#incorrect criminal minds quote
Emily: do you ever do anything but whine like a little bitch
Derek: yeah.
Derek: sometimes I whine like a BIG bitch
Derek, flirting: I love your hair
Spencer, failing at flirting: thanks it’s genetic and unattainable
Emily: are you there God? it’s me. I have a question for you. What the actual fuck?
Hotch: so, I made the decision to trust Emily..
Hotch, a few hours later: a horrible decision really.
Luke: thanks cutiepie
Penelope: ugh
Luke: sorry I’ll think of one better than cutiepie. You’re my Angel…dust?
Luke: sorry that’s a drug.
Derek: I’m Catholic I will not kill it is wrong and goes against my religion and moral code
Spencer: Oh so your Catholic enough to not kill but not Catholic enough to keep it in your pants?
Penelope: I made a marshmallow you!
Penelope: see your arms are crossed because you’re mad all the time
Penelope: do you like it?
Hotch, tearing up: it’s fine.
Spencer: you’re the love of my life and my best friend. I’d do anything for you
Derek: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule
Spencer: absolutely not
Emily: self care is chugging a lava lamp
Hotch: NO
Emily:g l u g
Luke: sorry I’m late! I bought us his and her smoothies
Penelope, reaching to grab one: thank you!
Luke, pulling it back: the pink ones mine.
Spencer: the recipe says beat two eggs
Emily: in what? Hand to hand combat?
Spencer: must be?
Hotch: get out of the kitchen immediately.
Emily: hey how are you?
Hotch: please don’t make me think of my life
Hotch, on call: where are you?
Spencer: my limit. I’m at my damn limit.
Hotch:
Hotch: I mean your location.
Spencer: I don’t know how many cookies it takes to be happy but so far it’s not 28
Rossi: you shouldn’t be using a straw..
Emily: I know.. it’s bad for the environment-
Rossi: no it’s just a weird way to eat spaghetti.
*after Emily comes back*
Derek: WE ALL THOUGHT YOU DIED?
Emily: that was months ago. Things have obviously changed
Emily: good morning everyone, have a wonderful day :)
Derek: that sounds sinister and threatening
Emily: then have a horrible day you damn bitch.
Hotch: let me show you a photo from last night that upset me.
Emily: ok but I’m my defence Derek bet me $2 that I couldn’t drink all that shampoo
Hotch: that’s not what- YOU DRANK SHAMPOO?
Spencer: did you know it take 3 sheeps to make a sweater
Emily: woah
Emily: I didn’t even know they could knit
Emily: would you slap your best friend for a million dollars?
Jj: I would roundhouse kick you in the face for free
Emily, tearing up: I’m your best friend?
