Question for you guys

Are all the other quotes but today’s in giant font? Is it just the app? Can I fix it? Should I bother? Does it bug you? No, I’m not OCD it doesn’t bug me. Just wondering because I only use the tumblr app… help me out

Me: When creating a password, make sure it contains a number.

Customer: Is zero considered a number?

(Me giving directions to a customer on there phone)

Me: Go ahead and press settings on the screen of your phone.

Customer: With what?

Me: ?

Customer: What do I press it with?

Me: Your finger…..

Customer: My daughters friends already got their new phones and she hasn’t! You are subjecting her to being bullied at school!

Customer: I want to use my own picture for a wallpaper.

Me: Okay, I can show you how to make a wallpaper. What image do you want to use?

Customer: I had a specific image and I can’t find it. Put it on there for me.

Me: We need to know where the image is in order to set it as a wallpaper.

Customer: No!!! You find it and put it on there for me!!

Me: I need to know where you save your files. Is it in your pictures folder?

Customer: I want it on there and I want it now! Give me your manager because you obviously don’t know how to work a computer.

Customer: I want a free (insert $2grand product here) and I want it NOW.

Me: -lol don’t we allllllllll-

(Changed product to “this” for privacy)

Customer: How do I work this?

Me: I don’t know. We didn’t make this. You can contact the company who made it. They could better assist you.

Customer: Tell me how to work this.

Me: I don’t know, it’s not associated with us…

Customer: (screams and rants for 30+mins about this)

Me: Okay…. We still didn’t make this.

(changed company names for privacy)

Customer: I bought a new device and was told my headset would work! And it doesn’t fit! Your employees at BB owe me!

Me: This is actually CC, we aren’t associated with BB. Want me to transfer you?

Customer: You just want to be rid of me! And I know your lying!! This is your company!

Me: I’m sorry BB gave you wrong information but there is nothing I can do. Best I can do is get you an adapter.

Customer: This is all your fault! -disconnects-

Customer: -immediately starts spewing their issue-

Me: If I could just interrupt real quick…

Customer: NO!

Me: But I just need to…

Customer: Shut up!!! You will listen to me!

Me: Okay.

Customer: -endlessly gives me a novel of their life-

-30mins later-

Customer: Okay, now you can speak.

Me: Great! Let me transfer you to the appropriate department. You can tell them everything you told me. :)

Customer: You sure are asking a lot of questions.

Me: Yes. This is the technical help line. I need to know the issue with your device so we can try and resolve it.

Customer: That sure is suspicious. Your suspicious. -angrily hangs up-

-customer calls to troubleshoot and this requires both hands and eyes on multiple devices-

Me: Sir.. are you driving right now?

Customer: Yes, I am on the highway. But go ahead, I can multi-task. (swerves and almost hits a car)

Me: Press here.

Customer: Stop! Your talking to fast.

Me: Okay.

Customer: I said slow! Your making me angry!

Me: O………. K.

Customer: SLOW!!!!

Customer: I need you to find my phone.

Me: The phone is off and has no power. There is no way to a ping a device without some kind of signal.

Customer: I know that’s a lie. You have towers everywhere and that’s what powers my phone.

-this happens like 50x a day, every day-

Me: May I have your email please?

Customer: -proceeds to give password-

Me: No, please never give out your password. I want your email only.

Customer: -proceeds to give password again-

Me: Please, don’t, that is personal and sensitive information, privy to you. Never give it out. You will have to update it now because you said it to me and over the phone. I need your email. You know, when people send you messages to an account. Your mail.

Customer: -says password louder-

Customer: It’s your fault I forgot my information.

Customer: I dropped my laptop in water and it does not turn on now. I expect you to retrieve my data for free without repairing it.

Me: How may I help you?

Customer: I understand we are both coming off as aggressive, but your coming off really super aggressive right now!

Me: Okay…. how can I help you?

Customer: Stop being aggressive!!

Me: (gives directions)

Customer: Don’t you dare be condensing to me! I am well advanced with technology and computers, so don’t talk down to me!

Me: Okay… can you open up your browser? (points to it)

Customer: What’s that?

Customer: (says spelling of email really fast)

Me: Please go slower and give it to me phonetically.

Customer: Are you not a millennial? They talk like ZOOM and I’m able to keep up. Why can’t you?

~5 mins later ~

Me: (gives directions at a slow, snail pace)

Customer: Stop! Why are you saying it so fast? I can’t keep up!

Me: May I have your email please?

Customer: Billy!

Me: At where?

Customer: Billy!!!!

Me: Yahoo? Gmail? @ where?

Customer: Billy!! Because I am Billy and I am gangster!

Me: Excuse me?

Customer: I am gangster!!!

Me: Okay, cool. So… can I still get that email though?

Customer: I don’t need that, because I am larger then the email! I don’t do the generic AOL, I am above that!

Me: Well, I can’t pull up your information without your email…

Customer: I am Billy! You should know this!

Me: If I had your email, I would…

Customer: My SIM card is not working.

Me: Did you insert it correctly?

Customer: Well, I did file it down to make it fit.