“Thanks for inviting us. A triple camping date was totally the best way to introduce Samson to everyone,” Victor says. He continues down the trail, holding his boyfriend’s hand. He is joined by Chaia and Maria and Kai and Juliet, both couples clasping hands as well.
“Of course. Maria and I love it here. It’s the only forest in the state she’s not allergic to,” Chaia responds. She stares down at her wife’s hands, unconsciously scanning them for hives.
A sudden noise rings out in the distance.
“What was that?” Juliet asks.
“I don’t know. It’s probably a bird,” Kai reassures her as the group turns right along the trail. To their right, a creek flows from the waterfall at the end of the trail.
“Hey, can we pause so that I can tie my shoelace?” Samson asks.
“Of course,” Victor replies. He reaches his arm out and leans against the trunk of a big oak tree.
The sound rings out again. This time, it’s noise is more distinctive. The sound is the firing of a crossbow.
“Everyone get down!” Kai shouts to the group. He crouches down and shouts into the distance, “We are people not game!”
Juliet is rushed down by Kai and Samson stays low to the ground after tying his shoe. Chaia is taken down by the sudden weakness of Maria.
“You know how I said that Maria doesn’t react to this forest? Well, I was wrong,” she says, laying Maria flat on the ground and opening her backpack. She pulls out an emergency kit containing Maria’s rescue meds, a pulse oximeter, and a blood pressure cuff. “Maria, what’s going on?”
“I feel faint and my arms are itchy.” Maria’s arms and face slowly turn a shade of bright red.
“Okay. I got you, Mar.” Chaia slides the blood pressure cuff onto Maria’s arm and clips the pulse oximeter onto Maria’s finger. She digs through the med bag and pulls out a box of benadryl. “Blood pressure is a little lower than normal, but I don’t think that you’re in anaphylaxis right now. Take this.” She hands her wife a bright pink chewable tablet.
“Wow, Chaia you are so good at this,” Kai remarks. He pauses for a moment, then says, “Where’s Victor?”
Victor’s legs remain near the tree he had leaned against, but his upper half had not lowered when the rest of the group ducked. Victor cannot duck, as his left hand has been impaled by the cross bow’s arrow and stuck to the tree. “Up here,” Victor manages, pained.
Samson and Kai rush to their feet to attend to Victor. “Oh, babe, that does not look good,” Samson remarks. “But we are gonna help you. How’s the pain?”
“Bad.”
“Can you wiggle your fingers?” Kai follows up.
Victor attempts to move his fingers against the blood-stained bark. He grimaces in pain. “Not really.”
“Okay,” Kai responds. “Chaia, do you have pain meds and an ace bandage in your bag?” “I’ve got both.” She digs through the bag and pulls the items out.
Samson lightly grasps Victor’s right hand. “As you probably know, it’s not safe to remove the arrow until we get you to the hospital, but we do need to detach you from the tree.”
“I don’t like where this is going,” Victor replies.
“We have to do it,” Samson replies, sending a knowing look to Kai.
Kai grasps the edge of the arrow while Samson pulls Victor into a restraining hug.
“No,” Victor pleads, as Kai lightly wiggles the arrow free of the tree.
“I need to move your hand up to ensure that it stays on the arrow when I remove it from the tree, okay?” Kai didn’t wait for Victor to respond. He slowly slid Victor’s hand up the arrow just enough for him to fit his hand between Victor’s hand and the tree. Victor cried out in pain.
“I know,” Samson whispers to Victor. “We’re almost done.” Sampson gives Victor a reassuring (and more restraining) squeeze.
“On tree, we move off the tree,” Kai tells Victor. He lightly laughs at his own joke. “Get it? Like three? No? Okay. One, two, tree.” He pulls the arrow out of the tree, making sure that Victor’s hand did not come off the arrow. Once again, Victor screamed in pain.
“All done,” Samson told Victor. We’re gonna wrap it to hold the arrow in place and you can take some ibuprofen for right now. Let’s take this triple date to the hospital,” he says, watching Chaia help Maria to her feet.
idea: scene with two characters eagerly stripping each other clearly about to bone, but they keep getting interrupted by finding carefully concealed weapons in each other’s clothing, so they keep just unholstering, revealing and unstrapping increasingly ludicrous amounts of hidden guns and knives as the clothes come off, and it’s lowkey killing the mood a little
Alternatively: it’s not killing the mood at all but it’s totally making both of them giggle like they’re twelve and possibly get lowkey competitive in a subconscious way about who has the most to drop.
The more that I think of it the more I’m seeing the incredible intimacy of letting someone know where you keep your backup knife.
Like my god, the trust involved in letting someone undress you and learn your secrets instead of popping into the bathroom to change where they can’t see and hiding all your weapons under the sink
…Oh
second alternative: you go to hide all your weapons under the sink but there’s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink.
awkward
It’s not that there’s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink that makes it awkward so much as that there’s so many weapons hidden underneath the sink that they fall out of the cabinet with the unmistakable sound of a knife-alanche, and then the other person comes in like “I can explain!” and you’re just dead-ass standing there with your own armload of weapons like “I can also explain.”
scene later in the movie - one of the characters pulls out a knife, it’s not one of theirs, they laugh and use it anyway
Later on, the other character wants their knife back and the first doesn’t want to give it back because it’s so well-balanced, they’ve never had a knife this nice, and it’s played almost exactly like the character swiped their SO’s hoodie.
Don’t mind me I might just write this as a story
… also the word “knife-alanche” is killing me /pos
