#laugh out loud
This is quite the horror suspense thriller.
Book Frodo: linguistics nerd, hoards books, thinks he is very smart, acts chill but is actually stressed out 100% of the time, will infodump at you about elvish poetry
Film Frodo: Some kind of hipster, probably has anxiety, Elijah Wood’s Beautiful Blue Eyes, has bruises he doesn’t remember getting bcos he’s a clumsy fuck, too good for this sinful (middle) earth
Book Sam: cries when overwhelmed, writes poetry (but is too embarrassed to show it to anyone), Soft ™, drinks beer directly out of the tap, made of feelings and determination, basically a humanoid golden retriever
Film Sam: winner of world’s biggest Dad Friend award, smacks orcs w a frying pan, loves bacon, has accidentally punched self in face at least once, (ง •̀_•́)ง
Book Merry: acts like a jaded elderly man even though he’s the hobbit equivalent of like 22, fantasises about being a Brave Knight so he can protect his friends, Brandybuck Pride!!, loves pipeweed to a near sexual degree
Film Merry: definitely a stoner, steals vegetables, says ‘fight me’ to people twice his size, Sarcasm is his primary weapon, can eat his own weight in ham
Book Pippin: baby bi, Smol, has 0 impulse control, calls everyone ‘fellow’, does not listen when people talk to him because he is thinking about sandwiches
Film Pippin: literally the dumbest hobbit alive