listen I see your headcanons about Aziraphale loving sweets and cakes and pumpkin spice lattes with extra shots of syrup and what have you and that’s valid but consider:
Aziraphale takes his tea with no sugar
the two things that Crowley is specifically mentioned consuming in the book are angel cake and cocktails made from date palm liquor which, based on my extensive research, is basically the most appallingly sugary-sweet alcohol mankind has ever managed to produce
therefore I present the following counterpoint: Aziraphale does not have any particular fondness for sugary things (though he enjoys a bite of something sweet now and then), but Crowley has the world’s worst sweet tooth and tries (very very badly) to conceal this.
like, Crowley isn’t quite sure why, but he feels like he should be ordering coffee blacker than his soul
(which, like, he probably should stick to darker coffee because the lighter a coffee roast, the more caffeine it has and like, the poor thing’s got bad enough anxiety as it is, he doesn’t need to add high doses of caffeine to his system, but that’s neither here nor there)
but also like…. he Hates it, but insists on ordering it, because espresso strong enough to melt your intestines seems like the sort of thing the human Anthony J. Crowley would drink, so he gets it and he hates it and all he really wants is some double whip sugary caramel frappe Starbucks-y monstrosity that’s loaded with more sugar and dairy than your average milkshake and he’s staring sadly down at his ultra-concentrated cold brew cup of Bitterness™…
…only for Aziraphale to sigh and say “oh dear, this candy apple latte really seemed like the thing at the time, but it’s a great deal too sweet for me. You wouldn’t mind swapping, would you, dearest?” and hitting him with the big eyes like Crowley’d be doing him such a favor if they swapped drinks…
…and Crowley tries not to look too relieved, and gives a big put-upon sigh. “All right, angel, I guess I could take it off your hands”
and so Crowley gets his sugary-sweet disaster of a drink that barely even qualifies as coffee at this point because it’s more whipped cream than beverage, and Aziraphale hides his grin behind a calculated sip of the triple-concentrated espresso hell-drink
post-canon i really want crowley to let his sweet tooth flag fly and just make himself every kind of brownie that never seem to get stale and pour infinite sugar in his pale, milky coffee while aziraphale gags in the distance and still manages to be in love with him.
This is beyond valid and straight into Ultimate Truth.
I continue to search Tumblr for only the finest of Crowley metas and this one surely qualifies!
I like to always have at least one nerdy theory that is both visibly, evidently incorrect and also completely impossible to disprove. My last theory was that Rey was Yoda’s daughter. It’s laughably wrong but for a good solid few years there it was also impossible to refute.
I haven’t had a really great Prove Me Wrong theory for a while, but I think I just formulated my new one, which is that Taika Waititi wrote My Immortal.
ANYWAY you cannot convince me that the air nomads didn’t have any sort of trade good based on the flying bison and aang just didn’t have the time or safety to make and sell any of these while trying to stop ozai. they probably did so much spinning just because drop spindles are super transportable, it’s something to do while flying long distances, there’s always a weaver somewhere willing to buy yarn, and there’s always, always large amounts of shed fur just. around. look at how much came off of appa that one episode. so much fur
so three things happen the summer after ozai is defeated and appa starts shedding in earnest again
aang starts spinning and selling yarn because that’s What You Do and he’s clinging REAL HARD to every possible air nomad tradition because, well, who else will remember these things?
toph hears about this and scruffs him before he can sell too much because she’s a merchants daughter and holy shit aang do you understand what you’re selling?? yarn from the last known sky bison! the avatar’s own spirit guide!! spun by the avatars own hand!!!! what are you doing aang!!!!!! she has to drag katara in at this point because aang is real unhappy with the idea that his normal flying bison yarn of, uh, questionable quality is being sold to exclusive high class weavers so they can make shawls for filthy rich nobles for baaaaaank just on the basis of his name. this isn’t how the monks did it :/ and he doesn’t WANT a lot of money anyway! he’s a monk!! he only asks for what he needs to survive!! anyway katara manages to talk toph around to donating most of the money to reconstruction efforts, charities, and orphanages and convinces aang that having an emergency fund is a good thing and he should keep something.aang accidentally ends up with a reasonably full bank account and is really confused about how that happened, why it’s there, and what he’s supposed to do with it
there is a real weird period of time where it’s In Fashion for high noble ladies to have shawls and scarves dyed the same color as aangs clothes (because that’s how you know it’s made with special avatar yarn!) or have images of appa woven into them (can you imagine a shawl that’s just a full length body shot of appa?? amazing) and all the earth kingdom nobility are just rocking green and orange like nbd. weaving decorative shawls with slubby yarn becomes really in fashion, too, because aang is not great at spinning. he’s 13 and it’s boring, ok?
BONUS sokka is just. so mad. you could have been making bank with appa the whole time we were scrambling around the planet aang? do you realize how much more food we could have had? how many more hot baths?? how could you betray me like this
(probably the air nomads also did a lot of weaving but it was mostly the pregnant nuns and the really old nomads so it’s a little off aangs radar. and does aang eat cheese? it never comes up in series but I would also believe that the nomads made a lot of air bison cheese and bison butter tea)
headcanon accepted re: sky bison products
you said SPINNING on a DROP SPINDLE and i instantly went YES. OH GOD YES.
i bet sky bison yarn is really strong but probably not super soft - we see in the show that the fibers are really long, which lends itself well to strong yarns that can stand up to a lot of wear and tear (silk yarn is INCREDIBLE when it comes to being hard-wearing, and that’s mostly because silk is basically an INFINITELY LONG FIBER). But becauseit’s so long and comes from such a large animal, it’s probably really coarse and thick.
I’m imagining most of those high-class ladies would be wearing at least one layer underneath their shawls, because bison yarn is probably pretty itchy if you’re used to high quality wool, silk, or fine linen. Especially bison yarn spun by a 13yo who doesn’t really like spinning.
unless of course the air nomads bred their bison specifically for soft fur, but generally when you’re breeding for stuff like that, you need different breeds for different purposes. appa’s pretty clearly a long-distance riding bison, which would probably have been a different breed than whichever ones would have been bred for soft fur. most species of domesticated animal that are dual+ purpose (i.e. meat/milk/wool/transportation) have breeds that can only do one or two of those well, and the others not as great.
the air nomads obviously would not have been breeding for meat, because vegetarians. For long distance travel and a nomadic lifestyle I bet they would have wanted a travel/milk dual purpose breed, but because they can regulate their body temperature with airbending, soft warm yarn might not have been a high priority for that breed.
which is a lot of words to say “appa-fur yarn is ITCHY”
My impression is that the sky bisons aren’t actually domesticated, so much as semi-sentient and choosing to partner with the air nomads, so I don’t think they’d be bred for anything, much less soft hair.
I actually headcanon spinning as something air nomad kids would be taught to do from a young age to burn off energy and stress and make it easier for them to learn to meditate, so I think Aang would probably be decent at making yarn that’s evenly spun, but probably wouldn’t have the experience to make super fine thread.
I would assume that appa has a double layer coat like most high altitude herd animals, so even without selective breeding the insulating inner layer would probably be suuuper soft. just look up qiviut for an idea of how soft and expensive muskox fur can get, and the skeins of bison fur yarn I have aren’t noticeably different from something like alpaca. assuming that appa sheds a proportionate amount of undercoat to muskox or bison (up to seven pounds a year) there is going to be a LOT of snuggly undercoat to turn into snuggly Soft Things
and I’ve seen a couple people say that aang would probably have learned spinning pretty young and be fairly competent at it, and I agree! I def meant the questionable yarn quality to be a statement on his attention span and post-war schedule, not skill (I don’t really know how to spin so idk if constantly starting and stopping and not paying any attention anyway would effect the consistency any? it just Felt Right)
I’ve never spun anything like qiviut - the most exotic thing I’ve spun is alpaca, unless folks think silk is more exotic - so I didn’t think about the double coat! Don’t they usually need special treatment to separate the topcoat from the undercoat, tho? I wouldn’t be surprised if Aang either didn’t know or wasn’t very good at separating from them.
I *do* spin on a drop spindle, tho, and the biggest problem with stopping and starting often is keeping the single the same width, but you have the same problem stopping and starting ANY kind of spinning project. In some ways, a drop spindle makes it easier to control that than a regular spinning wheel - you have a lot more control over the fiber and the yarn you’re spinning, so you can be more precise. My drop spindle yarns tend to be very regular and compact, while my spinning wheel yarns are more varied and lofty.
However, now I’m picturing the moment when you spin your single a little too thin, and the drop spindle lives up to its name - from hundreds or even thousands of feet in the air! Plummetting off the side of the air bison, with the older nomads scrambling to catch it…
I can totally imagine that the air nomads hat special spindles with gliders (like his stick where he glides with) to spin with airbending as a practice for beginner benders, or in a similar stile as the hand spinning wheels from India, but for air nomads!
And wouldn’t the process from start to finish be a good lesson in great fullness? Like how long it takes from baby bison to clothes
Maby even a live milestone. From first bison who chosen you to your first own robe/Stola??
It could even be that the Air Nomad’s robes were MADE out of sky bison fur, if the under coat was a) incredibly soft (I bet they’d wear the over coat too just because they didn’t really care about worldly possessions and comfortability) and b) their only farm animal was the sky bison. That’s what the Air Nomad’s wear, is Sky bison wool clothes.
Also, to the person who said Sky Bisons would only shed about seven pounds a year, I would like to counter that idea with the fact that Appa is GARGANTUAN. He has enough room on his saddle to carry literally six or seven children and their equipment on his back without much complaint, of which these children are not too much smaller than adults. An ox or an Alpaca or a normal Bison are tiny compared to Appa.
Appa’d have a metric butt ton of under fur on his body. I’d say about twenty to thirty pounds of under fur, with more on top, at the very least.
ok so I didn’t know that supported spindles existed and YES, very much yes to those. I love that.
I was actually trying to say that if muskox shed seven pounds we could use that to extrapolate how much appa shed if he shed proportionate to his size, not that appa would only shed seven pounds
ok, adhd rabbit hole time because I just looked up the average size of muskoxen and the approximate size of appa and, uh. apparently muskoxen are 900lbs full grown and appa is ten tons. over TWENTY TIMES THE SIZE OF A MUSKOX. obvs that’s doesn’t actually tell us anything about appas actual height and length but that’s the only solid number the show gives us and thirty pounds of underfur is starting to seem pretty conservative. it might be closer to 120lbs???
which is a weird way to say that I bet the air nomads had lots of crazy air powered spinning contraptions (and I’m still assuming that anything they had that wasn’t easily transportable was dealt with by pregnant nuns and aang wasn’t really introduced to it yet) and they just churned out textiles. literally everything fabric the nomads used was probably bison fur in some way because there was just. so. much. fur.
Textiles Tumblr coming in clutch to build the air nomad trade empire
WHO SAID IT WAS OK TO POST SOMETHING THIS HORRIBLE!??!??
hahah wow brb straddling a fencepost
My first reaction was ‘Nice thought but there’s no way, Coulson is much younger than…’ and then I stopped mid-thought.
Because you know what.
You know what.
After Steve, the US government had to keep trying to recreate the Super-Soldier Serum.
And who
andwho
would be the FIRST DAMN PERSON IN LINE to volunteer?
They told us it never worked again. And that was kind of true. They never again recreated the super-strength or the gleaming pecs. But other things, they got right. They got the vastly delayed aging. And the kind of reflexes that make a man able to take out two armed thugs with a bag of flour. And the talent for leading through example. And they got the most important part, Erskine’s favorite part: the magnification of moral fiber, taking the loyalty and selflessness of a loyal and selfless man and making him into something spectacular.
We didn’t really see other First Ones in the show but I was just thinking, what if they’re just like really tall? Like Adora as She-Ra is really tall. What if it’s not not because of She-Ra but because that’s just what a regular First One looks like and Adora is actually short because you know, Horde ration bars through her formative years.
I want a short story on Fred and George staring at this blank piece of paper and trying to figure out why Filch would label it “Dangerous”. Then I want them going through every possible variation of “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” before actually hitting the right words.
Example: “I promise I’m gonna fuck shit up.”
Mr. Moony would like to ask Messrs. Weasley why they think such foul language is necessary to accomplish mischief.
Mr. Wormtail would like to inform Messrs. Weasley that they are getting warmer.
Mr. Padfoot would like to high five Messrs. Weasley.
Mr. Prongs would like to have a pint with Messrs. Weasley as they seem just like his kind of people. As long as they solemnly swear it.
But what if Anakin isn’t ignoring Kylo Ren? What if that great pull Kylo feels towards the Light is Anakin Skywalker desperately trying to save his grandson from his own fate, the way his wife and son tried to save him?
what if Anakin is literally constantly standing behind Kylo Ren, sputtering with ghostly frustration, going, “No! No! No! Do not do that! Do NOT do that! oh for fuck’s sake.”
This is almost certainly what is actually happening.
“Ben if you skewer my son-in-law with that lightsaber then SO HELP ME”
“Ben Solo your mother is blaming me for this, get your ass home and apologize now or I swear-”
And Yoda and Obi-wan are watching, shaking their heads. “Now you know how we felt,” Obi-wan says.
Yoda agrees: “A bitch, karma is.”
I love this. So many people can just totally see Anakin trying to strangle Ben from the afterlife.
Broke: Remus did his friends’ homework while at Hogwarts because he’s the smart one.
Woke: Remus Lupin is a mess of a person who could never do his own homework. He would copy off of his friends and random strangers, but, being smart, he would correct their work while he cheated and tell them they were wrong.
I would super love it if Felak-Gundu were, like, a mythological dwarven figure by the end of the third age, and none of them know he’s based on an elf who really existed.
Like in stories he’s a joly dwarf with a beard so full of jewels it looks more like an elaborate necklace, and in a comic mash-up of Finrod killing a werewolf with his teeth and Nargathrond falling to Glaurung, Felak-Gundu gets swallowed by a dragon but bites his way out, killing the dragon. And he has other silly adventures, because he’s mostly a story for children, and 2+ ages worth of bedtime story embellishment has taken place.
Elrond finds this out when he’s compiling his library at Imladris, and it is absolutely his favorite thing that has ever happened because of the giant game of telephone that is history amongst mortals. The dwarves he learns about the legends from just laugh at him when he tried to explain who Finrod was (You elves think everything is about elves!)
Celebrian collects illustrated childrens books about her great uncle the dwarf’s misadventures, and Elrond packs them and sends them with her when she sails to Valinor. Which means when she feels better she can have the joy of introducing Finrod to his alter ego.
Gimli is extremely skeptical of this when he hears about it from Arwen (I don’t think Galadriel would have brought it up in the limited time he knew her before she sailed), thinking at most, it’s such an old legend, they probably nick-named Finrod affectionately after the character if anything.
And then he goes to Valinor and there is an elf there who is his lady’s brother, who introduces himself in Khuzdul as the dwarven equivalent of like, Curious George (if that story were ancient) and he is utterly delighted!
chewbacca was definitely the best man when han and leia got married and he gave a long speech of wookiee noises that next to nobody could understand and han was definitely trying not to cry the whole time
Post-barn scene Sam finds Dean’s old ring and starts wearing it on a chain necklace. Outsider POV assume he’s a widow and Sam just smiles because even after death people are still mistaking him and Dean for a couple.
Headcanon that in Bajoran culture, it’s generally considered untoward to thank the Prophets for something a person clearly did on their own. Except when you really don’t like that person, and you want to imply that they clearly could not have done that thing without a degree of divine intervention being involved.
okay, but consider: someone else doing this TO Kai Winn
love the headcanons that are like “virgil is super stealthy and sneaky and appears in places all the time” but i think it’s even better if he’s stealthy and clumsy. he’s soundless when he wants to be but the moment you startle him, it’s bang bang thump thump trip halfway down the stairs and slam into the cupboard door. am i saying virgil is a cat? yes.
Axel could spend months planning a Very Important heist (one that’ll get him street cred and a whole lotta money) but then get distracted by the guard dog and end up missing his window of opportunity, because he was petting the very sweet and fluffy German Shepherd for half an hour.
do ya reckon tonks is so clumsy because she’s made herself slightly taller/shorter/broader/thinner than her natural self and so her centre of balance is slightly off?
Taller. She makes herself taller in order to be taken seriously as an auror.
I’ve seen a fair amount of fics about Stede who loves dancing, and they are awesome! I love reading them.
However, can I offer you the idea that Stede never liked dancing, since it tends to happen at formal affairs and has very little to do with the affection you feel for your dance partner, and everything to do about the image you have to project. It’s not fun. It’s boring, mentally taxing, and honest to god uncomfortable. Nothing good comes from dancing.
And then he meets Ed and, while reluctant to teach him (Stede can dance alright, he just doesn’t like it, okay?), he still goes for it. I mean, it’s Ed. How can he say no?
In the process of teaching Ed to dance though, the weirdest thing happens.
Stede shows him the moves, and fixes his posture, and holds Ed close. And he finds that he likes it. In fact, he loves dancing with Ed. It’s nothing like the stiff dances that he had to endure at fancy parties, where everyone was watching and everyone, including his dance partner, was judging his every move.
It’s nothing like that with Ed. They’re having fun, stumbling over their feet, laughing. Time passes in a flurry of movement and giggles, and Stede loves every second of it.
Turns out that dancing can be fun if you find the right person for it.
i’m just gonna pretend daft punk was in pacific rim. i’m gonna pretend that they pilot a jaeger called electroma bravo and they blast house music with the kaidonovskys and when stacker shows raliegh around the shatterdome he’s like, “that’s thomas and guy-man. french. they never take their helmets off.”
I think one of the most powerful things about Newt and Alby both leading the Glade is that they’re the only two who could completely decimate an argument simply by saying the arguer’s name in the tone that shakes them down to their core.
Minho and Ben arguing about the maps and Newt shows up and just says “Minho.” Done. Fight over, Newt wins.
Next thing you see is Gally raging about how the builders are screwing up. Alby just walks up and says “Gally.” Gally stops completely. Alby enjoys peace and quiet for twenty minutes.
