by Tyrel Pinnegar

CHAPTER ONE: DRAFTING

Journal Entry #1

My name is Tammy Maheswaran, and I’m an independent roboticist. I’m keeping this journal to document the progress of a personal project.

My goal is to create a developmental robotics platform that will serve as a tool in the study of machine learning and emergent behavior.

Let’s get started, I guess?

Journal Entry #2

It just occurred to me that whoever ends up reading this journal might not have a background in robotics, and therefore would have no idea what I’m talking about.

Let me clarify: My goal is to create a learning machine. A machine that, through trial and error, creates its own subjective understanding of its surroundings.

Aside from a few simple rules, she’ll begin as a blank slate. She’ll know nothing. All sensory information will seem like a senseless jumble.

Her only asset will be her capability to learn.

There’s no telling where the project will go from there. My hope is that with time and guidance she’ll become something truly unique.

Journal Entry #3

I’ve spent the last few days doodling robots. I’m still trying to find the right look.

I want her to stand out from the crowd. Something really unique. People seem to have this preconceived notion of what a robot should be. I’d much rather think about what a robot couldbe.

So many modern robots have a bleak, sterile look to them. Machined aluminum. Smooth plastic. Even when they manage to look appealing, they have an air of inaccessibility about them. They don’t invite your touch.

When you stop to think, a robot could be made of just about anything. Unglazed porcelain. Driftwood. Bamboo. There are so many ways one could make a robot seem warmer, more textural, more inviting.

Perhaps what I’m looking for is something more along the lines of a plush toy. Soft. Safe.

I’ll take some time to think on it.

Journal Entry #4

Memory foam. I’m going to use memory foam.

I’ll have to find a solution for various heat retention problems, but it’ll be worth the trouble. Lightweight. Soft. It’s perfect.

She’ll likely be incredibly clumsy for a while after booting up for the first time. There’s no telling how long that stage will last. A body constructed from memory foam will help prevent her from damaging herself or her surroundings.

She needs to be allowed to make mistakes. It’s a vital part of learning. The least I can do is make it safe for her to do so.

Still, memory foam is a delicate material. She’ll need some sort of outer layer to protect against abrasions.

I’ll compile a list of possible materials in the morning.

Journal Entry #5

I’ve assembled a small collection of fabric swatches in my attempt to find a suitable skin for the project. Some interesting ideas, but none of them feel quite right.

Denim seems like a good candidate in the practical sense. Strong. Durable. Sturdy. Aesthetically however, I don’t think it’s a good fit. I want her to have an air of elegance about her. Sleek. Smooth. Denim has none of these qualities.

Silk would be elegant of course, but it seems antiquated. I want her to feel modern. More like a piece of abstract sculpture, and less like an eighteenth-century Japanese automaton.

I flirted briefly with the idea of using a baby blue polar fleece, like a pair of footed pajamas. It’s a cute thought, but I can’t help but feel it would look a little demeaning.

I don’t know. I’ll keep looking.

Journal Entry #6

Neoprene. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it earlier. Waterproof. Elastic. Easy to clean. It’s pretty much skin already.

Neoprene can be treated almost as if it were a fabric. It can be cut. It can be glued. It can be sewn. It shouldn’t be too much trouble to fashion a snug, form-fitting outer layer to fit nearly any body shape I happen to come up with.

I have to consider thickness carefully. Too thin and the neoprene could tear. Too thick and it may begin to restrict movement. I think four millimeters is probably a good compromise.

Also, the nylon knit fabric used to laminate neoprene is available in nearly any color imaginable. I’m tempted to try something in charcoal and turquoise, personally.

Journal Entry #7

I’ve got a vague image of what I want the final product to look like forming in my mind. It still feels like something is missing, though. All that neoprene ends up looking sort of featureless. It lacks character.

There needs to be some sort of visual interest to break up the monotony. Something to keep her from looking like a walking wetsuit. I can’t quite put my finger on what, though.

Journal Entry #8

Stitches. Big, chunky stitches, like a rag doll sewn together with shoelaces. Non-functional, running along the seams, obscuring the true needlework.

I’m going to use turquoise 550lb nylon paracord, laced through four-millimeter powder-coated aluminum eyelets. Obviously the tensile strength of paracord isn’t strictly necessary for what is basically a purely aesthetic purpose, but its thickness gives it an appealing chunkiness.

Journal Entry #9

It’s slowly becoming apparent that I probably shouldn’t stitch this whole ensemble completely shut. I’m still a little fuzzy about what kind of hardware will be housed inside her plush exterior, but whatever it ends up being, it should be kept accessible.

I’m thinking I should install a hidden maintenance zipper. One that runs all the way around the central seam, allowing her neoprene skin to be split into two separate halves and removed from her endoskeleton. It shouldn’t be too difficult to make it inconspicuous. Use a narrow, fine-toothed zipper. Match the color to the surrounding fabric. Tuck in the pull tab. Nearly invisible.

Maintenance wouldn’t be a routine thing, as unzipping would require unlacing several meters of paracord, but it’ll be reassuring to have a non-destructive access method should mechanical problems eventually crop up.

On the plus side, all that paracord will help prevent any potential self-unzipping.

Journal Entry #10

Today it dawned on me that I had yet to decide how tall the final product should be. After a lot of thought, I settled on sixty-two inches. She needs to be tall enough to comfortably interact with people, but small enough to be restrained if she starts acting unpredictably. I measure in at a whopping sixty-six inches, so that seemed like a fair enough compromise.

I realize I should probably be planning this sort of thing in metric. I’m so used to hearing people’s height in feet and inches that it was just easier to visualize this way. I’ll convert her measurements to centimeters before I begin work on the actual blueprints.

Journal Entry #11

If I were to start fabrication on the project as it stands now, the final product would end up being little more than a plush toy. She still needs a skeleton.

I know I badmouthed aluminum the other day, but it really is a versatile material. Lightweight. Strong. Fairly inexpensive. The downside is it can be tricky to weld. I don’t expect I’ll be doing much welding on this project, but it’s something to keep in mind.

Stainless steel might be an option, but it’s heavy. With a machine like this, unpredictable behavior is to be expected. It’s probably best to shave off as many kilograms as possible, for safety reasons.

Titanium would be ideal, but it comes at a price. I have some money stashed away for the project, but my budget isn’t unlimited. A titanium armature could potentially duodecuple the cost of materials.

I still need to explore carbon fiber as a possibility. It’s far lighter than any of the previous options, but I’m not sure what it would cost.

I’ll report back tomorrow.

Journal Entry #12

It just dawned on me that any skeletal support will be completely hidden in the final product, and therefore it doesn’t matter what it looks like. Machined PVC. Durable. Flexible. Cheap. Problem solved.

Journal Entry #13

I’ve been thinking carefully about potential methods of animation.

The obvious solution would be the classic servomotor. Accessible. Compact. Reliable. Not a particularly groundbreaking method, I suppose, but it works.

I do have a serious concern regarding servos though. Servos are ideal for tasks that require accurate, repetitive movements. Assembly line robots, for example. They can be precisely controlled by the programmer.

In this particular case, the programmer is not going to be the one in control.

Servos are capable of potentially violent, jerky motions. My fear is that she might accidentally damage herself or those around her in her early attempts at movement. It would be like putting a toddler at the wheel of a car. I need something safer.

Pneumatic muscles are interesting devices. Gentle. Supple. Compliant. They’re a lot like human muscles, if human muscles ran on compressed air. Pneumatic muscles move with a certain fluidity. They have a little bit of give. I’m quite confident they’ll be the safer choice for the project.

Journal Entry #14

Pneumatic muscles necessitate the use of an air compressor. This will be tricky. For the purposes of this project, the compressor needs to be compact and whisper-quiet. Most off the shelf compressors tend to be bulky and loud. It’s going to have to be a custom job.

There are several types of compression mechanism to choose from, however. Reciprocating compressors work a lot like the engine of a car, but in reverse. Problem is, all those pistons create just about as much racket as a car engine. Far too noisy for my purposes.

Scroll compressors are a clever concept. A motorized spiral oscillating against a stationary spiral, working together to force air toward their centers. But that sort of high-speed oscillation is bound to create a lot of vibration. Suitable for a stationary air compression unit perhaps, not so much for a clumsy, unbalanced robot.

A rotary screw compressor is probably my best bet. No oscillation means less vibration. No pistons means quieter operation. The whirring of the motor will be audible, but that’s not nearly as hard on the ears as the incessant buzzing of a reciprocating compressor. Besides, all that memory foam is bound to have a pretty serious sound dampening effect.

In a way, the compressor will act as the heart of the machine, so it only makes sense to place it in her chest. Something about that just feels right.

As far as compressed air storage is concerned, the best place for the canister is almost certainly the pelvic bowl, alongside her solenoid valve bank. Her hips will be the widest section of her torso by a fair margin, and more space for pressure storage means greater endurance.

I will admit that this is an unconventionally tight space to install a fully-functioning air compression system. I suspect she may need to stop and rest occasionally. Catch her breath, as it were.

Journal Entry #15

Batteries are one area where I’m willing to compromise my goal of keeping the project lightweight. One of my biggest pet peeves is seeing a robot permanently tethered to an external power source because nobody bothered to take the weight of the batteries into account.

Lithium-ion batteries seem to be the standard in modern electronics. They have a high storage capacity. They’re reusable. The downside is that they take a long time to charge. Hours. More downtime means less learning. Less learning means slower cognitive development. That’s unacceptable for a machine that has to start from scratch.

Supercapacitors might be the better choice. They’re not true batteries, as they don’t store energy chemically, but they can be used to fulfill a similar purpose. They do have downsides. They tend to have a lower storage capacity. They’re heavier. Bulkier. But they can charge in a matter of minutes. Seconds even. With a high capacity-array of supercapacitors installed, any downtime will be negligible.

Journal Entry #16

I’d like to have an easy way to read her charge level. Something that can be read at a glance. It would make day to day interaction a lot more straightforward.

It should probably use a universal symbol. Most charge indicator symbols are battery-shaped. Superconductors aren’t true batteries, I know. But it would be immediately understood by anyone who has even a passing familiarity with electronics. Kind of like how software interfaces use a floppy disk to represent the act of saving a file, despite the fact that floppies have been obsolete for nearly two decades now.

That still leaves the problem of how to display said symbol. Her neoprene skin doesn’t leave a lot of real estate for electronic displays. I suppose I could cut a small hole in the neoprene to allow a display to peek through.

Actually, now that I’ve given it some thought, most modern displays have some degree of flexibility. I could probably glue one directly to the surface of the neoprene. The left side of her chest seems like an appropriate location. Like a patch or badge.

The display itself should probably be electrophoretic, like an e-reader. They only consume energy when refreshing the display. In an application like this, that means energy consumption would be almost nonexistent.

Also, if I were to coat the display with a matte-finish transparent turquoise laminate, white sections of the image would show up turquoise, keeping it consistent with her turquoise and charcoal color scheme. Finally, segmented electrophoretic displays can be trimmed to nearly any shape imaginable, as long as the circuitry itself isn’t severed. Aesthetically, it’s just a good choice.

Journal Entry #17

I thought the best charging option would be a retractable power cord on a spool, like you might find on a vacuum cleaner. The further along I get, however, the more I realize that space is at a premium. There’s simply not any room for a heavy spool of copper wire.

The obvious solution would be a fully detachable power cord. Plug one end into the robot and the other into the wall. However, it would be ideal if she could remain operational while charging, and I’m a little nervous about the idea of leaving her unattended near a live wall socket.

Now I’m thinking about inductive charging. No wires. No risk of electrocution. Just a pair of copper coils in the soles of her feet, and a matching pair inside a charging pad on the floor. Charging would be as simple as standing on the pad and waiting.

It would be slower than wired charging, certainly. Not particularly efficient either. But the peace of mind makes it worth it. It’s simple and safe enough that I’m confident she could learn to do it on her own, as needed.

The act of balance itself requires a modicum of energy, however. That would slow charging to some degree. I could easily offset that by providing underarm support. Like a doll in a bell jar.

Journal Entry #18

It’s time to start thinking about computer hardware. I’ve engineered myself into a bit of a corner by using all that foam. That much insulation wrapped around a powerful processing rig is pretty much guaranteed to catch fire eventually.

I’ve been trying to figure out a workaround, and I think I’ve settled on something pretty clever. If I were to fashion the neoprene above her shoulders into a sort of hood, I could stitch a strip of curved aluminum right into the fabric itself and have it attach to the upper edge of her faceplate.

A setup like that would create a spacious and well-ventilated area behind her faceplate where I could stick computer components without having to worry about creating a horrifying fire hazard.

Also, it would result in a pretty nifty “invisible neck” illusion, which is the main reason I’m doing it.

Journal Entry #19

If the robot’s computer components are going to be situated in her head, they’re going to have to be lightweight. Any unnecessary top-heaviness is going to make learning to walk that much more difficult.

I’ve been toying with the idea of using smartphone components in order to minimize weight. The obvious downside to this is that mobile processors are considerably less powerful than their desktop counterparts.

However, If I can assemble a cluster of several top-of-the-line octa-core mobile microprocessors, I’d be getting a pretty incredible speed to weight ratio.

In fact, using smartphone components and a little bit of puzzle-work, I could probably fit the entire motherboard into the faceplate itself, leaving the rest of the hood empty and well ventilated.

Journal Entry #20

Most estimates place the storage capacity of the human brain somewhere between ten and one hundred terabytes. I could easily get my hands on a ten terabyte hard disk drive, but the idea makes me nervous.

With all those high-speed moving parts, HDDs are prone to catastrophic failure. I think almost everyone has had a hard drive fail at some point. The bumps and bruises one would have to endure inside a machine that’s teaching itself to walk would make failure all the more likely.

A solid state drive is the only real option. No moving parts means a greatly reduced chance of failure. Not a zero percent chance of course, but pretty close.

Unfortunately, solid state drives are a far younger technology than hard disk drives, meaning a lower storage capacity at a higher price. There are currently a few four terabyte SSDs available on the consumer market. Installing a pair of them would make for an eight terabyte total storage capacity, which is certainly nothing to sniff at.

Also, it’s not like she’ll need to permanently store every kilobyte of data she processes. I’ll teach her how to forget.

Journal Entry #21

If I were to start fabrication on the project as it stands now, the end result would be nothing more than an animatronic puppet. A machine does not qualify as a robot until it has the ability to perceive its environment.

Vision seems as good a place to start as any.

Whatever type of camera I choose, she’ll need at least two of them. Depth perception will be a necessity for learning how to interact with her surroundings. Obstacle avoidance, object manipulation, all of these tasks require a sense of depth in order to be performed with accuracy.

What’s left to choose is what she’ll see through those cameras. Near-infrared light would be a unique and beautiful way to view the world. Pale blue skies and snow white leaves.

Ultraviolet would be gorgeous as well. She would see hidden secrets that no one else could. Flowers with patterns meant just for bees. Invisible freckles on people’s faces.

But those types of imaging rely on bright natural sunlight. She’d be rendered effectively blind indoors. Seeing as that’s where she’ll be spending most of her time, they’re not really viable options.

Thermal imaging would allow for clear vision regardless of light conditions, but she’d miss out on so much that the world has to offer. Shadows. Colors. Translucency. None of these things are reproduced in a thermal image.

If I’m being honest with myself, full color perception will probably be more important to her development than I’m giving it credit for. It’s an easy visual shorthand for the boundaries of any given object. For a machine that will have to teach itself to see, that’s important.

Obviously the only way to go about that is with an ordinary, run-of-the-mill visible spectrum camera. It makes my job easier, at least. There are plenty of compact stereoscopic camera modules on the market.

Journal Entry #22

Hearing should be fairly straightforward. A simple binaural microphone array will allow for satisfactory directional hearing.

They don’t have to be conspicuous. I should be able to fit a pair of small directional microphones directly inside her faceplate without much trouble. In fact, I can probably rig up the array using a couple of hearing aids.

Internal noise interference can sometimes be a concern with machines like this, but seeing as the faceplate will have no moving parts and will be situated away from the rest of the body, I don’t foresee any problems cropping up.

Journal Entry #23

Touch will be a bit more complicated. It will likely end up requiring hundreds of sensors. Luckily, simple and flexible pressure sensors can be made for next to nothing.

It’s as simple as sandwiching a piece of pressure-sensitive conductive foil between two layers of conductive fabric. When pressure is applied, the electrical resistance of the foil is reduced, allowing for a simple numerical readout of the force being applied. Then I just sew each sensor into a pocket of ordinary non-conductive fabric to keep the whole unit from falling apart. The only tools it requires are basic sewing supplies.

After that, I can glue each sensor to the inside of her neoprene skin, stencil the necessary circuitry directly onto the rubber using a conductive metallic paint, then laminate the entire sheet with a layer of nylon knit fabric to prevent friction wear.

I’ll have to plan the sensor pattern carefully though. For instance, her shoulders might only require a few sensors each. The palms of her hands however, could require a dozen or more. The sensor resolution will be dependent on the dexterity and fragility of the corresponding body part.

Whatever the specifics, the end result will be a machine that can sense the slightest touch on nearly every square inch of her body. Not many robots can make that claim.

Journal Entry #24

External temperature sensors are not a huge priority in a machine of this type. However, for self-preservation purposes, she should be able to monitor internal temperatures.

For starters, she’ll need temperature sensors in her faceplate to prevent her CPU from overheating. Luckily, off-the-shelf processors have temperature monitoring capabilities built in, which saves me from having to worry about it too much.

More urgently, she’ll need a sensor monitoring the temperature of her air compressor. I failed to mention this before, but air compressors get hot. Hot enough to potentially catch fire. She’ll need to monitor compressor temperature in order to avoid overexerting herself. If the temperature gets too high, the compressor slows. This will inevitably lead to occasional shortness of breath, but it’s better than inevitably leading to a toxic foam-rubber bonfire.

Journal Entry #25

If she’s going to navigate her environment efficiently, she’s going to need to know which way is up. That’s where an accelerometer and gyroscope come in handy. The adjustments needed to keep a bipedal body upright are subtle and constant. These two sensors working in tandem will provide an X, Y, and Z axis that will be vital for learning to balance.

Modern smartphones have both of these sensors integrated into a single minuscule hybrid chip. It’s actually pretty incredible the level of miniaturization they’ve achieved. Finding room in the faceplate won’t be an issue. Besides, she’ll only need one. I’m pretty sure the fact that people have two sets of semicircular canals is a byproduct of our symmetry, rather than a matter of necessity.

Journal Entry #26

The accelerometer and gyroscope will only be enough to tell her where in space her head is located. She’ll need to deduce the rest from there.

A sense of proprioception can be achieved via a digital encoder in each joint. Two or three in multi-axis joints like shoulders, wrists, and hips. These sensors will make her aware of the rotational angle of each joint at all times, allowing her to calculate the position of her torso and extremities in relation to her head. In addition, they’ll allow a programmed rotation limit that will prevent her from overextending her joints.

Proprioception is a sense that people tend to take for granted, to the point where most people aren’t even aware they have it. However, it’s so vital to basic motor control that disorders of the proprioceptive system are serious enough to be considered disabilities. When building sensory systems from the ground up, you have to keep things like this in mind.

Journal Entry #27

I want to avoid giving her overtly human facial features. It’s far too easy to fall into the uncanny valley, even when using a somewhat stylized design. Just a simple vacuformed white plastic mask is enough to give some people the creeps.

I think I’d like to go more abstract than that. Smooth. White. Featureless. Almost shield-like. I’d still like her to be able to express herself, but perhaps via simple animated iconography rather than mechanical means.

Don’t ask me how one would go about displaying animated iconography on a convex faceplate. I haven’t thought that far ahead yet.

Journal Entry #28

I’ve got it. A convex electrophoretic display. Just like the one she’ll use for her charge indicator, but fitted perfectly to the contours of her faceplate. Her entire face would be a display surface.

Changing expressions would be a simple matter of refreshing the display. The fact that electrophoretic displays require no backlight means reduced eyestrain during long teaching sessions. The low power consumption means longer running times. On top of all that, it would look absolutely gorgeous.

There is one significant stumbling block, however. I’ve never actually seen a convex electrophoretic display before. Curved displays are everywhere nowadays, but convex? I’m not entirely sure it’s possible.

I guess if I’m going to be fabricating a robot from scratch, I might as well start with the uncertainties.

Journal Entry #29

Hypothetically, let’s assume a convex electrophoretic display is possible. What kind of face should be displayed on it? I’ve been toying with the idea of eyespots, like on the wings of a moth. Non-functional visually speaking, but enough to give the impression that someone is home.

Her eyespots wouldn’t be quite as striking as a moth’s. The intent isn’t to frighten, but engage. I like the idea of two simple rings. Light gray on stark white, one larger, one smaller, situated one above the other on the right side of her face. Perhaps that’s straying a little too far from what’s recognizable as human, but I feel it has a sort of haunting beauty.

Besides, I’ve done some rough drawings, and even with a vertical eyespot arrangement, her expressions would be immediately recognizable. Imagine each ring is made up of two circles. A gray outer circle, with a white inner circle layered on top. Layer that on top of a white background and it appears as a ring. Now, split each circle into fifteen degree radial segments. By removing segments, readable facial expressions can be displayed.

Remove the bottom half of the inner circle, and her expression becomes one of excitement. Remove the top half, and suddenly she’s displaying half-lidded eyes of boredom. Rotate those fifteen degrees either clockwise or counterclockwise, and she begins to express anger or sadness, respectively. Removing the top half of the outer circle gives the impression of being asleep, while removing the bottom half results in a bright and cheery smile. And that’s only what I’ve managed to coax out of the pattern so far. I feel as if I’ve only scratched the surface.

Of course, this is all assuming I can create a working convex display. It’s entirely possible that I’ll need to settle for a static, neutral expression. Not ideal, but what are you going to do?

Journal Entry #30

If her facial features are going to be represented by false eyespots, her true eyes will need to be hidden from view. Conspicuous camera lenses would immediately draw the eye, ruining the illusion.

I think I’d like to try obscuring the two cameras behind pinhole apertures. Miniature cameras like the ones used in mobile devices tend to have pinhole apertures anyway, so the sensor would still be receiving a complete image. The end result would appear as just a couple of inconspicuous black dots, positioned an inch or two apart in the center of her forehead. Barely even noticeable.

This would however, result in one minor behavioral oddity. Since the hidden cameras would have only a narrow viewing window, they would need to remain fixed in place. Looking around would entail swiveling her entire head, like an owl. It’s possible that some might find behavior like that off-putting.

I think it would be kind of cute, honestly.

Journal Entry #31

Still working on that convex display. I’ve got some ideas for how to make it work, but it involves some specialized and difficult to obtain materials. It’ll take a while to get everything gathered together.

Please stand by.

Journal Entry #32

I did it. It took some serious trial and error but I did it. I figured out a way to suspend electrophoretic microcapsules in a UV curing liquid resin, and airbrush it onto the inside of a frosted polycarbonate shell that had been given a graphene coating to turn it into a transparent electrode. Then I gave the whole thing a thorough once over with an ultraviolet lamp, and stenciled on the inner electrodes using a conductive metallic paint. The result: a spray-on electrophoretic display.

I’m going to refrain from revealing the precise details of how this was done. This is a potentially disruptive technology, and my patent application is currently pending.

The full complexity of a matrix display was slightly beyond my manufacturing capabilities. I had to settle for a segmented display, meaning a simplified electrode pattern that can only display a small number of predesignated facial expressions. That was the initial plan anyway though, so I’m not particularly broken up about it.

I should mention that what I’ve created is just a rough prototype, so it’s not suitable for use in the final product. It’s made from a polycarbonate cereal bowl, embarrassingly enough.

Journal Entry #33

Aaand I almost forgot to include an off switch. The goal was always to keep her operational as much as possible, but that doesn’t mean she won’t need to be shut down occasionally for maintenance.

The switch should probably be a simple button. Her plans are so clean and sleek-looking at this point, it would be a shame to muddy up the design with a conspicuous button. I could hide it beneath her neoprene skin, but that would leave her prone to accidental shutdowns.

Actually, now that I think about it, the backside of her faceplate is still completely vacant. Installing the switch back there would keep it hidden from view, and it’s unlikely to be pressed unintentionally. You’d have to reach under her chin and up inside her head to access it.

Yeah. That works.

Journal Entry #34

The blueprints are finally complete. I’m ready to begin fabrication. Adjustments in design will need to be made on the fly, of course. It’s pretty unlikely that I’ve managed to foresee every problem that will crop up during the manufacturing process. That’s just the way things work.

Still, I feel like I’ve hit a significant milestone. It feels good.

Journal Entry #35

Mariimo. Her name is Mariimo.

I’ve had that name rattling around in the back of my mind for a long time now. I was afraid to fully commit to the name at first, but now that I can fully imagine what she’ll look like, how she’ll feel, the way she’ll move… it suits her perfectly.

The name is derived from Aegagropila linnaei, a filamentous green algae that forms colonies of tumbling velvety spheres on the bottoms of cold water lakes. The Japanese call them marimo, a term that translates roughly to “ball seaweed.” I keep a small colony of my own in an aquarium in my office.

I realize it’s a bit of a cliche to give a robot a Japanese name, but I can’t help but fall in love with it. To me, marimo represent the beauty hidden in things that most would overlook. It’s my hope that when Mariimo is activated for the first time, her curiosity and unique perspective will allow her to find beauty in things that even I had never considered.

I can’t wait to finally meet her.

CHAPTER TWO: FABRICATION

Journal Entry #36

First things first. Before I start fabricating components physically, I need to build a complete digital version of Mariimo in the computer. I’ll need to build her twice, in a way.

The reasons for this are twofold. First, it’ll help me work out any kinks in her design while they’re still easy to correct. Adjustments are a fairly straightforward process when the parts don’t actually exist in physical space yet.

Second, a digital model is the first step in machining and milling physical components, which will be a significant part of my manufacturing process. In fact, once you have a finalized 3D model to feed into the CNC milling machine, it’s pretty smooth sailing from that point on. The machine takes care of most of the dirty work.

I’ll be using plenty of prefabricated components as well, which I’ll have to start ordering fairly soon if I want to avoid significant interruptions in my workflow.

Journal Entry #37

It just occurred to me that anyone who happens to be reading this might be wondering where an unknown roboticist with little business interest and no academic connections managed to acquire the manufacturing capability to create a machine of this complexity.

The simple answer is that I didn’t. My parents did. My parents owned a large robotics firm that specialized in advanced assembly line automation. The company is still around. In fact, it’s only grown larger in the years since they passed away. My parents stipulated in their will that a fixed percentage of company profits would be allocated as an allowance for their daughter, meaning me, for as long as the firm remains in operation.

I have no say in the management of the company, which is fine by me. I’m not particularly business-minded. I also have no access to company resources, which might have come in handy, but I digress.

What I do have access to is the family home, and by extension the private prototyping lab contained therein. As an only child, it was left to me and me alone. My parents used it to develop proprietary technologies for their business, in a bid to remain competitive. It contains just about everything a person could possibly need to fabricate sophisticated and intricate machinery.

Nowadays it’s simply a place for me to tinker my life away.

Journal Entry #38

So, it turns out that a person can’t just order individual smartphone components. Apparently they only sell them via enormous bulk orders intended for manufacturing giants. Not exactly feasible for a tinkerer working out of her home.

This is a problem, as I designed Mariimo under the assumption that I’d have easy access to powerful and compact mobile microprocessors. Her faceplate simply isn’t spacious enough to house standard PC components.

Not all is lost, however. I’ve made a bulk order containing about a dozen top-of-the-line refurbished smartphones, in hopes that I can strip them down and cannibalize the parts. They can keep me from buying their chips, but they can’t keep me from tearing apart their phones.

Journal Entry #39

The smartphones arrived the other day. They really don’t want you taking these things apart. I suppose it makes business sense to keep people from repairing or modifying their devices, but from an ethical and educational standpoint it’s a pretty garbage thing to do.

The process of disassembling a smartphone is needlessly convoluted. It involves heat pads, heat guns, picks, suction cups, booby traps, proprietary screw heads… it’s absurd.

I didn’t let it get to me, though. All in all I managed to salvage two matching twelve-megapixel cameras, an accelerometer, and twelve fully intact octa-core processors along with their associated RAM. Eventually all of these components will be rearranged onto a custom motherboard, creating a sort of low-key supercomputer.

Journal Entry #40

I received another package in the mail today. This one was full of sensors that I knew I wouldn’t be able to strip from the smartphones. I managed to get my hands on the heat sensor I needed for her air compressor, as well as upwards of fifty digital encoders. She’s going to have quite a few points of articulation to keep track of.

I’m just going to start setting the prefab components aside as they arrive.

Journal Entry #41

The hearing aids arrived. I’ve got a surplus of microphones left over from the smartphone teardown, but I’d rather not use them. Smartphone microphones don’t provide particularly high audio quality, which is the reason most people doing professional recording opt for external microphones.

Hearing aids, on the other hand, are created specifically to augment the hearing of people with disabilities. They have to be good. I was careful to choose a model with a high dynamic range and wide frequency range. Many hearing aids are tuned to assist with voice perception specifically, but I want Mariimo to be able to hear anything that I can.

Obviously the included speakers won’t be necessary in this instance, as the microphones will be wired directly into her head.

I feel like I’m forgetting to mention something. I’ll add it later if it comes back to me.

Journal Entry #42

Oh right, I remember now. She’s going to have an asymmetrical microphone arrangement, to allow for more precise directional hearing. I figured I might as well complete the owl-like senses motif I introduced with the fixed cameras.

Journal Entry #43

The hard drives have arrived. I don’t have anything particularly interesting to say about them. I just thought I’d mention it.

Journal Entry #44

An important delivery today. An impressive assortment of pneumatic muscles. Every length and thickness you can imagine. A matching solenoid valve for each one as well. It took me nearly forty-five minutes to unpack the box. I’ll admit I was probably being a bit overly precious with them, but still.

At one point I started wondering if I could have just built these from scratch. The answer is yes, by the way. But there’s honestly no compelling reason I would need to. Actuators like these have been around since the 1950s. The technology has already been perfected. There’s no point in reinventing the wheel.

Nevertheless, it feels good to finally hold them in my hands.

Journal Entry #45

The supercapacitors just arrived. That’s probably going to be the last of the prefabricated shipments I’ll be receiving. From this point on it’s just going to be raw materials. Plastics, metals, fabrics, etc.

The supercapacitors actually took on a far more functional role in Mariimo’s design than I had initially anticipated. Their mass and numbers allowed for a lot of fiddling with weight distribution. Most of them ended up in her extremities, counteracting what had become a rather core-heavy design.

As it stands now, Mariimo is shaping up to be quite a finely balanced machine.

Journal Entry #46

The digital prototype is nearly complete. A few more days polish and it should be good to go. The fact that I started with detailed blueprints made the whole process go a lot faster.

I had to make a few minor adjustments based on the measurements of the prefab components as they arrived. There were a few unexpected discrepancies between the advertised dimensions and the actual dimensions, but I managed to smooth everything over design-wise.

Her external appearance remains unaltered, thank goodness. I’ve actually grown rather attached to her, aesthetically speaking.

Journal Entry #47

Aaand done. I’ve created a fully detailed 3D model of every individual component in Mariimo’s body, ready to be fed into the CNC milling machine.

I think I’m going to take a week off before I begin actual physical fabrication. Clear my head. Relax. I’ve been working fourteen hour days for longer than is probably healthy. I’ve always had a tendency to push myself too hard.

I’m going to spend the next seven days on low-power mode. Make some tea, curl up with a good book, just take it easy.

I’ve earned it.

Journal Entry #48

I made it two days. Two days before I couldn’t stand not working anymore.

The book I picked out was a story about robots and artificial intelligence. Probably not the best choice to take my mind off robots and artificial intelligence. I couldn’t even sit back and enjoy the story. I was constantly sidetracked by thoughts about the feasibility of these fictional machines. How they might be achieved in reality. The actual narrative just seemed like background noise.

I almost tried wandering the grounds, but the sound of traffic makes me anxious. It also makes me think about autonomous vehicles, which makes me think about robotics in general, which makes me think about the project. Even the most tenuous reminder of anything robotics related sends my brain off on a technical tangent that lasts for hours. It’s a compulsion.

I’ve been like this ever since I was little. My mom used to call it freight train brain. Can’t slow down. Can’t change direction.

It’s been a challenge. I struggled in school. My interests were too narrow. None of the curriculum could hold my attention. I would just end up fidgeting anxiously at my desk for hours. Eventually it began to affect my mental health, and my parents pulled me out of the system.

I was home schooled from then on, but even then it involved a lot of answer sheets and fudged test scores. My parents seemed to turn a blind eye toward the whole thing. I tried to hide it, but they had to have known. I don’t think I would have gotten away with it otherwise. When I finally turned sixteen, I was legally allowed to just drop the whole charade and give up.

I never actually graduated high school.

Journal Entry #49

Okay, the CNC milling machine has been prepped and is currently doing its thing. CNC milling takes time, but it’s a lot better than doing it by hand.

I’ve started with the PVC components, as they’ll make up the bulk of Mariimo’s armature. In the end, I decided against going full PVC. It’s tough stuff, but I was concerned about friction wear and stress damage in her joints. I decided to reinforce them with aluminum bearings. The weight and elasticity of plastic. The resilience of metal. It feels like a good compromise.

I’m going to start looking for odd jobs to pass the time while the milling machine whittles away.

Journal Entry #50

I hauled a huge spool of copper wire up from the basement today. I figured I‘d start work on the copper coils needed for inductive charging. Nice mindless work. Relaxing.

The coils in the soles of her feet are going to be about six and a half centimeters in diameter. The pair inside the charging stand will be larger, at roughly fifteen centimeters each. The size difference will allow for some leeway regarding foot placement. Hopefully this makes it a bit easier for her to charge herself autonomously.

The stand itself is going to be machined out of a nice charcoal gray PVC, just a shade darker than her neoprene skin. It was a little tricky to find raw PVC in that particular color, but I think that the end result will be well worth the effort, aesthetically speaking.

Journal Entry #51

Took it easy today. I’d finished work on the copper coils, so I figured I’d take a couple hours to prepare the soles of her feet.

I used a laser cutter to cut a pair of circular disks from a sheet of self-adhesive polyurethane rubber, the same material used in the soles of shoes. Mariimo actually has a relatively small footprint, but the extra friction provided by the rubber soles should help compensate for the minimal surface area.

I also used the copper coils and a rubber sheet to assemble a quick and dirty inductive charging test. I wanted to check and see if the polyurethane layer would interfere with the charging process. According to the readout on my multimeter, it doesn’t seem to have any significant impact.

Journal Entry #52

When it came time to disassemble the digital prototype into individual components for fabrication, Mariimo’s neoprene skin was a bit of a stumbling block. I had to teach myself how to create a sewing pattern by cutting a 3D model into segments and flattening them out into two-dimensional shapes, which is something I had never attempted before. There was a bit of a learning curve.

Today I was prepping the laser cutter to cut the neoprene into the pattern I had prototyped on the computer, but fortunately I thought to stop and do a quick safety check first. As it turns out, cutting neoprene with a laser releases plumes of chlorine gas, which can corrode the glass optics in the laser cutter itself. It probably wouldn’t do my lungs any favors either.

Looks like I’m doing this one by hand.

Journal Entry #53

I’ve assembled the various fabrics and foils needed to start work on Mariimo’s touch sensors. These I can cut with a laser.

It’s a good thing too, because there will be a lot of them. The laser cutter will save me many, many hours of fumbling with scissors. I’ll need to get more involved when it comes time to sew the layers together, but my new sewing machine will help scoot the process along.

The flatlock sewing machine is the latest addition to the prototype lab. As you might imagine, there wasn’t much demand for textiles back when my parents were in charge of the lab. I purchased the sewing machine especially for this project.

It’s a pretty heavy-duty machine, which is important because it has to chew through four millimeters of neoprene rubber. Not exactly light work.

Journal Entry #54

It was a little tricky to do by hand, but I finally managed to cut out the neoprene panels that will make up Mariimo’s skin. There are a few more steps remaining before they’re ready to sew together, however.

I still need to screen print the circuits needed for the touch sensors onto the neoprene using a conductive metallic paint. The prototype lab has screen printing supplies on hand for creating more traditional fiberglass circuit boards. With a few minor adjustments, they should work just as well for creating flexible neoprene circuit boards.

After that, I can arrange the touch sensors into their predesignated pattern, laminate both sides with an appropriately colored nylon knit fabric, trim off the excess, and punch holes along the edges for the eyelets and paracord.

It probably would have been easier to do all of this before I cut out the neoprene panels, but I’m clumsy enough with scissors that I didn’t want to risk ruining all that work with a stray cut.

Journal Entry #55

I’ve started fiddling with Mariimo’s charge indicator. Usually a segmented electronic display is the kind of thing you’d outsource to a specialist manufacturer, but I’ve already got all the materials I need left over from my faceplate experiments. I just need to apply the electrophoretic microcapsule suspension to a flexible film instead of a polycarbonate shell.

It’s probably for the best that I do it myself. Ordering custom electrophoretic displays usually entails enormous bulk orders. I really only need the one.

Journal Entry #56

For Mariimo’s memory foam inserts, I’m going to use a technique called pressure cutting. It’s the same technique used to create lightweight, inexpensive department store mannequins.

The process begins with a set of molds. I’m using the 3-axis milling machine to carve them out of medium-density fiberboard while the 5-axis machine is busy with the PVC components.

When the molds are complete, a thick slab of memory foam will be layered on top, and the entire assembly will be passed between a set of rollers, compressing the memory foam while a thin, sharp blade slices away the excess material.

When the final product pops out the other side, the two layers of foam are separated, resulting in both a positive and negative impression of the original mold. It’s honestly a little difficult to describe. The process is kind of counterintuitive.

I’m going to use zip ties to secure the memory foam to Mariimo’s armature. They’re easy to replace, so I can simply snip them away in the event that I need to access her internal machinery.

Journal Entry #57

Mariimo’s PVC components are finally complete. That leaves the 5-axis CNC milling machine free. I’m going to give it a thorough vacuuming and get it prepped to start work on her air compressor.

The air compressor is going to be machined from several blocks of solid aluminum. I’ll need to switch out the current rotary bits for a more suitable set, but other than that the milling machine is fully capable of handling metals.

The only part of the air compressor that won’t be made from scratch is the motor. That motor is going to be the heart of the machine, so it’s vital that it be of the absolute highest quality.

Lucky for me, I found the ideal candidate while I was reviewing inventory early on in the project. It had been kicking around in storage since my parents were still around. It may not be the latest model, but I learned a long time ago that newer doesn’t necessarily mean better.

Journal Entry #58

Mariimo’s polycarbonate faceplate is going to be the focal point of her entire design. It’s going to require special attention.

I can use the CNC milling machine to get started, for sure. However, that’s only the first step of many. In order to get that beautiful frosted matte finish I’m after, it’s going to take hours of careful scouring, polishing, buffing, and sandblasting. It’s got to be flawless. I have a very specific vision.

When I’ve managed to get the outer surface of the faceplate looking just so, I can go ahead and apply an electrophoretic display to its inner surface, using the same techniques I developed for my cereal bowl prototype.

If all goes according to plan, this faceplate is going to be the single most beautiful component I’ve ever created.

Journal Entry #59

I’ve already managed to gather all of the electronic components needed to create Mariimo’s motherboard. Today, I started work on the printed circuit board that will house them all.

Like I mentioned before, the prototype lab contains all the equipment and materials needed to create PCBs. It’s a fairly straightforward process. I’ve done it plenty of times before. But this time it feels different, somehow.

I hold this simple piece of copper coated fiberglass in my gloved hand, fresh out of a corrosive chemical bath, and I can’t help but think to myself: This is it. This is the scaffolding of a mind.

I can’t even begin to describe that feeling.

Journal Entry #60

Okay, the printed circuit board is complete. It looks gorgeous. It has the same shield-like silhouette that her faceplate will have. You can already see where the cameras will be wired in. It almost feels alive, in a way. Like it’s got a little personality of its own. It’s quite endearing.

I’m getting way ahead of myself though. It’s got a long way to go before it becomes a functioning motherboard. Luckily, micro soldering is one of the few fine motor skills I’ve become really proficient in since the accident.

Journal Entry #61

I fell asleep in my chair last night. I was just sitting in my office, staring at my marimo colony. The water in that aquarium is so still, and so clear. It always helps temper my anxiety.

By the time I woke up, the milling machine had already finished carving Mariimo’s polycarbonate faceplate. The benefits of automation, I suppose. I’ve spent the morning gently scouring out the ridges left behind by the milling process. It’s relaxing work. Simple. Repetitive. Gives me time to think.

Journal Entry #62

Oof. Perhaps too much time to think.

Journal Entry #63

Okay, Mariimo’s faceplate has been scoured, polished, and buffed. Perfect optical clarity. It’s like looking through distilled water. Of course, now that I’ve gone to all that work, it’s time to muck it up with a good sandblasting.

I’ve been practicing my sandblasting with spare scraps of polycarbonate sheet. I need to frost the surface enough to diffuse the light passing through it, but not so much that her facial expressions become obscured. It’s a delicate balance.

I also need to make sure that the surface has a completely even finish. No flaws. No imperfections. That’s honestly been the trickiest bit.

I’m getting the hang of it though.

Journal Entry #64

The sandblasting went surprisingly smoothly. After giving the faceplate a good rinse, I went ahead and applied the electrophoretic display. Once again, I’ll refrain from going into too much detail about the process. My patent application is still pending.

As it stands now, the faceplate is a smooth, even gray color. The pigments inside the microcapsules are still jumbled. I’m going to write a simple program this evening to test the display. I’ll have it done in time to run the test in the morning.

Journal Entry #65

I ran the faceplate display test last night. I couldn’t help myself. I had finished writing the program, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep without at least giving it a shot, so I wired up the display.

It worked flawlessly.

The display flashed from a smooth, even gray to a brilliant paper white. It cycled rapidly between black and white a few times for calibration purposes, before settling back on white.

Then her face appeared. For the first time. Two clean, simple rings in a gentle achromatic gray. They just stared for a moment, ran a simple blinking animation, and began cycling through various facial expressions.

It was just a simple slide show. There was no thought or purpose behind it. Yet I couldn’t help but feel as if she were staring directly at me. Addressing me, personally.

What a notion to fall asleep to…

Journal Entry #66

I spent the day doing a comprehensive inventory check. Each of Mariimo’s components are complete and accounted for. Every single one. I’m ready to begin assembly.

It feels fantastic.

CHAPTER THREE: ASSEMBLY

Journal Entry #67

I’m going to begin assembly with Mariimo’s PVC armature. The whole thing goes together with machine screws, so it should be fairly straightforward. I’m going to have to install her digital encoders during the process as well, seeing as they’re housed within the joints themselves. They have to be in place before each joint is screwed shut.

Journal Entry #68

Armature assembled. It looks like a skeleton splayed out on my workbench. I went ahead and installed her air compressor, compressed air storage tank, solenoid valve bank, and supercapacitor array as well. It’s important I get her core elements in place before I start layering pneumatic muscles and foam over everything.

Journal Entry #69

Mariimo’s pneumatic muscles have been installed, along with many, many meters of pneumatic tubing. The tubing runs along grooves and hollows in Mariimo’s armature, so as not to get tangled up in all those moving parts. Various wires, like the ones connected to her digital encoders, run along these grooves as well.

I like to keep things tidy.

Journal Entry #70

This would go a lot faster if I still had both my hands.

Journal Entry #71

I guess I forgot to mention the amputee thing, huh? I was in an accident about seven years ago that required a below-elbow amputation. Right hand. Non-dominant, thank goodness.

It does make getting work done more difficult. I’m fortunate to have access to a lot of automated manufacturing equipment. I wouldn’t be able to do a fraction of the work I do without it. Still, the actual hands-on work does tend to go slower than it would otherwise.

Whatever. I’m over it.

Journal Entry #72

I spent my morning zip-tying memory foam to Mariimo’s armature. It feels like assembling a robotic mattress. It’s going smoothly, though. At this rate, the last of her memory foam inserts should be fitted tightly in place by the end of the day.

I’m not gonna lie, the process is immensely satisfying. It feels like she’s finally beginning to take shape.

Journal Entry #73

I should clarify. I do wear a prosthesis. Nothing fancy, just a standard body powered split hook. It does make things significantly easier, though.

I’ve got a collection of several different hooks. Which one I choose depends on the task at hand. The canted hooks are good for detailed work, and I’ve got a couple lyre shaped hooks for handling bulkier objects. Both types come in a plain stainless steel version, as well as a version with a nitrile rubber grip for handling delicate or slippery items. I’ve also got a work hook for heavy-duty lifting and tooling, and a specialized soldering attachment for assembling circuit boards.

I made that last one myself.

Journal Entry #74

I suppose it’s a little ironic that a roboticist has what basically amounts to a hook for a hand. Advanced myoelectric arms are available. Five fingers. Full articulation. Responds to natural muscle movement.

I can afford it, too. I did afford it. It’s gathering dust in the basement as we speak. It’s an impressive piece of technology, to be sure. I just… can’t wear the thing.

It’s the sound. The vibration against my skin. That god-awful motorized screeching. It’s like nails on a chalkboard. A constant, irritating reminder that something is missing. I can’t handle it.

I don’t mind those types of sensations when they’re coming from say, the CNC milling machine. That’s different. That’s separate. But when it’s an extension of myself, when there’s no escape short of physically tearing it away from my body… that’s another story altogether.

It’s… anxiety inducing.

Journal Entry #75

Sorry, I need to vent. Writing about my amputation has me fixated on the accident. I’ve got no one I can talk to about things like this, so I’m just going to put it here.

I lost my hand in a traffic accident. I was sitting in the back seat. Right side. I was hanging my hand out the rear window, absentmindedly playing with the wind. My mom was in the front passenger seat. Dad was driving. We were t-boned by a truck at an intersection.

No one was at fault. The traffic light had malfunctioned. It should have defaulted to red in the event of a malfunction, but it didn’t. The bones in my hand and wrist were splintered. The soft tissue was pulp. It was prepped for amputation as soon as I got to the hospital.

I got off easy. My parents didn’t even make it to the hospital.

I still have nightmares about it. They’re not as frequent as they used to be, but I’m not sure I’ll ever be rid of them completely. Let’s just say it’s an unpleasant way to start one’s day.

I also got saddled with this fucking phantom pain. The perfect little reminder. Every time it flares up I get flashbacks. Panic attacks. Breakdowns. I live alone, so I have no choice but to just tough it out.

I should be happy. I’ll never need to work a day in my goddamn life. I’ve inherited a fortune. More arrives each month like clockwork. I live in a fucking mansion! I shouldn’t feel this way!

But no. I’m afraid of people, I’m afraid to leave the house, and there’s not a single person in this world I can confide in.

I’m so fucking lonely.

Journal Entry #76

I apologize for my previous entry. I should be keeping this journal more professional. I tend to keep things bottled up inside, and eventually the dam just… breaks.

It won’t happen again.

Journal Entry #77

Mariimo is fully assembled. I didn’t really document it that closely. I haven’t been feeling well. I’m going to take a break before I start programming.

CHAPTER FOUR: PROGRAMMING

Journal Entry #78

Okay. Programming. Where to even start?

Neural networks are a good place, I suppose. Neural networks are the bread and butter of developmental robotics. The behaviors needed to navigate real-world scenarios are far too complex to program by hand. There are simply too many variables to take into consideration. Neural networks allow complex and nuanced behaviors to emerge naturally, through trial and error learning.

Mariimo is going to use neural networks extensively. She’s going to be running on a multiple network system. Each sensory system will have its own dedicated neural network, roughly analogous to the various sensory cortices of a human brain.

Her sensors will feed raw data into the corresponding network’s input layer. The data will then be interpreted within the web of neurons that compose the hidden layers, and the results will be spat out the other side. From the output layer, the data will be rerouted into a central neural network, where the compiled data from every sensory network will be compared, and patterns identified.

It’s my hope that by keeping the sensory networks separate, I can prevent a synesthesia-like blending of senses. A machine with synesthesia could very well prove to be a worthwhile project, but it’s not my goal with Mariimo.

Journal Entry #79

Speaking of goals, they will be absolutely vital to Mariimo’s development. Without goals, there is no drive. No learning. An artificial intelligence without goals would have no reason to take any action at all. The question is, what motivates Mariimo?

There is a concept in machine learning known as “reinforcement learning.” It works on the same principles in machine learning as it does in behavioral psychology; i.e. positive and negative reinforcement. This concept will be at the core of Mariimo’s behavior.

Think of it as a scoreboard. Each time Mariimo perceives a stimulus designated as positive, a point is added. Each time she perceives a stimulus designated as negative, a point is removed. By specifying that her goal is to increase her score, she can be motivated to seek out positive stimuli, while avoiding negative ones.

Her metaphorical scoreboard will be separated into several different categories. This will allow different types of stimuli to be weighted by importance. In this way, important stimuli can be given priority over unimportant ones. I’ll provide these weights in the beginning, but she’ll be able to adjust her own priorities over time, given new information.

I’m going to spend the next little while deciding, sensor by sensor, which stimuli will be designated as positive, and which will be designated as negative.

Journal Entry #80

While striving toward goals is all well and good, learning to achieve those goals without outside influence would be a very, very slow process. This is where mimicry comes in. Mimicry is going to be another core aspect of Mariimo’s behavior. It will allow her to learn by example, rather than simply be left

Novella: Scandalous Passions

Scotland, 1504.

Lady Janet Fraser didn’t earn her reputation as Scotland’s most notorious sinner by following the rules. A former mistress of King James IV, she’s content to live her life from pleasure to pleasure. Even if those pleasures—and people—are forbidden.

People like Sir Lachlan Ross, given the moniker The Highland Beast, a man as intimidating in battle as he is in size. A beast she discovers secretly wishes to be tamed and submit to her dominance.

Or like her new ward, Lady Marjorie Hepburn, a convent-raised virgin with a desire to be taught all the sensual secrets of the marriage bed. Things that Janet is fully willing to teach her, again and again. There’s much for her to learn.

And forbidden pleasures like the three of them together in one bed.

But Lachlan and Marjorie both have ties to the king. As wicked lusts are indulged and affection unexpectedly grows into love, breaking the rules this time could mean all of their undoing…

Title: Scandalous Passions

Author: Nicola Davidson

Format: Digital/Audiobook

Steam Level: Steamy

Series: Complete (?)

Link:https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B0879GQ3NS/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_EGZCT5EE9GSP73FMJ1HE

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

This novella is the first entry in the Highland Ménage series and, so far, the only one that’s F/F/M. The relationship between Janet and Marjorie is hot and sweet, and when Lachlan is added it doesn’t feel like he takes away from them. This is ménage series so Lachlan does have a relationship and sex with Janet and Marjorie both singularly and together. What I love about this novella is that there is no one relationship more important than the other, they only work as a thruple and not one-on-one. The sex is explicit, on page, and extremely hot. I just zoomed through this story and immediately bought book two (it’s a F/M/M relationship so I won’t be reviewing it here.) There is a little bit of violence and blood but it’s not gory, it felt appropriate for this setting. I loved all three characters and the villains who try to keep them apart are fun root against. I liked how it is stressed that communication is important and vital for them. It’s always important in every relationship and it’s nice to see that reflected here. The guy on the cover doesn’t look like how he’s described in the book and neither do the woman but that’s the problem with stock pictures, it doesn’t take away how hot and fun this story though. Overall, I really enjoyed this and a great introduction to a ménage story if you have not tried one.

If you are looking at romance books, you’re bound to come across the shorthand F/F/M or F/M/F and the like. This is to show who has sex/in love with who. A F/F/M story means both the female characters have a relationship together and with the male character. A F/M/F story means the female characters don’t have a relationship together but do with the male character. A M/M/F story means the two male characters have a relationship (people will say ‘the swords cross’) and with the female character. That middle symbol indicates who has a relationship with who in a ménage relationship.

The reason I say complete for now, is that if a romance book isn’t a stand alone, it usually has three books but I don’t see anything on the author’s website about another book.

Website:http://www.nicola-davidson.com

Super Special (Mermaid) Cover Reveal!

Super Special (Mermaid) Cover Reveal!

#newrelease #coverreveal #fantasy #mermaid #siren #fantasy

Hi reader friends! Sorry for my absence the last couple weeks, but I’ve been crazy busy with life and writing and all of that stuff. I promise I’ll be getting back to talking all things books and reading next month!

But today, I have a super special cover reveal for you, one I’m super excited about for a book that’s been in the works for years. A couple years ago, I entered a Snow White…

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