#unwind dystology
Hayden [young, naïve]: I hope something good happens!
Hayden [now]: I hope whatever bad thing happens is at least funny.
Lev: Miracolina gave me a get better soon card.
Risa: Aw, that’s sweet!
Lev: I wasn’t sick. She just thought I could do better.
Hayden: "Hold the fuck up" I say.
Hayden: I am the fuck up.
Hayden: Please hold me.
Lev: Are you a practicing homosexual?
Hayden: I don’t need to practice, I’m very good at it.
Grace: When I was younger I tried to form a gang once.
Connor: How’d it go?
Grace: It turned into a book club.
Starkey: [breathes]
Hayden: I’d tell you to go to hell, but I don’t want to see you there.
Lev: Have you tried yelling?
Miracolina: I have no idea what you’re referring to, but of course I’ve tried yelling.
Connor: You’d do that for me?
Argent: I’d do a lot of things to you.
Connor: …For- for me?
Argent: Hm? Yep, that too.
Grace: wait, so Cam kissed you and you said “thank you?”
Risa: Yes.
Grace: Well, that was very polite.
Lev: Do you want my help or not?
Miracolina: No!
Lev: Too late.
Bam: You know, Freud said that 90% of all human behavior is motivated by sexual impulses. But come on, you know, give me some credit. I’d say at least 30% of my behavior is motivated by advertising and the rest by violence in film.
Hayden: For me, it’s 98% getting my dad to love me, 2% chocolate.
Miracolina: Please, I’m begging you, let me die.
Lev: [wags finger like an Instagram makeup artist]
Hayden: Did you see my underwear?
Connor: No.
Hayden [grabbing at his pants]: Did you want to?
Miracolina: There’s literally nothing I love more than Lev—
Lev: Hey, Miracolina.
Miracolina: Lev, shut the fuck up, I’m trying to tell people how much I love you.
Connor: You look depressed.
Hayden: Thanks, it’s the depression.
Lev: Feels like you’re being a little harsh.
Miracolina: Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh, I’ll turn it up.
Risa: What’s your blood type?
Cam: How should I know?
Risa: How could you notknow?
Cam: Who am I, Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood types?
Miracolina: sorry I was late. I was… doing things.
Lev: [slams open the door, noticeably disheveled]
Lev: SHE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!
Kirk: I know you sneaked out last night, Connor.
Connor [thinking]: Play dumb!
Connor [out loud]: Who’s Connor?
Lev: Well, when I’m with a girl I like, it’s hard for me to say anything cool or witty. Or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away.
Connor: It’s not that bad.
Lev: No, it is. I think girls are more interested in a boy who can talk.