and releases the shard and pushes away from the man. The man chokes while fumbling with the piece of broken mirror stuck into his neck.

“It was… accident… it was…” Kix can’t breathe. He shakily gets to his feet while watching the man. The man pulls the shard out causing blood to pour down the left side of his body. The man reaches a hand towards Kix, but he’s pushed himself against the refresher stalls trying to get away from him. when the man falls to the floor, unmoving, silent, Kix turns and vomits.

He shoves through two stormtroopers who are walking towards the refresher. They frown at Kix but don’t seem to notice the blood staining his hands and jeans. Kix blinks struggling to remember where the exit is. When he finds it, he falls to his knees on the concrete outside with sweat pouring down his face. He’s gasping, desperate to get air in his lungs. There’s shouting coming from inside the bar. When the doors to the bar open, he can hear the feet approaching. He squeezes his eyes shut. Get-a-grip-get-a-grip! His body doesn’t listen. He’s frozen. He glances back at five stormtroopers shouting down at him. He can’t make out what their saying over the blood rushing in his ears. They raise their blasters at him. Kix closes his eyes and waits.

When a blaster fires and Kix is still alive, he opens his eyes. Reveth is standing over him with her blasters aimed at the stormtroopers.

“MoveKix!” she yells, still firing on approaching stormtroopers. This breaks Kix out of his trance. He’s running for the alleys. He’s alive. For whatever reason for him to still be here, he’s alive.

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