#giuliano x simonetta

Giuliano: I can’t believe Simonetta blocked me on Instagram.

Sandro: *takes out phone* wait you can do that?

Giuliano: Sandro… what are you doing?

Sandro: Blocking your ass on Instagram.

Sandro and Giuliano but make it ✨Gen Z✨ pretty sure Giuliano would either shit post or have f-boy selfies, there is no in between

Giuliano: so you’re breaking up with me because I’m too bLonDe??

Simonetta: umm no, it’s because I don’t love you.

Giuliano: you know, I could just like dye my hair right??

Simonetta:

Giuliano:RIGHT??

I’m literally convinced this is how the breakup went down smh

Lorenzo: Giuliano has been with half of Florence.

Also Lorenzo: has had a mistress since he was a wee lad, a wife he repeatedly cheated on, a lass in Naples as well, and who knows how many more Ippolitas out there.

Well there are hypocrites and then there is Lorenzo the Magnificent

Simonetta: Messer Medici you will put the poets out of business!

Lorenzo: *recites his cucumber masterpiece loud enough for all of Florence to hear*

Simonetta: Oh…surely you knew that I meant Giuliano…he never mentioned your…talents

Giuliano: I don’t believe in love.

Simonetta:*exists*

Giuliano: *gives up on Imola and his whole family to have stolen moments with Simonetta*

Giuliano: pffft I so believe in love