#how to be alone

LIVE

It’s funny, I have read so may articles about what it’s like to live abroad. And almost all of them mention making friends with other foreigners. But what if you are the ONLY foreigner? And you can only speak the same language as a handful of people. And everything you see is in a language you don’t understand. I doubt many people will ever be in this situation but it happens to be the situation I’m in.

For those that don’t know me, I am an only child and an extreme extrovert. I remember times when I was little and I would call all of my friends to hang out and no one could play and I would have a mild panic attack thinking about how I had to be alone for the day. And my mom would be like, Lucy chill!!!……It’s funny, you would think as an only child I would be good at being alone but actually I was just good at finding people to be friends with. It really wasn’t until college that I could really be at peace with being alone for a day or more. So, China was a huge step, and I knew it would be.

Now, Im not trying to have anyone feel bad for me, I have made friends. I play volleyball with a group of people twice a week, I have lunch with a group of teachers 4 days a week but about 95% of my dinners are alone. Dinners were always important to my family. We always ate together, and we always talked about our day… So that’s why at dinner… I feel the most alone.

But being alone to the extreme… has really given me the opportunity to grow, more than I think anything else could. I have now found out how to be content alone. Notice I didn’t say happy, I am and will always be an extrovert and being around others brings me the most joy but as the extrovert I am, I have now found a way to be content alone…. Which is HUGE for me.

So for you extreme extroverts out there, it is possible to wake up in the morning with a smile on your face while feeling alone. Interactions with people are what bring me the most joy. So when that was lacking I just had to find new things to bring me happiness, like exercising, listening to music, and just enjoying the sunshine. Hegang has been a great challenge and I feel very lucky that I was given the opportunity to face it and learn how to make myself happy in different ways that don’t involve other people.