ronaldreagancutupwhiletalking:

trying to explain what iPods are to a knight

Now imagine this divine alabaster tablet, emblazoned with the image of the apple of eden, of which houses a small inconceivable bard who will recite to you any limerick or hymn you so wish to enjoy at any time or occasion

Wishing my medieval friends a very type it “my lady” instead of “m’lady” because it jumpscares me every dang time

Ikemen Sengoku Meets Medieval Fantasy

The following story is a bit of fanfiction, involving the characters of Cybird’s Ikemen Sengoku: Romances Across Time.

Catch up with Part 1 Here | Part 2 Here | Part 3 Here

Part 3 continues with the adventures of:

Erathelyn Aeratanas (my half-elf OC) ~ The Clever Dual-Dagger Rogue

Mitsunari Ishida “Nari” ~ The Cheerful Bard

Ieyasu Tokugawa “Yasu” ~ The Snarky Archer & Medicine Man

Mitsuhide Akechi “Hide” ~ The Mysterious Shapeshifter

Masamune Date “Masa” ~ The Secretive (and cocky) Knight

He only thought that was a great escape plan. But tumbling through a window is not as simple as one might think. 

“Ugh! Oof! Damn it!” He sputtered as his body hit the muddy ground and his cloak snagged on the windowsill. He managed to free himself and turned, wiping away the grime…only to be met with the tip of cold steel. 

“Well, well, well…look what we’ve found boys. Our deserter making a break for it. You wouldn’t be thinking of running from your bill would you now?" 

"Shit.” A curse slipped out as he recognized the guy from their little altercation in the alley not more than a few minutes earlier. He raised his hands in surrender and smirked, “Now now…no hard feelings huh? I mean, can you really blame a guy for being a little defensive when another man sneaks up on him while he’s taking a leak?”

Chuckles erupt from the four men behind the scowling one. He shot them glares and each buttoned up. 

“You’re coming with us, deserter. There’s quite a bounty on your head. One I think we’d all like a piece of.”

//Really?…

“What’s it up to? 250 coins? 300?”

“225.” one of the other men chimed in, immediately receiving another silencing stare. 

“That’s all? Hmm…that’s a shame.”

“Enough. Now are you going to come willingly or do we need to do this the hard way?” A smirk formed on the man’s face.

Masa internally rolled his eye and dropped his hands, “I’m sorry…”

“What?”

“I said, I’m sorry.” Masa’s smirk vanished and so did the man’s. 

“For what?" 

"For this.” It didn’t take much skill to incapacitate the five of them, but to do it with such ferocity and swiftness definitely was something extraordinary.

His face was known far and wide for being a deserter of the Royal Guard—a despicable, cowardly man who ran from his duties. None knew the truth. None knew how truly capable and masterful he really was. And he liked it that way. 

Mounting his horse, he thought for a moment about catching up to those he’d fled from. But the sounds of alarm bells and shouts deterred any notion of actually doing so. He’d meet them…but not yet. First, he needed to get the hell out of Dern and round back for them. They’d been seen with him and word would spread. He wouldn’t leave them to the uncouth interrogation tactics of the village guards.

***

He’d lost them. At least for the time being. And in doing so, took to the shadows of the forest. It wasn’t long before he caught up to the four he’d been hired to work with. He watched as the men rode steadily by an ever-slowing half-elf that refused to take the offered hands of her travel companions, even though several were offered multiple times. 

He liked her. She had spunk. Her fiery spirit belied her heritage and that set her apart in his eyes. Too many elves and humans born of high status chose to behave in such ways that made his blood boil. She may not have been nobility, but her elvish bloodline was enough to turn him off initially.

But her attitude towards Hide and her constant eye rolling and amused smirks directed at the elf made him see her differently.

As much as he wanted to see how far her agile feet would carry her, he could see the days of walking finally catching up to her—even from a distance. He spurred his horse forward and out of the shadows of the forest lining their southward trek.

He pulled the reins, stopping the horse just in front of her, and reached out a hand, “Climb on up. I promise to keep my hands to myself.” The charming smirk of his reappeared, only illuminated by the glow of the moon hanging high above.

Waiting for an acceptance—or refusal—was out of the question. His large hand curled around hers before anything could be said and he hoisted her effortlessly into the saddle before him. Both arms circled around her, one holding her close to his chest, and the other grabbing tight to the reins. His voice held a playful lilt to it as he whispered in her ear, “You’d better hold on. We have to move with haste.”

With a quick kick of his heels, his horse took off. He called over his shoulder with a chuckle, “Keep up gentlemen, unless you wish to spend your night in the cells of Dern.”

All three men looked at one another. Nari was the one to look back and see the glint of armor heading towards them.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Ikemen Sengoku Meets Medieval Fantasy

The following story is a bit of fanfiction, involving the characters of Cybird’s Ikemen Sengoku: Romances Across Time.

Catch up with Part 1 Here | Part 2 Here

Part 3 continues with the adventures of:

Erathelyn Aeratanas (my half-elf OC) ~ The Clever Dual-Dagger Rogue

Mitsunari Ishida “Nari” ~ The Cheerful Bard

Ieyasu Tokugawa “Yasu” ~ The Snarky Archer & Medicine Man

Mitsuhide Akechi “Hide” ~ The Mysterious Shapeshifter

Masamune Date “Masa” ~ The Secretive (and cocky) Knight

I could not believe what I heard or just saw. The man, the human who stood over me with a cocky smirk and a sword of the Royal Guard, was leaping out a nearby window in an attempt to run from a bar tab.

I glanced at Nari. He stared at the window with wide eyes and barely registered my confounded expression.

“Well, that’s one way to make an exit.” A chuckle reverberated from Hide’s throat and he slowly stood from his chair. He sighed, fastening his cloak around himself and shot me a grin.

“Despicable. How barbaric can you humans get?”

I whirled on Yasu. He was always such…an elf. One of the many reasons we didn’t remain engaged. One of the least important, but still a reason nonetheless.

//Okay…so do we follow?…

As I turned to ask Nari the very question I had thought, I realized he’d moved in the short amount of time I’d spent glaring at Yasu. He was now at the bar paying for Masa’s tab.

//That’s unexpected. I wonder how well he knows this Masa character?…

“They’ve met once, but Nari never was one for leaving people in the lurch.”

I jumped, “What the hell? What do you read minds?”

All the response I got from the complete enigma that was Hide, was another chuckle and a pat on my head. Oh how I wanted to swat that bony hand away. Instead, I glared once more at a stone-faced Yasu and then followed the other two men out the door.

°°°°°

“He’s undoubtedly long gone by now. Should have known better than to trust a man like him.” Yasu spoke gruffly as he secured his belongings to his glistening white horse.

“A man like him?” I shifted on my feet. The floor of the stable house creaked beneath my weight. My pack shifted on my shoulder and I inhaled deeply when I readjusted it. Sleep had begun to catch up to me and I was beginning to feel it deep within my bones. It’d been a long journey and I feared I’d have an even longer one ahead of us, what with the barkeep urging us to find shelter elsewhere.

Yasu stopped tying his saddle and looked at me blankly, “A disloyal man. A man who vowed his allegiance only to—”

“And just what brought you out of the forest and away from your clan? Are elves not supposed to remain within their positions?”

I jumped. Hide’s voice echoed through the room as he sauntered into the lantern light with a menacing black horse of his own. The beast towered over the other horses and piercing yellow eyes matched those of his owner’s.

//I have got to sleep. This is ridiculous. My senses are dulled.

Yasu huffed and turned his green glare back to his horse.

//I guess not gonna answer that one, huh?

I found myself smirking at the scene. Yasu flustered was a wondrous sight.

“Do you have a horse, Era? I don’t see another in the stables.” Hide turned his question to me with that same sly grin.

I shook my head, “No. I traveled on foot.”

A silver brow arched and his hand snaked up to stroke the silky mane of his stallion, “Ah, nimble as you are beautiful? Your lithe form belies your stamina, Era. How interesting.”

I rolled my eyes, turning away from the creepy man and taking a step closer to Yasu. Not that he was any better.

//Where is Nari?

“Our friendly bard is just outside. It would appear that he forgot to stable his horse and had found the thing wandering outside. Shall we?”

I arched my own brow at him.

//You have got to stop that. It’s creepy.

Hide chuckled as he led his horse out the doors.

°°°°°

“Era! Unfortunately I was unable to secure a horse for you, and there seems to be no other lodging in Dern. We will have to travel to the next village.” Nari beamed down at me from atop his horse.

I sighed. No horse for me means—

“No matter. The woman may ride with me.” Hide reached a hand from atop his own black beast.

“I’ll walk.” I shifted my pack, made sure my cloak was secure, and started my trek south.

I could hear murmured concerns about the missing ex-soldier coming from a worried Nari, scoffing hisses coming from a perpetually perturbed Yasu, and a slight humming from the mind reader.

My feet ached, my body was screaming for me to stop, and I could feel the overwhelming sense of exhaustion creeping up my spine and about ready to knock me on my ass. The black beast was beginning to look very inviting right about now.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Part 4 is Now Up!

Medieval Times was willdd

roach-works:

tiktoks-for-tired-tots:

honestly i think real knights did this shit back then too