It’s possible to be bi and happy, bi and at peace with your sexuality. Your life as a bisexual can be full of love and people who support you, don’t be afraid to reach for what you deserve.
The study checked how bisexual, pansexual and queer women define bisexuality.
Pansexuals and queer women said that bisexuality is binary and means attraction to cis men and women and they also “felt that claiming a bisexual identity indicated an outdated, offensive belief that there are only two genders”.
whereas actual bisexuals defined bisexuality as broad and inclusive of all genders.
It’s also interesting that all the people claiming bisexuality was transphobic were cis whereas the trans people interviewed didn’t have a problem with the bisexual label.
In addition, bisexuals expressed that they found the debates around whether bisexuality is inclusive very upsetting and it made them consider hiding their bisexuality or changing their label.
“While experiencing one’s chosen identity as personal and meaningful was not unique to the bisexual women in our sample, bisexual women often described an added layer of psychological distress upon learning that others define bisexuality in ways that reinforce a traditional gender binary, which contradicts their own definitions and lived experiences of bisexuality.“
i am losing my mind at the people trying to “debunk” this with scientific sounding arguments such as “the sample size is too small to mean anything” - literally the most anti-science thing you can say
1. it displays that you have no understanding of basic research concepts such as the difference between quantitative and qualitative research, what they’re used for and what kind of sample sizes are viable for them
2. trying to dunk on peer reviewed research with a snappy one liner because the findings make you feel bad or clash with your pre-existing beliefs
As a former PhD level social scientist, I need you all to know that a good sample size for a social science study is 30-50 people. In my extensive experience, it’s really only valid to consider the implications of sample size when the study is <20 people (and as OP noted, this doesn’t apply to qualitative research!!! At all!!!!! No numbers, pals!) There is not infrastructure, funding, or other resources to create the kind of massive sample studies you see in medicine. That doesn’t mean you can’t do good research with <10,000 people. Also, if your stats are good enough to make it through peer review, your sample size has likely been taken into consideration properly. If you don’t know much about scientific papers, you can learn, or you can sit down when people talk about peer-reviewed research.
Edit: I’m sorry I’m just REALLY mad about this, the cited study had 25 participants who did interviews. Do you have any IDEA how much labor goes into transcribing and coding that much interview data to analyze? No, you don’t. You don’t even know what coding is if you are sniping about 25 participants. 25 is a lot of people for an interview-based study, JFCCCcccc
a handful of additional points
1. people saying you cant generalize this to mean all pansexuals are biphobic because the small sample size and qualitative nature of this study means it doesnt represent larger trends: sure, maybe. but what it does prove is that it exists. there are pansexual people whose understanding of bisexuality are biphobic and differ from the definitions of bisexuals AND that this difference causes tension and distress to those who do identify as bisexual. it may not be representative of every pan or bi person, but it does prove the existence and lived experiences of relevant people. (as an example, i would not discredit a qualitative study that interviewed 20~ single mothers about their experiences with the available social structures on their city and their effectiveness in supporting single mothers, simply because the sample size is small. their opinions are still reflective of real life issues that real life people experience, and that is worth acknowledging and considering.) so if you’re saying this isn’t generalizable, you’re right! but it wasn’t meant to be and doesnt have to be. if you’re saying it is useless and social sciences are bad as a result, i need you to consider that even the most niche group of people need their struggles considered and validated in the social sciences. small as the sample size is, if its a problem that exists, it deserves to be documented and discussed and if possible fixed. if there are 10 separate single mothers saying social services suck and theyre living in poverty, we need to acknowledge that this is a real issue. the same goes for these bisexual people saying that they experience tensions as a result of biphobic understandings of bisexuality by pan people.
2. people saying “but i’ve never met a biphobic pan person” or “X person in my life is pansexual and i love them, vice versa”: good for you! thats genuinely great and i don’t want anyone to experience biphobia either, so im glad to hear it. at the same time, this isn’t (necessarily/always) a critique of pansexuals as individuals. this is a critique of the label that functions exactly the same as ‘bisexual’ but constantly aims to distance itself from bisexuality. in doing so, the meaning of bisexuality keeps getting muddied because people who are, essentially, bisexual keep trying to define themselves differently. this is how biphobic and tranpshobic definitions of bisexuality come about. and so i have to ask: if bi and pan are the same, why do some people prefer to identify as pansexuality? to say “it just feels right” ignores the element of social influences that people often subconsciously act upon (in the same way some women will say they get plastic surgery to feel confident, but if you asked them why they get the specific procedures that they do, or why they felt unconfident before, you find that the root cause is the social influence of the existing beauty standards that make them dislike how they looked while also making them want to look a certain way).
we do not exist in a vacuum - our choices are often influenced by the views of society, even when we think they aren’t. it makes sense to want to distance oneself from bisexuality when the label is so vilified. but distancing yourself doesnt allow you to challenge the stigma attached to bisexuality, instead allowing it to perpetuating while the people who do allow themselves to identify as bisexual are further villainized. to concretize this idea, consider the stereotype of bi people being exclusive of trans/nonbinary people. if i were to be someone attracted to all genders, i may feel like bisexuality doesnt fit me as well as pansexuality does. and i may feel this way subconsciously, without even realizing that it’s because i don’t identify with the stereotype associated with bisexuality. and so i decide to identify as pan, and when people ask why, i just say “it feels right”. and so i never question whether or not the stereotype is true, and i never challenge it because i don’t have to, now that I’ve decided to identify as the newer label that i feel is “better”, all without ever questioning why it is i feel that way. and if i, subconsciously, judge bisexual people as being transphobic in the future, well then so be it, i guess. and so when someone asks me whats so different between pan and bi, i come up with something that furthers the misunserstandimg of bisexuality, like “i care about hearts, not parts”, or “i dont just like 2 genders”, which erases the lived experience of decades of people who have called themselve bisexual all while miseducating others on what bisexuality means and furthering the stigma.
so i have to ask, if you identify as pan because it “just feels right”, what is it about bisexuality that you feel is so “wrong”? and i am begging you to ask yourself if the reason bisexuality feels wrong is because you have some unchecked stigma, misunserstanding, or bias against bisexuality as an identity. because if you didnt, i dont think you would consider it so bad when people equate bi and pan, or call you one instead of the other.
as a bi person I just have to say that the real emphasis they put on nick discovering and labeling his bisexuality had me in literal tears at 3 am. especially because at no point did anyone, especially charlie, question or criticize the idea of him being bisexual (a really unfortunate trope). media loves to either ignore or demonize us so this was just so refreshing and needed.
bi people can communicate telepathically with one another btw. it doesn’t even take a shared glance or anything. we can just do it. BUT the locked eyes adds flair, sometimes. little bit of drama. theatrics
“Featuring 9 different stories from 20 creators, Bi Visibility explores bisexuality from various different perspective with stories ranging from romance to high fantasy.”
Please consider checking out and backing this project! I recently did art for one of the stories included in it. I’ve read through the previews for the rest of the book and honestly was just left feeling so warm and fuzzy. I promise it’s such a sweet book with so much goodness <3
i think the thing that bothers me most about panseuxals wanting to be included in positive posts about bisexuality is that it seems like they only ever want to associate themselves with bisexuality when it benefits them. they want to be grouped in with us when we’re joking about how smart and hot and perfect we are, but they would rather draw a thick line between us when it comes to dealing with the hard stuff like all of the biphobic stereotypes (that they contribute to by trying to distance themselves from it!!!!). and i know that the pain of bisexuality isn’t what defines us, but i only want to share my bisexual joy with the people who are with me for the entirety of bisexuality including the bad
all in all though I’m very proud of bisexuals especially bi women for speaking out against biphobia and not allowing ourselves to be silenced these past several years, these spaces are obviously still pretty hostile sometimes but I think we’ve made a lot of progress and changed a lot of people’s minds.
like the amount of bi women who are openly using butch/femme, who are unapologetic about their attraction to men and women, who have stopped being self deprecating about being bisexual, who speak out against biphobia, it’s genuinely really nice. it isn’t perfect everywhere and in every circle but it’s no longer this pervasive sense of walking on eggshells to me.
exactly this. nobody was going to start respecting us just because we allowed ourselves to be doormats, if anything it just let people get away with more and more egregious shit.
bi people have done so much in recent years to educate others (and ourselves) WITHOUT having to compromise by walking on eggshells. so much more has changed since people started speaking out unapologetically.
you have to support bisexual women even when they willingly enter relationships with men and end up being abused I’m serious like it’s not a joke. please support bisexual women for gods sake. we are not asking to be abused. we do not to deserve to be abused. we are not stupid for hoping not to end up in an abusive relationship with a man. we should not have to avoid dating men in order to be safe from abuse as if that’s even how that works. for Christs sake as other women, as other wlw, as LGBT people, bisexual women need your support.
why do ppl get so mad when bisexual women talk abt men… can u mind ur business wtf do u mean “theyre only bisexual for men, its the male fantasy” what are you drinking to say shit like that
this is just my evil little bisexual opinion but not only is any cheesy annoying “cishet” pop nonsense love song improved if you imagine it either being sung by and for a woman, but it’s ALSO improved if you imagine it being sung by and for a bisexual, bonus points if you imagine it sung by a bi woman for a bi man.
i love taking the “what if a woman did it instead” and then pushing it even further. what if HE was MY babygirl.
Whether you believe bisexuality was inclusive of nonbinary people in the 1960s, or whatever the latest debate is, the fact is that the bi community has spent the majority of the last decade trying to make it clear that bisexual means or should mean much more than just “attraction to men and women”, and there has been very, very little push back from within the bi community. The general consensus is that the word “bisexual” should be infinitely broad and inclusive, no matter what the etymological root is. Bisexuals do not want “bisexual” to be limited.
The only people desperately trying to reinforce the idea that “bisexual means 2 genders” are people who do not identify as bisexual.
[ID: Two astronauts floating in space looking at Earth, which has the bisexual flag on it. One astronaut is saying: “Wait so bisexuality is the attraction to all genders?” The second astronaut is behind them, pointing a gun at them and saying, “Always has been.” End ID]
