#hilarity

pol-ski:

.❤️

cisthoughtcrime:

fullmetalfisting:

butt-puncher:

fullmetalfisting:

obviously your cock is going to have to be out but thats how hermes would want it 

Needed to draw this

I also posted this drawing on its own

OMG?!

where is the lie tho

ambers-luvr:

“this reminded me of you” okay and you remind me of my future spouse, let’s get married

esoanem:

trashrabbits:

bewbin:

bewbin:

LETS BRING BACK 1337 SPEAK 

why do i even try 

I THoUGHT YOU MEANT THE YEAR

my l0rd, t3h p34s4nt5 4r3 r3v01t1ng! W3 mu5t s411y f0rth 4g41n5t th3m 4thw1th!

adjoint-law:

drtanner:

himborc:

butiki:

crunchbuttsteak:

crunchbuttsteak:

I got a tumblr, it really was quite great

I blog about a lot of things, but mostly what I ate.

I thought it was a sweet gig, it really was quite cushy.

Then they went and banned me, ‘cause all I ate was pussy.

I signed up on tumblr, I didn’t know what to expect.

I thought I could just post and not worry about being fact checked

But once my posts went viral, no one saw my genius

Now all they do is reblog and say “kung pow penis.”

I’m a YA book author, I have a tumblr too

I post a lot of info, for my tumblypoos

But then one day my time was up, I read it on the clock

And now my most famous post is about how I love cock

i made a tumblr, and it didnt go great

whenever i make a post, all i get is hate

arguing with strangers, it really is a slog

i know all about politics, i run a hentai blog

One day I made a Tumblr, now I’ve been here ten years,

I’ve stayed through every update that left the userbase in tears,

And I don’t regret a second, for here’s the truth, you see:

I’m not locked in here with you, friend; you’re locked in here with me.

…you’re looocked iiiin heeeeere wiiiith meeeeeee.

heroofthreefaces:

elodieunderglass:

elodieunderglass:

lakemojave:

inneskeeper:

lakemojave:

The reason tumblr should have a mutuals only filter for notifications is cause I wanna know which of you i need to demand reparations for my posts getting popular

Oh? So you don’t want a post to get popular? Hm. Be a shame if this post went viral, don’t ya think?

You know how Bilbo Baggins was just minding his own business one day and Gandalf just brought a dozen uninvited dwarves into his home

Hello OP nice house. what have you made for lunch.

OP do you have any cheese

Chip the cups and break the plates!
That’s what @lakemojave​ hates!

garbage-wizard:

memories I’d like to forget

official-german-translationen:

No matter how kind you are, German children are kinder

finalizer-psytech:

moodykyloren:

bottomkyloren:

have you ever written kylux fic in the form of a google search history

Hux’s search history: confirmed

I physically, bodily, can NOT.

zipstick:

bywandandsword:

tilthat:

TIL that in 1903 the New York Times predicted that building a flying machine would be possible in 1-10 Million years.

viaift.tt

To understand how ridiculous this is, the first successful powered airplane flew this same year, 1903

You’re understating how ridiculous

it wasn’t just the same year. it was nine days later

clinical-manners:

trashmonkey-mcgee:

numberlover1729:

kingscrown666:

clinical-manners:

theunfairfolk:

clinical-manners:

*places an orange just outside a fairy ring to see what comes out* science is more of an art than a science

*the orange grows legs and skitters away*

Fascinating results *places a banana in the same spot*

*clawed hand reaches out of the ether and drags it into the ring, leaving ragged claw marks in the soil as it disappears, back into the ether from whence it came*

“let’s go to the extreme.” *places a pineapple in the same spot*

Real scientists would keep putting an orange in the same spot to make sure the results are consistent before moving on to other fruits or different spots.

The only valid response to this post.

othersystems:

memewhore:

honeybabydichotomy:

honeybabydichotomy:

the fact em forster lost his virginity at the age of 37 and then was too busy having gay sex to write…inspiring

like he literally said this

funnytwittertweets: