The one lesson we can learn from the manga and the live action movie and the light novels is that Teruhashi is approximately 10 seconds away from going off the deep end and starting a cult at any time.
And the only thing stopping her seems to be Yumehara’s influence.
Think about it: Yumehara isn’t present in the live action, she never befriends Teruhashi in the light novel Evil AU, and she’s not accounted for in the manga’s Apocalypse AU either. It’s not Teruhashi’s crush on Saiki keeping her sane either, since she goes full evil villain in the live action while chasing him.
Yumehara’s friendship seems to be the only thing keeping Teruhashi from going completely off the rails at any given moment, and that’s wild.
OKAY so I’m a bit late cuz tumblr’s a flake and this and that, but! It’s time for some shitty Saiki valentines! Send these to your disaster circle! Or people you’re looking to end friendships with, whichever.
“Well, it was a close enough margin, so I’ll give a consolation prize. Even though she’s the runner up, she shines like a #1 that’s simply Teruhashi-san.”
Some context: After a poll to see which character to add into the drawing, Kuboyasu wins. (Sensei believes Teruhashi lost by 1%, but the margin was actually slightly closer, it was .6%.) In the majority of the time before the poll ended, he and Teruhashi were actually at a tie and sensei acknowledged that beforehand. Either way, extra content for us!
So they’re selling some baked goods for Hairo’s birthday but I noticed something weird.
Notice the macarons on the left. I don’t recall it from any episode, the bottom one says it’s from “PK Academy R” which is the production name for Reawakened.
I went to quickly check through every episode but nothing really matched. In the back of my mind, it made me think of a chapter that was not adapted, Chapter 134. I finally saw a match:
Btw I’m officially dead after seeing this drawing, I LEAST expected it
I should mention Asou-sensei basically stated he’ll be doing this for about one more week. It looks like this is all to celebrate the 8th anniversary of the serialization. So kind of him
Now in their first year of college, Saiki and Teruhashi reach an unexpected but inevitable roadblock in their physical relationship. Contains fluff, wholesomeness, two adults communicating responsibly and supporting each other, and humor.
Word count: 1,300
Warnings: Explicit conversation about sex and birth control; no actual sexual activity.
—
“So…” Teruhashi began flirtatiously as she sat down besides Saiki on his bed. “Nendou is out for the night, right? He mentioned that he was going home to his mother’s.”
Yeah. Something about her having a cold.
“Then you have the dorm to yourself. Well… we have it to ourselves.” She smiled and brushed her hair behind her ear. “I brought some items with me. The sales-lady helped me pick them out. I think you’ll like them.” She held up an opaque pink shopping bag that was held firmly shut with multiple pieces of tape. Of course, Saiki already knew what was in the bag, but as exciting as her purchases were, they would see no use tonight.
Teruhashi… Saiki deliberated on what to say next. He’d known this topic would be addressed in the near future; he should’ve planned ahead what to say instead of something as generic as this. We need to talk.
She immediately froze. “Talk about what?” He could see the anxiety in her eyes.
He pursed his lips and leaned forward, hands clasped between his knees. …I know what you’re planning on us doing tonight.
“Well, that’s not such a surprise,” she scoffed, although her face rapidly turned pink. “I know you can read my mind… and see into the bag.”
I don’t want you to think that I’m rejecting you.
“Why are you talking like this?” Teruhashi frowned. Concern furrowed in her brow. “What’s wrong?”
Kokomi… We can’t have sex.
She blinked, looking stunned. Then Saiki felt her anxiety start back up in full force, and he braced himself for her response. “What do you mean, we can’t?! We were just kissing and groping each other Friday! Are you saying that you’re not attracted to me anymore?”
Saiki found himself appreciating her forthrightness in this moment. It made pressing forward surprisingly easier. No, not at all. I’m still very much attracted to you. But as our physical relationship has progressed, I’ve been doing some… experiments.
Teruhashi still looked stung, but she tilted her head and nodded for him to continue.
The truth is that it’s simply not safe for us to have sex.
Her dejected expression became one of shock. “Why is that?”
Saiki took a deep breath. My orgasms are different from that of other men. Do you remember what happened when I had allergies?
“You almost destroyed the dorm with every sneeze!” Teruhashi clapped a horrified hand against her mouth as realization struck her. “Don’t tell me that’s what would happen if you-?”
As expected, this part was a bit awkward for Saiki to confess. Yes. During my… experiments, it’s a similar outcome.
Teruhashi’s jaw went completely slack. Then a hysterical giggle escaped her before she could stop it. Saiki saw exactly what had flashed in her mind’s eye, and despite how gruesome it was, it would’ve been darkly funny if it hadn’t involved the two of them. He looked away awkwardly as she quickly composed herself. “That - that would be a problem. No, that would be…”
Deadly. Or disfiguring, if not lethal.
She sighed and tapped her chin. This was an unexpected problem in their love life, and she slowly took it in. Okay. One thing at a time. “So, then… Say the explosion wasn’t a problem. Would we be able to, then?”
Birth control would still be a problem. My sperm move fast enough to break through condoms. And spermicide wouldn’t be able to kill the sperm. They’re as invulnerable as I am.
Saiki could hear her reeling thoughts. Oh, this has to be some kind of horrible joke, right?! God, I thought you loved me more than this!
Me too.
“Oh! How about birth control that I take?” Teruhashi brightened up. “Like the pill, or the shot, or… something.”
That would prevent fertilization, but there’s still the danger of my orgasm. Saiki wanted to disappear into the ground; never had he thought he would be having such a disappointing conversation with a lover about the dangers of his own orgasm. Part of him wished he’d been hornier as a teenager, so he could’ve discovered and solved this problem before it caused issues in a relationship. But his sex drive had been understandably non-existent until he was able to see people as something other than meat nuggets… and by then, it was too late.
“Why don’t you just wear your ring?” Teruhashi tilted her head at the ring that sat on his nightstand. “You do wear it when we make out from time to time.”
There’s still a chance of my powers bleeding through when I use it. It’s not a risk I want to take, especially since I won’t be able to control my abilities when I climax.
Teruhashi’s face was still red, but it was more out of frustration now than lust. She leaned forward and rested her chin on her hands. “So, what, we can’t make love unless we’re willing to risk pregnancy… or death?!”
I wish there was an easier way around it. But I don’t think it’s a good idea to take that risk. Even if there was no physical danger to you, we just started college, and starting a family as broke students is a bad idea.
“You’re right,” Teruhashi sighed. “It’s just frustrating. And I can’t think of any birth control options that completely eliminate the chance of pregnancy, short of more invasive solutions…”
We’ll figure it out. Saiki knew she needed reassurance, and he took her hand in his. I’ll come up with something.
“Well, no matter what, I’ll always stay by your side.” She smiled at him weakly. “Even an obstacle like this is nothing. I still love you… even if we can’t make love at the moment. Besides, it’s not like we can’t be intimate in other ways.” She set the pink bag aside. “We can always save this stuff for later.”
Saiki put his arm around her and pulled her close. He appreciated her nobility, and he knew she was telling the truth, but he could also sense her sexual frustration. He didn’t want to further upset her by showing his own feelings, but this barrier frustrated him as well. Their time together had shown him how enjoyable and important physical intimacy was in a relationship, and now it felt like the rug had been pulled out from under them. Assuming their relationship lasted for the rest of their lives, which Saiki had faith it would, would they never be able to consummate it? Would they never be able to have children?
It was times like this that Saiki wished he were a normal man who could just go to the doctor and get a prescription or some other solution to this situation. But no one in the world understood his anatomy, or the powers he possessed, so there was little chance of…
It was then that the solution hit him, hard enough that his eyes glazed over and his lips parted. Teruhashi’s eyes widened in concern. “Kusuo, what’s wrong?”
“I know the solution,” he muttered. The only person I can turn to for help…
God is cruel, indeed.
—
Kusuke had just started on his third cup of coffee that day when his younger brother spontaneously appeared before him. “Kusuo, what a surprise! Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to visit?!”
There were faint bags under Saiki’s eyes, as if he’d spent the rest of the night in turmoil over his chosen course of action. But there was no hesitation in his mind’s voice as he came forward and put his hands on his brother’s shoulders, making such an unexpectedly vulgar demand that Kusuke promptly spewed hot coffee everywhere.
Saiki’s not worried. Such an immediate and unwarranted, blatant, word-for-word denial. Teruhashi, Blessed Child of God, can handle this. He just… followed? In case? Even though she can handle it?
Alright, so Mr. Kusuo, our Unreliable Narrator, lied. He did follow to teach them a lesson about trying to dredge up dirt on Teruhashi, but she has things under control…
…Until she doesn’t, at which point he immediately plays the hero by drenching those depraved club members. No unflattering photoshops of Teruhashi on HIS watch.
It’s hilarious because he tries so hard to deny his concern for other people. It’s okay to admit your worry, Saiki… even when it’s not their physical safety at stake, but their reputation; and we know there are many other instances in which Saiki would’ve just walked away.
Like half a dozen other animes, I’ve finally bent to watching Saiki K long after its peak and I am in love. It’s hilarious, the cast does great, and it’s a crime against humanity that season 2 didn’t receive an English dub. Expect to see a Saiteru fanfic from me soon.
I fuckin love Teruhashi. Like, I just love her. She’s so silly and could have so much depth if the show wasn’t so slap stick (which I do love. But she could be more. All of the characters could be so much)
