#tall people

How tall are you?

Whenever I look up ergonomic info for setting up my home desk, I run into the same thing: “Make sure monitor is at eye level.” I just measured and my monitor screen itself is 14″ tall. So… “Top of the screen”? “Middle of the screen”? “Bottom of the screen”? 

(Or this, from WebMD: “If you can, place your screen on a surface that’s arm’s length away and eye level.”  Um… at least you were specific this time? Because you just told me to put my desk (or at least the bottom edge of the monitor’s foot) at eye level… and I’m pretty sure that’s not what you meant either.)

Ergonomics is supposed to help you by lining you up just right for best, least-strained body position. Yet over the years, this wording persists. I already wasn’t going to put it over my head or under my desk, thanks. I already got that. 

Really, I already had the concept of “somewhere in front of your face”. Would anyone,anywhere like to be a little more specific??? Or does it really not matter where in my eyeline that 14″ falls?

Especiallysince you’re always very specific about the useless advice:

“wrists slightly lower or even with elbows” (I must be an orangutan, because that would require my keyboard be literally on my lap, with no room for a desk surface at all. Am I really the only one whose elbows hang naturally several inches below her waist?)

“knees and hips level, feet flat on the floor”(Because I own my own desk I can do this without carving up my legs as they’re jammed up into the mounts for the keyboard tray I made them take off because I physically can’t get my knees under a standard desk with one of those there. Yes: my shin length is too tall to fit well under a standard office desk, even without a tray. So if you want my feet flat on the floor, even barefoot, instead of tucked up under the chair seat…)
(O.K., Great, now we have my level forearms such that there’s nearly a whole inch between my palms and thighs. It better be a very thin, verywell positioned desktop.)

“arms close to the sides” (Every woman out there with a bra cup larger than “C”? one collective eyeroll on my mark: 1…2…3…. ༼ ◐_◐ ༽ ༼ ◓_◓ ༽ ༼ ◑_◑ ༽ Everyone else? Imagine your elbows are pinned to your sides and cannot move  across your chest at all–only straight forward or back, and you can angle your forearms such that maybeyou can juuuust get your thumbs in front of your nipples, max. Now try to type like that… See how there’s a good foot between your thumbs? Now try to do the proper ‘wrists in, fingers out’ angle for touch-typing…) 
(Better yet, do what my wife did on a very slow late-night shift when a male coworker friend started playing with the yarn balls she had with her for knitting: He stuck them under his t-shirt to make big “boobs”. She said, “Yeah. Now try to type like that.” He was game and quickly gained a new appreciation for something he’d always taken for granted.)

< /longstanding, self-indulgent rant >

Short people, please make sure the health of your tall person is taken into consideration when interacting with them.

Posture is very important to the giant folk.

(warning) do not attempt this method of interaction with tall people in the wild. They may be skittish and fearful, and might become defensive. Make sure to only attempt this maneuver with tall people who trust you. Treats may be used)

Casually approach your tall person and firmly but gently grasp their necks with your legs. Asking them to bend down is necessary, otherwise it’ll be seen as a threat.

They may stumble in protest, but after a while, they will become accustomed to the new physical accomodations.

Be sure to use positive reinforcement to reward your tall person.

But most of all, remember to have fun