You became my happiest memory. Nothing can erase you.

If you don’t know what to say, let’s talk about weather. If I say it’s cold, I want to kiss you.

Confessions of a Perfektionist (1)

“I had it all planned out, you know? Aways knew who I am and what I want. Always knew what to do and where to go. How I’d act and what kind of people I’d befriend. Where I’d live and what I’d work on. How many pets I’d have and when I’d have them. Just… who I would be.

But now? With you here? You’ve inflicted so much chaos in me; so many emotions. And I don’t even know what I’m thinking anymore. And If you’d ask me to I’d throw everything out the window.

And I mean it. All of it. All I’ve worked on the past years-no my entire life-.All that I had planned and all that I had yet to do. Just …everything.

Without a second thought. Without looking back.

And I’ve never been more scared.

I’ve never felt more alive.”

Based on/an opposite side to this post which I received from @iwishforausername

My hand on your shoulder

We all love the feral x calm ship, right? Where one can openly and publicly express their love while the other hates any form of PDA?  And in general, we like that the calm one is able to calm the feral one down and prevent them from doing something stupid and regrettable. But sometimes–I think–in certain situations, that would not me the case. Sooo what if…

The Protagonist tried to not fall into the deep slumber they so desperately needed after another one of these pointless meetings, that are more complaints about insignificances rather than discussions of the actual plan. They had hoped that the 5-minute break would calm everyone down a bit but to no avail. 

Even from half across the entrance way they could see how tense their Partner was–and even worse: they could hear how thick faced their Partners current …conversation partner was as well.

The Protagonist sighed. They knew how hard the past few meetings had been on their Partner and how little they were able to take off their shoulders, their heart and mind. Today had been even worse than all the other meetings. 

And now this? 

Before they could even think of going towards them; to lay a hand on their shoulder in silent support or a give them a warm look, acknowledging their current stress; their Partner, who had lasted the past days without doing so, had finally blown up at the person in front of them. 

Not being the only one to have noticed the show currently unfolding, everything and everyone seemed to suddenly speed up and the crowd, that had been quite divided just minutes ago, quickly gathered in shared excitement and curiosity.

But before the Protagonist could dwell on it for too long, one of Opponents supporters had run towards them, yelling indignantly: 

“This is getting out of hand! Protagonist! You’re the sensible one! Aren’t you gonna stop your Partner?!?”

The Protagonist sighed once more. 

The Opposition and their Supporters have not only been a menace to their Partner but to everyone else in the meeting as well– including the Protagonist. They had slowed down all their plans immensely and `working together` seemed to be foreign words to them. So, no. They couldn’t lie and say they weren’t satisfied­­–even amused– just a bit to see someone finally snapping at their rude associates. Especially if that someone was their Partner.

So, trying to keep their amusement in check, they answered with a small smile: “Why? They seem to be able to handle this just fine!” 

The Other clearly hadn’t expected that reaction. Clearly had expected them to immediately fold and apologise on behalf of their Partner instead. Like they usually would, when their Partner would start a fight or discussion that quickly got out of hand. So, with a dumbfounded expression and a higher pitched voice, the Other countered: 

“ Uhh?!? Cause they’re beingmore than rude and unprofessional towards My Associate?!?!!My Associate, who is in very high regards of everyone involved and beyond ?!?”

The Protagonist tried to not roll their eyes. But the more the Other`s word sank in, the more the more than rude implications of their words sank in. Their previous amusement had long vanished, yet their serene smile, they were so well known for stayed edged on their face, holding none of its usual warmth.  And when they finally turned towards the Other, their voice was still as light and calm as ever, yet with just enough of an edge to it, that it seemed to throw the Other off. 

“Wasn’t My Partner the one, who stayed calm, while being insulted to their face? Wasn’t My Partner the one who let them go on in their triad about how ‘impossible they’re to work with’? When all my Partner did, was point out some of the flaws in Your associates plan? Flaws that not only would’ve sabotaged the entire plan but also created an even bigger catastrophe then the one we’re trying to prevent. “

The Others eyes had went comically wide in fear and their complexion lost its colour. But they did not dare to answer. 

Pity them; cause the Protagonist was not yet finished.

`How dare these people constantly judge their Partner for things they pride themselves on? How dare they provoke and ridicule others, when they have only scraps to show off for? When they piggy-back on other people’s success? No. Not any longer. `

The Protagonist took a step towards the Other, gaze focused now entirely on them. 

“So pray tell: What am I supposed to stop My Partner from doing? From taking part in a meeting discussing a very. Important. Plan? One where they are a vital part in? Or do you mean stopping them from pointing out all. Those. Flaws in your plans? From preventing a catastrophe?” 

Another step.

“Or on a more basic level: Am I supposed to let My Partner take all of the uncalled-for criticism without a word? When you make your opinion known at even a single. Drop. of tea. Poured incorrectly?”

The Other was now so clearly in distress that even the associates around them had noticed it. Feeling the stares on them, as well as being sure the Other would not try to suggest such a thing again, the Protagonist turned back to their original position. Their gaze locked with their Partners. An equally curious and surprised expression painted their face. 

The Protagonist decided, they did not like the latter component of that expression. 

Not one bit. 

Acid seemed to suddenly fill their mouth and lungs. 

Why was their Partner surprised? How had they failed their Partner so much, that them, openly supporting them, seemed impossible?! That they still thought, they stood alone?!? Especially during such open confrontations and intentional ridicule of their person?

They had to do better.

To be better. 

They vowed right here, right now–to themselves and their Partner–that they will forever and always make their support clear. 

That no one can make a fool of their Partner. 

So, when they addressed the Other next, they made sure that even the last attendee could hear their voice loud and clear. And while it was spoken with the same calmness, they were known so well for, this once, it send shivers down peoples spine and the room suddenly felt colder.  

“I’d like to think that you and your people are not that arrogant to believe, that you are the only ones allowed to defend themselves?”

With one last glace, a too sweet smile and a playfulness twinkling in their eyes, they added: 

“Are you not?”

The Other was now fully trembling, equally in shock and fear. And while the Protagonist did not enjoy inflicting such terrible feelings in others, they knew, that for their Partner, they would do it all again. 

And again. 

And again. 

Barley hearing the stutter of an answer they held their head up high and walked over to their Partner, whose love and devotion to them was for once openly and publicly written all over their face. And when they finally finally laid their hand on their Partners shoulder in silent support, all they could think was:  

No one should wear such a beautiful, loving look, by some simple public support. 

Least of all their Partner. 

Their Love. 

They´d make sure of it. 

fanfic writers be like “is anyone gonna save this character?” and then not wait for an answer

Appreciate yourself and follow this account! Okay? It’s hard to imagine worlds nobody has ever dreamed of and put them to paper. You are amazing. You have talent! Even if it’s not something you can showcase like singing. You are still talented and every bit as important