Steven: How come you and Pearl fight so much?

Garnet: Good question, Steven! Tell him, Amethyst.

Amethyst: It’s over! Pearl and I have come to an understanding!

Steven: You pushed her overboard!

Amethyst: That’s what life jackets are for!

Source: Jump Start comic

Pearl (about Connie): My baby! So ready to learn! You’re my favorite!

Steven: What about me?

Pearl: You are my favorite son. She is my favorite recruit. 

Source: Wings of Fire

Steven: WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?!

Connie: WH- NOTHING!

Steven: DANG IT! *is visibly stressed*

Connie: …?????????

Steven:I’ve learned to remind myself that my mother and I are two separate individuals.

Connie: And have you enjoyed much success with this approach?

Steven: No, but I do keep reminding myself.

Connie: Steven, you gotta tell us what’s going on!

Steven: …worm

Connie: …what?-

Steven then became the worm

[Steven splits himself in two to be in two places at once]

Pearl: Steven, why is a pink version of yourself wreaking havoc across Beach City? And why do you look so pale and weak?

Steven: Uh… No reason…

Pearl:STEVEN.

“Lion, you are so lucky you don’t know who your parents are.”
— Steven

“Wanna fight me because you hate me? There’s a tax for that”

- Steven to Aquamarine and Eyeball

*During I am My Monster*

Connie: My god…

Ronaldo: …zilla

Steven: Oh no, a gun man!

Eyeball, wearing a pistol costume: Oh ho ho, I’m gonna stab ya!

*Steven trying to record a random video alone*

Amethyst: Yo, if you enter someone’s selfie, does it become an usie?

Steven: Delete video