Jimin lies on the bed. A complicated series of knots keep him spread wide for you as your hand whips at his thigh. A glowing red mark is left behind at the harsh slap. Jimin lets out a groan at the pain and squirms in his attempt s to recoil.
“So useless baby, can’t even take a little slap” your pout is mean as you lean forward to lick at the sore flesh, leaving a harsh bite in the middle, making him howl again. You loved him like this. So fucked out, barely able to form a sentence as you tease every inch of his flesh. So eager to please your every whim. You crawl up the bed leaving soothing kisses along his stomach, admiring the marks you left there earlier. You come to as top at his head. Knees straddled either side. He licks his lips at the sight of your dripping pussy, presented so tantalizingly close. He sticks his tongue out and tries to push his head forwards, wanting nothing more than a taste of you, his treat after being played with for so long.
“Not yet Jiminie,” You scold pushing his forehead back “You are to wait until I say so” you use one had to push his cheeks together, his lips forced into a perfect little pout. “Do you understand me slut?” he nods as best he can in your grip, and you release him, patting his face patronizingly. You arch yourself backwards and play with his dick, teasing him relentlessly as your clit brushes against the tip of his nose. He writhes a little underneath you, desperate not to cum. He knows he isn’t allowed without your permission. As you feel him stiffen, unable to hold it in himself, you let go. You return your attention to his head. Your hands find purchase in his hair as you lower yourself onto his lips. You pull at his blonde locks as a signal for him to start, and he does. He laps feverishly at your folds, drinking in your arousal as he whimpers from the taste. You tug at his hair, controlling his angle and focusing his attention where you need it. As always, your perfect little sub fails to disappoint. Your orgasm comes quickly coating Jimin’s face as you grind down, suffocating him just a little.
You pull back as the pleasure fades and reach for a towel to clean him.
“Are you okay baby? You did so good for me today, you were so perfect for me.” He is clearly still stuck in his head, his eyes unable to focus. “Let me take care of you baby and then we will go take a nice cool bath okay?” he nods, and you move to untie his restraints, looking over for any bruising left behind. When you are sure he is okay you slip between his legs to take care of his till throbbing cock. You carefully slip it into your mouth. Aiming to please, not tease, you take the full length and lick at the thick vein along the underside that you know drives him crazy. He is cumming within seconds, ropes of cum shoot down your mouth and leave a trail connecting you to him as you release his softening dick. You clean off your mouth with the same towel and find his favourite blanket out of his care box.
Wrapping him up tightly and stroking his face you whisper “Come back to me baby, you’ve been so good” he finally manages to meet your eyes before blinking a few times. A lazy smile crosses his face.
“That was so fun Miss” you lean in to kiss his puffy lips before leaving to run that bath you promised
BTS scenario/reaction - Sex/Sexual acts while one is asleep
Warning: blowjobs, sex with the unconscious, consensual sex, female oral, fingering.
Smut under the cut
Namjoon
It was clear you had tried to wait for him but they’d been delayed
You’d fallen asleep in sexy lingerie
A book by your side and reading glasses askew on your face
Mouth ajar with a little drool
You still looked undeniably sexy all dressed up or rather down for him
He placed your book to the side careful to keep your page
He slipped the glasses away desperate not to wake you before having a little fun
You had had an agreement for a long time that he could touch you however and whenever he liked provided there was no safe word used.
He turned you gently onto your back and spread your legs wide enough for him to lie in between
He slides your panties out of the way and flattens his tongue against your folds
You start to stir as he sucks on your clit and pumps one finger into you
“Hi Jagi, sorry I’m late.”
You don’t get a chance to respond before he is diving back in to make you moan for him
Seokjin
The clingiest man when he comes back from tour
Wants to do everything with you and for you
Cockwarming was something you did a lot during this time
An extra layer of intimacy you could share
Working from home, watching TV, playing video games
However this is the first time you’ve tried whilst asleep
Cuddly sleepers anyway it made sense
Until you’re awoken by his thrusts
Once you figured out what was actually happening you couldn’t help but be turned on
Jin was still asleep
Some wet dream being lived out in real time
You roll so he is on his back
Riding him through the dream and kissing his bare chest until he comes to
He doesn’t open his eyes, but you know the moment he wakes as his thrusts go from shallow languid rolls to deep forceful jolts
“What a wonderful way to wake up” he murmurs after finishing
Yoongi
You worked out early on in the relationship the best way to wake Yoonig up and not have to deal with a grump was a blowjob
He’d worked through the night again
Fast asleep his mixing desk
You squeeze yourself into the space underneath the table and unzipped his shorts
It’s so routine now that you can free him without him so much as stirring
You pump your hand along his hardening length before leaning in to kiss the tip
His breathing hitched as you tongued his slit his eyes flickering at the sensation
You could tell he was close to consciousness when he started to moan
His hands laced into your hair just as you took the last inch down your throat
“Good morning, Princess” his voice was still heavy with sleep
The sound mixed with the way he was petting your hair made you moan around his cock
Moments later he came undone deep down your throat.
Hoseok
Hobi was awoken by all your wriggling
At first he thought you were having a nightmare…
Until you moaned his name
He pulled back the covers to reveal your hand inside your pjs trying to provide some relief
Being the wonderful caring boyfriend he is, he thought he should lend a hand
He carefully removed your hand chuckling a little as you whimpered change your nose at the loss of friction
He cuddled close nibbling your ear lobe as his hand replaces yours
Your features straighten out again when he applies pressure to your clit
He whispers dirty words in your ear to influence your dreams
Dirty girl, so needy for me even in your dreams
Gonna come for me without even knowing
So wet for me
You mumble back “For you.” And Hobi has to check that you’re still asleep
You are
He gets more daring leaving his thumb on your clit and sliding his index finger through your folds dipping it inside
He thrusts the digit shallowly
Enjoying the little ‘o’ your mouth forms when he plays with a second finger
Every noise you make his music to his ears
He keeps his eyes on your face
Adding a third finger inside and curling each one as you stretch
The only change in you is the pleasure on your face
You cum in your sleep and Hobi isn’t sure he has ever seen anything sexier
He pulls his hand away and licks it clean taking note of how heavy a sleeper you are
Jimin
You awaken from your nap very disorientated feeling the heat pulling in the pit of your stomach and hands kneading your spread thighs
You can’t help the scream you release when you see the dark head of hair between your legs Jimin’s face peaks up smirking at you, lips covered in your cum
“Fucking hell Chim! You scared the fuck outta me” You half heartedly smack the side of his head
He was blonde when he left this morning
“Sorry baby. I’ll make it up to you.” He winks before reattaching his plump lips to your clit and sucking like his life depended on it
Two fingers scissor inside you
You’re not sure how long he’s been going at it but judging by the knot pulling in your stomach you wouldn’t need to go for much longer
The orgasm shudders through you
Thoroughly fucked out and oversensitive you hear the sound of a zipper
“My turn” he chimes lining himself up and you groan loving the overstimulation so soon
Taehyung
He woke so needy and desperate
In his half-asleep state he does the only logical thing
He put his leg across your sleeping body and starts using you for relief
You wake up when it starts to feel like you’re on a boat
You are unsurprised to find Tae with lidded eyes rolling his hips against your leg impatiently waiting for you to wake up
He has a way of asking for what he wants with actions and not words
You roll your eyes as he nudges into your arm
His boxy smile lights up his face when you agree
You rollover pressing your bum into him having forgone panties in favour of a long T shirt
He fingers you slowly for a while the motion relaxing enough to lull you back into a shallow sleep
Once he’s satisfied with your stretch, he hooks your leg over the top of him and lines himself up to you and rocks gently, finally content
Jungkook
It starts as a drunken bet between friends with benefits
“I bet I could make you cum in my sleep” he sounds so cocky
“But wouldn’t I be doing all the work? That would make you a glorified sex toy Hun.”
“OK, I bet I could make you cum in your sleep then”
“Without me waking up?.. You’re on”
Weeks go by and you forget but he doesn’t, plotting his time
You’d fallen asleep on his sofa after movie night and everyone else had already gone home
Through all the guys talking (and him accidentally hitting your head against the door frame when he moved you to bed)
It was now or never
He was careful removing your jeans scared to lose he hates losing
He starts tentatively rubbing your clit and watching your face for every reaction
The longer it goes on the braver he gets
Pinching your clit
Watching his index finger into you and feeling for the spot he knows drives you crazy
Your eyes flutter but you stay asleep
Finally he peels his gaze from your face to the matter hand
Just seeing how what you are for him gets him ridiculously wound up
All caution thrown to the wind as the blood from his brain go southbound
He slotted himself between your legs
Lapping hungrily at the juices
Diving his tongue in when he needed more
He ground himself against the bed seeking friction
Two fingers in
Sucking desperately at your clit
He felt you start to tense, a sign you’re as close as he had managed to get himself
He came in his pants as he felt you release on his face
Panting for breath he was a little relieved that you haven’t seen how easily he’d come all over himself…
I don’t know what this is honestly… @stealth-liberal and I were having a conversation about the fact that pineapples don’t actually make anything sweeter and now I’ve written this.
Maknae line x reader - Jungkook centric
Warnings: Male!Oral
It was quiet in the dorm…. Too quiet.
The elder members had all left for the day on a variety of different projects, leaving you and the maknae line behind. All morning you’d done nothing but laze around on Hobi’s bed where he’d left you, more than a little sore after last night. You were just thinking about taking another nap when you heard them. Giggling… or more gurgling? You almost didn’t investigate. Nothing good ever comes from their giggles, especially when the hyungs aren’t around.
Curiosity got the better of you though. You hauled yourself out of the comfortable nest you’d made in Hoseok’s bed and cracked the door a little to see if you were going to be caught in a crossfire. Finding no projectiles, you forged onward. No boys to be found in the living room, and the laughter definitely hadn’t been coming from their rooms. The only place left was the kitchen
Just as you’re about to open the door you hear Jimin talking.
“I think we can fit more in those bunny cheeks of his Tae… don’t you?”
“I don’t know Chim, he looks a little… full.” You open the door tentatively, not sure you wanted to know how they’d decided to torture your baby today. The sight that greets you is not one you expect. You weren’t really sure what you expected but not this. Three pairs of wide eyes turn to face you, Jimin and Taehyung stepping in front of Jungkook to try to hide their latest experiment. They seemed to have forgotten he was taller than them.
“Why have you stuffed him full of pineapple?” It looked like they’d been trying the chubby bunny challenge, subbing the marshmallows with tropical fruit. You cross your arms, trying to look at least a little bit intimidating. None of them tried to answer you. Jungkook’s face was turning red from the strain they’d put on his cheeks. “Kookie spit that out.” His eyes widen impossibly wider as he shakes his head no.
“Good boy.” Jimin praises him.
“Seriously tell me what you’re doing, or I will call Joon” you threaten.
“Yeah? What do you think he is going to do about it?” Jimin challenges.
“Fine… I’ll call Yoongi.”
“We just wanted to know if it was true.” Tae finally answers you. You throw him a quizzical look, not quite catching his train of thought. “You know, the pineapple and cum thing?” He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly unable to meet your gaze for a moment. You can’t help but laugh at the ridiculousness of it all.
“And to do that, you decided that the best course of action was to stuff Jungkook’s mouth full?” You ask reaching forward and pushing his cheeks together just a little. A dribble of pineapple juice trails from the corner of his lips and you can’t resit the urge to scoop it onto your finger and taste it. “Don’t you think it would work better if he’d just eaten the fruit?”
“Well that’s part of the experiment. He eats it like that, Tae eats it normally, and I drink a load of juice.”
“Right of course, logical.” You shake your head. “And how are you going to test this theory?”
“We are going to blow one another.” Taehyung states, like it’s obvious.
“But won’t you all taste of pineapple? And how would you know who tasted the most pineappley?” They all deflate a little when you point out the flaw in their master plan. “Perhaps you just need an impartial judge?” You don’t give them time to process what you’re saying. Instead dropping to your knees and pulling the waistband of Jungkook’s sweats with you.
You fist the base of his cock, pumping carefully before leaning in to lick along his slit. He moans a little before choking on the pineapple still in his mouth. Jimin graciously pulls a plate off the counter for him to spit the half-chewed fruit on to, but his eyes don’t leave you. All three of them just staring at you. Once he is fruit free, you take him fully into your mouth. A string of curses leaves his lips as you reach the base, swallowing a few times before pulling back.
One hand reaches towards his balls, fondling them gently as your mouth slips back down his length. You gag a little as his hips jolt forward to meet you, and apparently that’s all it takes. Jungkook cums in you mouth, you draw back to make sure some of it gets on you tongue, displaying it for them before gulping it down and standing back up.
He reaches for your hair, but the others stop him. They hold his hands to his side, preventing him from obscuring their view. You look up and watch him squirm in their hold, desperate to take a little control, make you go deeper. You giggle around his cock, the vibrations making him whine and tense. It never takes long to get Jungkook riled up, not like this.
“Hum…. Doesn’t taste any different to me” you say, swiping your fingers at the corners of your mouth before sucking them clean. Each of their eyes followed the movement. “Maybe we will have to try when it’s been in your system a little longer. You give them each one last look over, chuckling at the obvious bulges straining against Jimin and Tae’s pants, before sauntering back off in the direction of Hobi’s room.
It takes each of them a moment to unfreeze.
“Y/N WAIT!” You hear, followed by three sets of feet thundering to reach you first.
This was meant to be a drabble…. Guess I’m doing some one shots too ♀️
Warning: teeniest mention of abusers in form of a spell to get revenge, nothing graphic
It had taken you a long time to find this ritual. Your college thesis was about cult followings and the use of romantic spells amongst young women. You had spoken to over 100 women about their relationship with the occult. Most that replied to your advertisement had dabbled in small spells, little love chants, and apple peal initials. A few however had mentioned the large tome that you had come in search of.
These women claimed that the magics this book contained were real, and dangerous. Because of this each one refused to tell you where they had found the unique grimoire, only telling you they no-longer had it in their possession. All their warnings did was intrigue you more. It took you weeks to track down a copy, which is why you are now sat in a tiny bookstore 3 towns over. You were the only customer in the building, and the elderly checkout clerk had barely looked up from the knitting she was working on when the bell on the door announced your entrance.
The occult section had its own room at the back of the store, volumes of texts stretched far above your head covering the walls. Luckily, the book you had come for stuck out against the rest. It was bound in black leather with a purple trim, a heart dripping blood was emblazoned on the side. In fact, it looked hauntingly real. You pull it off the shelf and place it on the table. Running your finger along the spine gives you a fierce electric shock.
First you open to a random page. ‘How To Skin A Man Alive’ the title reads, in graphic detail it explains what is needed in order to perform the ritual
1. The wrath of a woman abused
2. A weapon taken from him
3. Velvet ropes
4. A blindfold
5. An athame
You turn back to the index before reading the terrifying gore you are sure is about to follow.
The incantation you were looking for was to fix unrequited love. In your studies you had found this was the most common use of romantic magics in your target demographic. You find the spell quickly almost as if your finger was drawn to it.
‘How To Bring Them To You’ even for an ancient text this page was beaten up. The corners curled in and some of the diagrams were barely legible. Weirdly, the charm itself seemed to be in mint condition. To cast the spell, you only needed four candles and thoughts of your beloved. It was overwhelmingly simple, so simple you had to try. You found candles easily in a chest in the corner. You set them in the shape suggested on the page and committed the chant to memory. The problem with simple spells however is they can easily go awry from lack of focus. You gave to much attention to saying the words and not enough on the thoughts of your beloved.
You finished the verse and the flames went out, spooky but not cause for concern. Through your research you had found very little evidence of these things being anymore than an empty wish. You are scared out of your thoughts by the clearing of a throat behind you. A young man with an impish grin is stood in front of the door.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise anyone else was here, I was just playing around” you say sheepishly rubbing the back of your neck.
“Darling, don’t you know you shouldn’t play with magic?” a blush creeps up your face as he makes eye contact with you. There is a burning intensity behind his eyes that makes you want to go to him. “I’m Jimin, and I believe you called for me.” He laughs as confusion crosses your features. “Oh, silly girl, you didn’t pay attention did you, your thoughts weren’t clear enough and instead of summoning the one you want you summoned them… or well me” he moved forward placing his hands on your arms. The touch burns you in the best possible way, a small whimper escaping your lips. The noise seems to feed him, his eyes flash red for a moment before returning to the inviting chocolate that you had been staring into.
It feels like your body is moving of its own volition as you lean into the stranger. Everything about him is enticing his scent, his clothes, his pink plump lips… your eyes close as you go to kiss him. He obliges you with a lazy kiss. You let out a moan as his tongue snakes into your mouth. You jump in shock when you feel the forked split against your own tongue.
“I didn’t think it’d be this easy baby, some put up a little fight first, confusion is a terrible mood killer” he chuckles more to himself then to you. You are too hypnotised by his presence to fully comprehend his words; all you know is you want him. You go to kiss him again but he stops you “Now, now, dear we have plenty of time for that, first I need you to snap out of my thrall, it’s much more fun for me when the pleasure I inflict is all your own” He pinches your cheek roughly shattering the rose coloured fog it felt like you’d been stuck in. “Tell me, do you still want me?”
“Yes” there was no hesitation in your words. It was clear that this man was not human, but it was also clear that he was the hottest thing you had ever seen. Even without the thrall all you wanted was to taste more of his skin. He made no attempt to wait once the consent was out of your mouth. You were his now.
He pulled your clothes from you with no resistance and kissed down your stomach to your thighs. He pushed you back onto the chair you’d been sitting in when he materialised and spread your legs for access. His fingers slip straight up your slit gathering your arousal and using it to rub at your clit. The sudden roughness of his ministrations make you gasp, and you watch his eyes flit red again. He doesn’t take long to run his long tongue along your heat. The sensation makes you shiver as you melt into his touch. His long tongue finds its way inside you causing a new level of pleasure you had never experience. He fed off every moan that tumbled from your lips as he worked you closer and closer to your first orgasm. Your high is ripped from you unexpectedly as he pulls away and you whine at the loss.
“I’m sorry darling it’s so much better for me if we cum together” he reasons and pulls you from the chair. He backs you into a corner against the books and traps you there. Kissing you roughly this time, making you taste yourself in his mouth. His clothes had disappeared whilst you weren’t paying attention and he rubs himself against your entrance. He is big, you aren’t sure how big because he won’t let you pull away from his kiss, but the thought of him inside you scares you.
You don’t have time to fully realise your fear as he lifts you and lines himself up. The stretch burns and tears form in the corners of your eyes. He shushes you and strokes your hair soothingly with the hand he isn’t using to support you. The burn starts to ebb, and like he can sense the change he begins to move. Starting slow, the anticipation is almost unbareable but he can’t keep himself slow for long. He losses control and becomes feral. Your head bounces violently against the shelves as he chases his high. Still you can feel your orgasm approaching as your vision fades in the corners. He releases rope upon rope of hot sticky cum deep inside you and holds himself there for awhile as he recovers. His eyes slowly revert to brown as he comes down and he puts you back on your feet, making sure to hold you so you don’t fall.
“Sorry dear, I usually have more composure than that, but you are just so delightful” his tongue darts out and licks his lips “I’m so glad you’re mine now” You’re head shoots up at that
“what do you mean yours?”
“You brought me to you, now I get to keep you, that’s what you consented to” He shrugs acting like it’s the most normal thing in the world “I will see you soon my darling” he winks at you and with that disappears from the room.
Part of the anniversary drabbles! Author: Admin E Warning: Smut Word Count: 1.5k
The brick wall he pushed you against felt cold against your back despite his leather jacket hugging your shoulders loosely. It didn’t bother you though, in fact, it felt nice to get some relief from the burning heat surging through your veins as he dragged his thick, plump lips over your skin. The wall only cooled you off a tiny bit, not nearly enough to extinguish the fire burning you alive when his fingers around your hips tightened and he rolled his lower body into yours. An involuntary whimper escaped your lips before you knew it, your mind so foggy and clouded it was hard to remind yourself of where you were.
‘Jimin…’, you managed to sigh out, your arms locked around his neck as he still laved yours with his tongue, the wet muscle dancing up and down the sensitive spot beneath your ear. You felt you throat getting dry, making you repeatedly lick your lips to moisten them before you made another attempt at speaking.
‘We shouldn’t be doing this here…’, you gasped when his teeth dug into your flesh, shooting an electric shock straight to your core.
He finally pulled away so you could look at him. You were panting frantically, it took alot of energy to fight the urge to just let him take you right then and there.
He looked incredibly sinful, his lips shining wet from exploring your skin with his tongue, eyes halflidded with lust, the red neon light of the nightclub sign contouring his hair and facial features to make him look like a demon in the night. He smirked as he traced your bottom lip with his thumb.
‘You wanna get out of here then?’, his voice laced with seduction and husky from arousal.
You nodded fiercely, grabbing him by his collar and yanking him back to crash your mouth on his one more time, just to satisfy the need for his addictive lips for a moment. He fished his phone out of his backpocket before gathering the strength to separate his lips from yours.
‘I’m calling a cab. My place or yours?’, he asked while hastily calling the number of the taxi company, clearly growing more impatient with every passing second of not devouring or being devoured.
‘Don’t care, just hurry!’, you whined, shoving down the neck of his tank top to helplessly nibble and suck at his collarbones, earning you a deep groan from him as he anxiously waited for the torturous dial tone to stop and someone to pick up. He sighed in relief when he finally heard a voice on the other side of the line.
You spent the following 10 minutes, what felt like hours, waiting for the cab and trying not to tear eachother’s clothes off until the car stopped in front of the club.
You practically jumped inside, rambling off your address to the driver and getting back to eating eachother’s faces on the backseat, ignoring the judging looks the older driver threw you in the front mirror of the car. Fortunately, your place was fairly close and you arrived at your appartment 15 minutes later.
‘Thank you sir!’, you quickly threw some bills on the front seat while already in the process of climbing out of the back. ‘Keep the change!’
‘But miss, this is 10 bucks too many!’, the driver muttered in confusion.
‘Don’t worry about it!’, you yelled in your haste to leave just before you closed the door and pulled Jimin along towards your front door. You pulled out your keys and struggled to find the right one right away, the excitement making your hands tremble and your fingers clumsy.
He slammed your body against the wood, his hands groping your ass and you were afraid you weren’t even going to make it inside when he started attacking your neck again, clearly his favourite spot to take his frustrations out on.
‘You didn’t have to pay for the cab, you know, i could’ve-‘
‘Park Jimin, shut the fuck up and get inside before i’ll ride you into my front step right now.’, you growled dangerously when the right key finally turned around in the lock and you managed to open your door, accompanied by Jimin’s delighted chuckle.
What happened after that was a blur of stumbling, tugging on clothes, slamming into walls, entwined limbs, colliding teeth, messy kisses and surprised moans until you finally gave up and settled for the carpet on the floor in the living room.
‘Fuck how can anyone be this hot?’, Jimin groaned as he practically ripped your dress, too impatient to deal with the zipper properly, ‘Why is it that i just need to fuck you senseless every time i see you?’
You were too busy desperately working on his belt and unzipping his jeans to answer, this was all taking way too long for your liking. You finally managed to pull his pants down, along with his boxers, revealing his rock hard erection as it slapped against his stomach immediately. It made your mouth water, the heat burning between your legs turning into a bonfire as if someone threw in a bottle of white spirit.
‘Jimin, fuck me!’, you yowled, your panties soaked and ruined by now. They were already good for the trash before the cab even came, but you honestly couldn’t take it anymore. You dramatically rubbed your thighs together to get some friction while Jimin still struggled to get your dress off.
‘Fuck!’, he muttered in frustration, the tugs on your zipper getting shorter, agressive and full of resentment for the small, metal thing.
You looked longingly at his hot red, hard cock, leaking precum and begging to be touched, so you decided you couldn’t wait anymore.
You lunged forward on your knees, your hands wrapping themselves around his shaft before you took the tip into your mouth. Jimin gasped in surprise, his eyes wide and his hands stilling around your zipper. You gradually took more of him inside your mouth until his tip hit the back of your throat, making his eyes roll back in his head.
‘You’re not helping!’, he moaned half frustrated, half enjoying. He squeezed his eyes shut as your tongue massaged his length, hollowing out your cheeks and sucking hard each time you went up, only to clench your throat around him when you reached down until your lips touched his base.
His hands fell limp against his sides as he gave up trying to unzip the damn dress before they tangled themselves in your hair. He threw his head back in bliss, finally giving in to the amazing pleasure of your lips girdling around his length, the various pressure of your skillful tongue sending him into nirvana.
His lewd noises and adorable whimpers got your arousal trickling down your thighs, your core aching for release as every sound he made shot through your eardrums and straight to the pit of your stomach. You couldn’t help but slide your hand down your panties, helplessly trying to relieve some of the tension building between your thighs.
You rubbed your clit vigorously, a happy moan sending vibrations through his shaft and making him shudder, until he noticed what you were doing.
‘Are you…Touching yourself?’, he rasped, the pupils in his eyes dilating until only a small outer circle of his iris was visible.
‘Mhm.’, you confirmed, mouth stuffed with dick as you were ready to take him all the way down to your throat again if you weren’t suddenly pushed down flat on your back.
‘J-Jimin?‘
‘Shh. Fuck that stupid dress, keep it on.’, he growled lowly while he shoved the fabric up around your waist and literally ripped your already ruined panties apart. ‘This will do just fine.’
He threw your legs over his shoulders, diving head first inbetween them and wasting no time licking up your juices like you were a melting popsickle, the slurping wet noises flushing your cheeks in embarrassment. His tongue darted out to find your small nub, sucking on it, gently nibbling until he had you a moaning mess underneath him, and it’s only been 10 seconds.
‘As much as i love to eat you out, i’m at my limit here.’, he groaned before crawling on top of you, his hand pumping his length a few times before guiding himself inside you.
You both moaned long and relieved, eyes rolling and mouths gaping when he filled you up to the brim.
‘Fuck…’, a shaky sigh rolling out of his mouth as he let himself get sheathed inside your hot, tight heat.
‘-ing finally.’, you added in a matching sigh, your eyes fluttering closed to savor the feeling of just being full.
‘Oh baby, we’ve only just begun.’, he smirked as he punctuated the end of his sentence with the beginning of a series of thrusts, the first roll of his hips into yours making electricity surge through your core. ‘And i’m not gonna let that dress stop me again.’
Warning: hardcore impregnation kink, possession, dirty talk, vaginal sex, basically a major creampie bro.
A/N: I’m going through major baby fever, so please enjoy my imagination
You felt Jungkook’s hands press roughly into your hips as he pounded you from behind. The sound of your husband’s groans and whiny sounds filling the air as your face was pushed into the mattress.
“You like the way that feels baby?“ He asked as you gripped onto your marital sheets. You tried to nod, your words failing you but your back being bent unnaturally stopping you. “Oh god baby” He moaned as he felt your walls flutter around him. You squeezed around him again unconsciously causing him to buck harshly into you, the angle causing him to kiss the base of your cervix, a shiver running down your spine as you let out a wanton moan. The movement caused Jungkook to pause. You grew worried and tried looking back only to see the man you called yours with his eyes shut, head tilted as you watched him breathe through his nose heavily almost as if to keep himself sane. You called out to him with a weak call of his name catching his attention breaking him from the trance he was in, you watched his eyelids open slightly, his usual coffee coloured eyes now a lustful black eyeing your sweaty body.
“fuck” He let out as his eyes moved from you to where the both of you were joined, his cock twitching slightly at the filthy ideas running through his head. “Look forward again for me baby” He breathed out, his voice an octave deeper causing a submissive whine to catch at your throat before turning. His hands gripped your hips even rougher, this time his nails digging into your skin before pulling his hips back slowly and bucking back into you, knocking the air from your lungs. He repeated this before your body started fluttering around him again and all his thoughts began to slip from his mouth.
“Fuck baby wanna fill you up so badly, so f-fucking badly” He moaned as he pounded into you roughly. You moaned in response which only urged him on even more.
“Wanna cum so deep in you baby, wanna fill you with my seed pretty girl” He rambled as he threw his head back losing himself in you. “Jungkook please” You whined not knowing what you were even asking for.
“You want it too baby hmm? want me to fill you up and knock you up?” He pressed, his words sending a shock into your system at the thought of him getting you pregnant. It’s not like you both hadn’t talked about it, babies were a subject you just both silently agreed on that when it happens, it happens and apparently for Jungkook it needed to happen now. “God beautiful I’m gonna put a baby in you, would you like that hmm? like my cock hitting your womb baby” He asked, his voice straining at the end.
“Answer me baby, wanna hear you say it” He groaned as his hand sneaked between your thighs and started began rubbing harshly at your clit. You tried to figure out what was going on in your head but the mixture of Jungkook’s fingers pressed against your clit and his cock hitting your cervix was too much for you. You could feel your climax literally on the tip of your tongue but the thought was stopped the minute you felt a harsh slap on your clit sending your hips to jolt forward. “Baby-I told you-to answer me” He punctuated with harsh thrusts. You gasped, your eyes filling with tears as you tried lifting your head to give him what he wanted.
“J-jungkook please, fill me with your cum, want your b-baby in me, make me yours” You gasped out, his shit eating grin practically beaming even if you couldn’t see it.
“That’s right baby, you’re fucking mine” He growled, his fingers back on your clit his hips angling to press even deeper into you. “Can’t wait to show you off, all big and round with my baby” He whined, his orgasm catching up to him as yours hit you. Now you’ve never experienced a vaginal orgasm but with the way Jungkook’s cock hit the end of you, your body just went into overdrive. You felt like it was everywhere, causing your body to shake underneath Jungkook like a leaf in an aggressive wind. The feeling of your walls convulsing around him aggressively had Jungkook growling as hips forced his cock into you. “Gonna cum baby, g-gonna cum and fill you. take it, fucking take it- Fuck!” He let out as he pressed into you till you could practically feel him in your stomach, The heat of his orgasm filling you to breaking point. You let out small whines as Jungkook moved his hips slowly milking his orgasm “so deep, so fucking deep” He whispered as he watched his softening cock fuck his cum back into you.
“You good baby?” He asked breathless as he fell down next to you. You slumped your body down, wincing at the aftershock. “Ask me again in nine months” You breathed still catching your breath, your eyes closing but not missing the way he beamed at your words.
Extra
“Kook, what did you do to Y/N, she looks so pale lately” Hoseok asked as he plopped down next to the younger, the boys weekly catch up at your home.
“Yeah, I offered her the left over eggs from my plate and she literally gagged and ran off” Jin pitched in as snatched the remote away from Taehyung before scolding him.
“All we ever do,” you draw mindless patters over the planes of his chest, summoning goosebumps over his skin, “is have sex.”
“Sweets,” he brings your hand which has been fixed on tattooing him as yours to his lips, kissing your knuckles tenderly, “what are you trying to say?”
Pouting, you pull your hand back but with greater strength, he manages to keep in on his chest in a loosely balled fist as a sign of crumpling opposition. You’ve never been able to resist him. And sly curl in the corners of his lips tells you he likes it, so very much.
“I’m saying,” you refrain from smiling from the triumph of having him suck in a deep breath when you hook your leg over his, grinding your shaven pussy against his hip, “I want us to go out,” he lets the hand slither out of his grasp and caress his neck the way you know will give you an easy pass, it’s his weak spot, “like on a date.”
You and your boyfriend try out a new form of role play, but it just keeps going wrong…
You realized how underappreciated you’ve become in your long term relationship and you can’t take it anymore, you want romance, you want excitement, you want to be wanted! So what happens? You find the courage to find someone better. You just hadn’t expected it to be Jeon Jungkook, who never took anything seriously, especially relationships. But that’s okay, because you don’t want a relationship, you want to be fucked. And that, Jungkook is very good at… ANYWAYS this is a lot of backstory for a shameless fic about getting railed a bunch of times.
Warning: sadist!jungkook, yandere!jungkook, masochist!reader, CONSENSUAL-NON-CONSENSUAL, if you don’t like that kink at all, then stop right now, because it is literally what the title of the story is about :’), predator/prey, bdsm, I am not an expert, don’t take this as a healthy portrayal of anything :), drunk sex, dubcon, rough sex, safe word use, gaslighting, breakup, really really bad sex that I truly find more triggering than the CNC :’), over-jealousy, toxic behavior, body shaming, reader calls herself overweight (I never use the other word), fingering, knife play, slapping, oral sex, anal, multiple orgasms, overstimulation
Word count:10.6k
—
“Any fantasies?”
You hesitate.
Your relationship with Jungkook was going well, perfect, actually. It’s probably the best relationship you’ve ever been in, you realize. Definitely the best sex.
It’s funny how what you thought would be a one night stand has turned into this: cohabiting with – cooking each other dinner, dancing in your kitchen to music, fucking in your kitchen to music, fucking on every surface of your shared apartment – and enjoying each other’s company even when you weren’t in each other’s company, when he was on his computer mixing beats and you were on your laptop writing, sharing each other’s lives and becoming the couple all your friends groan about because you can’t keep your hands off each other. Because Jungkook, like you, had a Guinness World Record breaking high sex drive. And almost Immediately, the very night you decided to hook up with your long time friend, you discovered how compatible you were in the bedroom as well.
But this, was a bit different.
FIRST TRY
You finish chopping vegetables for dinner, cleaning the cutting board under tap water. Your boyfriend comes up behind you covering your mouth first, pressing his body close to yours next, so forcefully the counter’s edge digs in your abdomen. You grunt against his palm as he pulls your head back, hand squeezing your breast harshly.
“Shhhh,” he calms you down, lips pressed to your ear, picking up a knife from the sink. You stay as still as possible when he runs the knife flat side against the front of your body, up your stomach, between your breasts, tantalizingly slow. And then lets the knife’s tip go under your shirt, turning it, slicing the fabric.
You gasp in surprise against his palm, your noises muffled. He tightens his hold on your body, voice deep, angrier, “Don’t make any fucking noise.”
Jungkook flips you around, pressing you into the wall between the fridge and pantry. Hands wrapping around your throat, straightening your body, he kisses you hard, pushing his tongue inside your mouth. You moan, opening your mouth wider, letting him have his way.
“You’re not supposed to let me kiss you,” he breathes in. Hands pulling at the torn fabric.
“Oh?Oh, sorry.” You moan, “I’m sorry, you’re just so sexy, and I want you so badly,” you speak between kisses, “I can’t help it.”
He smiles and sighs, carrying you to the bed instead. “We’ll try again,” you giggle. “I’ll be better, I promise.”
genre: fluff at the beginning, angst, deals with infidelity in detail (11.5k)
summary: do you think of love when the world is at your fingertips? or a story in which jimin dances on the dangerously thin line between love and obsession.
note: i do not mean to romanticize or glorify cheating in any manner, take this as a work of fiction only.
“we’ll announce the leads now, please come forward if your name is called, and if not, better luck next time” is a simple sentence really.
but your heart wrenched uncomfortably in your chest as you anxiously waited for the results. it was not like your entire life and career depended on those names.
you couldn’t stand still, neither could jimin as your hands wrung behind your backs and your weights kept shifting from one foot to another.
this is it.
this is what you worked and climbed ranks for, in the past two years.
you turned to the side to see jimin mirroring your expression, excitement danced in his eyebrows, but his lips stayed pursed, giving away how nervous he truly was. you couldn’t comfort him even if your hands reached him.
it felt all too familiar, jimin by your side, both of your palms sweaty as you wait for your fate to be recited to you.
‘the black swan’ was one of the hardest theatrical acts to get accepted into, only the absolute top and most talented even thought of auditioning here. once you are accepted, your future is secured, opportunities were expected to fall at your feet so everything is at stake here, especially the pride you both were cruelly robbed off when you first started.
“park jimin” you gasp and jump in your place when his name is announced, a huge grin growing on your face when you realize that jimin got the part he auditioned for; the black swan, the heart of the show.
you could see him trying to hold in his happiness, he still couldn’t scream, not with the officials in the same room and you couldn’t hug him either, so you just squeezed his hand and congratulated him in excited, hushed whispers. he can’t help but smile sheepishly at the floor at how much more excited you look than him and sends a silent thanks to the universe.
but his face immediately falls when he notices how they’ve reached the end of the list and your name didn’t get called.
he turns to look at you with concerned eyes, knowing in his heart how much you wanted this and how hard you worked for it, he isn’t surprised to see the disappointment instantly wash over your face.
everyone starts to leave, some crying, some buzzing with excitement. jimin was just worried because even though you don’t look sad, you wouldn’t look at him as you make your way through the crowd and outside the building, and he follows wordlessly.
he does not know what to do as you sit in the car with your gaze downwards, he knows that any words of comfort would just fall to deaf ears because jimin understood, better than anyone, what this audition meant to you. so, when you curl up on the bed still without uttering a word, jimin knows that he can’t just watch you suffer from your thoughts.
your gaze follows his movements as he gets into bed too, and you almost immediately crumble, reaching for him with desperate hands. he tears up when he hears your sobs against his chest.
this wasn’t how it was supposed to go, you both were supposed to get in together.
the plan was always supposed to do this together, like everything else you have done to this point.
“i-i’m sorry i’m crying like this when i’m supposed to be h-happy for you, i am happy for you jimin, and i’m so unbelievably p-proud. you, of all people, deserved to get that role” you whimper, feeling horrible for dampening his mood along with yours. “don’t be silly, you don’t have to hide how you truly feel, not in front of me.” jimin whispered, caressing your hair as your teardrops continued to soak the pillows.
for a moment, your sobs are the only sound in the room, jimin chooses to remain silent and just stay close to you, but then the piercing shrill of your phone startles you both.
jimin reaches for it, shrugging when there’s no name, and hands it to you. you sit up straight before clearing your throat and answering the call. “hello?” your voice remains surprisingly steady for someone who’s been crying their heart out and jimin just watches as your eyes go wide and your face morphs into a big smile, your hand flies up to your mouth, your eyes darting to him several times as you continuously thank the person on the other line before ending the call and looking at him with renewed energy.
“jimin, you won’t believe this” you shout excitedly as you jump to go next to him, he lets out a small chuckle and gathers you in his arms at your sudden change in mood and bouncing energy, and waits for you to speak. he is more than relieved to see the change in your mood. “what is it babe?” he rubs his fingers over the back of your hand.
“you know the ‘nutcracker’ play, right? the one sponsored by that big studio in france? well, they just called me and they want me to be the senior director for the show! they saw my audition at ‘black swan’ and wanted me to be a part of their play” jimin’s mouth drops open at your words with both joy and awe, being the senior director was something very few actual dancers were offered to be so if they were willing to give you that role, they must have bet a lot on you.
they were not going to regret all this faith they put in you, jimin was very sure of that much.
“see, i knew you would get there, one way or another.” he smiles widely that your hard work was paying off. “but it’s not together” you pout because you and jimin have always been a pair, it is one of the rare sentiments you have developed over the years. “i know, i wish you were my white swan” he sighs as he rubs circles into your hands, “there’s always next time?” you offer with a small smile and he nods, agreeing with you. “next time.”
in the past, even if you weren’t partners for the actual dance, you both were always somehow involved in the same act, either as the choreographer or part of the crew, you just were always in each other’s presence but that wasn’t the case now.
“i’m so excited” you sigh dreamily, just imagining how fun and new it would be to become a director. “i’m sure you’ll excel at it, as you do in so many other things” he kisses your forehead and you resist the urge to bury yourself into him. “i couldn’t have done it without you” you whisper back to him and jimin swears he feels his heart burst at your words, “i wouldn’t have even danced without you” he whispers back to you.
-
jimin takes a deep breath as he walks up to the large, fancy building where he would practice as the black swan. he walks in with confidence, knowing that he’s done his research on what his role entailed and which way he would have to transform for it.
upon entering, he is immediately whisked away to a dancing room with ceilings as high as the sky, he noted that the floor was also polished just enough for him to glide without having to stutter in his step. it’s every dancer’s dream practice room.
“ah there he is, the star of the show” a man, who would soon be revealed as the director of the show, hollers loudly when he sees jimin looking around the room. jimin breaks into a shy grin and the choreographer takes the time to introduce him to everyone involved in the play.
“and our other star, park hyejin, she’s the white swan, also your partner, you both will be working closely with each other so get comfortable, yeah?” the man winks at them as hyejin and jimin bow with a polite smile to each other. “i’ve heard a lot about you mr. park, i’m excited to work on this with you” she compliments jimin who humbly brushes it off with a sheepish smile.
when she looks away, jimin subtly notes how elegant hyejin looks, even without seeing her dance, he just had a feeling that her body lines were always flawless and her posture reflected the prima ballerina she was.
she reminded him of you, a perfect blend of determination and softness was shared in your faces.
he reluctantly looks away and laughs to himself a little, a few moments away from you already had him thinking everything was about you.
but jimin could have never guessed why he actually couldn’t look away from hyejin.
-
by the time jimin gets home, you’re already cooking dinner and dancing around in the kitchen with some jazzy 80’s song playing softly in the background. all of today was great but you are the true light in his day.
he wishes you always looked like this, so full of life and bursting at the seams with happiness.
“i’m home” he announces in a soft voice, face immediately brightening when you throw him backward with a hug. “how was your first day? were you nervous? how were the other dancers? the directors weren’t overbearing, right?” your barrage of questions tumble over each other and jimin just smiles fondly. “well, i can tell you everything if you let me babe.” he teases with a peck to your nose, and you purse your lips with a nod.
“it couldn’t have been better, like you won’t believe how huge their practice rooms are, just imagine our first ever practice room ever and multiply that by ten” he starts, you gasp at his description and patiently listen to every second of his day that he didn’t spend with you.
nor he or you notice that he leaves out the part about his stunning partner.
-
the next day jimin walks into practice, he is taken aback when he sees that hyejin is already stretching in the studio, she lifts her head at his presence and goes up to him. “good morning, mr.park.” he can’t help but feel a little shiver at her smooth voice, he also couldn’t help how his eyes travel across her poised body. now that she wasn’t wearing a flowy dress, her dance practice outfit didn’t leave a lot to the imagination.
he quickly looks away and he doesn’t bother telling her to be informal with him like he usually does with all his partners.
everything about her was so elegant, so put together, that jimin felt intimidated. he isn’t used to having such a qualified partner. not that he minded or anything, he was just always the more experienced one during acts he’s done in the past.
who was jimin to judge anyone’s qualifications anyway?
he greets her as well as he sets his bag down. he thought he was early but clearly not early enough.
during practice, both jimin and hyejin turn red when the choreographer tells them how close they would have to be for the dance. for more than half of the dance, their bodies remain stuck to each other, it’s supposed to symbolize how thin the line is between the black and white swan.
the thin line between love and obsession.
as they get into position, every single one of jimin’s senses is clouded by hyejin, his eyes literally won’t stop darting across her face
she was just so…beautiful.
and she looked so much like you?
why did she look like you when she was in his arms?
the music starts but that isn’t what gets jimin to move, it’s like a mind instinct to follow hyejin’s movements. the second she starts twirling, he pushes his body to follow her, desperate hands just as the black swan reaches the white swan. they don’t break eye contact once and the entire room feels heavy, heavy with their breaths, heavy with the tension growing between them, and for a second, it felt like it was only her and him in the room.
jimin hasn’t feel that way with anyone but you.
“i think you should be closer” hyejin whispers into his ear, with her hand wrapped around the back of his neck, and jimin freezes in his position, he thought they were impossibly close already.
he doesn’t think she’s just talking about the dance.
with a tedious scan of her from head to toe and then meeting hyejin’s sparkling eyes, he follows her anyway, his grip tightening on her waist and she hums in approval.
she sounds like you too.
this feels wrong.
this is wrong.
they start moving again, and jimin just flows with her, just like how he flows with you.
she’s not you but jimin can’t tell the difference between holding you and her. she feels the same, looks the same, sounds the same, and moves her body the same way.
but she’s not you.
a voice screams in his head that the woman in his arms is not the woman waiting for him at home.
“that was perfect, bravo to our swans!” the loud holler from the choreographer freezes jimin once again, face so close to hyejin that he can feel her breath on his face, steady and hot and for a minute, they don’t move. they don’t hear the rousing applause around them, their feet stay glued as they stare at each other and it isn’t until another loud noise around them that he pulls away from her, almost pushing her away from him because jimin doesn’t understand this feeling crawling on his chest.
why did she look like you?
why did she feel like you?
why do his eyes follow her as she walks away to leave for the day?
he doesn’t realize how hard he’s panting until his body starts to bend forward from how tired he feels.
he’s been with partners for dance before, but none were hyejin. he never had to remind himself that you were at home, waiting for him to come back, he never had to remind himself that you were in his life. he never had to actively think of you before, you were just always on his mind.
in a loving, dizzy haze, jimin somehow always felt secure that you were there in his life.
but now, felt scarily different to jimin.
because he didn’t think of you individually even once, not during the whole practice, not when hyejin got unnecessarily close to him sometimes.
he only thought of you when he found traces of you in the woman holding onto him for dear life.
and jimin almost hates it when he enjoys being so close to hyejin, he almost hates how his body jumps to be just as close to her, he would’ve fully hated it if it weren’t for how sweetly she smiled at him each time their eyes would meet.
jimin also hates that he finds himself smiling back at her.
-
you are more than buzzing with energy as you start your first day as a senior director, everyone was so welcoming and warm to you. knowing your experience, they didn’t question any of your suggestions. most of them immediately tried to see if it would pan out and put it into action, and it felt good to work in such a respectable and comfortable environment.
“the dancers should do a different formation for act 2, the same formation looks uninteresting. so try a newer formation, one that is fresh to the eyes, and let me know if there’s something i can help with” you instruct the choreographer who agrees and puts forth his ideas on how that can be improved.
you realized that you liked being behind the camera and below the stage just as much as you like being on it, and looking at the huge stage in front of you reminds you of one person; jimin.
who would’ve known that both of you would grow up to do what you’re doing now?
the ‘you’ from five years ago would have given everything and anything just to get a peek of the stage that you were now directing.
it made you feel warm, that all your pain and hard work didn’t get thrown into a ditch and you definitely couldn’t have done it without jimin.
your eyes stay teary as you drag your feet out of the audition room. it didn’t go well.
you got rejected, to put it nicely. but thoughts of what they said circle your mind in a taunt, ‘you have no talent at all, why did you even think of getting on that stage?’ it was humiliating, a punch to all the practice you did for the audition, a punch to the passion you so strongly held onto since you started dancing.
a soft hand grabs yours making you look up, jimin stands there with his lips set in a grim line and an evident furrow in his eyebrow.
you didn’t have to ask him to know that he got rejected too either.
you both look at each other for a second before crashing into a hug, heaving sobs leaving both your lips as you desperately grab onto him. his hands dig into your sides but nothing hurts more than being denied from something you thought you had.
how did both of you get rejected?
why was nothing ever enough?
you lean back from his face to wipe at his tears and hold onto his cheek, “we’ll get through this, yeah?” after he doesn’t respond, you get worried that your friend truly thinks there’s no hope left. “at 4, meet me in the school’s practice room, let’s practice till no one can say no to us” you say and leave him by himself.
morning comes slowly, and everyone is sound asleep when you slip into the dead night, jimin is already stretching lightly but his eyes are downcast as you approach him.
“it’s only our first rejection and i have a feeling that if we want to continue this, we have to be ready for much worse.” you say softly as you start stretching next to him, his arms fall beside him as he takes in a sharp breath. “i don’t think i can take anymore….maybe i should just stop here” you can tell it’s just his train of thought as he mumbles this but it stuns you that jimin would even think of leaving dancing behind over one rejection.
“are you sure? because you and i both know that you shine the brightest when you’re on stage, dancing your heart out” jimin on stage is a sight to behold, the way he tip-toes and catches the attention of everyone in the auditorium with a simple turn, was no easy feat and you couldn’t let him give up on it.
“it’s hard, i understand, i do. but i’m not letting you give up here, this isn’t the last audition you’re going to take and this is sure as hell, not the last time you’re getting on a stage” your words are stern but filled with warmth, they are directed to you and him. you can’t let him give up and you can’t give up either. jimin is grateful that you’re his friend as he passes by you and presses play on the music.
“you’re right, you always are” he mumbles with a chuckle and you smile with him. he reaches for your hand, giving it a light squeeze and you tighten your grip too.
“let’s prove all of them wrong” you move into position, “together?” he asks, breaking his position to look at you, “who else would it be?” you answer with a smile.
that was six years ago, that was when jimin was still just your friend, but with long hours of practice combined with celebrating your victories and failures together, you were bound to fall in love with him at some or another point. and he was always in love with you.
it was over a couple of bottles of soju and beer after the first time you two got roles in a local theater play, that he confessed to you in a dreamy, drunken haze. you still laugh at how quickly he sobered up when you said you felt the same way.
as you watch the dancers do their routine in a fresh new way, your mind subconsciously drifts to think about jimin and how he must be doing.
you were sure he was doing alright; it was jimin after all. if anyone could fully embrace the role, it was him.
-
contrary to your beliefs, jimin was struggling quite a bit.
it had already been three weeks since they started practicing and this week had been pure torture for jimin. as it turns out, hyejin was the perfect dancer, not that jimin thought otherwise but he didn’t expect himself to not be able to catch up with her. she practiced for hours on end, her body never faltered or missed a beat, while jimin had pretty good stamina himself, his body would give up on him from time to time.
and even if it were minor challenges, the nervousness that comes with starring in one of the biggest drama productions along with the need to stack up to hyejin now, was slowly building on him in a way he wasn’t sure he could handle anymore.
not to mention, he was still trying to navigate through this unusual feeling he had around hyejin, he hadn’t stopped thinking about her since that day, how close they were, how that closeness repeated every day with her. and after tossing and turning for nights on end, he put a label to what he felt for her while you slept peacefully beside him.
he felt attracted to her.
the kind of attraction that was so magnetic, so strong that it made him angry. he was angry that she pulled a move like that on him when she was well aware of his relationship with you.
but.
but jimin wasn’t out of the woods yet either, he not only reciprocated whatever she did, but he also didn’t do anything to dodge or discourage it. if anything, he encouraged her to advance further.
hyejin was slowly proving to be the root of all of his problems.
he sat down in the corner of the dance room after everyone had left, he recalls the disappointment flashing on the directors’ faces every single time he missed or skipped a step, and it placed a stone in his heart.
it wasn’t easy, trying to understand his own feelings while pushing his body to go further and do better.
he can’t lose this role; he can’t give up here but his body and mind are screaming at him to slow down.
he thought that if he got this role, everything would be perfect. he would work on getting a dance studio of his own, run it with you, propose to you and have a family with you, it was all mapped out in his mind.
but he didn’t think that just getting the role won’t help, he’s going to have to fill in the shoes of one of the biggest roles in the industry.
he was foolish enough to think he wouldn’t have to put in too much work to fill them out.
and he didn’t expect whatever was going on with him and hyejin, not even in his wildest dreams.
you were always his ride or die, someone, he could never forget and he hated himself for even looking at someone else through tainted eyes.
he can’t go further with hyejin, not even if it’s maddening to ignore the desires itching at his heart.
his thoughts are interrupted when a soft hand is placed on his shoulder, jimin doesn’t have to turn around to know that it’s hyejin.
“are you okay?” her tone is just as soft as her touch, and jimin looks at her with a bored face, his problems could have never looked more beautiful. “did you forget something?” his rude tone isn’t lost on her but she sits down beside him, which confuses jimin.
“it was hard for me too” she starts and jimin scoffs, he couldn’t believe that she was lying straight to his face. he had seen her practice and she never showed any signs of struggling. “i dance the way i do because i have put in precious time into it” she continues and jimin straightens up to listen to her. “the amount of practice i do, is punishing for my body. i held onto that harsh realization for a while but without punishing it, i can’t do better than i already am.”
it’s grim, love and passion just aren’t enough if you want to pursue your art. there’s always a price that comes with doing what you love.
his respect for hyejin skyrockets as she explains how she dances the way she does, but that’s quickly turned to dust when he remembers that he wouldn’t be this miserable if she wasn’t his partner.
didn’t she feel even the slightest bit of guilt for whatever she was doing?
she knew he was a taken man after all.
“that’s insightful, thanks” jimin’s reply is dry and he looks away after that, he fully expects her to scoff in his face and walk away so imagine his surprise when she giggles at him.
he cocks his eyebrow at her, waiting for her to explain what’s so hilarious about his clear frustration. hyejin sighs with a soft smile before turning to fully face jimin. “come on” she extends her hand to him and he looks at it questioningly, hyejin doesn’t wait for an answer as she takes his hand in hers and pulls him up.
again, jimin tries to convince himself that he doesn’t like it but he does nothing to move away or take his hand back.
“we will practice together and only go home when we can’t move a muscle” hyejin announces, letting his hand go to fix her ponytail and she smiles widely when jimin keeps his hand open for her to take again with a dumb look on his face. “don’t worry about meeting anyone’s expectations for now, just focus on me and the music, you have it in you jimin, you just have to believe your talent here.” jimin melts at her words.
you.
you used to talk to him this way whenever he was down.
oh my god, you.
what is he doing?
for that one second, you are everywhere in his mind, every nook and cranny of his brain crowds with thoughts of you and jimin feels unsteady again, but with one more tug from hyejin, everything he knows about you disappears just as quickly.
when they get close again, she isn’t the first one to smile this time, he already has a budding smile on his lips and it gets wider every second he holds her close to him. once again, they’re face to face and jimin sees you in her.
his grip falters as her grip tightens, her hands leaving his arms to caress the back of his neck before subtly bringing his ear close to her lips.
“we could be bigger together, everyone would die to have us in their show, we could do so much together, just imagine the sheer volume of applause they would shower us with,” she whispers to him and jimin listens like a snake to a snake charmer, he can only hear her.
together.
he believes in together, but that was with you.
you and him were supposed to be big together.
jimin looks at the floor, his arms loosening almost completely from hyejin and she frowns.
why couldn’t he see what she saw for them?
why couldn’t he see that he wouldn’t go too far with you? that with her, he could have the world laying itself in front of him? that together, they could run the industry without lifting a finger?
her last words to him have him convinced, she says it slow, she says it like the challenge she is and jimin finally lets himself say fuck it as he pulls her towards him, he knows from the smirk on her face that she doesn’t feel guilty at all, she rather enjoys it.
but jimin is no better when he matches her smirk.
“don’t fight what you feel for me jimin, you won’t win.”
it was the most perfect practice jimin had ever had.
-
that day, jimin stumbles into your home, feeling disoriented among other things. he can’t believe himself, he can’t believe his behavior, the only thing he’s grateful for is that nothing went beyond some groping.
but he shouldn’t be, that’s a pathetic thing to be grateful for. and it wasn’t innocent groping either, he knew he had done and fucked up everything.
“you’re home!” your cheery voice from a distance makes his step stutter, his heart resting unsettled and forming a dull ache.
how could he do this to you?
his face almost betrays him when you come into view. your smile is huge as you skip towards him, he guesses you had another successful day at work and his heart blooms with pride.
you have always been so good at everything you do, very much like hyejin in that sense.
no, no.
hyejin is like you when it comes to working only, you aren’t like hyejin in any sense though, you wouldn’t play with jimin’s feelings and mind the way hyejin did.
you look so happy, so oblivious to what he’s done and jimin doesn’t feel like he deserves to even look at you at that moment.
but he can’t be too obvious so he accepts your open arms and cheek kisses with a forced, broad smile on his face even if everything in him feels heavy with guilt.
“i got out of set early today, we only had minor things to take care of but you won’t believe how well everything is coming along. oh, and what is that you’re holding?” you grab the plastic bag hanging off his hands, immediately being greeted by the smell of your favorite food; wonton soup and tempura shrimp.
jimin couldn’t stop thinking about what he’d done, so bringing you your favorite food was a very underwhelming way to reassure himself that your relationship will be okay.
you squeal happily, taking the bag into the kitchen and thanking jimin a million times over your shoulder, telling him that you were just getting worried about dinner and that he’s your savior in a silly tone. jimin follows your steps, head hung low because again, you have no clue about what he’s done but he does. he remembers it all too well and has the very sudden urge to wash hyejin’s touch off his skin, but it will be in vain.
“don’t fight what you feel for me jimin, you won’t win.”
“jimin!” he hears loudly, his head snapping up to meet your worried eyes. “are you okay, my love?” you approach him with a slight pout on your lips, and jimin gulps when you hold his hands in yours. “you’ve been awfully quiet, is everything alright?” the soothing circles you draw on his skin and your downturned eyes filled with love, only drown in his heart in more sorrow.
he wishes he could tell you; he wishes he could cry into your arms and beg for forgiveness because jimin doesn’t know what else to do, he doesn’t know who else to go to.
with no response from him, you assume that he’s had a bad day at practice, he usually put himself through a lot of self-doubt and hate whenever he messed up during practice. “let’s eat dinner, yeah? and then we can watch your favorite animated movie, boss baby, would you like that?” he lets a small smile slip at the mention of his comfort movie and you take that as a sign to guide him to the dinner table with you.
as you start eating, you remind him that your anniversary is soon when you gush about these new cakes you two should try out this time and jimin feels sick to the stomach that he forgot about your precious anniversary which was approaching soon, it was always such a big deal for you both.
he might not spend another anniversary with you.
you fill him in on every detail from your play, that everything’s going great, the crew are incredible and responsive to your ideas and vision. jimin lets himself forget about what he did as he listens to you narrate things to him with the most excited look on your face.
“oh speaking of dancers, you never told me what your white swan is like” you innocently shove a forkful of food into your mouth, completely missing the way jimin’s fork falls on his plate with a thud.
he was not expecting that and he suddenly felt like the air around him got hard to breathe, how is he supposed to tell you what his white swan is actually like?
“she’s..alright” he offers with a shrug, trying to act nonchalant.
correction, trying to act like he didn’t kiss her.
you raise your eyebrows at him, clearly with no clue as to why he’s so unenthusiastic to talk about his partner. “is she giving you a hard time or something?” jimin almost lets out a mocking laugh at that sentence, that was one way to put the absolute hell she was putting him through.
but he quickly comes to the grim realization that she only put him through what he allowed her to.
it’s on him.
"no, she’s good at what she does.” she’s good at making me forget that i have to come home to you.
his short and dry responses mildly frustrate you but you don’t say anything, not wanting to make his day worse with your questions.
“jimin, are you sure everything’s okay?” you whisper to him when you’re later cuddling on the couch with boss baby playing in front of you. your concern for him stays from hours ago but he does his best to give you his brightest smile.
“don’t worry about me, i’ll be okay.” you should start worrying about yourself, he bitterly thinks as he kisses your temple and holds you closer in his arms.
who knows how much longer you will stay in his arms?
-
“heading home early?” your set producer asks as you start to pack things up for the day, you grin and nod in reply, there was no way anything could make you hide how excited you were for today.
“now, what’s got you so happy?” the choreographer brushes past you with a teasing smile, “it’s me and my boyfriend’s 6th anniversary today” you reply, the smile on your face never faltering, “boyfriend as in park jimin, right?” you happily hum in response and then everyone on set including the dancers, who are supposed to be practicing, make it their mission to tease you.
someone yells about how he hasn’t put a ring on it after so long and even if you laugh it off, you really do wonder why jimin hasn’t proposed to you yet.
“alright, alright, i’m leaving for today. if you need anything, send me a message!” you wave all of them goodbye and get into your car, the butterflies in your stomach fluttered gently at the thought of spending the rest of the day with jimin. it’s been so long since you spent proper time with him, both of you got so busy with your own work that you barely spent three hours together on a daily basis.
but you were positive that you would make up for all the lost time today. on your way home, you picked up the decorations and food, it was a tradition that jimin would bring the cake and you hoped that he would bring your favorite.
as you start setting up the balloons and streamers, you turn to see the time, it was already half past 7. your face falls into a small frown because jimin should’ve been home by now, you always met up at 7 and finished decoration together.
however, you reasoned to yourself that practice probably kept him late and decided to have everything ready by the time he’s home.
that time never comes.
your heart slips with each passing second that he doesn’t show up, you sit in a pretty dress on your couch with a sick feeling churning in your stomach that something doesn’t feel right, your fingers nervously play with the necklace hanging on your collarbones as you wait.
it was already 10.
jimin wasn’t answering your calls or messages.
you lay on your side and watch the clock tick by, jumping at any sound to see if jimin was home or not, and every sound was anything but him. you felt tired as you watched the minutes pass by.
for the first time, you felt unsure about the faith and trust you’ve put in jimin, it was for a brief second that you questioned every single one of his actions leading up to today but you snap yourself out of it.
jimin would never do anything to hurt you.
right?
jimin rushes out of his car, slamming the door and hurriedly locking it as he adjusts his jackets and makes his way upstairs to your home.
fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
jimin’s internal panic rises with each second, he really doesn’t think he can go lower in life than this. he shoves the key in with more force than he intended and pushes the door open, almost stumbling over his own feet as he makes quick, hurried steps to the living room.
his eyes fall on you soundly sleeping on the couch, he breaths out a sigh and leans against where you’re sleeping and on instinct, starts brushing your hair back as he fondly watches your lips naturally being in a pout.
is he really willing to lose everything he has right now just for a future that he’s not sure will be there?
his hand drops against your hair when he takes in how the living room was decorated in a lively way, he purses his lips as his eyes wander around every detail that you have put so much heart into and jimin felt like he failed you.
he turns back to you as you stir in your sleep and eventually open your eyes. jimin notices the relief flood in your expression when you see him.
“you’re home” you mutter so quietly that if jimin didn’t strain to hear you, it would have sounded like gibberish.
“of course i am” he smiles uneasily which doesn’t go unnoticed by you, but you get up anyway and jimin follows your movements as you sit upright on the couch.
you used to be so sure, that no matter where jimin goes, he will come back to you but something about tonight destroys that belief to tatters. and you hate yourself for going so extreme over one night but you can’t ignore your gut instinct telling you that something was very wrong.
you turn to look at the time.
3:00 A.M.
it was way past the time you and jimin agreed to meet but you didn’t want to ask him why he was late, you expect him to tell you himself, he owes you that much. but jimin doesn’t say anything either and he doesn’t even look at your face as you try to meet his eyes.
“did you bring our cake?” it was a simple question but to you, it was asking him if he actually remembered anything about today.
when he gulps and further lowers his head, you have your answer. and that answer falls like a rock in your heart.
“do you even remember what today is?” your voice is tired and laced with irritation but you don’t speak loudly, you don’t want to fight with him.
please tell me you remember.
“happy….anniversary” he offers pathetically and you want to scoff in his face at his lame reply. you were so excited for today; you hadn’t stopped daydreaming about tonight since a week ago and all of that crumbled down in a second.
“anniversary’s over.” with that, you get off the couch with unshed tears and start clearing the glasses filled with wine from the table. jimin watches quietly, the only sounds in the air being your light sniffles and glasses clinking.
he feels like he should say something.
“i didn’t mean to forget about our day,” he starts and when you don’t look at him as he speaks, he continues with an unsure tone, “practice just got so hectic and we were learning all these new moves at once, they didn’t let me go even when i begged.”
lies.
all lies.
there was no practice today, the choreographer had fallen sick so they just went over routines they already knew and everyone was let go in the early evening.
and let’s be real, no practice lasts till 3 in the night.
you honestly would’ve believed jimin until he said the last part.
jimin never begs anyone, and he was the heart of the show, a highly qualified and decorated dancer, if he wanted to be let off for one day, you know that no one would dare to say no to him.
but you let him lie because you can’t press him for a truth that he’s not willing to give you.
you continue to remain silent, moving to the kitchen and sighing as your eyes fall on the food that’s now cold, and jimin sees it too as he follows you in. the guilt that subdued because of his almost convincing lie returned with a vengeance, all this food must have been hard to prepare and the atmosphere remains heavy as you slide the plates into a trash can with a grim expression on your face.
you can’t shake the feeling of something being wrong, you also can no longer hold back the tears that cascade down your face. jimin is quick to rush to your side, making you sit down and lean against him.
“can you at least promise me that you’ll be there for my play?” you whimper, as you hold onto his arm and jimin nods immediately while pulling you in for a hug.
even his hug feels off to you.
“of course, i will, where else would i be?”
where were you today?
the question is at the tip of your tongue, ready to be released but you don’t say a word, you pat his arm in a signal to release you, and jimin watches with sorrowful eyes as you retreat into your bathroom. once the door is closed, you sink down on the floor with your hand on your mouth to muffle your sobs.
you don’t fully get why you’re crying. you’re tired from running all day and getting things done as quickly as you could to reach home for an anniversary party that jimin didn’t even bother coming to, you felt pathetic for putting in all that effort for nothing.
on the other side of the door, jimin hears your whimpers with downcast eyes and raises his hand to knock and hold you all night. but he pauses with his hand raised halfway, he takes a deep breath before stepping away. he doesn’t think he deserves to comfort you after what he did today.
jimin slowly walks to the huge vanity mirror in your room and pulls down his turtleneck to inspect the dark, blooming red patches splattered on his neck and he hates them.
jimin can’t believe what he’s become.
he can’t believe what he let hyejin do to him today either.
his hand hesitates to reach and graze those spots, wincing at the sensitivity. in some twisted way, he wishes for more of them to stain him but it’s not your mark that he wants, not anymore.
all jimin can think of is hyejin’s fingers brushing on his chest and asking him to stay for the night and how he almost agreed till he remembered which day it was.
he knows you’re hurt that he wasn’t there for the anniversary but your wails are just background noise to him at this point.
jimin can’t believe that he’s going to hurt you even more.
-
you stir as bright sunlight falls on your face, you curse to yourself before burying your head in the pillow with a groan. you still feel tired, and your entire body aches even if you slept quite well.
quite well is an exaggeration really, you kept waking up in cold sweat throughout the night because of dreams in which jimin left you, only after reaffirming that he was indeed next to you, did you fall back asleep.
the smell of fresh bread and coffee fills the air which makes you turn on your back, eyes popping from under the cover to take a look as your stomach grumbles involuntarily, reminding you that you didn’t eat anything last night. you see jimin standing there with a nervous smile and a tray covered in different delicacies in his hands.
your heart flutters as you take in the view, you missed waking up to him.
“good morning” he hums in a sweet tone and you sit up, allowing him to place the tray in front of you, it had all your favorites. you don’t greet him in return, your hurt from last night was still too fresh to forget.
“is this an apology?” your tone is as bitter as you feel and jimin hesitantly sits in front of you. “it’s also my attempt at celebrating our anniversary the way it deserves to be celebrated” he mumbles, albeit shamefully as he pulls out candles to stick on the lovely cupcake sitting in the center of the tray.
something about the sunshine falling on his pastel sweater and his hands carefully lighting the candles as his tongue sticks out a little in concentration, something about that sight is enough to forgive him in your heart. but he doesn’t need to know that.
when he looks up with his breathtaking smile and a gesture to blow out the candles, you almost completely forget what he put you through last night.
“i still haven’t forgiven you.” you lie with arms crossing your chest after blowing the candles and jimin nods in acceptance. “i don’t expect to be forgiven so easily babe but i’ll narrate a scene to you and we can make it happen if you want to forgive me.” he speaks softly, with tender loving laced in his voice as he pulls your hands from the defensive stance they’ve taken against your chest, easily breaking every barrier you’ve built to protect yourself.
“let’s say we go to lunch, it’s in the outskirts of the city, in that restaurant surrounded by vineyards that you like so much. you can wear your prettiest dress and i will try to match up on your beauty, i know i’ll fail but a guy’s gotta try, right?” he says with a teasing smirk, you chuckle bashfully as your entire body leaps in newly regained energy, your heart is already so hopeful.
“and then we can go to that bookstore you like or that ice cream parlor you like, really anywhere you want to go. we can come back home or we can stay out all night and go stargazing by the beach. today, we’ll properly celebrate us, okay?” you are all heart eyes as you nod with the biggest smile on your face and he breaks into a large grin himself at your agreement, putting away the tray and immediately pulling you into a bear hug. “i’ll think about forgiving you at the end of today.” you mumble into his neck jokingly and he breaks away with a playful glare.
“that’s just not fair, what do you mean you’ll just think about it?” he whines with a pout on his face and you giggle at his frustration. “oh, you find this so funny, don’t you?” he narrows his eyes at you for a minute before his hands leap to tickle you, you fall back on the bed with breathy laughter and squeals, jimin joins in the laughter as his hands tickle you everywhere he remembers you to be ticklish.
it all looks perfect. it looks like you and jimin again.
but perfection doesn’t hide what jimin did.
jimin’s ringtone blasts through the otherwise giggly and lovingly dizzy environment. you both look back at the phone, and jimin bundles you in his arms as he sits up to answer the phone. you smile childishly and poke his nose to annoy him as he tries to talk to whoever is on the other line, you don’t notice how stiff his entire expression suddenly becomes through his hesitant chuckles at you.
“wait, right now?” your fingers pause on his face as your smile immediately drops, jimin’s hold on you loosens as he continues to talk, and the rush you felt from before escapes your body as quickly as it came. you get off his lap and drop your head back on your pillow as you hear jimin sigh in agreement.
you should’ve known.
“who was it?” you mumble into the sheets and jimin gulps, “the choreographer” he shows you the call history, you don’t understand why but for jimin, it’s his way of trying to make you believe him.
he knew hyejin would call at some point and he couldn’t risk you knowing anything about her at all so as soon as things got not-so-innocent between them, he saved her contact as the choreographer.
the tension in the air is palpable when you don’t say a word, you don’t need to though, your disappointment is evident and jimin does not know what to say, he can’t say no to hyejin but he feels horrible enough for what he’s doing to you, he was hoping that he could salvage some emotion from today but nothing seems to go his way these days.
“babe…they’re saying it’s urgent.” she says we need each other to lap up the industry.
“just go, jimin” you groan out, you’re frustrated and tired and you just want to know why you can’t have him for one day. “i’m really sor-“ he starts but you’re quick to cut him off. “just go.” your voice is strained and defeated as your heart continues to drown in the disappointment of promises he didn’t fulfill.
he purses his lips and almost has the urge to call hyejin and tell her to fuck herself and scream at her for ruining what he already had.
but he won’t.
instead, he will leave you on your shared bed, all alone after destroying every chance of being with you the same way again. he can’t blame her for the choices he makes because jimin knows what he chose at that moment, it was not you.
it will never be you from now on.
-
for the next couple of weeks, you two barely see each other. frankly, you wanted to fix things as soon as possible, but your work got so much more hectic than you had anticipated. there were so many moving pieces to be decided by you and you didn’t have the time or energy to worry about your relationship but it was always in the back of your mind.
you figured you both would eventually work it out.
“today’s my play, it starts at 6 in the evening” it’s one of the few full sentences you tell jimin in so long. you’re eating breakfast together after a ridiculous time apart and you felt like you had to remind him about one of the biggest milestones in your life.
“i remember, of course, i will be there.” he says with a small smile and you smile back because somewhere in you, you so badly hope that whatever this phase you and jimin were going through, would end soon and you could go back to waking up to his beaming face every morning.
but that hope comes crashing down on you as stand behind the velvet curtain and fiddle with the cloth, trying to spot jimin in the dazzling full crowd.
“hey, did you perhaps see park jimin in there?” you stop and ask a crew member who simply shakes their head and runs off to get everything ready to start the play. even as the music starts, you can’t think of anything else, you barely enjoy the work that you have crafted over the months, you don’t feel a thing as everyone cheers and hugs at the end of it.
he missed your play; he actually missed the most important thing in your life right now.
“oh my god!” you hear someone loudly exclaim which snaps you out of your trance, turning around to see jimin run into the small back room with flowers in his hands. “it’s park jimin, bet he’s here for our director” a hushed whisper passes you by and everyone pats you with teasing smiles as they leave the room but you can’t bring yourself to smile back.
before jimin can even utter a word, you’re already making your way out the door. you are seething with anger, every exhale of yours louder than the previous one as you stomped your way out of the room with jimin hot on your tail.
“wait, i can explain!” he yells loudly as he grabs your arm and you pause because you see a few people from your crew in the same corridor. “you can explain when we are out of my workplace, do you get that?” your loyalty to professionalism slipped jimin’s mind and he hesitantly lets go of your arm, he watches as you politely greet and thank everyone before taking heavy steps out of the building.
“are you really going to not even look at me?” jimin glances at your side profile as you stop at a red light, the air in the car got heavier with each second you two didn’t acknowledge the other. but as you keep waiting, jimin keeps getting more anxious because if your relationship was going to end, he didn’t want it to happen this way.
“i’m saying i’m sorry, i seriously am very sorry for missing your play, it’s just practice got hectic and it completely slipped my mi-“ jimin frantically makes excuses and pauses at his grave error. he knows he’s said the worst thing he could when you turn to him with dead eyes.
“slipped your mind? my biggest career milestone so far, slipped your mind?” you bitterly chuckle and jimin gulps, sinking in his seat. “it’s been very busy” he meekly offers and he knows he deserves the scoff you let out.
“what could keep you so busy, jimin? you didn’t come to our anniversary, fine, it was whatever, i was hurt and i didn’t think much of it because i know how important practice is to you. but i can’t sit here and keep excusing every shitty thing you do and if it really is practice, don’t fucking push yourself so much. and do not expect me to let you go all the time!” he lets you scream your frustration out, it was clear you didn’t want to listen to him. he doesn’t say a word even when you reach home and silently sit on the couch, whatever frustration you felt turned into thin air as you realized what this meant.
“you missed my first ever direction” you whisper as jimin sits down next to you and he pauses, taking a deep breath because jimin really didn’t think he would let it get this far.
“i know” he admits, too ashamed to look at you so he looks at the carpeted floor and shuts his eyes when he hears your breath choking.
he shouldn’t have let it get this far, he shouldn’t have believed hyejin when she said that together, they could turn their lives and careers around, saying he had the name and she had the connections. and it would work, it is still supposed to work.
but how is jimin going to achieve whatever hyejin has promised him if you are not there in his life?
no, no.
heneedshyejin.
he just wants you, for his own selfish reasons.
hyejin made sure to remind him of how he would come running after her if they didn’t continue what they had.
“i can’t believe you didn’t come to my debut as a director, we’re supposed to do everything together jimin, what is going on?” your voice hitches here and there as tears fall down your face because you don’t, for the love of god, understand what’s happening with your relationship.
together; the word used to mean so much to him, it meant a future with you, it meant you to him but now, it’s just another word that has lost its meaning somewhere along the way.
i can’t believe it either, jimin bitterly thinks. he snaps himself out of his thoughts when he hears your sobs get louder.
“hey, hey, come here” he holds your shoulder and presses you against his body, letting you cry into his chest. you hate that you’re crying after such a successful day in your career. the play went perfectly, the crew and audience were singing praises of you but nothing in your personal life was adding up.
“you would never do anything to hurt me, right?” jimin’s heart stops as you softly ask him, looking up at him with teary eyes, you don’t know why you ask him but you need to be sure of that one thing, if not anything else. his hand that was rubbing your arms in an attempt to console you, stop in a jerk and his heart drops to his stomach at the way you’re looking at with so much vulnerability.
“why would i?” he nervously smiles, and even if it would have looked unconvincing to you usually, your fragile heart just accepted the false reassurance he gave you.
he’ll find a way to make it up to you, jimin thinks to himself. someday, he will wake up and think of you as he used to, and not hyejin. someday, he will start writing you love letters again instead of apologies. someday, jimin will find himself that loved you so much and everything will be okay again.
-
you stay home a lot, either worrying about your relationship or attending calls with future acts and partnerships. you felt blessed that at least your professional life was looking up.
but you missed jimin a lot, you offered to watch him practice and meet with his crew, and all those times, jimin immediately refused before backing it up with some lame excuse. you don’t push him though; you know that the play is weighing heavily on his mind with how silent he got around the home but you didn’t know that he was actually thinking of ways to let you down slowly.
he never ends up telling you.
before either of you know it, the day of jimin’s play arrives, he leaves home early and you’re left buzzing with excitement at home to finally see jimin as the black swan on stage.
you hummed as you got ready with a faint smile on your face, you were happy to see the play but you were actually happier that once it’s over, you could finally talk things out with jimin and build your relationship again together. you wanted him to know you forgave him, you consoled the angry part of you that there would be even more to look forward to in the future.
you carry this renewed hope all the way to the grand theatre where everyone looked and were expensive in every sense, the black swan wasn’t open for just everyone, it was a highly exclusive guest list and you couldn’t care less about all the glamours, you wanted to see the black swan himself and his white swan, who you were more than curious about.
you clutch the flowers in your hand tighter in anticipation as you take your seat and the lights start dimming away. and you let out an audible gasp when you see the white swan starting the stage, she’s a strong woman adorned with wings that look as pure as her but you could notice that shift in her eyes, the shift between passion and madness. you watch with wide eyes as she falls down, dragging her feet along the stage, begging the floor and her body to dance again before she’s pulled away.
and that’s when your breath is truly taken away. because jimin enters with onyx wings and smudged black eyes as she is being dragged away, and when jimin twirls on stage, the crowd holds their breath, not a single person wanting to forget how magically he moved on stage.
it’s the next scene that reels you in because the white and black swan are so close, you can’t even tell where the white swan begins and the black swan ends, it’s like the child-like purity and innocence dance right along with the absolute submission to your craft and the consequences that come with it.
you shift uncomfortably at the proximity the two share which was weird, you have never felt this way with any of his other dancers but something about the way they looked at each other, as they moved together, irked you.
but you don’t have time to think, the music becomes louder and louder, invading your senses fully and signaling finality to the play and the swans move quicker, sharper, and closer. your eyes burn with newfound jealousy as they finally leap into the sky, both their bodies remaining graceful even in the air with arms wrapped around each other, only to fall back down together, the music ceases immediately and the curtain falls on their heavy breathing but unmoving bodies.
the theatre is silent for a beat or two, everyone trying to encapsulate the truly terrific performance they just saw, and then the silence is replaced with the loudest applause you have ever heard in your life.
the kind of applause that hyejin promised jimin.
you stay in your seat, still a little dizzy from what you just experienced and you try to ignore the weird feeling in your stomach, trying to reassure yourself that dancing together required the right kind of chemistry and that’s it.
it is not connected to the many nights jimin has not come home, it is not connected to him suddenly insisting to do his own laundry, it is definitely not connected to him missing your anniversary and debut as a director.
it can’t be, jimin wouldn’t do that to you.
but your gut knows that something is terribly wrong and you’ve missed something huge from the past couple of months.
you slowly walk to where the reporters stand, hoping to see jimin and they all chatter loudly, preparing every question in their mind to ask the stars of the night, you nervously hold your bouquet close as you keep walking to the stage.
and your steps pause.
because jimin and hyejin, now free of costumes but with their theatrical makeup, step out from behind the curtains while holding hands with beaming smiles on their faces.
you tilt your head in confusion because jimin’s never held any of his dance partners’ hands when they walk out, your gut instinct pulls at you and just as you’re about to shrug it off, hyejin leans in for a kiss with jimin.
the camera flashes go off, all the reporters wildly shouting at them to pose and your blood runs cold, your body remains completely still as you watch them pull away with adoration in their eyes. you almost recoil from the sight as you feel the breath knocked out of you, you want to get away from this because it can’t be your jimin on the stage kissing someone else.
“are you two finally confirming the rumors?” a reporter yells on the top of his lungs.
what rumors?
hyejin rests her head on jimin’s chest with a happy nod, the questions come in rapid speed after that.
your heart submerges in pure betrayal because this was jimin, he was your day one, he was the reason you fought to stay alive in this industry for so long, he was supposed to be your future, you never imagined growing older without jimin by your side.
you look at jimin, trying to meet his eyes, trying to get him to explain what was happening and why he was holding her the way he was, why was he looking at her like he looked at you? but he doesn’t spare you a glance, he only has eyes for the woman latched onto his torso.
you feel sick.
you feel sick and angry as your vision fills with red.
you see red, all you see is dirty, dark, spilled and stained red clouding your mind and you hate that your gut was right, it’s been right from the very beginning. each time jimin didn’t come, it wasn’t because he was working hard, it was because he bought into every fantasy hyejin narrated to him but you don’t know that.
jimin finally meets your gaze, his heart racing a million miles as he senses the full force of betrayal and disappointment in your eyes, he also sees raging anger which has him looking away from you. even standing here with everything that hyejin promised, jimin doesn’t feel good, he’s like a shell, he doesn’t feel the same warmth in his heart that he does after every performance.
for a split moment, jimin doesn’t want what hyejin is giving him but he hesitates and hyejin always knows when jimin hesitates, so as soon as his grip loosens around her hand and she knows where he’s looking, she tightens her hold and gives him a tight smile.
“i told you, there’s no use fighting me, jimin. not anymore” she whispers sweetly into his ear with a grin, it would look like she was being an affectionate lover but jimin senses the warning in her tone.
so, he resists fighting anyway.
the thing is, jimin could fight, he could search desperately for a part of him that loved you but he chooses not to, he chooses to give you up.
she feels like you anyway and he’s already lost you; he can’t lose everything else too, especially not this loud applause and flashing cameras, jimin cannot risk giving his career up to god.
so when he glances back at you and the crumbling bouquet in your hand with pity on his face, you deem him a coward.
a coward for hiding behind hyejin, a coward for not ending things with you the way you both deserved, a coward for lying every single time you needed honesty from him, and a coward for looking at you with pity when he was more pitiable.
but you can’t help but feel like you were just as much a coward like him. a coward for not confronting him about his odd behavior earlier, a coward for not wanting to know why exactly he wasn’t coming home, a coward for forgiving him for the sake of keeping your relationship intact, and you feel ashamed of yourself.
once it becomes clear to you that jimin wasn’t yours’ anymore, you gather the energy to walk out of the theatre with your head held high because you are not the liar here, you didn’t stomp on someone’s heart so you will crumble only when you’re alone again.
and jimin stays right beside hyejin, while trying to ignore the sinking feeling his heart puts him through as he watches you leave through his periphery, he shudders as the door shuts behind you and he
Later that night when you finally put all the kids to sleep, you quickly prepared yourself for the call that your husband promised earlier that day, you did your makeup and put a provocative but comfy outfit, underneath some lingerie to spice things up and your trusted vibrator right beside you, you closed the door of your room and just in time the face of Jimin was glaring at you with a cheeky smile.
He let several buttons of his shirt loose, in his hand a cup of wine though you notice two emptied cans of beer.
In the background you recognized his current favorite band playing.
Drunk Jimin was fun, so you didn’t mind.
“Hi there, kitten” he said to you chuckling in way that you found cute but also sexy.
“Hi babe” you responded “You are having a drink, I see” he nodded in way that resembled an enthusiastic child.
“umhm” he mumbled “why you look so hot today? your tits look amazing in that dress” he bluntly confessed.
You blushed at his comment.
“And you unbuttoned your shirt just for me, right?” you asked him playfully, he bit his lip “I can even see you pierced nipple, if i had to guess, I’d say you are flirting, what a slut” you teased him chuckling.
“Watch your mouth or I will have you fixed properly when I come back” he warned raising an eyebrow “I want to see your body, take off the dress” he requested, you did as he said only leaving you with a very skimpy lingerie, he smiled pleased opening his legs on his chair.
“Good” he said with a raspy tone “kitten you are so fine, my pants are so tight right now because of you” he confessed.
“Show me”
Jimin stoop up from his chair, you could only see the lower torso and crotch area where a tent was forming in his pants, then he suddenly unzipped his pants and took out his dick from his underwear, the erected member went up to Jimin’s bellybutton, he took his dick with one hand and started to give it a few strokes, you could hear him moan, you immediately felt how your walls clenched and how the juices were now spilling in your lingerie, he seated in his chair again his lips parted and with darker eyes full of desire.
“I want your pussy around my cock so bad” he said giving his dick a few more strokes while he moaned again “Are you wet? Show me”
You opened your legs and with a hand put aside your panties and introduced a finger inside then you took it out and passed your fingers through you slit until you found your clit making you moan and started to give it a few circular strokes, then you showed to the camera the sticky mess that your fingers were.
“Shit that’s so hot” he said stroking his cock harder while he moaned.
“Unbutton your shirt” you requested while you played with your nipple and the other hand stimulating your clit.
He followed your instructions revealing his two pierced nipples and his rib tattoo, pants on his thigs, while you watched him touch himself with his moaning and the lewd sounds he was making, you dammed the distance that in this moment was between you two.
You took your bra off letting your swollen breast be free, Jimin choked a moan at the sight and his breathing was heavier, took off your panties and turned on your vibrator.
“Uh your are such a fucking…ugh slut aren’t you…ah kitten?”- he said with difficulty, his cock wet of precum, his digits caressing the tip while he kept his strokes, shamelessly looking at you.
Your walls clenched once more and you felt the knot in your lower belly beginning to unknot, while you were hot mess, moaning at the pleasure you were giving yourself.
You felt your breast starting to leak milk, at that moment you saw how your husband was getting desperate to keep it together, now he is moving his hips with his hand still in his length.
“Ahh yn, I can’t” he mumbled “I’m gonna cum, I can’t mmm” he was slurring all fucked up from pleasure, you could also feel it.
“Me too, me too” it didn’t pass long when spurts of white cum spilled on Jimin’s abdomen, while he said your name when he came, he closed his eyes riding the wave of pleasure, and you did too, it felt delightful.
“You better prepare yourself, because when I come back home I will not stop till next week” a devilish smile on his soft face.
